His eyes opened to slits. “Who’s there?”
“Who do you think?”
He sighed. “What’s going on?”
“I thought I’d let you know Lexi and I are leaving now.”
“That’s it? Have a safe trip.” He lay back down, heavily.
I hesitated. “Do you know anything about the man you’ve been working for?”
“Enough.”
“Come with us. Nik doesn’t like the idea of anybody getting in his way and, if he thinks you know too much, you probably don’t want to be around when he doesn’t need you anymore.”
He was quiet, considering. “You make a good argument,” he said.
“Have you unpacked already?”
“Nope. To be honest, I wasn’t planning on sticking around.”
The floor creaked behind me. Just Lexi. “So, are we going then?” she asked.
“Sure.” Eric flung off the covers, pulled a shirt over his head, and slid on his jeans. “He’s given me the cash he promised. Let’s go.” We left quietly, making our way down the hall and out of the front door. I noticed Eric left it ajar slightly, so the click wouldn’t wake Nik.
Chapter 14
We drove straight down the highway, away from the gravel road and the house and the threat of Nik. As the sky began to lighten, Eric glanced at me for the first time in the rear view mirror. “So where, exactly, are we headed?” he asked.
I’d been giving it a lot of thought. The easiest way to keep Lexi safe was to send her back home, alone. Disconnect her entirely from Eric and myself. She would be far more difficult to find on her own. “The nearest bus station,” I replied.
Eric laughed, his voice loud in the cramped car. “Bus station? I really didn’t figure you for a public transportation kind of guy.”
“For Lexi.”
“I have nowhere in particular I need to go. I could drive her. You don’t trust me to get her home?”
Not by a long shot. “It’s safer for both of you. It will be harder for him to track you if you’re not together.”
“How could that old man find us, anyway?”
“He found me, didn’t he?”
“Yeah, thanks to me.”
“There’s always someone willing to do another person’s dirty work.”
“Fair enough,” he said. “So we just split up and wait for him to find us?”
“We split up so he doesn’t find us.” I put my hand on Lexi’s shoulder. “Nik doesn’t know anything about Lexi—where she’s from, where she lives. How much have you told him, Eric?”
“Nothing—he didn’t even ask where I found you. He just wanted to know that I was bringing you back.”
“And does he know where you’re from?”
“I’m not really from anywhere anymore. He found me begging for change and offered to change my life. It will be easy for me to disappear.”
“Nik will know that, too. Make sure, Eric, you don’t go back to where he found you.”
Eric was the type of guy I would have recruited as one of my contacts as well. He had nothing going for him, except us now. And even that was temporary.
“You don’t have any family?” Lexi asked.
“Of course I have family. I just haven’t spoken to any of them for years.”
“Why not?”
“I ran away when I was thirteen. Stupid, really. I thought I would join a band, make it big in Las Vegas. It didn’t happen, of course. My friends disappeared. And going back home would be humiliating. So, here I am.”
“Could you go back now?”
“I don’t know. Maybe. What would I say? After the things I’ve done?”
“Would that matter to them?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know.” I felt his struggle. What do you say to a family who may not even want you back?
“I know, if I lost someone I loved, I would watch for them every single day until they came home.” Lexi’s voice was quiet.
“I knew it would crush my mom when I took off. I didn’t care. Figured she’d just get over it. Maybe she has already.”
“Bet she hasn’t,” Lexi said. “I’d go back, if I were you.”
“It’s what you are doing,” I reminded her gently.
“I know.” We followed Lexi’s GPS into the next city and then to the first bus depot. Lexi disappeared into the big gray building to buy a ticket home.
“And you’re taking off too?” Eric asked, mostly just to fill the silence.
“Yeah. Once Lexi’s gone, I’ll wait in your car until night falls, if you don’t mind.”
Lexi swung open the door and sat back down, bus ticket in hand. She craned around in her seat to look at me. “You’re really going to do this on your own?”
“I need to,” I said.
“I’d go with you, you know. In a heartbeat.”
“I know.”
Eric cleared his throat uncomfortably. “This is getting a little awkward. I’m gonna go get something to eat, okay?” When neither of us responded, he sighed and left the car, closing the door gently behind him.
“I’m in love with you, you know,” she said. “I really am.”
“I know.”
“I’ve never felt anything like this, for anyone. And now I don’t think I could love anyone else.” I didn’t respond, and I wasn’t sure if she wanted me to. Instead, I just looked at her, this amazing girl with the fiery red hair and dark purple contacts. I noticed her roots were starting to grow in. Strawberry blonde.
“You’ll be fine,” I said. I didn’t offer any sentiments of my own. She had known how this was going to end.
“Joshua?” she said, after a moment.
“Yeah?”
“What if it doesn’t work out?”
I didn’t ask her what she meant. There were dozens of ways I could fail. I might not be able to find them. They might have moved. They might not welcome me back.
“Then I’ll move on, I guess. Figure out what to do next when I get there.”
“I’ll be watching for you, you know.”
“You shouldn’t.”
“I know. But I will. All this stuff—my life, my home, my friends—none of it really matters. I would give it up for you in a second.”
“I would never ask you to do that.”
“You wouldn’t need to ask. I’m just telling you that I would. You’ll always have a home with me, if you want it.”
“Okay.” What else could I say? The interior light clicked on as Eric swung open the door and hopped in, a tray of drinks and a bag of food in his arms.
“You guys done?” he asked, rhetorically. “Good. I’m hungry and tired of feeling uncomfortable. Food.” He placed the drink tray on the center console and tossed a turkey sandwich at me. As I unwrapped the plastic, he handed one to Lexi and opened his own. As we ate, he grabbed two napkins and wrote something down on each of them. He handed one to me and one to Lexi. “It’s my parents’ number,” he said. “In case things don’t work out there and you wanna look me up. I’d give you my cell number, but I ditched the phone back there with Nik. Just in case.”
We settled in to wait, and too soon, it was time for her to go. Without a word, she got out of the car, walked around to the trunk, and pulled out her bag. Eric motioned to help, but she waved him off. Then, to my surprise, she came around to my door, pulled it open, and crawled in tight beside me. Eric looked pointedly out his window. “If you change your mind, you know where to find me.” She pressed her lips against mine. And then she was gone, through the glass doors leading to the bus terminal.
We waited until the bus pulled away, and I saw her at the window, palm flat against the glass, looking unwaveringly at our car until I could no longer make her out. We watched until the bus disappeared around the corner, and then we continued sitting, staring at the empty street. Finally, Eric settled back into his seat. “Are you good to go? Or did you want to wait for nightfall here?”
“No, let’s drive. The more distance between one
another, the better.” As we set out, I stared at the passing city, then at the fields. I could still taste her lips on mine. Eric wasn’t in a talkative mood, and I was grateful for the fact. I knew I’d have a lot of time for solitary thought in the future, and maybe I should have wanted to use this fleeting time for conversation or companionship, but I didn’t have anything more I wanted to say.
As the sun disappeared over the horizon, I knew it was time to set out on my own. I tapped Eric’s shoulder. He glanced briefly at me in the mirror and then pulled onto the shoulder of the highway. I waited until a convoy of trucks had passed us and the night was quiet and still. My bag was already at my feet, and I picked it up. I got out of the car. My wings were ready—I could feel their energy as I thought about being in the sky again. I leaned in once more. “Thanks for the ride.”
“No problem, Man. It’s been interesting. Good luck with—whatever.”
“Thanks. And don’t look back, okay?”
“Don’t plan to.”
I slammed the door and walked out into the field. I watched his car peel away and the taillights disappear down the long, flat stretch of highway. Then I was up, in the air, above the beautiful mess of the world.
Nik’s instructions had been clear. From just outside of Colorado to the mountains in Siberia, Russia, it would be close to 4800 miles. I couldn’t cross directly over the ocean—it would be too long a flight without a place to land. I’d have to go up through Wyoming and Idaho, cross into Canada, and then fly through to Alaska. Then there would be a short stint over the ocean before hitting Russia. If I managed to fly ten hours a day—and I was pretty sure I could do it, as long as I found places to crash during the daylight hours when I was passing cities—it would take me ten days, flying at a quick pace.
I watched the landscape fade beneath me. I knew much of the way by heart. There were very few places in the world my wings hadn’t taken me, and navigating the skies was instinctive; it always had been. I used to be surprised at how easily I recognized landmarks and specific areas.
Getting there went fairly smoothly. It rained the first day of my journey. By the seventh day, it was snowing. Shaving was impossible and, by the time I crossed the ocean, I’d actually managed to grow a beard. It was a new feeling for me, like I’d aged years, rather than just over a week. I hadn’t ever tried to let it grow before.
When I finally arrived in Russia, I’d finished the little food I’d packed. The air, up in the Siberian mountains, was cooler than I was used to, but I wasn’t cold. Nik had been right; this was home. As I reached the untouched wilderness and let my wings carry me higher into the mountains, it was as if my body knew the way. I could feel myself getting closer, like home was calling to me.
Finally, on the edges of the horizon, I could make out a small outcropping of caves like Nik had described. Nearing them, I scanned the sky for motion, and then turned to focus on the ground below. No signs of any life.
I landed at the entrance of the one nearest me. Still, silent. “Hello?” I called out into the cavern. “Is anyone here?” I stepped inside, out from the light of the early evening and into the black of the cave. My eyes took a moment to adjust. As the contours of the walls and ground slowly took shape, I couldn’t see any evidence of life outside of a few small creatures peering out at me from the shadows. “Hello?” I called once more and stopped to listen. Nothing.
I walked back out into the snow outside, my legs feeling heavy. I was more exhausted than I’d realized and it was so peaceful outside. I sat, leaning against the cool of the rock, and looked out into the orange sky. I’d come so close. The snow started to fall, and I closed my eyes. When I opened them again, it was dark, and I was surrounded.
Chapter 15
I blinked again and five young faces came sharply into focus. A boy, with two girls on either side of him, leaned in close to me, speaking loudly in a language I didn’t recognize, one I’d never heard spoken before. The cadence and rhythm was unfamiliar, the word breaks unrecognizable in a flow of syllables and sounds from deep in the throat.
I struggled to my feet, my legs still stiff with sleep, and the children stepped back abruptly. Their fur tunics, leather boots, and long translucent wings affirmed what my instincts had been telling me since I’d neared this place—I’d found my way home.
The children fell silent as the boy extended his right hand, using the other to brush a brown strand of hair from his eyes. He hesitated, his hand hovering just beside my cheek. I nodded, once, and he pressed his palm to my face.
Nothing happened. I’d been expecting to be flooded with memories like I had been with Nik. Instead, the boy just looked at me, waiting.
“You want my memories?” I asked. I had no idea how to show him anything. I’d been able to show Nik a memory, but it had been an accident. I had no idea how to control it. I’d been away from them my whole life.
The boy replied, his words little more than an assortment of sounds to me. The rest were quiet, their gazes unwavering. Still waiting.
I closed my eyes, picturing the Manhattan Skyline, the light from the towers and citadels illuminating the night. In my memory, I navigated the sky just above and then, on impulse, swooped down to pass close beside the spire of the One World Tower. The air was cool and, although I’d seen it dozens of times, the vibrant tapestry still took my breath away.
The boy dropped his hand and when I opened my eyes he’d already grasped the hands of the girls on either side of him, who linked their hands with the two girls beside them. A murmur of sound passed between them. He was undoubtedly sharing my memory with them. When he returned his hand to my face, he was still linked with the children on his left, and the girl on his right moved forward to touch his arm. A sense of wonder, so strong it was almost palpable, radiated from them. They’d never seen a cityscape before.
“You like that?” I asked. “You’ll love this.” I envisioned San Francisco now, remembering the last time I navigated that sky, weaving slowly through the maze of skyscrapers. I’d been on my way back to my apartment but, as I neared the Golden Gate Bridge, I gave into a rare impulse and wound my way down to the top of the red tower. I landed on the edge of the platform. Although the lanes below were alive with the sound of late night traffic, the moment was one of peace, with the wind teasing the tips of my wings and the lights from the bridge cables refracting off the still water below.
Without meaning to, I thought of Lexi. She would have loved to see San Francisco from the sky. Her face appeared in my mind, and I could feel their emotions spike in response to mine. Reining in my thoughts, I pictured the places I’d seen with her during our last days together instead; the wide expanse of fields, the long, wild grass, the empty starlit sky.
One of the girls spoke to me, and, although I couldn’t understand the words, I felt the sentiment behind them. Wonder. She said something to the boy and he nodded. A different image appeared in my mind, one I hadn’t created. It was a snow-covered world, very much like the one Nik had shown me, but with a slightly different arrangement of mountains. If this were my tribe, they must have moved farther north. On the surface of the mountains were great caverns and, between their peaks, flew others like them. Like me.
I brought the face of my first mother to mind. If they were from my tribe, maybe they’d recognize her. The same image echoed back to me, only this woman was older, with graying hair and lines around her eyes. The smile was the same.
The girl who had spoken to me said something to the girl beside her. Their wings came to life, and the two rose into the air. I watched them vanish into the distance and then looked back at the boy. He nodded and showed me three men in brown tunics. On their backs, slung between each of their four, almost translucent wings, were long bows, and quivers of arrows hung at their hips. Then, he looked up and pointed. I followed his gaze. The three men he’d shown me were approaching through the darkened sky. One of them called out, a loud, wordless shout. I raised my hand in greeting.
The th
ree landed on the snow in front of me, more gracefully than their muscled frames would have suggested possible. They spoke to the children first; after a short exchange, the children released their hands and left, rising quickly into the sky and disappearing beside the mountainside. The men turned their gazes to me again and, for the first time, I felt a flash of fear. The blond one closest me grasped my wrist, his fingers digging into my skin, and twisted me around sharply, so I found myself with my arm held tight behind me, his knees on my back, and my cheek against the snow. He barked something at me. When I didn’t reply, he said it louder.
“I don’t know what you’re saying,” I said, fighting the rising panic. “I don’t speak your language.”
The man shouted at me again, the pressure increasing. I couldn’t inhale. The edges of my vision darkened. If I didn’t do something soon, I was going to pass out. How was I supposed to explain what I was doing here when he couldn’t understand me? I pictured Nik’s face, when he was healthy. The pressure lessened, so I focused on the memory of Nik helping me up after the fire, when he found me in the snowy field. The man spoke again, his voice quieter but still sharp.
I showed him the Nik I knew now, the sunken cheeks and ashen complexion and frail body. I thought through the details of the visions he’d last given me; the day I was taken, the fire, and the specific way back home. I felt a wave of fear from the man who held me. I tried to project my emotions to him, the ones beyond my own distress. No harm. No danger.
The man rose, releasing me. I struggled to my feet and turned to face him. He extended his hand, and I reached out my own to grasp it. I was watching my mother and the younger Nik land flying towards the caves, carrying the empty blankets. I met his eye and nodded, laying my other hand on my chest.
He turned away abruptly, speaking rapidly to the other men. They laid their hands on his arms, and I knew he was showing them my memories. He looked again at me and pointed up to the way in which they had come. “Am I coming with you?” I asked. His wings carried him up off the ground. I followed, flanked by the others. The children hadn’t returned home after all; I noticed them appear from within a nook and follow us, holding hands. We flew deeper into the mountains, around several curves and into a larger section of caves and hills. As we dipped down into a slightly lower area, I caught my breath; the sky was filled with people like me. It was exactly like I’d seen in Nik’s memories, only more real and more beautiful. The place was alive at night. It was no wonder that I’d always loved the dark. There were animal pens, too, especially within the dips; sheep, pigs, chickens, cows. The men saw me looking and one of them touched my arm. I could see their uses immediately; meat and milk, just like in most places.
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