by BWWM Club
“Mrs. Willows, I am sorry. I am running a little late for my meeting.” She had donned her tan cashmere coat because it had been chilly when she went out earlier.
“I saw you going out this morning and I wanted you to pick up some fresh milk for me,” the woman said apologetically. “I am afraid I overslept this morning because I was up a bit late last night doing some painting.” Kym felt a moment of relief on hearing that she had slept late and therefore had not seen Julian leave this morning.
“I will pick them up on the way back.” She assured her before getting in the car.
*****
“You look different,” were the first words out of Sylvia’s mouth as soon as she stepped inside her office. The publishing house was located a little distance from where she lived and it had taken her an hour to get there and all the time in the car she had been expecting to hear from Julian so by the time she reached the publishing house she was a mass of nerves.
“No I don’t; it’s your imagination.” Kym took a seat in front of the woman’s crowded desk and wondered as she always did how she managed to get any work done.
“I am sure it’s not because you are the one with the imagination.” The woman continued to look at her closely, her red painted lips pursed in concentration. Kym felt as if she was under a microscope or in the principal’s office.
“Are we having this meeting or not?” she asked the woman coolly.
“Always in a hurry,” Sylvia said shaking her bottled blonde curls. She had a red silk blouse that did not quite fit her very ample bosom very well and the make-up was heavy on her florid face.
“I made some changes to chapter two,” she saw the expression on the young woman’s face and said hurriedly. “Just something slight darling,” she assured her. “I think Katherine should have a heated argument with Tony and leave the room in a blaze of anger.”
Kym studied the changes and made some of her own passing them to Sylvia. “Excellent darling,” the woman said with a pleased smile. “I also have your royalty check for the month right here.” She passed an envelope to Kym. “Open it,” she urged.
Kym did so and her eyes widened as she saw the amount of zeroes there. “What happened?”
“An increase in sales darling.” Sylvia told her with a smile. “There is one tiny problem though,”
“What is it?” Kym asked dragging her eyes away from the check in her hand.
“Your readers are clamoring for your story.”
“What do you mean my story?” Kym looked at her puzzled.
“You don’t seem to have an active love life and yet you are writing romance novels that sizzle the pages of your book. People want to know that you have at least a man that is servicing you on a regular basis.”
Kym grimaced at her choice of words. “That’s none of their damned business.”
“We both know that’s not true.” Sylvia told her mildly. “You are an exceptionally beautiful woman who happens to write some of the best love scenes I have ever read, they want to know that the inspiration is not plucked from thin air.”
“So my imagination as a writer does not count for anything?” she asked heatedly.
“Of course it does darling, but it’s not enough. They need to know that a man is in the picture as well.” Sylvia told her. “You are a public figure and therefore your business is open to all and sundry and your readers want to know that the person they admire so much is also real and capable of those very feeling she portrays in her books. Get yourself a man honey and make those pages sizzle even more.”
*****
Julian let the meeting wash over him without paying any attention to what they were saying. He had not lied to her when he had told her he had meetings to attend. He had done the status report for the building he had seen and was interested in and they had discussed it at the board level.
He was not doing well. He had picked up the phone to call her several times but he had not done so, he had a lot of thinking to do. He had made love to her over and over again and he had found that the more he had her, the more he wanted her. She was under his skin and in his blood and he was not used to a woman having so much power over him. He felt trapped and scared and what was worse he was falling in love with her!
*****
Kym felt the anger gathering inside her and festering. She had left the publishing house with a deceptive calmness about her and had climbed inside her car and closed the door against the cold wind whipping at her coat. It had rained last night and the water was still settled on the pavement.
He still had not called her and she felt the bitter disappointment going through her. He had slept with her and was done with her and she had allowed him to do so. She had become another notch on his belt and she had sworn that she would never be.
She pushed the button to start the car and drove off determined not to cry, she bit her lip and concentrated on the road.
*****
She had a late lunch with the girls. Gabrielle was just coming out of court and Marla had just finished dropping off some outfits she had for a store downtown so they met in a fast food restaurant.
Kym ordered a small salad and fruit punch while her friends ordered fried chicken and coleslaw. “On a diet?” Marla asked her tapered brows raised in question.
“No appetite,” Kym responded. “I slept with Julian last night.” She added abruptly. “Not that we did much sleeping.”
“Girl, that’s wonderful!” Gabrielle exclaimed biting into her succulent chicken.
“Finally, this calls for a toast.” Marla said with a grin.
“He has not called me since.” She told them, her expression woebegone.
“The man just left this morning, give him some time.” Marla told her.
“He usually calls me at least three times a day to check up on me and now that we have progressed to the next stage he has not done so. What does that say?”
“That maybe he is busy and has not gotten around to doing so yet?” Gabrielle suggested.
“I don’t believe that,” Kym said shaking her head. “No matter how busy he was in the past he always called and now when I have given him you know what; I do not hear from him.”
“You know honey, I am going to ask you one question,” Gabrielle said. “Was it good?”
“It was mind blowing good.” Kym admitted crunching on her salad.
“It works both ways. You had pleasure in the highest form and you enjoyed each other’s company immensely. If he does not call you back then you look back on what you shared with a smile and move on knowing that you had a grand experience.”
“Easy for you to say,” Kym muttered.
“It’s not and I have reached a point in my life where I am not going to get hung up on the pressure of expecting to be called after I have been with a man, it calls of too much heartbreak and complications.”
*****
She picked up several cartons of milk on her way back home for Mrs. Willows and decided to stay a little bit after dropping them off.
“How about some of my famous pot pie?” She asked as soon as Kym came inside the warm and cozy living room.
“You know I cannot say no to your cooking,” she smiled and followed her to the kitchen.
It was a little after five and she had given up hearing from Julian. Gabrielle was right; it was just going to be a very pleasant memory for her.
Mrs. Willows put the steaming plate in front of her and Kym sniffed the steam rising from it appreciatively. “Mom tried to teach me the art of cooking but I was always wrapped up in some book or the other and never willing to learn. One Thanksgiving I tried to bake the turkey but got lost inside a book I was reading and I almost burned the kitchen down.” She laughed softly at the memory. “Mom made me promise never to go inside the kitchen again.”
“I always loved to cook,” Mrs. Willows said with a smile.”I was into experimenting and would make my poor husband be my guinea pig. He would taste whatever I asked him to without compl
aining until I perfected the art of whatever it was I was making. I find cooking to be therapeutic and I think it’s one of those things that has kept me over the years after my husband passed away, that and my painting.”
They ate in silence for a little bit then the woman surprised her by saying: “Quite a handsome young man you got yourself there last night,” her watery blue eyes looked at the beautiful young girl curiously.
“You saw him?” Kym asked her resignedly.
“Of course, I always look out to make sure you are not being abducted or anything like that,” the woman told her mildly. “It looks serious.”
“It’s not,” Kym told her firmly spooning the liquid and vegetables into her mouth and wishing she did not have to talk about it. “He has not called.”
“And you are not going to call him of course because that would be too forward of you.” Mrs. Willows said shrewdly. “It’s funny how we have come so far where technology is concerned and yet we are still mired in the past. In my days it would be considered a mortal sin if a woman contacted a man first but nowadays it is supposed to be acceptable.” She paused and looked at Kym. “I have a feeling that that young man is probably waiting to hear from you as well my dear and probably just as confused as you are.”
“I strongly doubt that,” Kym said dryly. “He is rich and handsome and is used to getting his own way so there is no way he is shy about calling. If he has not called it means he has lost interest.”
“He has been showing interest all along, why should he be lacking in interest now?”
“Because I foolishly allowed him to get what he wanted and now he is no longer interested!” Kym said bitterly.
Chapter 6
Three days passed and he did not call. She immersed herself in her writing with a vengeance. Her mother called and spoke to her about a neighbor dying.
“He was not sick dear and I realized I had not seen him in several days.” Her mother told her, voice subdued. “They found him dead inside the house.”
“I am sorry to hear that mom,” she said sympathetically, looking at what she had written so far. “Didn’t he have any children?”
“Just a son, his wife died fifteen years ago and the son did not really come around.”
“How are you taking it?” Kym asked her in concern.
“I am just realizing more than ever how short life is.” She murmured. “How are you dear?”
“I am just trying to get this book finished so I can take a little break. I am thinking of maybe going to Europe for a little bit.”
“Honey are you sure you are okay? What is this about going to Europe?”
“I need to go away and forget about writing for a bit.” She told her.
“I hope you know you can talk to me about anything honey.” Her mother told her.
“I know mom,” she told her fondly. “Tell pops hi for me.”
“I will dear.”
*****
He called her on the third day and she looked at the number and his name and did not answer the phone. He kept calling her throughout the day but she turned off her phone and continued writing.
The day had turned out quite well, not so cold and with a bright sun shining from the still leaden sky. She decided that she should go out to the abandon building and see if inspiration would hit. Packing a picnic basket with some fruits and cheese sandwiches and a bottle of white wine that had been chilling in the fridge. Putting on her poncho and old jeans, she went on her way.
The roof of the building was still intact and the walls were still solid but the floors had crumbled in places. It had originally been a manor and the columns were still majestic and towered in the air. She had explored the rooms and tried to imagine what it had been like living in the house. There were numerous bedrooms and there was a huge fireplace in the hall, large enough to be used as a room. She closed her eyes and pictured the occupants of the house. She had done her research and knew that it had been in one family for six generations until the current owner had abandoned the huge house and gone away leaving it to crumble. It still had not lost its grandeur. She had planned to base a novel in this very spot and she had even gotten pictures of its former glory and was going to write something about a renaissance romance.
She spread the blanket and took out the food she had taken with her and started to eat feeling the cold coming through the thick poncho but she wanted to be outside for a little bit and away from her house. She needed time to think and not about what she had shared with Julian. She had felt something for him and when they had made love that feeling had spiraled above anything she had ever experienced before.
She had finished eating and was lying on her back with her hands behind her head when she heard footsteps on the uneven floor. Before she turned her head to look she knew it was him because her body had tightened in awareness. He stopped within a few inches away from her. “Your very nice and nosy neighbor told me you might be here,” he told her softly.
Her eyes traveled the length of him from his black leather boots to his black dress pants and up to his green ribbed sweater that matched his eyes perfectly. His hair was tousled and made him look boyishly handsome and as she looked at his lips, she remembered his mouth all over her body. “I come here sometimes to get inspiration and imagine what the former occupants of this place felt like living here. The architecture is still beautiful and those columns are magnificent.” She pointed to them.
He crouched down beside her, knowing from her tone that he was going to have a hell of a time convincing her that him not calling her was unlike his usual modus operandi. “I needed time to think about what I feel when I am with you.” He ventured.
“Don’t worry about it,” she told him getting up and pulling her knees under her chin, her dark brown eyes cool and indifferent. “We had a good time so let’s leave it at that. How are you?”
She was polite and indifferent and she was looking straight through him. He had left it too long. “Terrible,” he told her forcing himself to remain calm. “I have not been able to sleep and eat because I have been thinking about you so much.”
“You’ll get over it,” she got up and started gathering her stuff together and he bent to help her, his heart thudding inside his chest. He was not getting through to her.
“I don’t want to get over of it,” he told her tightly holding on to the blanket as she reached for it. She let it go and held the picnic basket in her hand and started to walk away. “I am falling in love with you dammit!”
She stopped so suddenly that he almost careened into her. She turned around to face him and to his surprise she started to laugh. “You don’t know what love is Julian,” she told him coolly when she had finished laughing. “You probably think that I am gullible enough to believe you and that is a way of getting me back in bed. You do not have to go to such lengths, as I said we had a good time and if and when I want to do it again I will let you know.”
She turned and started walking without waiting for what he had to say. He knew he deserved every damning word that came out of her mouth but he had no idea he could feel so much pain. He caught up to her and grabbed her arm forcing her to stop. “I tell you I am falling in love with you and you behave as if I just told you I found a beetle on the ground!” he took a deep breath to calm himself down before he continued. “I am not an imbecile Kym! I know I don’t have the best reputation but I know what I feel! I was scared and I hid because I've never felt this way before and I was thinking that you have way too much power over me, I did not know what to do.”
“You don’t owe me an explanation,” she told him coldly trying to pull her arm away from him but he held on. “You are not capable of being in a committed relationship and I get that but don’t come here and try to convince me that you have changed, you are who you are and you cannot change that.”
He wanted to shake her until he saw the fire in her eyes and he wanted to stop the despair from drowning him. “I changed when I met you,” his voice sounded
weary and her heart almost, but not quite, went out to him, she could not afford to drop her guard again. “I saw you that night at the bar and I have not been able to be with anyone else since. I know what I feel and I am asking you to give me a chance.” His eyes had turned bleak as he looked down at her. The wind had whipped her curls around her exquisite face and even though her face was devoid of make-up she looked wonderful. “I have never begged for anything in my life but I am begging you to give me a chance.”
She stood there staring up at him and she wanted to throw her hands around his neck and sink into him but she stood her ground. “I don’t want you to beg.” She told him quietly. “I just want to be left alone and continue the way I was before, I cannot handle a relationship right now anyway.”
“If you can look at me and tell me that you did not feel something when we made love then I will walk away from you, as difficult as it may be,” his tone was quiet and his grip had loosened a little.
“I can’t tell you that,” she looked up at him and suddenly she wanted to touch him, touch his face and soothe away the lines of misery she saw there. “I felt something when we were together but you went away and did not call and that killed it and it’s not something I want to rekindle.”
“No!” the word tore from his mouth and to her surprise he pulled her into his arms. She dropped the basket as he hauled her close to him and before she could stop him, his mouth took hers savagely, his movements desperate. She clung to him and her mouth opened underneath his unconsciously. His arms came around her like a vice and he deepened the kiss, his mouth moving over hers, his hands roaming over her body as if seeking some sort of solace for the pain he was feeling.
He broke away from her after a few minutes, his fists clenched at his sides. “Please,” he whispered hoarsely.
Kym was shaken badly and she felt the blood coursing through her veins. She knew without a doubt that she was far from indifferent to him. “I can’t,” she whispered but she knew she was weakening.
“You can,” his voice was urgent. The wind was blowing around them and the place had gotten dark. It was cold but they did not notice, neither of them felt the cold nipping at their clothes. Her eyes widened as he went down on one knee in front of her. “I want to marry you; will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”
