The truth of the matter was...there was no guy who would ever be right for her. She was damaged goods in that department and she didn’t have the patience to try to sort out the broken parts just to see if she was capable of holding a decent relationship together. Ugh. Just the thought made her feel all twitchy inside.
“Catch you later, Otter!” She grasped her son’s hand and quickly walked away.
Otter, I’m doing you a favor.
Miranda would eat someone like Otter alive and spit out his bones. And she couldn’t bring herself to be that cruel.
She might play fast and loose with moral boundaries but she knew when the stakes were simply too high to ante up.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
JEREMIAH WAS MORE than glad when his meeting with the department heads came to a close. Administrative meetings were never his favorite part of the job, but it came with the paycheck, so he didn’t complain.
Stuart Olly, his immediate superior, came to him with a smile and shook his hand vigorously, almost painfully, and Jeremiah countered with a forceful squeeze of his own. Stuart grinned and nodded, pleased with Jeremiah’s understanding of the unspoken code of appropriate handshakes for men. “How’s the new office?” he asked. “Settling in all right? No one giving you trouble?”
“New office is great. My team is well seasoned and do their jobs without a lot of hand holding needed. I appreciate that in a team as it frees me to attend to other more pressing details.”
“Excellent. Well, not to speak badly of Virgil but he wasn’t exactly a go-getter, if you know what I mean. He preferred to keep his head down and simply do his job without anyone bothering him. However, I’d like to see you take the Homer office in new directions. No more running under the radar.”
“What did you have in mind?”
“I don’t know. Impress me.”
“Well, one of my team is tracking poachers who are possibly running a black-market poaching ring to sell bear parts illegally. She’s been asking for more resources but with the budget being as tight as it is...you can imagine how quickly her requests have been shot down.”
“Poaching...grim business and not particularly what I’d had in mind, but if she managed to catch these poachers, it could make for some good publicity.”
“Oh, are we looking for media-friendly stories to pitch to the local news?” Jeremiah asked, half joking, but when Stuart didn’t laugh, Jeremiah realized that his boss’s request to impress him had come with a specific set of requirements. “If we managed to catch the poachers, it would look good for the Department of Fish and Game,” he added cautiously. “But from what I’ve read in the reports, we’re dealing with a highly organized and sophisticated operation. It’s going to take more than just a few hours to wrap the case up with a nice pretty bow.”
Stuart smiled and rested his hand on Jeremiah’s shoulder. “Make it work. I know you will. I look forward to your progress report. Out of curiosity, who’s your lead investigator on the case?”
“Miranda Sinclair.”
Stuart’s easygoing expression faded into a worried scowl and Jeremiah wondered how Miranda had locked horns with the older man. “Is that a problem?” Jeremiah asked.
“She’s a loose cannon who doesn’t respect authority. It’s a wonder she hasn’t managed to lose her job yet. Virgil was too lenient on her. I hope you’ll get her in line more effectively than he did.”
“I don’t know her well but she seems a valuable asset. Everyone on my team raves about her tracking skills.”
“She’s fair in the field—not as good as her brother Trace, which is why she didn’t go into Search and Rescue same as him—but she’s got absolutely no respect for authority and she’s got no problem with cutting her nose to spite her face. Honestly, when she applied for the director position, I had to do a double take. I wasn’t sure if her application was meant to be a joke or if she was serious.”
“Why wouldn’t she be serious?” Jeremiah asked, mildly offended for Miranda’s sake. It appeared to Jeremiah that Stuart had a significant prejudice against Miranda and he’d like to know why. “She’s smart and capable. I’ve looked through her file and, yes, she’s passionate about certain subjects, but she’s a solid employee. She has her bachelor’s degree from University of Alaska and she’s motivated to see positive changes in her work environment. Forgive me if I seem out of line but...I prefer a passionate employee over one who is apathetic.”
Stuart regarded Jeremiah for a long moment, then said, “She’s a beautiful woman, no doubt about it. But keep your wits about you when it comes to Miranda Sinclair. She’s a man-eater. Don’t kid yourself about that.”
“I think you misunderstood my intent—”
“You wouldn’t be human if you didn’t notice what was right beneath your nose, but trust me when I say she’s not the kind of woman you take home to Mother. Just some friendly advice from someone who’s been burned by a beautiful woman in the past.”
Jeremiah couldn’t believe his superior was talking so freely about Miranda. Talk about playing fast and loose with the rules of professional conduct. Jeremiah fought to keep his voice calm and bury the agitation twisting his insides in a knot. His ire wasn’t solely because the man was talking about Miranda, he told himself. Jeremiah would’ve been concerned about Stuart talking disparagingly about any of his team, but the fact that it was Miranda did poke him a little harder than he wanted to admit. Don’t put your foot in your mouth over something that’s none of your business, he warned himself. “You don’t have anything to worry about. I don’t believe in interoffice dating,” he said firmly, choking on the hot words that wanted to spill in Miranda’s defense. “As long as she continues to be a good employee, I don’t care about her personal life.”
“Good man. I knew you were the right choice for that office,” Stuart said, oblivious to Jeremiah’s discomfort. He patted him on the shoulder again and winked. “Keep me posted on any new developments with the poaching angle. I have a reporter I can call who will do the story up right, if you know what I mean. Good press is important these days. Smart to cultivate those relationships.”
Jeremiah nodded and couldn’t wait to leave. And he’d thought he’d left behind an asshole of a boss in Wyoming. Seemed he’d simply traded one for another.
* * *
MIRANDA WAS STUDYING a biologist report on migration patterns of the black bear when Jeremiah returned. She was curious as to how the meeting went, seeing as it was his first official meeting of the brass. Virgil had always returned looking beat-up and worried. Miranda hustled into Jeremiah’s office, unable to stop herself. She wanted to know how he’d fared. “How’d it go?”
“Tell me about your relationship with Stuart Olly.”
Miranda was taken aback by the question. “What relationship?”
“Just curious. He seemed to have some opinions about you.”
Miranda bristled. “There is no relationship between me and Stuart Olly. What’d he say?”
Jeremiah seemed to think better of his line of questioning and dropped it. “Forget it. He gave me a soft go-ahead to pursue the investigation and the poaching as long as it doesn’t affect the bottom line. Seeing as I can’t hire anyone new to help, looks like you and I are going to be out in the field a bit.”
She nodded, still processing Jeremiah’s earlier comment. She shifted in discomfort, worrying that Stuart had shared personal biases against her for personal issues. For as big as Alaska was, sometimes the state felt too small for all the tongue wagging that went on about other people’s business. “Why the change of heart?” she asked, trying to refocus on the important details. “Virgil always said that Stuart was notoriously tightfisted with the budget.”
“Seems there’s a good angle to exploit in the media if we manage to catch the poachers.”
Ah. Made sense now. �
��Stuart loves being in front of the camera or quoted in the papers. Pardon my language but Stuart is a media whore.”
A short smile lifted the corners of his lips as if he agreed and a moment of camaraderie passed between them that felt good. “Well, maybe Stuart’s thirst for glory will play to our advantage. I say we should take whatever leg up we can find.”
“Agreed.” Miranda turned to head back to her desk.
“Hey, Miranda,” Jeremiah said, causing her to pause on her way out. “I’m sorry for mentioning anything about Stuart. And trust me when I say that whatever his opinion is, it doesn’t influence mine.”
Miranda smiled. “Thank you, Jeremiah. I appreciate that.” She could guess what Stuart had said about her as they had an unfortunate history that started way before he’d ever become part of Fish and Game in his current position. Let’s just say, it hadn’t ended well. She hated that Stuart had said anything at all to Jeremiah when her personal life had nothing to do with her work ethic. She graced Jeremiah with a smile and then returned to her office, troubled and buoyed by the conversation. She didn’t like the idea of Jeremiah knowing too much about her.
There were simply some parts of her life that she’d rather forget.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“AND FURTHERMORE, MS. SINCLAIR, Talen has been exhibiting some aggressive behavior that we find of concern.” Mrs. Higgens, the principal of Little Eagle Elementary School, pursed her lips on a pause as she regarded Miranda with the hard eyes of a raptor in spite of her advanced age. Mrs. Higgens had been around for a while and she had a memory like a steel trap. “You’ve done an admirable job raising Talen on your own, but considering the stock that Talen comes from—”
“Wait, what?” Miranda interrupted. “What do you mean the stock he comes from?”
“Well, if you recall, I remember what Johnny was like as a student and later as a young man. Sometimes that wildness is inborn.”
“With all due respect, Mrs. Higgens, I think you’re out of line. Johnny is not the issue, and furthermore, Talen is nothing like his father. I’m offended that you would even imply such a thing when Talen has never once had a behavioral problem before today. And furthermore, what’s being done about the other kids who were involved?”
“I cannot discuss the disciplinary details of another student with you as that’s confidential. However, I can say they are being disciplined as is appropriate.”
“I’m glad to hear that. I’d hate to think that my son is being singled out simply because of who his father was.”
“Of course,” Mrs. Higgens said with a mild sniff. “Now, the fact remains that Talen hit another child, and thus in accordance with our zero-tolerance policy, I must suspend him for three days. These will be unexcused absences and he will not be able to make up any lost homework.” Mrs. Higgens pushed a piece of paper across her desk toward Miranda. “Please sign here that you understand the punishment and the repercussions.”
Yeah, she understood. And she doubted either of the two boys involved were being as harshly dealt with but that was a fight for another day. “I appreciate your fair and equitable handling of the situation,” Miranda said with a false smile as she signed the paperwork. “Where is Talen now?”
“He’s waiting for you in the nurse’s office. You may sign him out as you go.”
Miranda dropped her smile and went to sign out her son. When she saw Talen, his face was tear-streaked and he looked miserable. Her heart broke at the sight of him and she wanted to rail at whoever had managed to get under her son’s skin enough to cause him to lash out in such an uncharacteristic manner. Her son wasn’t a troublemaker. He was sweet and easygoing, traits he hadn’t exactly gotten from her or Johnny but she’d been grateful just the same. She graced her son with a genuine smile and held out her hand. “Come on, buddy. Let’s get out of here. I think there’s a cheeseburger with your name on it. What do you say?”
Talen wiped at his nose and nodded. “I’m sorry, Mama.”
“No worries, buddy. We’ll talk about it over lunch.”
They climbed into the Range Rover, and as Miranda headed for their favorite diner, she broached the subject of the fight. “So what happened? Clue me in because I’m a little bewildered over this whole thing. Talen, you’re not a fighter as far as I know...did something change?” she asked, half joking. “Do I need to worry about you becoming the school-yard tough guy?”
“No, Mama.” Talen’s voice wavered but there was an edge to it that worried her. “I don’t want to talk about it, okay?”
“Okay,” she agreed against her better judgment as she maneuvered the Rover into a slushy parking spot. But she could only hold her tongue long enough to give their order to the waitress before she was touching on the subject again. “Here’s the thing, Talen.... I have to know why you got into a fight today. That’s so unlike you that I’m more than a little worried. Help me out, buddy. Tell me what happened. Please.”
Talen sighed and looked away with a shrug. “It’s boy stuff. You wouldn’t understand.”
Ouch. She pulled back, smarting from that one tiny statement. She’d known that phrase would likely come out of her son’s mouth at some point in his life but she’d figured it wouldn’t happen until at least the teenage years. Still, she wasn’t ready to concede just yet. “Are you sure about that? I grew up with two older brothers. I know quite a lot about boy stuff. Give me a try.”
Talen’s lips tightened into a thin line as if he were holding back a hot comment, or worse, tears. Then he stared her straight in the eye and said, “Garrett Pollard said that my daddy was a no-good criminal who died in prison from a disease you get from sex. And you were the one who gave him the disease, ’cause you’re a loose woman.”
Miranda pulled back in shock. What a vile thing for a child to say. She stared, unable to believe something so horrid was being said to her young son by another child, which only meant that the other kid had heard it from an adult. “So you punched Garrett for saying that stuff?” she asked. Talen nodded sullenly. Miranda was mad as hell but she managed a smile for her son. “Well, I guess Garrett should be careful about when and where he runs his mouth. I’d say you taught him a valuable life lesson.”
“You mean I’m not in trouble?”
“All right, I’m going to say this once, so pay attention, little man. I would never get mad at you for defending someone you love in a righteous battle. However, that’s not a get-out-of-jail-free card for every altercation because violence isn’t the answer in most cases. It takes a smarter man to use his words rather than his fists to get his point across. Understand?”
“I think so.” Talen paused, then asked, “Was my daddy a bad man?”
What a loaded question. She cringed inside, wishing she didn’t have to talk about Johnny at all, but her son deserved honesty for defending her honor in the only way his eight-year-old heart knew to do—by punching the lights out of a classmate. “Your dad was...troubled. He died in prison because he was serving time for drugs when another inmate attacked him with a homemade weapon. He did not have a disease of any sort. He got caught up with the wrong crowd and made some really bad choices. That’s all, buddy.” She reached across the table and grasped her son’s hands in her own. “Listen, however troubled your dad was, that has nothing to do with who you are as a person. You are good and kind and sweet and I’m proud to call you my son. Okay?”
Talen broke into a shy grin and her heart contracted with pure love for the boy. “Thanks, Mama.”
“Anytime.” She smiled and allowed him to pull his hands free because their food arrived, but as they enjoyed their lunch, Miranda’s enjoyment at spending time with her son was dampened by a small voice at the back of her head that worried her past actions were finally catching up to her, but not in the way she’d expected. She could defend herself without caring how others felt about her, but she c
ouldn’t fathom her son bearing the brunt of others’ censure because of something she’d done.
In the past she’d slept with a lot of people and hadn’t thought how her actions might affect her loved ones because she’d figured it was her business and no one else’s.
It killed her to think that Talen had had to defend her against such a nasty rumor. What else were people saying about her? Trace’s last admonishment came back to her as she slowly chewed her French fry. People were certainly talking about her. She’d never cared before, but now the knowledge gave her a hard pinch. If she were of a mind to change public perception, how would she even begin?
She supposed she could start by settling down.
Otter came to mind, and even as she felt zero interest in him sexually, she knew he was a decent man with a solid reputation around town as a good guy. He’d make a great father. But how fair was that to Otter that she would consider settling for a passionless relationship in exchange for stability and a veneer of respectability?
She hated herself for even considering such a thing but she’d do anything to protect her son—even if it meant reinventing herself in the eyes of an entire town.
* * *
JENNELLE WATCHED FROM the window as Zed traversed the yard, heading back to his shop, where he’d taken up permanent residence. She swallowed a sudden wash of bitter tears at the unfairness of it all and allowed the drape to fall softly back into place. My, how things had changed. She remembered a time when Zed couldn’t take his eyes from her, followed her like a puppy and gave her gifts of freshly picked wildflowers that were the same wild blue of her eyes.
She squeezed her eyes shut and plucked an old memory free from her locked box.
“I could teach you how to shoot a gun,” Zed offered, his boyish charm melting her heart even as she prepared to play coy. He was eighteen and everything she’d ever imagined wanting in a boy, but her girlfriend Stella told her she should never let a boy know right away that she liked him. And oh, goodness, gracious me, she liked him.
That Reckless Night Page 11
