by BWWM Club
"I didn't tell him it was fake," Dimitri said quietly.
I don't understand," she said truthfully.
"The truth is I don’t consider our marriage to be fake,” he said.
“You don’t?” she asked surprised.
“Not at all. I mean it’s not traditional but I think we are growing. I love the time that we spend together.”
“I do too,” Jordan admitted.
He leaned in and took her chin in his hand.
“Dimitri, we…” she began.
But her words were lost as his lips touched her own. The kiss wasn’t urgent. It was slow and deliberate, sweet. Jordan felt her resolve waver and she relaxed in his embrace, kissing him back. He tasted of peppermint, like the mints he carried in his jacket. His cheeks were cold from the wind but as they moved closer together she could feel his temperature rise as her own skin grew flushed. Her hands moved to the nape of his neck and she ran her fingers through his thick hair. She didn’t know if they kissed for one minute or one year, time ceased to have meaning and when they broke apart Jordan was left breathless.
Jordan and Shay had been gone all day. Shopping for her party which was only four days away. Shay was bouncing off the walls in excitement. The one thing that she was sad about was that Morgan wouldn’t be able to attend. Paula had called to say the tickets were far too expensive the week before. Jordan promised that she would take pictures and when she got back they would all go out to celebrate. The problem was Jordan didn’t feel much like celebrating. Leaving Dimitri behind broke her heart, although she wouldn’t admit it. Then that kiss last night confused her more than ever.
She prolonged their trip, stopping at every store purposely so that she could avoid Dimitri. She knew that he would want to talk about last night and the truth was she didn’t know what to say. Finally, she could delay going home no further and she pulled into the driveway. Dimitri’s Lexus was parked on the driveway which meant he was home.
“I have a surprise for you Shay,” Dimitri said as soon as they stepped inside.
“A surprise?” she asked.
“Dimitri another surprise?” Jordan asked.
“I promise this is the last one. Consider it an early birthday gift,” he said with a grin.
Dimitri handed the box to Shay. Inside was a dress very similar to the ones that were worn at the Winter Palace Ball. It was gold with intricate embroidery and a royal blue sash.
“This is incredible,” Shay said hugging the dress. “Thank you so much” she gushed.
“Wait, there’s more,” Dimitri said. He handed her another small blue velvet box from the shopping bag he carried.
Shay looked at Jordan. From the box alone she could tell that this was lavish. Shay opened the box revealing a delicate gold tiara with tiny sapphires that matched the blue sash of the dress.
“Oh my God,” Shay exclaimed. “This is absolutely perfect. Is this real?” she asked suddenly.
“Yes it is and before you say no Jordan, this one is just on loan. I called in a favor,” Dmitri said holding his hand up in protest.
“Mom can I please wear it?” Shay asked.
Jordan bit her lip. On the one hand she wasn’t sure how much trouble he would be in if something happened to it. On the other hand, she could see the pleading looks on both Shay and Dimitri’s faces.
“Okay,” she finally agreed. “But you have to keep it in your safe until Friday night Dimitri. And you have to let me make dinner tonight, give Katya the night off. To say thank you,” she added.
“American food. Okay that sounds wonderful,” he agreed with a smile.
Shay squealed. “Thank you, Mom. Thank you Dimitri,” she said hugging them both.
“You’re welcome,” Dimitri said.
“I have to go and call Morgan,” Shay said racing up the stairs.
Jordan waited until she heard Shay’s bedroom door close before she turned to Dimitri.
“About last night,” she started.
“Yes. I’ve been wanting to talk to you about that,” he beamed.
“Dimitri the truth is I’ve been wanting to kiss you for a long time. It’s just I have a daughter and I just can’t be cavalier about my personal life,” she explained.
“I love your daughter. It was just a kiss Jordan. I like you. A lot. I’m not asking you to marry me,” he said jokingly.
“That’s not funny,” Jordan scowled.
“Jordan you know you have the right to be happy right? These past few months have been incredible. I finally had a reason to come home. You and Shay, you make this house full of life,” Dimitri said quietly.
“I understand,” she said slowly, “but Shayna.”
“What about her?” Dimitri asked. “You can’t keep using Shay as an excuse Jordan.”
“Dimitri you don’t understand. You don’t have any children,” Jordan said shaking her head.
“I see. I consider Shayna to be a daughter to me,” he said looking at her sadly.
“Don’t look at me like that. Shay has been in your life for less than a year. You’ve been great but that doesn’t mean that you know what it’s like being a parent. It’s not just about buying nice things and all the fun times. It’s about sacrifice too. It’s about putting their happiness before your own.”
“Jordan. I may not be a parent as you say. But I know how to love. I know all about sacrifices. I’ve sacrificed my feelings this entire time pretending we are just friends. When every day I fall in love with you more and more. So don’t tell me I know nothing about sacrifice,” he said gently, clearly hurt.
“Dimitri I don’t know what to say,” she replied.
“Do you love me back Jordan? Or are you just biding your time until we can get a divorce and you go back home?” he asked.
“Dimitri. I don’t know. I don’t know what I feel.”
“That’s not an answer,” he protested.
“I am so confused. This marriage was only supposed to be until my visa came through. I’m leaving next week. What do we do then? You’re halfway across the globe. It just wouldn’t work. I can’t get hurt Dimitri but more than that I can’t allow anyone to hurt Shay.”
He just looked at her for a few moments, she couldn’t tell what he was thinking but she could see the pain clearly written across his face.
“What if I asked you not to go? Stay here with me?” he asked.
“Dimitri I…I can’t stay here. My life is in the US. My job, everything.”
“You could work here,” he suggested.
“As what? Your tutor? Because it seems to me that you don’t need an English tutor anymore,” Jordan countered.
“My assistant. Or at the high school. I’m sure there would be a position there for you.”
“Dimitri I can’t. I’m sorry. This is not going to work.”
“You never answered my question Jordan. Do you love me?” he asked, his eyes filled with hope.
Jordan didn’t know how to answer that question and didn’t trust her voice. Finally, she spoke.
“Dimitri…I care about you very much but no, I don’t love you,” she lied.
He looked at her in despair, saying nothing. His face fell as he processed her words. His shoulders sagged and he swallowed before speaking.
“There’s a dress for you too,” he said finally. “I put it in your room.”
“You didn’t have to do that,” she said again.
“It’s done,” he said turning to leave.
“Where are you going?” Jordan asked quietly.
“Jordan I just want to be alone right now,” he said. “To think.”
“What about dinner?” she asked.
He paused for a brief moment his hand on the doorknob.
“I need to grab something from the office. Another time,” he said before walking out and closing the door behind him.
Jordan dissolved into tears. She wanted to run after him, tell him she was untruthful but she knew she was doing the right thing. For everyone.
Chapter 8
The next morning Dimitri had not shown up for breakfast much to the dismay of Jordan. She had heard him come in last night, late. She had waited in the library hoping to talk to him but he went straight to his room. Soon the rest of the household had left the kitchen, already in full party mode, leaving Jordan to sip on her cold coffee. She thought that maybe he might still be sleeping, though that was very unusual for Dimitri but a quick inspection of the garage had revealed that his car was gone. She knew he wasn’t at work, they had both taken the rest of the week off to focus on the party. She hesitated calling him on his cellphone, not sure what she would say if he even answered her.
She didn't know why she had lied but the truth was that she was scared.
Suddenly the doorbell rang, startling Jordan. She jumped up and rushed to the door hoping that it was Dmitri. Maybe he forgot his key. When she opened the door she got the surprise of her life. Paula and Morgan were standing in the doorway, huge grins on their faces.
“Surprise,” they both cheered in unison.
“Oh my God! What are you both doing here? Come in! Come in!” she said hugging her best friend excitedly. “I thought you couldn’t come.”
“Well when Dimitri found out about the tickets being so expensive he bought us tickets. He insisted and wouldn’t take no for an answer. He wanted us to be here for Shay’s big day.”
“Where’s Shay Aunt Jordan?” Morgan asked impatiently.
“She’s in her room probably still asleep. Shay!” Jordan called up the stairs. “Come down here I have a surprise for you.”
Shay appeared at the top step still sleepy.
“Yes Mom?” she asked.
Suddenly she saw Morgan. She screamed in delight and ran down the stairs hugging her cousin in a tight embrace.
“I spoke to you yesterday! When did you get here?”
“We left last night and got here this morning,” Morgan explained
“You have got to see my room,” she said. “Mom this is the best birthday ever,” she said kissing Jordan on the cheek. Morgan followed her up the stairs, the two talking zealously the whole time.
“I can't believe you're here,” Jordan said turning to Paula.
“Me either but Dimitri begged us to come.”
“Do you want a cup of coffee?” she asked
“That would be fantastic. You can't imagine how exhausting an eleven-hour flight can be.”
Jordan laughed. “I've taken the flight myself. Trust me I know.”
She poured Paula a cup of coffee and the two sat down to catch up.
“So where is your husband anyway,” she teased.
Jordan burst into tears. She briefly explained the situation between her and Dimitri sobbing the entire time. Paula listened patiently not interrupting.
“Jordan what is wrong with you?” she sighed. “You have this fantastic man that you are obviously madly in love with. So why are you fighting it?”
“It just wouldn’t work between us. And I don’t want Shay getting hurt if it didn’t.”
“I talk to you almost every other day. I know how you feel about this man, why on Earth would you lie to him? Why don't you tell him how you really feel?
“I don't know. I guess I got scared. I don't know what to do but I have to think about her well-being before my own.”
“Jordan, Shayna is thirteen, or she will be very soon. She’s not a child anymore. You can’t always protect her. I’ve seen Dimitri with her. He’s great. Don’t let fear stop you from something good. Something amazing. You deserve it Jordan.”
“I know. I guess I don’t know what it feels like to be loved,” she admitted.
“I've been saying for the longest time that you're taking a ridiculous line on this, you're my best friend and I'll tell you Dimitri is a good man. Fix it Jordan.”
The next few days were insane. That afternoon Yuri turned up to surprise Paula and Dimitri. They had been casually dating and things were getting much more serious between the two. He took Paula, Morgan and Shay to get costumes for the ball. After seeing her cousin’s dress, Morgan insisted on getting a costume as well. Dimitri decided to go with them although Jordan had hoped that they would have time alone to talk. That never panned out because Dimitri conveniently made sure that he and Jordan were never alone.
The final decorations had arrived and everyone was busy turning the living room into the winter palace. Shay and Morgan were joined by Oksana and Yana who were busy getting their hair and makeup done by Oksana’s older sister who was a beautician. Andrei, Olaf, Yuri and Dimitri moved the living room furniture to a spare room and brought in the white wooden chairs and tables they had rented for the occasion. Katya had finalized the cake that morning and it was unbelievable. Royal blue with edible gold trimmings and leaf adorned with edible pearls. She placed it on the cake table and left to go get ready. Jordan looked at her watch. It was getting late but she wanted to make sure the caterer knew where everything needed to go.
After making sure that the final details were in order she made her way up to her room to get ready. Oksana’s sister Angelika passed her on the staircase to tell her they were done. She was going home to get ready and would be back in time for the party. She stopped by Shay’s room to check on the girls but instead she overheard them talking.
“Are you excited to be coming back to DC?” Morgan asked.
“I don’t know. In a way yes but I also wish that I could stay here too,” Shay admitted.
“Wait do you really think you’re going back to the US?” Oksana questioned.
“Yes. Next week. I asked my mom and she said we were all set,” Shay said sadly.
“But what about Mr. V?” Yana asked.
“He’s not coming. He’s staying here,” she said, the despair in her voice apparent.
“I don’t understand. How can two married people live in different countries? I would never do that,” Oksana exclaimed.
“Well. I think that they’re getting a divorce,” Shay said. “How does my makeup look?” Shay said trying to change the subject.
“Amazing but why would they get a divorce? They are perfect for one another!” Yana asked.
“My mom was talking to Aunt Jordan and I heard her say that she was being silly leaving,” Morgan stated.
“She is being silly,” Shay agreed. “It’s clear to everyone but them how much they really love one another. My mom is just all about being independent and not needing anyone. I don’t care if the marriage was fake I think they might have fell in love for real. They’re both just too stubborn to see it.”
This shocked Jordan. She didn’t know Shay thought about her like that. She hadn’t realized that she had let her closest friends know that the marriage was only one of convenience but of course she would. It was a lot for a twelve-year-old to deal with herself. It made her sad. She had not realized how this was taking a toll on Shay.
“I feel bad for Mr. V. I see how he looks at your mom. This is going to break his heart,” Oksana mused.
“I feel bad for Ms. Hill. Do you see the way she looks at him? Adults are weird.”
“Yes just like my mom. She likes Yuri so much but she pretends she doesn’t. I mean the guy flew all the way here just to be her date at a party. I really like him too. I just want her to be happy but she thinks I will be mad because he’s not my dad. I can like him it doesn’t mean my dad is not going to be part of my life anymore.”
“I know what you mean. My parents got divorced and my mom got remarried to my stepfather. I love them both, my dad and Mikhail. Sometimes we all go on vacation together. Us and my dad and my stepmom Lydia. She’s great too. Grownups think we’re too young to understand these things,” Oksana chimed in.
“I wish you didn’t have to go,” Yana said sadly.
“I’m going to miss you guys so much. But especially Mr. V. I wish he could be my dad forever. I never had a father before but he’s the perfect one. I love him so much. I just wish we didn’t have to
leave.”
Jordan didn’t want to hear anymore. She knocked on the door.
“Hi girls. I just came to check on you.”
“Oh, hi Mom,” Shay said surprised. She hoped that Jordan had not heard them talking.
“You girls look incredible. So grown up,” Jordan said tears in her eyes.
“Mom stop it, you’re embarrassing me,” Shay laughed. She had mistaken the reason for Jordan’s tears.
There was a knock on the door. It was Dimitri.
“Hello. I hope I’m not interrupting. I just came to bring you this,” he said holding the velvet box.
He placed the tiara on Shay’s head. The effect was stunning. She did indeed look like a little princess.
Shay looked at herself in the mirror while her friends ooh’ed and ah’ed. She turned to Dimitri and hugged him. Tears in her eyes.
“Thank you Mr. V. For everything,” she sobbed.
He knelt beside her and used his handkerchief to wipe her eyes.
“Don’t cry princess. You’ll ruin your makeup,” he said joking hoping to stop her from crying.
“I love you Mr. V,” she said into his shoulder, the previous conversation had overwhelmed her.
“I love you too Shayna,” he said his voice choking up. “Okay I have to go get ready. We have a ball to go to!”
He carefully avoided Jordan’s eyes as he left to get ready.
*****
Jordan dried off from the shower and admired the dress laying on her bed. She still couldn’t believe that Dmitri had bought her such an elegant dress, and secretly Jordan loved that he had thought of her. She looked incredible. Like Russian royalty. The dress was ice blue adorned in silver embellishments and trimmed with white fur. The headpiece was made to look like a crown, silver with ice blue gems and diamonds. She applied her makeup expertly. Light blue shadow and lipstick that made her look like a beautiful ice queen. Paula joined her soon looking elegant in a silk gold dress.
By the time they made their way downstairs, people had started arriving. Dimitri looked incredible in a traditional costume. The jacket was long, almost to his knees. The exact same shade of blue as Jordan’s dress and similarly embellished. He was talking to Viktor, she recognized him from his picture, and Dimitri was introducing him to Shay. He looked up and his eyes found Jordan and beckoned her over. The introductions were all very formal. Jordan wanted to talk to Dimitri alone but he disappeared before she could ask him.
