The figure darted out and made a grab for my lollipop. His hand closed on empty air, at about the same moment my hand closed like a vise on his wrist. He gawked at me for half a second, then plunged his teeth into my wrist. The texture of my skin surprised him into staring up at me out of his big, round, blue eyes. My heart sank. What if this one was the real Skeeve under a spell? I hauled my heart up out of my boots and wrapped my other arm around his neck. We could figure that out later. The Mall guards marched in to take their prisoner.
The impostor turned into a tornado. He made as if to gouge out my eyes, then kicked for my crotch. It wasn't the oldest trick in the book, but it was on the same page. I let go of his wrist, grabbed his ankle, and picked him up over my head.
I forgot how good Skeeve's reactions were. He stretched out his free hand and snatched away a stun-pike from the advancing guard. He blasted the nearest two, knocking them unconscious, then turned it on me.
I ducked my head, but not fast enough to miss the entire blast. My head rang, and I suddenly discovered I was grasping nothing.
He leapfrogged over the short Flibberites and tore into the crowd. Massha flew right behind him, zigging when he zigged and zagging when he zagged.
"Outta my way!" I bellowed.
I had to enjoy the expressions on the faces of the onlookers when they heard my voice coming out of a child's body. For the ones who didn't get the message, I elbowed them aside. The guards poured into the breach behind me.
Chumley had been a little closer to the crowd, but he moved slower than we did. I kept my eye on Massha overhead. She must have been getting closer, because her hands stretched out in front of her as if to grab something. Closer. Closer. Then she stopped, looked right and left, and arrowed back to me.
"Got a problem, big guy," she informed me.
FOURTEEN
"What do you mean, you didn't see which way he went?" Moa repeated, for the hundredth time, as hordes of shoppers filed by on every side. "You were flying right over his head!"
"Yes," Massha asserted patiently, though I could tell she was embarrassed. "I almost had him, when he vanished, right there in front of Cartok's. Two strangers ran off from that point in exactly opposite directions. I didn't know which one to follow."
"He had a confederate in the crowd," I reasoned. "Wily. I might have used a tactic like that myself."
Moa glanced at me, then shook his head as if to clear it.
"Woofle, could you—" He made some passes with his hands.
Woofle performed a gesture or two. The others looked more comfortable when he finished, but a couple of passersby nearly jumped out of their skins at my apparent transformation.
"Thank you. I prefer to talk to you face-to-face. It's very disorienting."
"But effective," I pointed out. "It worked. We almost had him."
"But we didn't," Moa reminded me. "He got away clean, and we don't know any more than we did before."
"Nope," I corrected him. "We learned something very important: whoever they are, these impostors don't know what they're doing."
"Huh?" Chumley asked.
"What do you mean, Aahz?" Moa pressed. "They're just as much of a pain in the you-know-where as before. More, if we have to put up with them harassing innocent customers!"
"Nope," I corrected him. "They're less. We were wrong. We thought Rattila had employed a bunch of shapeshifters to gather power for him. I proved last night that the cards themselves make you change, not magikal talent. Those impostors, whoever they are, know how to use those cards, and they make use of some of the abilities of the people whose personalities they're stealing, like charm or strength, but nothing that doesn't rely on instinct. That's why I think they're not magicians. I'm betting none of them are. They don't know what they're doing. Otherwise, we wouldn't be able to get close to the Skeeves. The kid may not be the most experienced magician in the world, but he packs one hell of a magikal punch, and he knows how to fly as well as a bunch of other things that I taught him. None of them have an instinct for magik. We're lucky. I wouldn't be surprised if they were all mall-rats, or something else of a low order of evolution."
"Notta chance—" Parvattani scoffed. Then he glanced at Eskina. "I suppose-a it's possible," he conceded.
"It is likely," Eskina exclaimed, energetically. "Those would not challenge Rattila for his power."
"So what's our next move, Green Genius?" Massha asked, looking more enthusiastic than she had before.
"We could use some more firepower, but I don't want to involve anyone else," I thought out loud. "I don't want anyone else finding out that these crooks are making a fool of Skeeve."
"Woofle will help," Moa stated. Reluctantly, the financial Flibberite nodded.
I lifted a finger. "Good. That's one."
"Aahz! Hey, Aahz!"
A female voice calling my name attracted my attention. I glanced over my shoulder.
"And that's two," I added with satisfaction.
The owner of the voice bustled toward us in a rustle of green satin, Chloridia was another old friend, a major hunk of gorgeousness, who had a popular variety show on the Crystal Ball Network in her dimension, Kail.
Her four arms wound around me passionately, and she kissed the air within an inch of each of my cheeks. Her large purple eyes, all four of them, were lined in bright green shadow, and her lips were painted green to match. "Oh, Aahz, it's been so long!"
"Hey, baby," I purred, enjoying the greeting. "What are you doing here?"
"Shopping!" She laughed, but the sound was brittle. I eyed her.
"What's the problem?" I asked.
She let out a tinkle of laughter. "I just had a bill collector appear at the studio, interrupting my show, and demanding the most outrageous sum!"
"No kidding," I replied, with interest. "Hey, sweetie, let me introduce you to some friends of mine. Massha, Chumley, this is Chloridia, an old friend."
"Nice to meet you," Massha greeted her, with a hearty handshake.
I had to give her credit. The old, pre-Possiltum Massha might have exhibited some signs of insecurity, but this Massha, court magician and friend of queens, acted like she saw Chloridia as an equal. I was pleased.
"Any friend of Aahz's is a friend of mine," Chloridia assured her, liking what she saw, too. "And who's this big handsome fellow?"
Chumley lowered his eyes abashedly and scuffed his toe on the ground. "Big fan," he muttered.
"Really?" Chloridia exclaimed. She gave him a thorough hug, which embarrassed him all the more. "I am always happy to meet my fans! Thank you! Where do you watch my show?"
"Trollia."
"Fabulous! We're number one in our time slot across the ether in Trollia."
"This is Eskina," I added. The little Ratislavan received another air kiss. "And this is Moa."
For the first time the grand Kallian charm turned off. "We've met," she stated coldly.
I raised an eyebrow. "Credit card problems, huh?"
"Why, yes," my old friend replied, surprised. "How did you know?"
"Why in hell did you get a card?" I asked her, as we headed toward the next field of battle, a Skeeve impostor selling raffle tickets in Corridor J. I brought her up to date on what we were doing there and what had happened so far. "They're nothing but trouble."
"Oh, you know," Chloridia tossed off airily. "The same old reasons. Exclusivity. Status. It impresses people so much more than producing fireworks or a rodent out of my hat, which is so hard on one's clothes or the upholstery, depending on where you are. And," she admitted, with a coy smile, "laziness. It was lighter than carrying around a lot of gold. Our kind of purchases can be pretty expensive, as you know, and those bags of coins throw the line of one's clothes just all out of whack."
I agreed, having pride in my style of dress. "But it's easier. No paper trail back to you, no data miners dropping sale flyers on your doorstep."
Chloridia sighed. "It was a mistake, I know it now, but it just seemed so ...
fashionable when I whipped it out in a crowd. 'Charge it,' I'd say, and people would jump. It was better than the Felidian hotfoot. You know."
I grinned. We'd had some good times together, me and Chloridia, and a bunch of other magicians about the same age ... but I digress.
"So what's the trouble?"
"I started feeling ... funny one day. Do you know, I thought I saw myself coming out of a boutique, one that I was about to walk into. I put it off to foreknowledge. You know."
I whistled. "I sure do."
Once in a while clairvoyance happened to all of us. You tried not to get involved in it, since there were thousands of possible futures to follow any single event. The ones who started to believe in their own prescience ended up drunk or insane or with their own talk shows, none of which fates I wished for myself. Though, with rare regret for my own lost powers, I wouldn't have minded having to look out for flashes of intuition.
"... I went in anyway. I started looking through the racks. I found this absolutely divine magenta blouse, but my size wasn't there. I found one of those ever-hovering Djinni clerks and asked her to look for one in the back or size one to fit. She made a face. I was on the point of asking to speak with her manager when she told me that I had just been in, and made the exact same request, with which she had complied. Was I... having a little memory problem? She could show me my credit card receipt. And she did. That was when I went to the management." Chloridia glared at Moa. "They were sorry—they couldn't do anything. All they suggested was that I get in touch with the Bank of Zoorik people, have a new one issued, which would stop the old one. But it hadn't been stolen. I have very good spells to protect my valuables."
"I remember," I leered.
"Oh, Aahz!" She pushed me with all four hands. I stumbled. " 'But what about my face?' I asked that man." Chloridia threw a disgusted gesture in Moa's direction. The administrator looked abashed. " 'My face is my fortune.' He said they couldn't do anything about that. The
guards said they'd be happy to tell the stores not to permit credit purchases by anyone wearing my face, but where does that leave me?"
"Paying cash?" I suggested.
She waved it away.
"Get with the century, Aahz. You're more fun when you're not being sanctimonious."
"But now we know it wasn't clairvoyance. You really did see someone who looked like you. We're trying to catch the people responsible." I glanced at her speculatively. "Do you have time to pitch in? It's in your own interests."
"I'd love to help," the Kallian gushed. "If I can work with you. Or this big hunk of fuzzy maleness." She cuddled up to Chumley and put a couple of hands through his arm. "Not those unsympathetic Flibberites."
Massha raised an eyebrow. "Don't you know any male magicians, Aahz?"
"Yeah," I countered, a little defensively, "like Ore."
Chloridia recoiled in shock. "Cire! Is he here?"
"Same reason you are, apparently," I replied. "I'm hoping we can get him to help, just like you offered to."
"He's likely to be more hindrance than help, you know."
"I know," I growled.
"I'll do what I can," Chloridia promised, fanning her face with one of her free hands, "but I've been feeling so tired lately. Out of it. I get very distracted by sales, for example. When I hear that music ... I just forget where I am. I have to go to the sale!"
Eskina and I exchanged glances. "That is bad," she stated. "The mall-rats are wearing you, but you are wearing them, too."
Chloridia turned her nose up. "I never wear rat fur!"
'Ticket?" a voice asked, as a pasteboard was shoved practically up my nose. "Win a pegasus-drawn carriage!" "No, thanks," I muttered, scanning the crowd in
Corridor J for that familiar face, when my eyes met the owner of the voice.
It was the phony! We recognized each other at the same time. He darted away toward a wall, where a rope had been left for his convenience in making a quick escape. I got tangled in the many legs of a multijointed insectoid who had been waiting its turn when the impostor saw me.
"Massha!" I bellowed.
The Lady Magician of Possiltum rose up from the confab she had been sharing with Eskina and Chloridia and shot after the impostor. Chloridia, who didn't need a belt for the spell, flew behind, Eskina clinging to her neck. They reached his escape route before he did. Eskina wriggled out of Chloridia's grip and slid down the rope toward the impostor. Immediately, he dropped off and ducked into the crowd, dashing directly between a couple of Parvattani's finest, whom I was beginning to equate with the Keystone Kops. The Flibberites grabbed for each other, both getting in my way.
"That one?" Chloridia asked, pointing. "That Klahd?"
"He's not a Klahd, he's masquerading as one," I shouted.
The Kallian shook her head. "You've been slumming since we used to hang out, Aahz."
She shot after him effortlessly. A bubble of light began to form between her hands.
"Watch it," Eskina warned. 'They are tricky."
The impostor knew he was surrounded. I stalked him warily, hoping he wasn't going to be able to call on Skeeve's power, his downright astonishing luck, or, I had to admit it, his really surprising common sense. No, the fake continued to act like a scared animal. I congratulated myself. These weren't magicians, or even very smart beings. . But they were wily.
Chloridia's bubble arrowed after him. He dashed into the nearest storefront, and emerged with a smug look on his face. A wail sounded from inside the door. I glanced in as I went by. A very fat Imp was suspended in a blue bal-
loon like the jelly in a doughnut. He sputtered, waving his hands for help. Chloridia immediately alit to undo her sorcery. The rest of us kept after the fake.
Our quarry stayed low, always ducking in between other people so we couldn't just dive on him or pick him up. Eskina followed him gamely, leaping up to catch at his legs. She didn't have a chance of nailing him, but I admired her persistence. Massha doubled around in the air, hauling her big ring out.
Mall guards poured out of a doorway, pikes at the ready. The impostor saw them and windmilled his long arms as he slid to a halt, then started running back the other way. Massha doubled around in the air. She aimed a finger at the Skeeve.
I saw Chloridia coming out of the store with the Imp. His pink face was even pinker than normal, and he wore a sheepish grin. Another fan. I had to grin. Chloridia stopped to sign autographs for a few others who had recognized her.
"Hey, Chlory!" I yelled. "He's coming your way!"
Chloridia glanced up, and her four eyes widened. She threw up her hands, a spell growing between them.
"I've got him now!" Massha crowed.
A brown blob shot out of her ring. The Skeeve spotted Massha over his shoulder and dove over the head of a Gremlin waiting her turn for an autograph. Massha's net missed him by a mile. Instead of winding him up, it enveloped Chloridia, tying the star up with the cluster of adoring fans. Her spell misfired. A bolt of golden fire blasted up and illuminated the ceiling as it burst like fireworks, stunning three pigeons.
"Ha ha ha ha HA!" the phony cackled, derisively.
He jumped up on top of a freestanding stall and stuck his thumbs in his ears. Then he disappeared down behind the stall. By the time I got there, he was gone.
I stomped my way back to the storefront.
Chloridia, with her usual aplomb, severed the strands of the net binding her with one hand while signing autographs
and shaking hands with the other three. Massha alit forlornly beside me.
"He got away from me," I told Parvattani, who rushed over when he saw us.
The captain shook his head vigorously. "There is another-a sighting, very close to here in Atrium G. We must get there at once!" He set off at a clip. His men fell in behind him. We waited until Chloridia had paused for a few shutterbug portraits with her admirers and floated over to join us.
"I'm so sorry, Aahz," Massha apologized, her face red. "I d
on't know what's the matter with me. My gadgets are misfiring all over the place. Maybe I'm just too involved in this stupid case because it's all about the Boss."
"I doubt it," I replied, maybe more tersely than I intended. "You're good at what you do. You know it, and I know it."
"But I just blew a capture for the second time! Those ... creatures have really got me rattled."
Chloridia sailed closer and peered critically at Massha.
"It's not you, darling," Chloridia told her. "You're running some kind of overload. Are you taking some kind of new supplement, or something? An alternative-witchdoctor potion? Pep pills?"
"No," Massha fretted. "It's the same old me. I'm not eating or drinking anything different. It couldn't be these pants, could it?"
I glanced at the upturned seat of the rose-colored jeans with the gold pocket on the back. "Not a chance. No Djinn would waste a spell on something he was going to sell to Klahds."
"Thanks!" Massha sputtered.
I scowled. "You know what I mean. They're mass-produced."
"So are half the joke items on Deva!"
"True," I admitted. "But would you trust a magik item in the hands of a Klahd?"
"Well, not just any Klahd—"
"That is new," Eskina interrupted, pointing to one of the dozen or so bracelets on Massha's meaty arm.
"Yes, it is. I bought it yesterday. You certainly are observant," Massha praised her.
Eskina shrugged off the compliment. "It is my job. Is it new enough that the problems started after you bought it?"
"I—yes," Massha exclaimed, and enlightenment dawned on her face. "That's right, I never found out from the shop what it did. That's not like me."
"It might be making you misfire, darling," Chloridia pointed out.
Massha's face reddened. "I think one of the shapechangers waited on me. The store owner said she didn't work there. It's probably a magikal booby trap of some kind." She took off the bracelet and handed it to the first person she saw going the other way, a blue Dragonet female laden with bags and packages.
"Here! It'll look beautiful with your scales," Massha asserted.
MYTH-Taken Identity Page 14
