by Megg Jensen
I admit I had trouble tearing my eyes away from the men who’d snuck here from my homeland, been caught, and arrested for violating the treaty. I was here as an honored adoptee, the hope for the future relations between our people. Other than the two boys who were here for the same reasons, I had never seen anyone who looked like me. I was fascinated by their red hair and pale skin, so much like mine, and so unlike the dark haired, olive skinned Fithians.
“I wonder why they came here, Mags,” I said to Queen Margaretta, the lady I served and my secret best friend. She was only a few years older than me and one of the only people in Fithia who didn’t treat me like trash. “Didn’t they know that coming here will only get them killed?”
She shrugged. I couldn’t help notice how vibrant she looked, even though she’d recently given birth to her third son. Her dark ringlets glowed in the dim, candlelit room. “The king didn’t make me aware of their reasons. I know little more than you.”
The drums beat out a rhythm I’d only been told about, a steady, deep pound that reverberated through my body, warning the spectators the execution was about to begin. I’d heard rumors the men would be drawn and quartered too. My stomach turned, but I reminded myself they’d crossed the clearly marked boundaries. They should have known the consequences. It was their own fault.
I fingered the side of the curtains, the heavy frayed damask littering small strands onto the floor, but I stopped myself short of actually pulling back the panel. The musicians in the room struck up a rousing song and we couldn’t hear the drums anymore.
“If you insist on seeing this, then stick your head through the curtains. I don’t want to hear any of it though,” Mags said. I wasn’t surprised she gave in to me. Mags was strong spirited, but so was I. We chose our battles and this was one she knew I wouldn’t give up on.
Clutching the curtains, I stuck my head between the two panels. I caught a faint whiff of decay. The curtains were older than me and their musty scent assaulted my nose, but I didn’t care. I saw the men again, sunbeams sparkling off their red hair. Wild and unkempt, their leather clothes bespoke of a land far more brutish than this one and each of them looked straight ahead into the crowd. Not one appeared afraid and I wondered if they felt the same trembling in their stomachs that I felt in mine.
The drumbeat accelerated and my heart sped up, keeping time with it. I didn’t want to look, but I couldn’t turn away.
“For crossing the borders illegally, you have been sentenced to death.” King Rotlar’s voice, as big as his girth, boomed from his golden throne. He must have had his servants bring it outside for the big occasion. His voice carried as the crowd fell silent. “After the hanging you will be quartered, then your bodies sent back to your homeland in disgrace. Hopefully your people will remember who won the war.”
The men didn’t acknowledge the king; they only stared ahead into the crowd, their gazes never wavering. If they weren’t afraid then they were the bravest men I’d ever seen. Knowing death was imminent, they showed no emotion.
Three of the king’s guard marched up behind the horses, each holding a whip in the right hand.
“On the count of three,” the guard on the right yelled. “One! Two! Three!”
The whips cracked simultaneously on the horses’ rumps and they ran forward, only breaking to the side once they spied the barrier separating them from the crowd. My eyes flickered back to the men, their lifeless bodies hanging from the nooses. I’d heard other people whisper that their necks would break as soon as the horses raced off. From the angle their heads limped, I believed it.
I pulled back and the curtains grazed my body, like it was giving me a light hug. I could use one after seeing that.
“Is it done?” Mags asked. I nodded my head.
“You may leave,” she said to the musicians, waving her hand at them.
The lead guitarist bowed his head and motioned to his fellow performers. Without a sound, they left the chambers, leaving Mags and I alone with her infant son, Trevin.
“How is Trevin feeling today?” I asked, wiggling my finger above his nose. He cooed and giggled at me, his pink cheeks puffing in and out. I needed to remind myself of my reality, to pull away from what I’d just seen. His color was better today. After Trevin’s birth, his skin turned yellow. We’d feared the worst, but after a few days under the bright sunlight, at the direction of the ancient midwife, his color returned.
“He’s good. Noisy. Doesn’t sleep. Screams. Exactly like his older brothers did.” Mags sank back into a lush pillow. “I’m so tired.”
“Why don’t you have someone take care of him at night?” I asked. “You’re perfectly within your rights. You are the queen, you know.”
Mags smiled, sat up in bed and craned her head over Trevin’s bassinette.
“I know, but there are so many things I’m not allowed to do anymore. I can’t make plans to see my old friends or join them in a tavern for a quick drink. But I can keep my sons at my side for as long as possible. I am their mother. They can’t take that away from me.”
She loved her sons fiercely. Anyone could see that. The two older boys, Daniel and Matthew, slept in the chamber across the hall from her so she could help them at night if one of them woke up from a nightmare or was sick. The last queen had fostered her son out as soon as he was weaned. King Rotlar barely knew his mother. He thought Mags’ attachment to her boys was unhealthy and frequently insisted she’d have to give them up. But so far, he hadn’t done anything. Just yelled, as he did about most things.
“You’re a great mother,” I answered. “Don’t let anyone tell you that sending your boys away is better than keeping them close to you.”
Mags picked up Trevin and cradled him in her arms, but she focused her gaze on me.
“I’m sorry you’re here against your will. I know you can’t leave for another four years. I’m sure you wonder about your family and why they gave you up.”
She always thought about someone other than herself. My heart swelled as I looked at my friend. The queen. This was the last place I’d ever expected to find a friend, but in a way, we’d found each other. Her life was as restricted as mine, even more in some ways.
While she was never allowed to leave the castle alone, at least I could slip out for some secret hand-to-hand combat training with my boyfriend Kellan and his adoptive father, Aric.
“I don’t blame them.” I fingered the silken blanket on her bed. The intricate stitching illustrated an arboreal scene. Our castle was surrounded by forest on three sides and an expansive river on the fourth. I avoided it as much as possible, preferring my feet to stay on dry land.
“I’m sure I was chosen for a reason,” I said. “When I go home, maybe I’ll be elevated as an advisor or ambassador. Maybe my people were promised something in return.”
“They considered it an honor to give their children up to us,” Mags whispered, her eyes downcast. “Or so I’m told.”
“You don’t believe that?”
Mags had doubts? My heart pounded. We’d been friends for a couple years, but we’d never talked about my homeland. Not once. I wasn’t sure I wanted to. Not after what I’d witnessed today.
“I don’t know what to believe, Lianne. There’s so much we’ve been taught about the war that doesn’t make sense. And as a mother, I can’t imagine ever giving up my children, no matter how politically advantageous it is.”
I held up my hand and Mags stopped talking. “I’ve heard it all before. No need to tell me the rest. I’m sure I’ll find out someday why my parents gave me up, but talking about it isn’t going to lead to any answers. I have to wait.”
Mags looked at me with sad, dark eyes, and nodded in agreement. Then, as if to signal the close of the topic, she held up her index finger, and spun it around in the air, motioning me to turn around. It was time for Trevin’s mid-morning snack. I averted my eyes. We were friends, but I didn’t want to see her nursing Trevin, and she understood it made me uncomfortable.
/> I stood and wandered to the window. The crowds milled about, not yet breaking up even though the men’s bodies were already removed from the courtyard. I looked out on the river in the distance. Leagues upriver the border to my homeland would be guarded, posts every five miles or so with tall towers. A byre laid in wait in each tower, to be lit in case of an emergency. Within moments a signal of fire would be seen and the next would be lit. They would know in a few moments of an attack from my people.
Yet an attack never came. They were subdued. Quiet. Obedient. Yet these three men came. They weren’t brandishing swords or leading an army. We hadn’t heard why they were here, only that they broke the treaty and were sentenced to death.
“You can look again.” I turned back. Mags’ gown now covered part of Trevin’s head.
“Do you really think it isn’t an honor for them to give us up?” I asked, going back to our conversation. I changed my mind. Maybe I wasn’t quite ready to stop talking about it. “We’ve been told to believe it was an honor for our parents.”
There were days I wasn’t sure what was true. I had trouble reconciling what I was told by my teachers and what I felt in my gut. The peaceful river out the window or the stories of violence and death — which was the truth?
Mags pulled Trevin out from under her gown and stroked his hair. A little milk pooled on his chin and his gums smacked together in satisfaction. I smiled at him. His olive skin, so smooth like his mother’s, always charmed me. Whenever I held him in my arms, I reveled in the contrast. His skin dark and mine, so pale.
“You shouldn’t always believe what you’re told,” she said. “I’ve heard things, seen things, you wouldn’t believe. Being the king’s wife gives me accessibility to the most interesting discussions. Being a woman makes me invisible. They are quick to ignore me, but I listen anyway.”
Mags fluffed up her pillow again and scooted back against it. I wondered if she grew bored with lying down all the time, but it was customary for the queen to stay down for at least three months after giving birth. Kings wanted to be sure their wives would be healthy to bear more boys. Mags had proven her reproductive worth by producing three boys.
“I’m going to eat soon. Do you want to stay here with me or take some time to meet up with Kellan?” Mags asked. “I’m guessing with the confusion of the hanging, no one is going to notice if you two spend a little time together.”
A smile spread across my face. I couldn’t help it. Everything was so new with us and I stole every moment I could to be with Kellan. I’d followed him around like a puppy for years and he’d only recently paid attention to me. A blush crept across my face. He did far more than pay attention to me now.
“Thank you!” I pushed the hanging, and my homeland, to the back of my mind. It was over and it wasn’t like I knew those men. We had no real connection.
“And if you see your sister,” Mags said, “send her here. She didn’t show up this morning and we need to have a little chat.”
I nodded, not caring what Albree did this time. Kellan and I had unfinished business and I had a lesson to teach him.
Chapter Two
The muscle in his forearm twitched as he readied himself for the attack. Backhand, probably, from the position of his arm. He could easily swing it around to a forehand punch but my reflexes were faster, more finely tuned. I could block him with little effort, duck down, and spin while kicking my leg out. He’d be on the ground in seconds.
I wanted to grin, but I held back. Instead I stood firm in my fighting stance, waiting for him to make the first move. I had him again.
“I love you, Lianne,” he said, trying to distract me. His sideways grin usually melted my insides, but not now. I refused to look at his face while we sparred. I couldn’t believe he’d think that would work on me. My toes dug into the dirt floor. I wouldn’t lose my grip, not now.
Kellan’s hand flew toward my face and the scene played out just as I thought it would. He fell backward while his arms jerked out to the sides, slapping the floor. We did this to break the fall otherwise we’d hurt our backs all the time.
I giggled, seeing his eyes close and tighten as frustration took over. After all these years, he still had a hard time believing a girl could beat him. Lucky for him, no one had ever seen him lose. Girls weren’t allowed to fight, especially not an adoptee like myself. Technically he wasn’t allowed to fight either, but since he was adopted by the arms master, he was given some leeway to assist with training. Everyone knew he could deliver a hard blow. My skills remained a secret.
“Why do you insist on torturing me, Lianne?” He rolled on his side and his red hair flopped over his forehead. His light blue eyes peered at me from underneath the curtain of his hair. If magic hadn’t been bled from our people after the war, I would swear he had cast a spell over me.
I collapsed next to him on the floor of his father’s private training room. The sweet tang of his sweat drifted into my nose and glistened on his chest. I wanted to touch him, but our relationship was too new, too precious, for me to reach for him first. It had only been a month since his sixteenth birthday, the night when he seemed to see me for the first time. Well, at least see me as a girl and not a sparring partner.
“Come here.” Kellan rolled on his side and pulled me into his arms. He kissed the top of my forehead as I eased my way into his embrace. My heart pounded and my body tingled. Closing my eyes, I snuggled my face into his neck, smelling an adorable mixture of dirt and oranges. Was this real? If it wasn’t, I didn’t want to know.
“Your birthday is tomorrow,” he whispered in my ear. “I have a surprise for you.”
“One hint?” I begged.
“Patience,” he said, running his fingers through my hair. I shivered and hoped he didn’t notice. I had no experience with other boys. In my mind, Kellan was the only boy worth hoping for.
As for him, well I didn’t know if he’d loved other girls before me.
I was the only female adoptee in the palace, but I’d seen the native girls gaze under their dark eyelashes at his height and porcelain skin. I didn’t blame them for wanting something different from the native Fithian boys. The three of us were oddities, exotic oddities. Of course, wanting and having were two different things. We weren’t allowed to intermarry with them. It was punishable by death, or worse, banishment back to our homeland. With only three adoptees, it wasn’t a hard rule to enforce.
“Why?” I asked him. “Why did you see me, as a girl not just a friend? On your birthday, I mean?” I knew I sounded like an idiot. My cheeks flamed at my stupid questions.
But Kellan smiled. He knew what I meant, like he could read my mind. “Let’s just say I had an epiphany on my birthday. I’ll tell you more on yours. It’s part of your surprise.”
It wasn’t exactly what I wanted to hear and really didn’t make much sense, but as long as I was in his arms I didn’t care.
“Will you two get up off the floor?” A shrill voice from behind interrupted us.
Kellan rolled over, not letting me out of his arms. I looked over his shoulder and saw my sister standing in the doorway. My adopted sister, Albree. Curvy and petite, just like the rest of the native girls. Her dark ringlets hung over her shoulders, cascading over her shoulder and resting between the cleavage of her low-cut gown. It reminded me so much of Mags’ hair, well except I thought Mags was beautiful and Albree made my stomach turn. She’d never been kind to me, neither had our mother.
“It’s disgusting. You could be related, you know. You look enough alike to be.” Albree sauntered over to us, her hips swaying with every step. I couldn’t watch her without being reminded how plain I was compared to her.
I was supposed to be grateful for being adopted, being saved from starvation and poverty as part of the post-war agreement, but I wasn’t. Albree never let me forget I was different; never let me believe for a moment I could fit in.
“Is there a problem here?” Kellan’s father Aric strode into the fighting practice room.
“No sir.” Albree dropped into a curtsey. Her mother was only a lady-in-waiting, below Aric in social status. Kellan and I never received any respect from Albree, but she followed courtly behavior better than anyone we knew. Our mother pounded it into her brain from the day she was born. Albree never forgot her station, which is what made her feel she could pick on me whenever she wanted. She may not be ranked higher than a lot of people in the castle, but she believed she was better than me.
“You two.” He pointed to us with a beefy finger. “Up off the floor.”
Kellan released his grip, but stroked the back of my arm quickly with his thumb. The shivers raced over my skin again. We’d only been together a month and still there were days I felt like I needed to pinch myself. Kellan and me, a couple? It was unreal. We stood and Kellan slung his arm around my shoulders.
“Albree, if you’re not out of here in two seconds I’m going to inform your mother that instead of doing your duties you were spying on the crown’s honor guard.” Aric took his duties very seriously. Even though my people, the Dalagans, who fled and lived in exile in the desert and were subservient to the whims of the Fithians, no longer fought back, the Fithian army practiced every day, never resting to protect their kingdom.
That’s what I’d been taught, at least. Dalagans were bad. Fithians were good. The victors determined history and my people had no voice. I was sure that’s the way it always worked. I wanted to know both sides of the story, but I’d resigned myself to the fact that I’d probably never know.
“Mags was looking for you this morning too, Albree. She told me if I saw you to let you know you’re expected,” I said.
Albree ignored me, sashayed over to Kellan, and ran her fingernail down his arm. I watched for goose bumps, but they didn’t come. He was a master at controlling his feelings. Almost anyone would respond to a touch like that, even if it was to shudder in revulsion. Instead Kellan stood still and stared over Albree’s head to the wall behind her.
