by Ruth Dugdall
‘Okay, Holly, you’re going to be shown a series of images. Just look at the picture and we’ll see which part of your brain lights up. Okay?’
Memories came to her, like scenes from a film, of children in dark woods and the screams of a ghost. All of the moments that had triggered her synaesthesia. She’d be stronger, she would no longer hide her trait: synaesthesia was a gift to a paramedic, it helped her make sense of things.
From now on, she wouldn’t fight her gift. She wouldn’t make the same error twice.
‘The test is over, Holly. You can relax now.’
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
This book was inspired by a family anecdote about my great-uncle, George Hair, who owned a farm in Lincolnshire. After a day throttling chickens, he fell into a deep sleep, but was woken by his wife’s screams in the early hours of the morning. He had his hands around her neck, and was strangling her, dreaming that he was still with those chickens. She lived to tell the tale, which is how I got to hear of it. This same uncle jumped through a glass window when he dreamed he was jumping fences on his horse. This book is dedicated to him.
I’m grateful to the many people who helped turn that story into the book you now hold in your hands. The team at Thomas & Mercer have, once again, been a tour de force of talent and I’m very lucky to be published by them. Victoria Pepe, commissioning editor, came to my manuscript with fresh eyes and helped turn it into something different, along with Sophie Wilson – such a sensitive editor that I felt fully supported even when I was ripping a new heart into the story. Thank you both for your insight, and for giving me the time to catch up. Thanks to Monica Byles, copy editor, for your astounding precision and thoroughness.
Thanks again to my trusty writing group: Elizabeth Ferretti, Morag Liffen, Sophie Green and Jane Bailey. Now I’m living on the other side of the pond, we’re back to meeting on Skype, and I’m even more grateful for my monthly dose of feedback and friendship.
I’m very fortunate to have the world’s best agent, Lorella Belli, whose support is unstinting and who is always on the other end of an email or phone line when I need her.
I have been blessed to have had DS Darren Bruce from Suffolk Constabulary as my guide on all things ‘police procedural’. Darren, thank you for all those hours at Milsoms. Your knowledge is awe-inspiring and your stories made my jaw drop. This book won’t be what you (or I) envisioned at that point, but I hope you like it.
Thanks to Professor Jamie Ward from Sussex University for his email correspondence, and especially for forwarding his report on mirror-touch synaesthesia. All remaining inaccuracies and fictional liberties are mine.
The name Kaitlin Burgess appears courtesy of her parents, who bought the right to have her name in the book at a charity auction to raise funds for The Literacy Council of Benton County in Bentonville, Arkansas. Its purpose is to teach adults to read English and help them become more successful in society. Kaitlin, I hope you like your character, as I have a feeling we’ll be meeting her in my next novel too!
Finally, thank you to the readers who have found my books and enjoy them. I never take a single one of you for granted.
Ruth Dugdall
Palo Alto, California
December 2017
If you are affected by any of the conditions referred to in this book, you may like to contact:
UK Synaesthesia Association
http://www.uksynaesthesia.com/
The Sleep Council
https://sleepcouncil.org.uk/
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Photo © 2017 Jemma Watts
Ruth Dugdall is an award-winning British crime author.
In 2005, she won the CWA Debut Dagger for The Woman Before Me, which also won the Luke Bitmead Bursary in 2009. Since then, her novels have been published internationally.
Ruth’s novels are inspired by her previous career as a probation officer and she continues to be involved with the criminal justice system in a voluntary capacity.
Previously a resident of Luxembourg, Ruth now divides her time between the UK and California.
