“Three fucking weeks without the taste of you on my tongue, baby. Three. Fucking. Weeks. I’m about to go out of my damn mind.” He growled as he lifted and hooked one of my knees around his hip, to grind into my core.
“Oh God. Caleb.” I moaned helplessly as he ground even harder into me.
“You calling my name as you come.” he whispered in my ear as one of his hands groped at my breasts and started to squeeze the thigh wrapped around him “I’ve never missed a sound so much. Watching your eyes light up as you come under me. You miss me too, Angel?” he grunted as I thrust my jean covered pussy up to meet his jean covered cock.
“Yes” I whispered before he covered my mouth with his in yet another possessive kiss that intoxicated me.
I was about two seconds away from saying ‘Fuck It’ and suggesting that we take our little rendezvous upstairs.
“Hey do you guys want more popcorn, because I’ve-” Niki froze as she entered the kitchen and saw us entwined. Her face flushed a bright red, which I would have found funny if I wasn’t currently having issues of my own “Shit. So sorry. Please do continue.” She blurted out as she spun on her heel and sped out of the kitchen.
Caleb chuckled against my neck “Damn cock-blocking siblings. Now… where were we?” he said as his hands and lips resumed their mind-numbingly, amazing exploits on my body.
“No.” I panted, summoning up every bit of will power I had left, as I pushed him away “Stop Caleb. Please. We can’t do this.”
At my words his body slumped against mine dejectedly. “Shit.” I felt him take a deep breath to try to compose himself, before he pushed of from the cabinet and turned his back to me, walking away as he rubbed his hand over the back of his neck.
“I’m sorry.” I muttered barely audible as he walked away.
“Don’t. The only thing that could make this worse right now, is you apologising. There shouldn’t even be a need for you to be apologising. This is all such fuckin’ nonsense, Liya.” he ranted, getting angrier with each word.
I couldn’t bring myself to meet his burning gaze, so just stared at the tiled flooring, trying to remember exactly why I wasn’t rolling around my bed naked with this man.
“You can’t even look at me now. Really? You’re crushing me. Do you even fucking care?” he said in a voice that sounded so hollow, my heart broke at the knowledge that it was me making him sound that way.
I stopped myself before I could apologise again. Instead I felt myself start to get irrationally angry; my go to response when I felt like I was backed into a corner. “I’m not some heartless bitch, Caleb. But, for fuck’s sake, I pretty much came with a warning label. I told you that I didn’t want to date.”
I laughed coldly “You knew I was messed up, but you still chased me. You thought your love would be enough, hell, even I thought if anyone could be enough to crack through my brick wall of baggage it would be you. Apparently not. I’m too screwed up. God, I wish I wasn’t. I wish I knew how to not be. I wish I could be what you deserved. See what I mean about me causing pain. We’re not even together and I’m still managing to hurt you.”
I looked up as he was opening his mouth to respond. I couldn’t have him speak, I just couldn’t.
“I bought a ticket.” I said and my heart broke a little more at the look on his face “I’m going to leave in April. We both got too caught up in this; putting distance between us is the only way I know how to get over you.” I stopped talking and looked back down at the floor “And it makes it easier for you to get over me too.”
There was a long excruciating silence between us, before Caleb finally spoke again.
“You think it’s going to be that easy for me to get over you? Or for you to just forget about me. No Liya. There’s a reason why both of us don’t feel right when we aren’t together. Because you’re mine and I’m yours, baby. Without the other, we aren’t complete. What are the chances of two people from thousands of miles away colliding like we did and it feeling real from the first kiss? I don’t take this shit lightly when I say we’re meant to be together.”
My breath caught in my chest, I needed him to stop talking, but he kept on going.
“It’s not just me you’re running away from by leaving. You’re running away from a whole life you’ve created here; from what you’ve told me, you were living half a life back in London, not letting anyone in apart from Niki. You have friends and family here, people you’ve actually let yourself care about. You adore my family babe, I see it in your eyes when you’re with them, and they love you too. You’d be breaking Aunt Deb’s heart by going.”
“I’m no saint baby. I’ve been with enough women to know that this between us is the real deal. If you don’t believe it, that’s fine. I’ll believe it enough for the both of us. Trust me when I say, you can try to push me away all you want, but I’m still not giving up. I won’t be totally satisfied until I’ve got a ring on your finger and our baby growing inside you, Liya. So, you can get the idea of us being over out of your beautiful head, Angel.”
Caleb strode over to me, cupped a hand to the back of my neck and pressed a searing kiss to my mouth. “I’m gonna go babe. Think about what I said.”
Like I would be able to think about anything else after that speech…
As he walked out of the kitchen I felt my legs get weak, sagging against the counter near the sink, I tried to hold back the tears and failed miserably.
------------------------------
When Niki heard the door close I heard her come back into the kitchen and gasp when she saw me sobbing. I found myself wrapped in her arms. “Liya? Do you want to talk?” she asked softly.
Feeling my temper rising amidst the tears, I yanked myself out of her grasp “How could you do that to me? Invite him over like that? You know I was trying to stay away from him! You’re my sister. You’re supposed to be on my side! And I know you’ve been telling him my daily whereabouts like some little spy!”
Niki’s eyes narrowed on me “I’m sorry Liya, I wasn’t aware we were back in kindergarten and I had to choose between friends who were ‘not-friending’ each other. And yes, I will admit my part in his mission to get you back. His points are solid and yours are stupid, so I regret absolutely nothing. Out of curiosity, were you planning on telling me that you were leaving in April? Or would I have just come home one day to find an empty house?” I could see her getting angrier and my own temper cooled.
“I’m sorry. Please don’t be mad at me. After the mess I’ve made of everything, I can’t have you mad at me too.” I sniffled as I felt more tears build again.
Niki sighed, went to the freezer and pulled out a tub of vanilla ice-cream, then went to a cupboard and began pulling out different packs of cookies.
Taking me by the hand, she grabbed a couple of spoons from a drawer and dragged me back into the living room where The Goonies were being reunited with their families. She switched off the television, opened the tub and handed me a spoon.
“Really a sob fest followed by junk food?” I asked scooping a huge spoonful of vanilla ice-cream and spreading it on a cookie.
“It’s a tried and tested cliché. Don’t question it.” Niki nibbled along the edge of her cookie “Okay sister, start talking, or I’ll start digging.”
“There’s not much to-” I stopped as Niki made a buzzer noise “I’m sorry player, wrong answer. Try again.”
I managed a small laugh, despite how crappy I was feeling. I didn’t feel up for talking so just shrugged in her direction.
“Okay. I’ll talk and you just listen then, jump in and tell me if I’m wrong at any point. Life’s dealt you a pretty crappy hand thus far, you tried to remain optimistic but eventually it wore you down. Now finally after years, you have a taste of happiness again. You let yourself go and began actually living again and then you had a harsh reminder that we are human and that shit happens, but instead of just taking it on the chin, you crawl back to the rock you’ve been hiding under all these years a
nd bring up the walls you had begun to take down a little. How am I doing so far?”
I glared at my sister who was in the middle of spooning ice-cream between two cookies. “Pot have you met kettle?” I asked taking the cookie ice-cream sandwich from her.
“Ah. No see, there’s the difference. I don’t let other people in because I’m shy and insecure. You don’t let them in because you’re afraid of dealing with emotions. You walk around with all this pointless guilt from Mama and Daddy’s deaths. They weren’t your fault. Never once have I ever blamed you, you put that all on yourself. They never wanted us to follow in their footsteps; all they ever wanted was for us to be happy. You think they wouldn’t be proud of the person you’ve become Liya? That’s bullshit.” she wiped away a tear.
“ And all this nonsense about you being cursed. You told me you loved me a long time ago, and I’m still around.” she sighed sadly as she looked at me.
“You can go to Oxford if you want, pursue this life-plan that isn’t actually what you want to do. When you finish studying and you still feel like you’re searching for something, know that it’s what you had right here, right now. I wasn’t lying at Thanksgiving when I said I believe Mama and Daddy brought us here for a specific reason. We got secluded from the rest of the world, you and me. Living in our own little bubble. Too afraid to let anyone else in, too afraid to let each other go. It’s not healthy, is it?” she said softly, taking an even breath. “Maybe we both have to learn how to be braver.”
Chapter 30
Maliya
After an emotional night, all I wanted to do was curl up on the sofa, eat cereal and watch bad television in my pyjamas, so when the doorbell rang I groaned and got up reluctantly from the perfect position I was nestled in to go and answer the door, carrying my cereal bowl with me.
My mouth dropped open in shock when I saw Nate Jameson stood on the other side of the door. In the time that Caleb and I had been together, I could probably count on one hand the number of times he had actually spoken to me. For Nate to be stood on the other side of my door at 9 o’clock in the morning, my heart sunk and I wondered if he had come to be the bearer of bad news.
“Nate? What’s wrong? Is someone hurt?” I asked slightly alarmed.
“No. Everyone is fine. Can I come in?” he said gruffly. Nodding, I stepped aside to let him in.
“Thanks. You look tired.” Nate observed bluntly.
I blinked up at him, “Thanks Nate, when I woke up this morning that was the look I was going for.”
“Can we talk, real quick? You’re not working today, right?” he asked taking me my purple unicorn patterned pyjamas and dishevelled appearance.
“What gave it away?” I asked jokingly. When Nate continued to stare at me mutely, I looked at my bowl of cereal that was rapidly losing its crunch. “You want some cereal?” I offered in an effort to fill the silence.
“Sure.” he said with a shrug and took off his black jacket as he followed me into the kitchen. I took down several boxes and put them on the small table of the breakfast nook in the corner of the kitchen.
I watched amused as he went and got the milk from the fridge and opened cupboards and drawers until he found a bowl and spoon.
Apparently it doesn’t take any of the Jamesons long to make themselves at home here.
As he sat down at the table and poured himself a bowl of Cheerios (ironic choice of cereal for a man who always came across as grumpy) I sat across from him, topping up my own bowl with more Frosties.
He started eating wordlessly while I watched him for a while; I noticed despite having different fathers, him and Caleb had the same jawline and high cheekbones.
“Nate. It isn’t that I’m not enjoying this silent little breakfast date, but do you maybe want to tell me why you’re here?” I queried as I spooned more of the sugary goodness into my mouth.
“I refused to partake when my family lost their damn minds and followed you about the whole fuckin town, like a bunch of insane stalkers.” he said and then stopped abruptly, tipping more cereal into his bowl.
“Okay… I appreciate that. And?” I prompted him to continue.
Still not looking at me, he asked gruffly “Caleb ever tell you about our mother?”
I stiffened slightly as I watched Nate continue to shovel cereal into his mouth.
Oh. It’s going to be one of those kinds of conversations… Great, not awkward at all.
“Um. A little but not much.” I said vaguely as I played with the cereal in my bowl, having lost my appetite.
“She was a shit mom for the most part. All of us had to grow up pretty fucking fast. It’s amazing we’re not all completely screwed up really.” He finished the cereal in his bowl and pulled my half-full bowl over to him and began eating that too.
“You ask any of my brothers or sister, they’ll say I raised them. I may have tried my best to put food on the table, keep them clean, and make sure they got to school on time, but Caleb, he was the heart of our family. I provided all the physical stuff, but when they needed a shoulder to cry on, or someone to talk to, or help with their homework; that was all Caleb. He was the glue that held us together before Debbie and Jeremy showed up.”
My heart started squeezing uncomfortably in my chest again. “My brother is a good man. You’re right for him; you make him happy, Liya. He was always the ready to settle down type, he was just looking for his perfect woman and he found her when she ran to help him when he got knocked on his ass trying to save some kid.”
He shook a little more cereal into the milk in the bowl. “I ran a background check on you. You’ve been through some shit too, I get that must’ve cause you to have some issues with people. I think we’re a lot alike, you and me. The older sibling, who had to grow up real quick, and always feels like they have to protect the younger ones, no matter how old they get.”
I nodded my head mutely, even though Nate was still not looking directly at me.
He finished his cereal and got up from the table, walked over to the sink with both bowls and began to wash them as he kept talking.
“Seeing my brother come home yesterday looking so fucking broken, with nothing I could do about it… that killed me Liya. What would you do if someone hurt Niki that way?” he asked as he placed the bowl on the dish rack next to the sink.
My felt my eyes water again, as I knew that he was right. I would kill anyone who made my little sister hurt the way I had done to Caleb.
I looked up as Nate picked up a striped hand towel to dry his hands. “I’m not here to guilt you into taking him back” his gruff tone softened slightly as he came to kneel in front of me, cupping my face so I looked at him “Just… think about it. I’m just a guy who really liked seeing his brother happy with a good woman who deserved him. Please don’t hurt my brother anymore Liya. He loves you.” With that, Nate pressed a kiss to my forehead, got up and walked out of the house as I remained sat at the breakfast nook, in stunned disbelief, trying to process everything that Nate had just said.
Wait. Did he say he ran a background check on me?!
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Caleb
“Hey. We never got to talk about what’s going on with you, man.” I said to Mik as we were sat down next to him at the table.
He shrugged vaguely “It’s nothing Caleb.”
I ran a concerned gaze over him “You sure, Mik?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. Seriously.” He gave me a brief smile and stood up from the table, walking to the kitchen to fix himself a plate.
I leant back in my chair, and watched Mik walk away, not believing a word of what he had just said.
We were all gathered around the table for lunch. Vinny had cooked some pasta dish that smelled awesome. I had to hand it to him; he may act and talk like a bonehead at times, but the man sure could cook.
Despite the tempting smells coming from the food, I didn’t have much of an appetite.
“What’s up Lieutenant? My ma’s penne all-arrab
biata not to your liking?” Vinny asked as he dunked a slice of garlic bread into the rich, spicy tomato sauce.
“Nah, it’s great. Just not hungry.”
“Ahh I see. This to do with your lady-friend problems?” Vinny asked as Jenn smacked the back of his head. “HEY! That action makes this a hostile workplace environment, Ms. Watson. I could report you to HR. Unless you wanna find a different way to work out our differences.” Vinny said an exaggerated wink.
“I’m still a lesbian since the last time you hit on me unsuccessfully, dickwad.” Jenn said rolling her eyes at him before looking at me concerned “You okay, Caleb?”
I sighed, not wanting to get into my relationship issues with everyone at work. “Yep. I’m fine.”
Dre snorted over the large mound of food on his plate “Tell the truth or learn to lie better Cal. You’ve been looking so fuckin depressed lately I almost agreed with D’Angelo when he suggested we blindfold you, shove you in the back of a truck and take you to a strip club.”
Falling Completely (Starling Falls #1) Page 23
