by Lexi Blake
“Or I could do it.” Micky stood in the doorway dressed in a T-shirt and flannel pajama bottoms. He looked younger than his seventeen years. Her heart threatened to break. He was so young and so precious to her. She couldn’t fail him.
Alexei leaned back in, but she moved away. She couldn’t make out with her boyfriend in front of her son. Alexei’s eyes darkened, but he stepped back. “We will talk about that later, dushka. Good-bye, Mick. I will be looking forward to seeing you later. Take care of your mother.”
“Always.”
Alexei left, waving good-bye, and she was alone with her son.
“Don’t you dare do this to me.” Micky crossed his arms over his chest and stared at her, a spark of rage in his eyes.
God. She’d already made him uncomfortable. What had she expected? He’d come looking for his mom and found her with two men. It was normal in Bliss, but Micky hadn’t grown up here. What must he think of her? Tears blurred her eyes. Just as she found some small measure of happiness, she was going to have to give it up because her son came first. “I’ll talk to him. Don’t worry about it, baby. This is your home. I won’t have you uncomfortable.”
“And you don’t understand me. I wasn’t telling you to dump your ungodly hot boyfriend. Seriously? I need to go to Russia. And Red is weird, but totally hot in a geek-chic, I’ve-got-PTSD way.” Micky shook his head and walked to her. “I didn’t come here to wreck your life. I came here to be with my mom.”
Every word seemed to cut through her. “And I should focus on you.”
Micky’s hands came up in frustration. He had some of his father’s coloring, but she could see her dad in Micky’s eyes. He had that same expression her father had always had when he thought she was doing something dumb. “No, you shouldn’t focus on me. You should be happy. What have you always told me you wanted for me? When Dad was putting me through every honors class and pushing me to achieve, what did you want for me?”
Micky had been under so much pressure to be perfect. “I wanted you to be happy.”
“You said happiness was the only thing that mattered. You told me to be true to who I am and what I want. To be kind to those around me and to love—to really love. Don’t you dare think I want less for you. I will be so mad if you break up with those gods of masculinity because you think I don’t know what sex is.”
Maybe he was more mature than she’d thought. She touched his face. God, she remembered how small he’d been, how he’d clung to her like a little monkey. He’d been such a sweet child, and he was almost a man. She’d missed him. “I wish I’d been with you.”
He softened. “You were, Mom. We talked every day we could. I never stopped hearing your voice in my head. I never thought for one second that you didn’t love me. You just picked the wrong man to marry.”
“I am going to kill your father. He had no right to do this to you.” She felt her fists clench.
“Don’t. Mom, please, don’t call him. It’s over, and I’m cool with it. I’m good. I want to move on.” He hugged her. “He wasn’t all bad, you know. I know he was a horrible husband. Still is, by the way, but he wasn’t a terrible dad.”
“How can you say that? You came out to him, and he kicked you out.”
“I’m not surprised. I was kind of hoping he would. Mom, I went into that room knowing he would probably do it. I’m a campaign liability. I’m good with this. Let it be. Come on. I have one year and then I’m off to college, and I don’t want you to worry about that, either. I want to enjoy this year with my mom. Can we do that?”
She nodded. “I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. I care about Alexei and Caleb, but I know it’s weird. I think a lot of people would think raising a teen around a ménage relationship would be wrong.”
“Yeah, well raising a kid around politics is way worse. Trust me—all the backstabbing and double-dealing has warped me way worse than your crazy sex stuff ever will. Don’t worry, Mom. According to Gaga, you were born this way. And we should all listen to Gaga.” He grinned and walked around the living room. He picked up something that had fallen behind the couch. “But seriously, they’re slobs. We have to work on that.”
Two pairs of underwear. Alexei’s and Caleb’s boxers. Embarrassment flashed through her. She was beyond happy that Micky was okay with her relationship, but she didn’t want to push it in his face. She grabbed the undies from him. “I’ll make sure to note your preferences.”
He laughed as he looked around the cabin. She was well aware it wasn’t anything like the estate he’d grown up on. He simply straightened up the pile of magazines on the end table. “Good. And I’ll get ready for breakfast. Take me into town. Show me around. I want to see everything, starting with where you work. I have two weeks before I have to start sending in assignments. And before you freak out, I left all the information on the table. It’s a perfectly licensed school. Every college will accept the transcripts. It’s in California, but I can send everything in remotely, and my teachers will do conferences and lectures over the Internet.”
He’d figured it all out. She was beginning to be intimidated by her son’s competence. She played with the pamphlets he’d left. “I’ll look into it.”
Micky winked. “Do that. I’m going to take a quick shower. Hopefully the big dude didn’t take all the hot water.”
“All right.” She took a deep breath as he disappeared into the bathroom.
The phone rang as she sat down to read the material he’d left for her.
“Holly?” There was no mistaking the smooth, douchebag tones of his voice.
“Scott? You asshole. How dare you call here.” She practically growled into the phone. If she could have reached through it and ripped his throat out, she would have.
He snorted. “Yes, I’m not the one with nerve, sweetheart. Let’s agree that it’s a family trait. I want to make sure Micky got in okay. He left late last night.”
Now he was worried about their son? “You have no right to even ask about him. You kicked him out.”
He chuckled. “Damn, I love that kid. If that’s the way we’re playing it, then fine. I’ve always been the bad guy in your head. All right, I’ll allow that I am the bad guy. Is he okay?”
“He’s in one piece.” No thanks to Scott.
“Good. I hope he’s getting what he wanted.” There was a long pause. “You tell him to stick to our deal.”
The line went dead, and she was left wondering what was going on.
* * * *
Caleb stood outside the store, staring up at it. He did that sometimes. Sometimes Bliss was so weird, he had to stop and take the moment in.
Technically the Guns and Biker Stuff and More Store was halfway between Bliss and Del Norte, but damn the place definitely felt like Bliss. The building was a long cabin-style structure, and a big dude with a beard that any pirate would envy sat on a rocking chair on the porch rocking back and forth and drinking a beer at ten in the morning. If he was upset Caleb was standing and staring, he didn’t show it.
The purr of a truck caught his attention and he turned. Wolf was here. Thank god. He wasn’t sure he would actually be able to go into that place. It could be a trap. He would send Wolf in to get the items he needed.
What items did he need? Condoms.
How the hell was he going to buy condoms here? Did they sell them next to the revolvers? Did you get a discount for buying both? When he thought about it, they were actually similar. One protected a dude from assholes and the other from tiny humans who would need him far more than he could handle.
Did Alexei want kids? Did Holly want another one?
Stop. He wasn’t going there. That was a mighty big leap to take when he’d slept with her once.
“You just going to stand there?” Wolf came to his side.
“He seems to like standing,” the dude with the long beard said as he rocked. “He’s the doc, right? The one from Bliss? Seen him around. Folks say he’s weird. They’re right.”
The screen
door opened and a tiny woman strode out. “Willie, don’t be rude. Wolf is a wonderful customer and this man is his friend.”
Willie shook his head at the newcomer. “Wasn’t being rude, baby. Just stating plain truth. Doc’s been standing in the parking lot for a good ten minutes. If Mel was here, he would say the aliens got in his head.”
“This is a parking lot?” It was a yard, and not particularly well kept. He’d gotten a ride from Cam, who’d dropped him off with a grin. “And I was waiting for Wolf. He’s the expert here.”
The expert on sex toys. Though he couldn’t be much of an expert if he’d brought them to a gun store to buy sex stuff. Unless Wolf was way kinkier than he thought…
The woman, who wore capri pants and a bright pink blouse, smiled. Caleb pegged her in her early sixties, with a bounce in her step and wide brown eyes. Her salt and pepper hair was wrapped in a coronet around her head. She glided down the steps and held out her arms. “Hello, Wolf. How is your mother?”
“Mom is great, Deb.” Wolf hugged the tiny woman with the ease of a man who knew how to connect to the people around him. Wolf wouldn’t have stood out in the “parking lot” staring at the hand-painted sign and wondering what the hell he was doing. Wolf would have strode in boldly and proclaimed what he needed.
“I’m here for a butt plug.”
All eyes were suddenly on him. Willie even took off the mirrored sunglasses that covered his eyes.
Wolf probably wouldn’t have put it like that.
A laugh huffed from his friend, and that seemed to break the moment. Deb and Willie both had a nice guffaw at his expense, but the truth was it wasn’t all that costly. He didn’t have a real sense of shame when it came to the crap that came out of his mouth. He’d grown up in a household where he’d been expected to be politic all the time. He’d never been any good at it.
Willie stood up. “Well, I think that’s my cue. You gentlemen join me when you’re ready. I’ll have a selection for you. Is this for you? I have a very manly set that came in just the other day.”
Of course he did have a nicely stocked sense of pure embarrassment. “I’m sorry, what?”
Wolf’s grin was as big as the sky. “Dr. Burke is not training his own anus, Willie. This is for his lady.”
“Ah, he finally got into Holly’s undies,” Willie said and then his eyes went steely. “Or is this for some other woman?”
He got the feeling that if he answered incorrectly, his access to anal plugs might be closed in this establishment. Or limited to ones with spikes or something. “My…” He’d been about to say girlfriend. “I like Holly.”
And he was absolutely certain he was going to love her asshole. That was really all the commitment he could make now.
“Then I’ll bring out our feminine line.” Willie disappeared into the store, his beer still in hand.
“I know I shouldn’t ask this,” Caleb began with a sense of trepidation that didn’t quite overcome his curiosity, “but what are the differences between male and female butt plugs? Technically the tissue is the same. The muscles are the same.”
Wolf shook his head. “I believe he’s talking about presentation.”
“Well, I was planning on presenting it to her with lubrication.”
Deb’s hand went over her mouth, obviously holding in her mirth. She took a deep breath and became the competent business owner once more. “I believe he’s talking about size and color, and Willie has a few with some interesting attachments. He’ll walk you through it all. Come on in when you’re ready. I’ve got blueberry muffins just out of the oven. We’re expecting the OG Pack MC coming through this morning, so I added extra fiber. Don’t let the name scare you. It’s not original gangsters. It’s Old Geezers. To become a prospect you have to show your AARP card. I’m going to put some coffee on. They get cranky without caffeine.”
And they called him weird.
“So you did the deed last night.” Wolf looked at him with approval. “How are you feeling?”
“Perfectly well,” Caleb replied. Sex had taken his stress level down briefly, but then the normal anxieties had come back. “My blood pressure is normal. Nose is a little stuffy but I bet that’s allergies.”
Wolf groaned. “I meant emotionally. How do you feel about the fact that you had a three-way.”
“I did not have a three-way.” He needed to put that rumor to bed now. “I had a one-way and Alexei had a one-way, and Holly was kind of the intersection. But our cars didn’t have a rear ender, if you know what I mean.”
Wolf stared at him. “You are insane. You know that, right?”
“I think the definition of sanity should be more fluid,” he admitted. “I didn’t enjoy the psychology courses I took. Now explain to me what biker stuff is. I get the guns. I’m curious about the more. Why biker stuff?”
Wolf shrugged. “Willie watched Sons of Anarchy and his guns and more store became a place to buy biker stuff. Not like motorcycles, but they have all kinds of accessories. I don’t know, man. I don’t actually go into that part of the store. Deb is an expert on firearms and ammo and Willie is the toy maker. Not that he makes the plugs, but he’s an excellent artisan when it comes to paddles and floggers. Now tell me how you feel.”
“I feel like you’re way weirder than me because you know these people. I thought Nell and Henry were the odd balls. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. I also feel I should stick with the butt plug because Holly might become concerned if I came home with paddles and floggers.” She might use them on him.
Wolf stared.
And stared.
Caleb let out a groan of frustration. “Fine. It was great and I care about her. I do. I didn’t even hate Alexei being there. It felt oddly normal.”
“Then why did you try to run?” Wolf asked.
Damn gossip mill. “Because it felt oddly normal. Because I liked it too much. Because Holly told me she loved me and for a minute I wanted to say it back.”
Wolf put a hand on his shoulder. “That’s good.”
“I didn’t say it back.” He couldn’t.
One big shoulder shrugged. “Well, we’re taking baby steps. I heard her son is in town. How did that go?”
“Seems like a nice kid.” Mick had handled finding his mom with two men pretty well, considering. “A little sarcastic, but I can deal with that. I think Holly was embarrassed though.” Maybe he should think about this.
“Stop right there,” Wolf ordered. “Don’t even go there. You’re all adults and her kid is in his last year of high school. She deserves to have a life. No one in Bliss is going to blink an eye.”
And Mickey had seemed cool with it. “I’m trying. Like I said, it was nice. It was probably the best night I’ve had in a long time.”
The trouble was he wasn’t sure he could trust it. Not because he didn’t trust Holly. It was the universe he didn’t trust. He’d come to understand that life was a capricious thing that tossed him one way or another like a boat in a storm.
Of course a boat was better handled when there was a crew on it rather than a singular captain trying to do everything. Maybe that had been why he’d felt so comfortable with Alexei. He’d known if things went off the rails, there was someone else there.
“I’m glad,” Wolf said, starting toward the store. “If there’s anyone who deserves a good night, it’s you. Now let’s go look at some butt plugs. We need to get a whole training set, and Willie experiments with some exotic lubricants. Don’t worry. Nell tests them all for parabens, whatever those are. She’s pronounced them organic and cruelty free. Well, not the ginger one. She said that one stung.”
Yep, Nell was a freak. It kind of made him more comfortable around her. Next time she threatened him with endless rounds of conversation he would inquire whether or not she was wearing a butt plug that day. That might mess up her game play.
Excellent. He wouldn’t be unprepared for their next round.
The growl of motorcycles rumbled through the air as
a swarm of Harleys made their way into the “parking lot.”
Wolf waved for him to get inside. “Come on, man. You do not want to mess with those guys.”
There were about twenty bikes being parked, and six of them had more than one rider. The helmets started to come off and Caleb couldn’t help but stare. The men were all wearing leather vests that proudly proclaimed them the Old Geezers of the Rockies.
“Yeah don’t mess with us, young man,” a guy who had to be in his mid-nineties said, reaching out his hand for his…yep, that was his old lady. She was maybe eighty-five on the generous side, and she was wearing a tank top and no bra. “We’re one percenters.”
The woman at his side grinned, and when she did that she proved that age should be judged on so much more than a mere number. “He calls us that because we’ve got about one percent of our lives left.”
“Then we should party!” another called out.
There wasn’t a single one who could possibly be under seventy-five.
Caleb smiled. These people were living. They were giving a big old finger to the world and gave not one fuck what anyone thought.
Alexei would think they were cool.
He’d just thought about calling Alexei and telling him about the experience.
“That big old truck yours?” one of the OGs asked Wolf.
Wolf nodded gamely.
“Get out of your cage, son,” the man said. “Get a bike and see the world. Time’s a wasting.”
It was. And suddenly Caleb didn’t want to miss a minute of it.
He jogged to the steps. He had a set of butt plugs to buy.
* * * *
Three hours later, Alexei parked Holly’s tiny torture device in the back of Stella’s and began to walk up Main Street. Useless. The whole morning had been useless. He looked up as he heard another car stop.
“Hey, we lost track of you last night. I take it things went well with Ms. Lang?” Jessie asked, getting out of the white SUV they’d rented. She’d changed into slightly different colored slacks and a pristine white shirt.
