by Gwyneth Rees
After Scarlett had finished using her flea-comb, the cats set to work putting the flea-filled hairballs back on the table – along with the recipe itself. As Tani nudged the last hairball back into place, they heard a noise coming from the chimney.
The cats ran off and hid just as Selina Slaughter landed on the cushion with a thud.
She seemed in a good mood as she picked herself up and walked over to the table. ‘Still here, my dears?’ she joked to her prisoners.
The two cats spat at her, which just made her laugh.
‘What are you going to do with those?’ Scarlett demanded, pointing at a bundle of envelopes that Selina was holding, which seemed to have names written on them in green ink.
Selina gave her a gappy grin. ‘Shouldn’t you be more concerned with what I am going to do with you, my dear?’ she teased. ‘Still . . . since you can’t do anything to stop me, I’ll tell you. I am going to fill up these envelopes with hairballs and send them off to my helpers who will distribute them to all the lucky witches my friend Sybil has selected to escape with her. You see, the prisoners are sent out in groups to do their community service – either out on the street or in flea clinics. My accomplices and I will dress up as old ladies, or as witches with flea-ridden cats, and secretly slip each witch a hairball. I have the pleasure of taking Sybil’s to her at the clinic just around the corner, and she says that as I’m such a dear friend she’d be honoured if I’d spit on hers myself! Then, at four o’clock precisely, all the witch-prisoners will swallow their hairballs – at which point their saliva will react with the other ingredients and they will be de-tagged! And then they will escape! Sybil has promised to strangle whichever cat is with her at the time, which should be super fun!’ She started to cackle loudly.
Scarlett gaped at her. ‘You mean the anti-tagging spell is for them?’
‘Of course!’ Selina narrowed her eyes. ‘How do you know the name of it? I haven’t shown you the recipe!’
‘It was just a guess,’ Scarlett told her quickly. ‘You know, it’s a very good plot . . . I mean, Wow! It really is! But you still won’t get away with it. Even if all those witches do escape, they won’t be allowed to get far. The good witches will go out looking for them and they’ll all be caught in no time. And then you’ll be arrested too!’
‘Oh, but the good witches won’t have time to look for us, I’m afraid,’ Selina said smugly. ‘You see, we’ve prepared a little distraction for them – something to keep them occupied while we make our escape. It involves a rather nasty airborne spell that attacks babies, especially those with clipped toenails. The good witches will be kept very busy trying to reverse that spell before it does permanent damage – and if you want to know what sort of damage, then imagine having a baby brother who says oink oink and has a little pink curly tail!’ Selina started to cackle even louder.
Scarlett felt furious – and she also felt scared. ‘If you hurt Spike, Mum and Dad and Aunt Bunty will all come after you. They won’t stop until they find you!’
‘I was worried about that,’ Selina agreed, pausing in mid-cackle to catch her breath. ‘That’s why I’ve decided to keep you as my hostage. I’ll tell your parents that if they try and find me, their precious daughter will come to a very sticky end!’
‘You’re really evil!’ Scarlett gasped.
‘Thank you, my dear, but I’m afraid that flattery will get you nowhere,’ Selina replied smoothly. ‘Now . . . I really must stop all this idle chit-chat and get to work.’
She started to fill up the envelopes with hairballs, muttering a few witchy words over each one before tapping it lightly with her wand to send it off up the chimney on its way to whichever of her witch cronies was expecting it. Finally she placed the last four hairballs into her own envelope and put it in her pocket along with her wand. Then she turned to face her prisoners.
‘Now,’ she told them, ‘I need that final hairball.’ She squatted down and peered inside the cage at her two cat captives. ‘I suppose I shall have to take one of you with me to visit Sybil. Who wants to volunteer?’
When both cats shrank back, she laughed and pointed a long green fingernail at Mia. ‘Actually I think I’d better take you, my dear. We haven’t got much time and it will be much easier for Sybil to cut through your tender layers than that big fat tomcat’s.’
Albert-of-the-street started to protest indignantly that he wasn’t fat, but he suddenly thought better of it and kept quiet.
Felina, however, could hold back no longer. Before Selina had the chance to go anywhere near her kitten she leaped forward and bit the witch as hard as she could on her ankle. Tani leaped out of the shadows and bit the other ankle, and Mephisto and Cosmo came out from their hiding places and jumped on to her shoulders where they sank their teeth in as well.
Selina howled and screamed and danced about the room, eventually kicking off Felina and Tani, and shaking off Cosmo. Mephisto held on for longer until she managed to grab hold of his tail and pull it so hard that he was forced to loosen his grip. As soon as she had freed herself she made for the chimney and shot up it as fast as she could. Luckily, she was wearing her rocket-thruster shoes.
The cats were left trapped in the cellar below.
After she had reached the top, Selina called down to them angrily. ‘I’ll deal with you later!’
Then the cats heard the fireplace swinging back into place and she was gone.
‘When her plan backfires and all her friends get turned into frogs she’s going to be even more angry,’ Scarlett said. ‘We’ve got to get out of here before she comes back.’
‘Maybe the other cats will have sent for help by now,’ Felina said.
‘Don’t count on it,’ Mephisto said gloomily. ‘That traitor Cattrap has probably got them all involved in another one of his ridiculous competitions by this time. I expect they’ve forgotten all about us.’
‘Cleo’s not that bad, Father,’ Cosmo said now. ‘I don’t think he meant us any harm. He just got fooled into helping Selina because she offered to give him something he really wanted.’ And even though he had promised he’d keep it a secret, he decided to tell the others what Cleo had told him the previous night. Maybe then, if they ever got out of here, his father wouldn’t be so hard on Cleo.
‘I bet she wasn’t planning on doing anything at all to alter his face,’ Tani said after she had listened to the story.
‘Or maybe she was . . .’ said Felina, who had found another spell recipe lying on the edge of the table, and had been busy reading it while the other cats were talking. ‘This is a spell to make a cat grow a long pointy nose.’
‘Cleo asked for a shorter nose, not a longer one,’ Cosmo said. ‘Selina must be planning to trick him as well.’
‘Serves him right, the fluffed-up fool,’ Mephisto grunted.
Just then they heard a grating noise above them as if the fireplace was moving again. Then they heard a familiar miaow – a miaow that made Mephisto instantly start hissing – and they realized that Cleo himself was there.
Cleo tumbled down the chimney and Mephisto pounced on him immediately. ‘Come to gloat, have you? Or were you expecting your friend Selina to be here waiting for you?’
But to their surprise, Cleo was closely followed by Bunty, who landed with a thud on the cushion beside him.
‘Aunt Bunty!’ Scarlett cried out.
‘What are you doing here, Scarlett?’ Bunty gasped.
Scarlett quickly told her what had happened. ‘But how did you know where to find me?’
‘I didn’t. I came here to look for the cats.’ Apparently Cleo had got worried when the other cats hadn’t returned to the school, and had gone to the Two-Shoes’ house to see if they were there. That was how he had met Bunty, who was there looking for Scarlett. ‘When Cleo told me what had happened I alerted the Good Witches’ Society and came straight here,’ Bunty explained.
‘How did you find the hidden chimney?’ Scarlett asked.
‘I nearly didn’t . . .
until Cleo mentioned that when he visited Selina for tea, the fireplace seemed to be moving as he was shown into the room. That was what made me think there might be a downwards chimney.’ Bunty was kneeling down beside the cage door as she spoke, examining the padlock. Now she took her wand out of her pocket and tapped the padlock with the tip of it, muttering the words of an unlocking spell at the same time. Immediately the end of her wand became key-shaped.
Bunty quickly unlocked the door and released Scarlett and the two cats.
‘Aunt Bunty, we’ve found out why all the witch-babies’ toenails were stolen,’ Scarlett said. ‘A hundred witches, including Sybil, are going to use the Broom sisters’ anti-tagging spell to escape while they’re doing their community service today. And Selina is planning to set loose another spell on all the babies afterwards. But don’t worry, because we’ve already thought of a way to stop them!’ Scarlett quickly showed her aunt the anti-tagging recipe, which Sybil had left lying on the table, and explained how they had added fleas to the spell in order to render it useless.
Bunty shook her head in amazement as she heard about the Great Escape plan. ‘I can’t believe Sybil and Selina thought they could get away with this. Well it’s too late to stop the witches leaving prison for the afternoon – they’ll all have started their community service by now. But perhaps we’d better warn them that their escape plan is doomed and give them the chance to go back to prison rather than be turned into frogs.’
‘I think we should let them be changed into frogs,’ Mephisto said. ‘Frogs don’t taste very nice, but they make very good playthings – especially if they’re good hoppers.’
‘I’m not sure what the Good Witches’ Society will say about that, Mephisto,’ Bunty said, smiling. She quickly waved her wand and two pairs of rocket-thruster shoes appeared – one adult-sized and one child-sized. ‘Scarlett and I will carry you all up the chimney and then we’d better go and tell the other good witches what’s been happening. After that, I think a trip to Sybil’s flea-clinic is in order. I don’t suppose any of you wants to come with me and pose as my flea-ridden cat, do you?’
And every paw in the room shot up at once.
13
The flea-clinic where Sybil and four other prisoners were working as reluctant volunteers had five de-fleaing rooms and a waiting room. At the moment one customer in particular was spending a long time with Sybil. If anyone had looked in on them, they would have seen that the customer didn’t even have a cat inside her basket, although she had pretended to talk to one while she was in the waiting room. (‘Don’t you worry, pusskins, we’ll have those fleas removed in no time – there’s no need to hide under that blanket!’)
The customer was Selina Slaughter, and now that she was alone with Sybil she had dumped the basket on the floor. She was grinning as she carefully placed Sybil’s hairball, which had the green toenails sticking out of it and which Selina had just spat on, into a plastic bag before handing it to Sybil.
‘The spell will work as soon as you and this hairball come into contact,’ Selina told her friend. ‘But wait until four o’clock before you actually touch it – then everyone will be escaping at the same time. I’ll be waiting outside the window with your broomstick. I’ve just managed to slip hairballs to the witches in the next three rooms, but whoever’s in the room at the end will have to do without, I’m afraid. We’re one hairball short.’
‘Murdina Broom is in the end room,’ Sybil said. ‘She did promise to give me that special spell after we’d escaped – but never mind! I’m sure I can find another way of disposing of that pesky Cosmo.’
‘I can try and make one of the other three witches give up their hairball if you like,’ Selina suggested.
‘Oh, don’t trouble yourself. Murdina’s been getting on my nerves in any case. She keeps boasting about how this Great Escape plan is really down to her brilliance rather than mine, because she provided the spell recipe. This will serve her right!’
Selina left Sybil with her hairball – now fully activated – and on her way out through the waiting room she didn’t look at the other witches who were there. If she had done, she would have noticed Bunty and a smaller person who was hiding under a large red cloak. The two had just arrived and were sitting with a cat basket on the seat between them. Bunty had already spoken to the prison guard, who had now gone outside to make an urgent call on her mobile.
‘The Good Witches’ Society said they’d report the Great Escape plot to the prison governor,’ Bunty said to Scarlett who had slipped off her cloak as soon as Selina had gone. ‘But there probably won’t be time for all the guards to be alerted.’ She looked at her watch. ‘It’s nearly four o’clock now.’
‘You mean the guards won’t be able to stop the bad witches getting turned into frogs?’ Scarlett said.
‘If Sybil and her friends persist in trying to escape, there’ll be nothing the guards can do about it,’ Bunty replied.
‘I don’t want to miss seeing that!’ Cosmo mewed enthusiastically from inside his basket.
‘I suppose I should really go and warn Sybil while there’s still time,’ Bunty said. ‘Scarlett, you’d better stay here. What takes place at four o’clock might not be a pretty sight. In fact, I’m not sure you should really witness it either, Cosmo.’
‘I’m not squeamish,’ Cosmo protested. ‘Mia and I dissected a frog the other day, because Professor Felina wanted to show us how the inside bits of frogs are different from the inside bits of mice. We’re doing toads next week.’
Bunty sighed. ‘Sometimes I forget you’re a cat, Cosmo. Why would you be squeamish? Come on then.’ And she lifted up the cat basket and knocked on the door of Sybil’s room.
‘Come in! Come in!’ Sybil called out in her best, fake-nice voice. When she saw who it was, she couldn’t have been more delighted. ‘Why, Bunty, my dear, what a surprise to see you again so soon. Have you brought that old witch-cat of yours . . . I forget his name . . . to be de-flead?’
‘My witch-cat is not at all old,’ Bunty said sharply, ‘nor does he have fleas. This is one of my sister’s cats, who you already know very well.’
As Bunty opened the lid of the cat basket, Sybil shrieked with delight when she saw which cat it was. ‘Cosmo!’ She had to struggle to keep her hands from slipping into a strangling grasp as she glanced at the clock, which said that it was two minutes to four. ‘I find I work better if the little dears are left alone with me,’ she told Bunty slyly, as her hand felt about in her pocket to check that her hairball was still there.
‘I don’t think that’s a very good idea, Sybil,’ Bunty said. ‘Anyway, we aren’t here for your de-fleaing services. You see, we know all about your escape plan.’
At that moment the prison guard knocked on the door and came in. ‘I’ve just spoken to the governor, Sybil. She says that if you’re part of this Great Escape attempt, then you’d better forget it. The spell won’t work. You’ve been found out.’
Bunty quickly asked the guard if she had told the other witches.
‘Yes, but they think it’s a bluff. They’re all acting as cool as cucumbers, apart from Murdina Broom, who seems very agitated.’
‘Of course it’s a bluff!’ snapped Sybil, who had now moved closer to the open window. ‘Somehow you’ve got wind of our plan, but I’m afraid you’re too late!’ And she took the hairball from her pocket, tipped it out of its bag and cradled it in her palm, at which point it began to give off a faint greenish glow. Then, just for good measure, she popped it into her mouth and swallowed it.
Before the others could stop her, she jumped up on to a chair (that she had already placed under the window) and was about to leap outside, when the electronic tag attached to her ear started to beep loudly. There was just time for Sybil’s face to contort into a furious scream before she turned green all over and green sparks started to shoot out of her body in all directions. Then her scream turned into a croak, and the next thing they saw was a large frog hopping right off the chair and o
ut through the window.
Almost instantly they heard a disgusted shriek from outside. They rushed over to look and found Selina crouching underneath the window with a large croaking frog perched on her head. Still squealing, she reached up and swiped it on to the ground where it hopped away quickly into the bushes. Three other frogs could also be seen hopping away across the grass, and only Murdina Broom was left, her earring tag still in place, staring out of the window in total shock.
And so in one afternoon the local frog population was increased by nearly a hundred and, as the local cat population was to comment later, all the new frogs seemed to be exceptionally good hoppers.
The other cats were still waiting to hear what had happened, so Bunty dropped Cosmo back at his house before taking Scarlett up to the hospital to see her parents.
Cosmo climbed up on to the kitchen table and told his audience of Mephisto, Tani, Felina, Mia, Hagnus and Matty the whole story of how Sybil had been turned into a frog, and how Selina had been arrested immediately afterwards. Then he jumped down and went upstairs to repeat everything to India, who was lying down in the Moses basket in the bedroom.
‘It sounds like you were very brave, Cosmo,’ his mother told him. ‘I’m very proud of you. But you also look like you could do with a good wash. Come here and let me lick you.’
‘I think I’m old enough to lick myself clean from now on, Mother,’ Cosmo said, staying where he was. ‘Anyway, you’re going to have plenty of other kittens to wash soon, aren’t you?’
‘Very soon, I think,’ India agreed. ‘Go and get your father, will you, Cosmo? Tell him I think it’s nearly time.’
Cosmo hurried back downstairs to find that Mephisto, Felina and Tani were having a heated discussion about something, and that Mia, Matty and Hagnus were racing excitedly around the room.
