I lace my fingers behind my neck and run through the options. There aren’t many. I return my focus to Iggy. “Okay, fine. You stay and help, but you have to come along. With Cissy and me and Zeke. In the cab. To LaGuardia.”
Wow, does this ever have disaster written all over it.
Iggy starts skipping around the room, leaving a set of scorch-mark footprints on the wood floor. “Helping! Helping!”
While Iggy has his own fire-dance party, I contemplate how I can get him to LaGuardia without alerting every Razor Guard around. All of us still need a disguise, for that matter. Ethan will definitely be at the event. Since he’s thrax, he’ll see our tails in a heartbeat if we aren’t careful. Plus, he’ll probably have more thrax around him as well, and they’ll see our tails, too.
Nope. We definitely need disguises.
Iggy rushes for the door. “We go now.”
“Hold it there, buddy. I need to think a little first.” There must be some way to hide Iggy.
At that moment, the door whips open. Cissy and Zeke stride into the room. Well, they stride until they spy Iggy. At that point, they both stop in place. Cissy turns pale. Zeke falls over in a dead faint.
Crap. Just when I thought things were looking up.
Chapter Nineteen
After two hours—and a lot of explaining things to Cissy and Zeke—we’re finally ready to go to LaGuardia. Cissy didn’t want to bring Iggy, but Zeke was in full support. In my opinion, I think Zeke just wants to see Iggy blow things up, but whatever. As long as we leave for LaGuardia, I’m good.
Trouble is, we’re not leaving. And the problem isn’t Cissy and Zeke, either. Iggy is stalling.
“Iggy no like hat.” His muffled voice sounds from underneath the black Darth Vader helmet Cissy found to cover his head. “No, no, no.”
I kneel beside him. Like Cissy and Zeke, I’m wearing a floor-length trench coat to hide my tail, along with overlarge Terminator-style sunglasses to hide any kind of glow from my eyes.
I’ll be honest here. It’s not a great look.
“This is the thing, Iggy,” I explain. “The Event at LaGuardia is called Touch the Tech. It’s all about kids. There are going to be trucks and stuff everywhere, as well as face painting. But the biggest deal is the costume contest. We’ve been watching it on TV all day. Most of the kids there are in costumes. This is really the best disguise for you.”
Remember when I said Cissy could shop? Understatement of the week. All I said was that we would need disguises for Ethan’s Touch The Tech Event, and the girl came back with a ton of stuff in less than an hour, including this Darth Vader costume for Iggy, which he hates.
Full disclosure: Iggy was much more into the Jar Jar Binks costume, but some lines just can’t be crossed.
My little glowing buddy stomps his foot. “Iggy no like.”
“But you can’t walk around naked in public,” I explain. “And I can’t ask you to disappear.”
“If Iggy disappear. Iggy go to after-realms. Then Iggy no come back and Iggy wants to stay!” His little helmet rattles on his shoulders.
“Don’t worry, Iggy. We know you want to be here. That’s why you’re dressing up. This hides you from humans.” And as long as Iggy stays calm, he looks like a really pale kid. At least, I hope that’s the look.
“Wear it all, but no hat.” Iggy wraps his cape closer around him. It’s pretty clear that he digs the costume except for the headgear.
“The hat is the most important thing, Iggy.”
Zeke steps closer. Like me and Cissy, he’s wearing a long trench coat, baseball cap, and mega-sunglasses. In other words, we look like a trio of flashers. To make matters worse, today is a warm fall day, so there’s no actual reason for us to be wearing trench coats, except to hide our tails.
It’s like a conspiracy. Why couldn’t Touch The Tech be a mini con or something cool along those lines? That way, everyone could dress up, adults and kids alike? But no… We’ve watched the TV a dozen more times. The only people dressing up are children. There aren’t even adults dressed up in parent-child matching costumes, either. Which means that Iggy looks like an odd-yet-cute Darth Vader kid, while we three look like his terrifying relatives.
I stifle a sigh. There’s not much we can do about how we look at this point. Besides, this is New York. People will probably be fine with seeing three adults in trench coats dragging along a kid in a Darth Vader costume.
Maybe.
I swipe my hand down my face. This is such a bad idea. Unfortunately, it’s the best one we’ve got.
Zeke whips off his sunglasses in true fashion-model style. “Maybe we should leave Iggy here.”
“Iggy go!” His little body vibrates, and his skin starts to glow. Now, it looks like we’ve wrapped a kid-shaped lightbulb inside a Darth Vader suit. The eyes of the helmet start to glow in particular.
I slap on my most soothing voice. “You’re going, Iggy. I need you to calm down now.”
Cissy picks out a cell phone from her pocket and checks the screen. “Our limo has arrived. We need to move.”
I frown. “Limo? I thought we were trying to keep a low profile.”
Cissy gestures across our little group “Low profile? Us? Do you really think any cab driver in their right mind would take us anywhere? We look like a serial killer convention.”
There’s only one thing to say to that. “True. Thanks for ordering the limo, by the way.”
“Do you have your cell phone?”
I pat my pocket. “Yup.” Cissy got all of us cell phones so we could communicate at the Touch The Tech Event. After years of lusting after one of these devices, I’m a little overwhelmed by the actual item. I wanted something with clear buttons that say “dial” and “end.” What I got is a small computer with a screen and all these little colored app thingies that make no sense. Still, Cissy put a lot of work into this, so I shoot her a hearty thumbs-up. “Thanks for the cell phones, too.”
“You know how to use yours?” she asks.
“Absolutely.” That’s a total lie, but I’m feeling tapped out as it is. I just want to get to LaGuardia, find Lincoln, and go home. At this point, learning how to join the current millennium is not a good use of my time.
Zeke slides his sunglasses back on. “Let’s hit the road.”
Cissy and Zeke head toward the door. Iggy hangs back. I kneel down before him again. “What’s up, little dude?”
“Iggy scared. Iggy no walk and talk around humans. Only Great Scala.”
I wave to Cissy and Zeke. “You guys go ahead. I need to have a quick chat with Iggy.”
Zeke and Cissy march out the door, and within a few seconds, Iggy and I are alone again. “Look, bud.” I take care to use my most soothing voice. “I need your help. With being pregnant and all, I can’t do my usual battle moves.”
“Great Scala jump around and fight.”
“Normally, that’s what I do. But with the baby, I don’t want to do that. I can jump, but other people jump too. I can’t risk body blows. So, you have this great power—”
“Bigga boom.”
“That’s it. Or that’s part of it, anyway. Let’s see if we can’t work as a team and fight without blowing stuff up, okay?” I offer Iggy my hand. The little dude slides his palm onto mine. Instantly, a warm sense of peace moves through me. My eyes widen. This is the first time I’ve touched Iggy.
“Iggy like holding great Scala’s hand.”
“I like it, too.” A fluttering sensation starts deep in my belly. On reflex, my hand pops over my stomach. “The baby is moving.”
Iggy giggles. “Little Scala is happy.”
“Hey, do you know how long I’ll be pregnant?” Now’s not the time to ask, but it doesn’t look like later will be any better. I’m getting my info while I can.
“Yes,” says Iggy.
“Really?” My heart lightens. “How long?”
“Faster than a drakus, but shorter than a fitzercutter.”
Huh. I’m not e
ven going to try and translate that. “Got it, thanks.” I raise our joined hands. “Is this safe for the baby? Us holding hands?” Maybe I’m getting a head start on being a nervous mother, but no one really knows what the rules when a Great Scala and the humanoid version of her igni are running around.
Iggy nods. “Oh, yes. Fine, fine. Holding hands makes us all feel better. Like moving souls.”
I nod slowly. When I move spirits, the supernatural power of igni does seem to calm my soul. But then, I’m always in Purgatory when that happens. In other words, I’m in the after-realms. Perhaps holding hands on Earth is the closest we can get to that experience, which is why it feels so nice.
Whatever it is, I’m about to meander around an airport in the hopes of saving my husband from a psychopath. I’ll take any good vibes I can get my hands on. Literally.
“Are we good then, Iggy? Ready to go?”
“Just keep hold Iggy’s hand.”
“You got a deal on that one, bud.”
With that, I head off to save my husband with two friends and a little supernatural dude dressed like Darth Vader. It’s a plan that has “crap idea” written all over it.
It’s the only chance I’ve got.
Chapter Twenty
Cissy, Zeke, Iggy, and I all stand on the tarmac of LaGuardia Airport. The setting sun casts long shadows over the asphalt. Just like it showed on the news, the place has been completely shut down from its regular airport duties. Now, the runways are all packed with the latest in vehicular awesomeness from Hunter Enterprises.
There are Humvees.
Helicopters.
Tanks.
High-tech motorcycles.
A tent for CHUCK the computer.
There’s even a functioning warship held up by some huge black archy-things.
And last but not least, a great dirigible floats through the clouds.
All of this stuff is very black and badass looking. No doubt, it’s also totally permeated with black magic. I mean, how else do you get a freaking warship on the tarmac at LaGuardia?
My shoulders slump with worry. Sure, I knew that Ethan was saying how awesome his combo black magic and human tech was, but all he had to show in Antrum was a bunch of little models. I stare out over the long line of battle helicopters on a nearby runway.
This is so not good. If Ethan has this much battle equipment, surely he’s got something he wants to do with it. A dozen Razor Guards march by in two neat rows. I shiver, remembering how Ethan talked about a demon sighting followed by a joint rescue mission by the Razor Guards and Earls. It’s a good plan for a day, but somehow Ethan’s scheme feels larger than that. I nibble on my thumbnail, trying to piece it together.
The full picture doesn’t appear.
More Razor Guards march by, districting me. My senses go on high alert. Whatever Ethan is planning, he certainly has the manpower to act on it. This place is lousy with equipment and guards.
Yipes. Getting out of here alive with Lincoln just got a lot more complicated.
Iggy tugs on my hand. “All the humans stare. Iggy no like.”
I can’t blame the little guy for feeling uncomfortable. The runways are not only packed with tech, they are also filled with humans. And even though this is New York, the four of us do look mighty shady.
I motion Cissy and Zeke closer. “Look, we need to break up and look for that portal to Lincoln. It will be someplace large enough to hide a secret lab…or small enough to be the magical entrance to one.” On the limo ride over, I updated Cissy and Zeke about everything I discovered with Iggy.
“Check,” says Zeke. “I’ll take the helicopters and Humvees.”
“And I’ll scan the tanks and the computer tent,” adds Cissy. “I’d love to see what I can find in CHUCK.”
“Who?” asks Zeke. For the record, Zeke is not an envy demon, but if he were? His eyes would be lighting up right now.
“CHUCK is a computer,” I explain. “It holds all the research data, and I’m sure a ton of other stuff that humans need to know about Hunter Enterprises. If Cissy could expose Ethan for who he really is, that might make it easier for us to escape.”
Zeke leans in to kiss Cissy on the tip of her nose. “That’s my brilliant girl.”
I scan the tarmac and frown. Cissy and Zeke are pretty much covering most of the good tech. “What are Iggy and I doing then?”
Zeke gestures behind me. “You two can check out the minivan display.”
“Minivans? There are minivans?” It doesn’t seem possible. I’d peg Ethan as high-tech badass kind of guy. Minivans aren’t really that kind of thing. They’re more of a soccer mom kind of deal. Like what I’m pulling to be someday. Only, you know, supernatural and ruling everything.
Wow, my life is strange.
I slowly turn about—it’s not easy to move quickly, what with the heavy crowd and Iggy’s death-grip on my palm—and then, I see it. Line after line of minivans, all of them in sweet pastel colors. A large sign above them reads: “The softer side of Hunter Enterprises.”
To add insult to injury, the minivan section is also right by the port-a-potty area. I look longingly over to the helicopters. Normally, I’d rush right over there no matter what Cissy and Zeke said. But I’m planning for two now. The minivan section is indeed safer. “I’ll go check them out, no problem.”
Cissy’s brows lift. “I thought you’d fight me harder on that one.”
I force on a smile. “I’m trying to be mature.”
“I’m very proud of you, Myla-la.”
I give her a thumbs-up. “Let’s start exploring.”
Cissy raises her pointer finger. “But I need to make sure you can use your phone first.” Cissy had started a tutorial in the limo, but it wasn’t going anywhere, mostly because it’s hard enough to learn technology when you can use both hands. Iggy hasn’t let go of mine since the hotel suite.
“Look, everything will be fine. You call me. I push the button. We talk. You explained it really well on the ride over.” I shoot a glance at the crowd. Six human police officers are making a beeline toward us. “The law’s heading our way. We really need to vamoose.”
Cissy adjusts her sunglasses with trembling hands. “Okay, good luck.” She and Zeke head off to the cool parts of the Touch The Tech Event. Meanwhile, I drag Iggy off to the dreaded minivan display. We aren’t a few yards into the rows of vans when I notice something. Three things, actually.
First of all, it’s a lot less crowded in the minivan section of the tarmac.
Second, the cops have stopped following me and are now tailing Cissy and Zeke.
And third, Ethan is hanging out right in the minivan area, along with all the Earls from the Summit meeting in the Chamber of Reflection. The thrax nobility are all wearing blue jeans with actual ironed creases down the front, along with black Hunter Enterprises long-sleeve shirts and super-white sneakers. Some stare wide-eyed at the minivans. Others lovingly pat down the fabric of their dark shirts. I’d guess it’s a thrill to wear cotton when you spend your life either in chainmail or body armor. Lincoln is one of the few thrax I know who dresses like a regular dude on his days off.
My throat tightens. My Lincoln.
I count the Earls of Kamal, Striga, Acca, and Horus, plus a few of the minor houses. That’s the same group from the Summit, all right. They stroll down the last aisle of minivans, the one that’s right across from the port-a-potties. It’s the best sight I’ve seen since this whole disaster started.
I’m getting closer to Lincoln. I know it.
While the Earls make their way down the aisle, Iggy and I try our best to follow without looking obvious. It helps that the minivans are all nice and block-shaped, so they provide good cover for sneaking around. Iggy and I crouch behind one that’s especially large and pastel pink.
“Iggy hide good?” he asks.
“Yes,” I whisper. “You’re doing great. Now, we need to see where Ethan and the Earls go.”
At last, Ethan’s little g
roup gets to the end of the aisle, whereupon they start lurking in the space between a sky-blue minivan and the final port-a-potty. Ethan speaks to the Earls with grand hand gestures. I can’t hear what he’s saying, but I can imagine it well enough: “Move to the Earth’s surface, and it will be nothing but port-a-potties, minivans, and sneakers, twenty-four-seven.”
Jerk.
Whatever Ethan’s speech is, the Earls watch him with wide-eyed attention. After a minute or so, Ethan steps into the last port-a-potty in the line.
My mouth falls open. Say what? Ethan is taking a bio break. Really?
Another long minute ticks by. I stifle the urge to groan. When this whole disaster began, I imagined myself as a secret agent, fighting crime and looking badass as I leapt across Earthbound rooftops and rescued my Lincoln. I’d even pictured myself having a new badass sword for the occasion.
That’s not exactly how things have turned out.
Instead of rooftops and katanas, I’m crouched behind a pink minivan with an alien dressed like a little Darth Vader, waiting for Ethan to do his business.
Welcome to my life.
Finally, the port-a-potty door swings open. But instead of Ethan walking out, another Earl steps in. And another. And another.
Whoa.
Now, I’ve never actually been in a port-a-potty myself, but the dimensions are pretty obvious. With a space that small, it could never fit Ethan and all those Earls inside. It must go somewhere else. My heart rate skyrockets.
A portal.
That black ledger talked about hidden magical doors at LaGuardia. Where better place to stash one than in a port-a-potty?
It’s so stupid it’s brilliant.
Once everyone has disappeared into the port-a-potty, I force myself to wait a full minute. It isn’t easy. After I’ve given us enough time not to look too obvious, I give Iggy’s palm a squeeze. “Let’s go.”
“Iggy help.”
“You know it.”
Iggy and I make a beeline for the last port-a-potty, which is a major no-no in a crowd-type situation. People instantly get the vibe that something special is going on and—whammo—a line forms before my port-a-potty. If you really want to sneak in somewhere, you’re best off nonchalantly sidling over.
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