by Brenda Novak
* * *
It was all Dylan could do to remain seated. He wanted to go after Cheyenne. He was back to feeling sorry for her, wondering if he’d hoped for too much, demanded too much. She was going through hell right now and couldn’t handle a relationship, especially one that had flared into existence so fast and so unexpectedly. He was the first man she’d ever slept with. She was probably overwhelmed on top of everything else.
He could have some empathy, couldn’t he?
He could, and he did. Those emotions held him hostage. But, empathy or no, he couldn’t chase her down. His brothers would ask too many questions, and he still wasn’t sure which way his relationship with her would go, whether or not he wanted them to discover how he felt.
He sat and he ate, even though he could hardly taste his food. Then, as soon as he got home, he climbed on his bike without telling anyone he was leaving and went to find her.
He knew she wasn’t at her place. He’d checked when they passed by a few minutes earlier. So he headed into town.
It didn’t take long to locate her car. Her Oldsmobile was parked at the bed-and-breakfast where she worked.
Leaving his bike parked near the cemetery railing instead of pulling into the lot, he strode to the front stoop and tried the door.
It was locked. But he could see a light burning inside.
“Chey?” he called as he pounded on the door.
There was no answer.
“I know you’re in there.”
When she didn’t come, he went around to the back. The light he’d spotted in front streamed from a room off the kitchen. “Cheyenne!”
Another light snapped on and she appeared, but she stood well away from the door, as if she couldn’t trust herself to go any closer.
“Are you going to let me in?” he asked.
She covered her eyes with her hands, then dropped them and stepped forward. He heard the bolt slide back before she poked her head out. “What do you want?”
He didn’t move toward her but he told her the truth. “I want you. I think you know that.”
He meant what he’d said on a deeper level than she’d probably taken it. But when tears filled her eyes, he told himself that if only she’d ask, he’d give her more time. She just had to show him…something that would let him believe she might someday look at him the way she looked at Joe. “What do you want, Chey?”
“I don’t know, but…whatever it is, I can’t keep seeing you.”
That wasn’t the answer he’d been hoping for. But it was the one he’d expected.
“I can’t handle the risks of being in a relationship right now,” she added.
He’d had the same thought—that this was bad timing for her—while he was at the restaurant. And yet, he could see how his friendship, attention, maybe even his love, could help her, now more than ever.
How could she miss that they were perfect together? He knew she felt something when she was with him.
She was fighting the attraction. But that was her choice.
“Right. Okay.” Stepping forward, he cupped her face in his hands. He meant only to give her a simple kiss, a tender moment to remember him by. A farewell of sorts. But the touch of their lips caused a sudden change in them both, and they immediately fused together. He doubted he could have made himself pull away even if he’d wanted to.
Fortunately, she didn’t seem any more willing to let go. She wrapped her arms around his neck and, when he lifted her off her feet, wrapped her legs around him, too. Then he carried her inside, and she barely managed to kick the door shut before unbuttoning his jeans.
He was inside her in seconds, without a condom, without anything. They had most of their clothes on. He felt a desperate urge to convince her, to get her to acknowledge that they had a chance at something special.
How could this not lead to more? She affected him like no other woman ever had, made him want to take care of her, protect her.
But he knew he wasn’t going to change her mind. She’d decided against him before he’d even touched her that first time. So he brought her to a quick and powerful climax, somehow gratified that he could do it almost effortlessly, and decided that would be his goodbye.
Fastening his jeans, he left without a word, and this time he told himself he’d never give her the chance to reject him again.
* * *
When Cheyenne saw Eve’s number on her caller ID on Saturday morning, she couldn’t believe it. Eve had said she wouldn’t be able to call until she returned to the States, but there were still four more days of the cruise.
Although relieved and excited—it’d been a rough week without her best friend to help steady her—Cheyenne was also a little worried. Had something gone wrong?
Forgetting about the reason she’d been up late, tossing and turning, she scrambled to hit the talk button. “Hello?”
“Chey?”
“Eve! Where are you?”
“Martinique.”
An island in the Caribbean, one of their stops. “So how are you getting phone service?”
Eve had to be using her cell, or her number wouldn’t have shown up on Cheyenne’s screen.
“I decided to get an international plan.”
“Why would you do that? You’ll be home in a few days.”
“Because I wanted to talk to you.”
Cheyenne sat up. “Is everything okay?”
There was a brief silence. “It is on this end.”
“Everything’s fine here, too,” she said. And what wasn’t okay could wait. She didn’t want to ruin Eve’s trip. “My mother’s still fighting.”
“So I’ve heard.”
“How?” Cheyenne asked in surprise.
“Gail called the ship from L.A. yesterday. Can you believe that? She can track anyone down.”
“But…why would she? She couldn’t call when you got back?”
“No. She needed to reach me.”
“Because…”
“She had something to tell me about Joe.”
Cheyenne tightened her grip on the phone. “That’s good, then, right? He must’ve spoken to her about you.”
“He did, but it wasn’t what I was hoping he’d say.”
“What do you mean?” Cheyenne could hear the uncertainty in her own voice.
“Chey, stop pretending,” Eve said. “I know, okay? I know he wants to date you. And I know you turned him down because of me.”
Stunned at being so suddenly exposed, she tried to come up with something that would soften Joe’s rejection. “He just doesn’t realize how great you are.”
“But he realizes how great you are. And if you’re interested in him, too, I don’t want to stand in the way.”
How should she react? Should she continue to deny her feelings? Or finally tell the truth? She didn’t want to hurt Eve. “I’m sorry.”
“For…”
“For not telling you a long time ago.”
There was a slight pause. “So it’s true? You like him?”
She fell back on the pillows. “I wish I didn’t.”
“I can’t believe you sat there and encouraged me, even lent me your best dress to go out with him!”
“He’d never shown any interest in me. I figured you’d have a much better shot.”
“Why? That’s crazy! You obviously have no idea of your own appeal.”
“I don’t want to lose our friendship.”
“Silly, you won’t lose our friendship. You won’t lose anything. Go out with him. No need for us both to be deprived.” Eve attempted a laugh, but Cheyenne heard the strain in her voice and felt bad about it. She could tell this wasn’t easy.
“You’re being very generous, but I don’t think I could—”
“Go out with him, Chey!” Eve interrupted, her voice more strident. “Don’t miss this chance to see if someone as wonderful as Joe might be the right man for you.”
“That’d be too weird,” she argued. “You and I…we wouldn’t be able
to talk about him. And I’d feel like a slimeball if we ever ran into you.”
“We’ll get over that stuff, work around it.”
“What if we don’t? What if it changes our relationship?”
“If you think Joe means more to me than you do, you have no idea how much I care about you.”
That statement brought tears to Cheyenne’s eyes. “That helps.”
“It’s true.”
Cheyenne swallowed around the lump in her throat. “I have something to tell you.”
“What’s that?”
As the memory of Dylan pressing her against the wall last night came back to her yet again, Cheyenne curled onto her side. “I’ve been seeing Dylan Amos.”
Eve’s response was fast, loud and immediate. “You can’t be serious!”
She covered her head. “I’m afraid so.”
“What do you mean, you’ve been seeing him?”
“In truth—” she lowered her voice on the off chance that Presley was awake “—I’ve been sleeping with him.”
This met with shocked silence. “I’ve only been gone a week,” Eve said when she finally responded. “When did that happen?”
“The first time?”
A gasp. “How many times have you been with him?”
Cheyenne pressed her palm to one eye. “Four nights out of six.”
“God, that scares me to death! Are you using protection?”
“Yes.” Except for once, but she didn’t add that. She’d already counted the days, knew it wasn’t a dangerous time of the month.
“I can’t believe it.”
Cheyenne had expected Eve to be shocked. She’d complained about her sister hanging out with the Amoses for too long to get any other reaction. But now that she knew Dylan better, she also felt somewhat defensive of him. “He’s not as bad as you think.”
“Cheyenne, he’s not what you’re looking for. Don’t you remember him getting into fights all the time at school? Being kicked out? Being hauled off to jail for disorderly conduct or setting off illegal fireworks or resisting arrest?”
“Of course, but…he was a lot younger then. I get the impression he’s settled down.”
“Funny, I don’t get the same impression. He looks like he’s part of a biker gang.”
Cheyenne liked the way he looked—tattoos, scar and all. She figured that was part of the reason she couldn’t seem to refuse him. “You don’t think he’s handsome?”
“I think he’s dangerous. How did you two hook up in the first place?”
Scooting lower in the bed, Cheyenne pulled a pillow to her chest. “I ran into him in the park last Sunday.”
There was some noise in the background. It sounded as if Baxter or Noah was asking Eve for details on their conversation. “Wait till I get off,” she said.
“Don’t tell anyone!” Cheyenne cried. “What happened with Dylan is between us.”
“Of course. I’ll make up something. But now I’m even more convinced you should go out with Joe. He’s the kind of guy you need, Chey, not—” she lowered her voice “—not Dylan. Dylan will chew you up and spit you out.”
Cheyenne couldn’t remember when she’d seen Dylan with a woman. But until last weekend, she hadn’t paid that much attention to him, other than to lump him in with Aaron, who was so bad for Presley. “Dylan actually seems sort of…sensitive,” she admitted.
“Come on, don’t get mixed up with him. You’ve never wanted your sister to go over there. There has to be a reason. Maybe Joe can help you get out of this.”
Eve did seem to be relieved by that idea. But…what if Dylan’s reputation wasn’t the sum total of who he was? What if he’d changed?
Thinking of the desire that had left her helpless when they’d had sex at the inn, Cheyenne massaged her forehead. “But it’ll feel disloyal being with Joe, knowing you like him, too. I can’t do it.”
“Cheyenne, you’ve never had anything in your life worth hanging on to. I want you to have this.”
“I have you,” she said softly.
“And that won’t change,” Eve said. “I want you to make me a promise.”
Cheyenne knew where this was going, but she asked, anyway. “What kind of promise?”
“Stay away from Dylan. Don’t see him again.”
“Tell me Baxter and the others can’t hear you.”
“No, they’re dickering with a street vendor.”
“Good. Anyway, I don’t think Dylan does drugs or anything else that’s too bad. I’m beginning to wonder if he’s sort of taken the blame for everything his brothers have done.”
“You can’t be that generous, Chey. Your whole future could hinge on this decision. Please? Will you forget Dylan and go out with Joe? For me?”
Cheyenne wasn’t as excited as she thought she’d be by the prospect of dating Joe. That came as a surprise. What happened to all those angst-filled evenings when she’d passed him on the street and hoped he’d linger? Or when she’d waited outside Eve’s house just last Friday?
He was still the same guy.
Somehow she’d changed.
“I have your blessing?” she asked.
“Of course you have my blessing,” Eve replied.
She should be elated. So why was it Dylan’s face that appeared in her mind every time she imagined herself in a man’s arms? How had he replaced Joe in her fantasies so quickly?
“Chey?” Eve said. “You’re going to stay away from the Amoses, right?”
“Right.” She agreed because she’d come to the same conclusion. She had to be smart, choose wisely, or her life would never improve.
“And you’ll go out with Joe?”
“If that’s what you really want.”
“It is. Gail’s going to have him call and ask you to the Victorian Christmas celebration tomorrow night.”
“Okay.” She sat up and peered at her closet. “What should I wear?”
“It’ll be cold so…I’d go with your pea coat, furry boots and that knitted beanie. It looks great on you.”
“Good idea.” She sighed. “I wish you were here.”
“Me, too. I can’t believe you finally lost your virginity and I wasn’t around to hear about it.”
Cheyenne wasn’t sure it would’ve happened had Eve been home. Feeling so alone had made her vulnerable.
“So? What’d you think?” Eve asked, her tone taking on a positive note. “Was it good?”
Cheyenne smiled. “Dylan might have his issues, but…he’s definitely talented in bed.”
Eve laughed. “Somehow I don’t doubt it. From what I’ve seen of him, he’s got quite a body—and a wickedly sensual mouth. But a good body doesn’t necessarily equate to a good husband. You want a relationship that’ll give you something worth hanging on to, don’t you? You want a family.”
She definitely didn’t want a broken heart. “Eventually.”
“Then go to the Victorian Christmas celebration with Joe and see where it leads.”
Considering what she’d done, it probably wouldn’t lead anywhere. “Don’t you think I should wait a few weeks? I was just…intimate with Dylan.”
“Are you and Dylan together?”
“No!”
“Then forget about it. Sex means nothing to the Amos brothers.”
Cheyenne wasn’t convinced that was entirely accurate. Eve didn’t know them. But there was no point in arguing while they were on a long-distance call. Aware that their time was limited, Cheyenne felt pressure to let Eve go. She didn’t want her to wind up with a big phone bill. “But what about Joe’s perspective on it?” she asked. “Surely he wouldn’t want to go out with me if he knew I’d just slept with Dylan.”
“He has no claim on you yet. Just don’t see Dylan while you’re seeing Joe and it’s all good.”
Cheyenne didn’t feel comfortable with that. Sunday was too soon. But she supposed she might as well take the opportunity she’d been offered. Maybe Joe could help her forget Dylan. Apparently, she needed
something to make that happen because she wasn’t having any luck forgetting him on her own. “Okay, but I’m going to tell him. I have to be honest.”
“About Dylan?”
“Yes! It’s only fair.”
“No way! You can’t tell anyone about Dylan. What you’ve done is no one’s business but yours. Forget him and move on. So you’ve had a sexual relationship. Most women have had several by the time they’re thirty-one. Put it behind you. Maybe it was ill-timed, but it was…a fling, nothing more.”
She fidgeted with the edge of her blanket. “He wanted to give me a key to his house.”
“That’s not a commitment.”
It’d sort of felt like one—or at least, a step in that direction. It told her he wanted to continue seeing her. And that he wasn’t worried she might run into another of his love interests in the night.
“I have to go,” Eve said.
Cheyenne drew a deep breath. “I know. Have fun. Wish I was there.”
“Me, too. Although it sounds like you’ve been having more fun at home.”
“Stop already!” she said with a laugh.
Eve laughed with her. “I’m just so shocked!”
“Don’t make me sorry I told you.”
She was teasing and knew Eve could tell because she kept laughing. “I won’t.”
Chey said goodbye and almost hung up, then pulled the phone back to her ear when she realized Eve had one last piece of encouragement.
“Joe’s twice the man Dylan is. You’ll see.”
He certainly fit the profile of the perfect candidate. He was all she’d ever wanted.
But she was afraid that being with Dylan had changed her in some way, that now she wouldn’t be satisfied with anyone else.
17
Cheyenne had planned to go in to work for a couple of hours. Although he had no help, since Jacob was spending his Saturday at a friend’s house, Riley was there. But she’d overslept and, because of that, had decided to restructure her day. She didn’t really need to go to the inn. There was plenty of time to get ready for the grand reopening. And it was the holidays. With Christmas right around the corner, she had shopping and wrapping to do.
