by Becca Van
And then the nightmare changed.
Lilac was no longer the sixteen-year-old girl trying to fight off the boy intent on raping her.
She was standing in a strangely familiar room, and when she looked down she noticed the blanket covered in teddy bears. Her heart was racing and she wanted to scream for her mommy, but she was too scared to call for her.
She didn’t even notice she was lying on her belly, hiding under the coffee table until she tried to sit up and hit her head. She wanted to cry when she hurt herself, but she put her clenched fist in her mouth and bit down. She couldn’t make a noise or the bad men would see her.
Her mommy was crying on the floor, and the bad men were hitting and kicking her. She pulled her fist from her mouth and was just about to crawl over to her mother, but Mommy shook her head.
Tears rolled down her face as she watched the bad men hurt her mommy over and over again. Just before her mommy closed her eyes, she said, “I love you, Violet.”
The big man with the star on his chest kicked her mom one more time and then turned toward her. Violet curled into a small ball and hoped the man wouldn’t see her. The coffee table was lifted from over her and then crashed into the wall when the man with the star on his chest threw it.
Violet screamed and screamed when he grabbed her arm and lifted her from the floor.
“Shut up, you little bitch.” Star Man slapped her face, stunning her into silence.
Violet kept her eyes on her mommy as Star Man carried her toward the door and out of the house.
* * * *
Wilder was on his feet with gun in hand before he blinked the sleep from his eyes. He was instantly alert even though his vision took a few seconds to clear. He opened his bedroom door a crack and peered out into the hall. When he didn’t see anyone, he stepped out of his room and wasn’t surprised to see Cree and Nash with their weapons at the ready.
“Cree check the kitchen and living room,” Wilder whispered his order.
Cree nodded and walked silently down the hall.
“Nash search the laundry and back entrance.”
Nash was already moving before Wilder had finished giving his command.
Wilder stood in the hallway with his head canted as he listened intently. Something wasn’t right. Something out of the ordinary had woken him and his brothers. He glanced into his brothers’ bedrooms, his gaze zeroing in on the windows, but they were still closed.
His barefoot didn’t make any sound as he moved toward the spare bedroom where they’d left Lilac sleeping. Wilder was about to press his ear to the door but clasped the door handle instead when he heard a noise coming from her room.
With his gun ready, the safety off, he opened the door and scanned quickly. There was no one lurking about in the shadows and the adjoining bathroom door was still closed. He crept across the room, and after checking to make sure the en-suite was clear he turned to look at Lilac.
What he saw broke his fucking heart. She was curled up in a tight ball, tears streaming down her cheeks, and she was rocking in her sleep. What worried him most was the way she was sucking her thumb. He didn’t give a shit if that was a quirk she’d had left over from childhood, but he didn’t think it was.
Wilder’s instincts were going crazy. Only a very small child sucked their thumb. He moved closer to Lilac and sat on the edge of the bed. His first instinct was to lift her into his lap and wrap his arms around her, but he didn’t want to scare her.
“All clear,” Nash said as he entered the room.
“Nothing,” Cree whispered as he came in behind Nash.
“Lilac, wake up, sweetness. You’re having a bad dream.”
“Mommy, help me!” Lilac screamed after she pulled her thumb from her mouth and bolted upright.
“Fuck!” Cree groaned.
“Geezus.” Nash sighed.
Wilder shifted onto his knees on the mattress and cupped Lilac’s face between his hands. “You’re safe, Lilac. We won’t let anyone hurt you, sweetness. Come on, now. Wake up.”
She took a shuddering breath and blinked. Wilder knew she was finally out of her nightmare when the haze receded from her gorgeous violet eyes.
“I remembered,” she sobbed and then threw herself against him.
Wilder swallowed around the emotion constricting his throat as he wrapped his arms around her small body and hugged her tight. He shifted from his knees, back onto his ass at the edge of the mattress, and rocked back and forth, hoping the motion would calm her down. She was crying so hard her body was shaking and jerking, but what cut him up even more was that she didn’t make a sound, again.
“It’s okay, sweetness. I’ve got you.” Wilder glanced at his brothers and then nodded toward the pistol he’d left on the bedside table. He didn’t want Lilac seeing his gun and getting upset.
Cree hurried over, picked up Wilder’s gun, and after making sure the safety was on, left with Nash to put them away.
When Wilder felt Lilac slump against him and take a ragged breath, he knew she’d stopped crying. “I’m sorry. All I ever seem to do around you and your brothers is cry.”
“You have every reason to shed a few tears, sweetness.”
Lilac shifted on his thighs, wiped the tears from her face, and then gazed about the room. “Where am I?”
“You’re in our home, Lilac. You fell asleep in the truck, and since we didn’t want to be rude by going through your purse and into your house, we brought you to our spare room.”
“Thanks.” She pushed at his arms, and with a sigh of reluctance Wilder let her go. She scrambled from his lap and glanced at him before quickly looking away. He bit back a grin when he saw the blush suffusing her cheeks. Their Lilac was shy. He was glad that he’d decided to sleep in his boxers instead of in the nude like he usually did.
“Are you all right, Lilac?” Cree asked as he leaned against the door frame.
“Yes,” she whispered.
Nash shoved Cree out of his way and walked toward Lilac. He halted when she backed up. “I’d never hurt you, baby. Don’t be scared of me or my brothers.”
“What did you mean you remembered?” Wilder asked as he rose.
“It doesn’t matter,” Lilac said as she glanced toward the door.
“Of course it fucking matters,” Wilder said. “Anything to do with you matters, sweetness.”
“I need to go home.”
Wilder wasn’t about to let her leave after dropping that statement, and he didn’t like the pain he could see in those beautiful eyes.
“What you need to do is talk to us, Lilac. As of Monday, we are going to be deputies. If you have more information so we can find out who you are, then you have to tell us.”
“I already know who I am,” she shouted. “My mother is dead.”
Wilder grabbed hold of her waist when she started to collapse. He swept her up into his arms and held her tight against his chest. This time when she cried she sobbed loudly. The deep gut-wrenching sounds brought tears to his own eyes, and he had to clench his jaw to stave them off. When he glanced at Cree and Nash, he saw his brothers were hurting just as much as he was, but he knew it couldn’t be as bad as the pain Lilac was feeling.
He wanted to roar out his rage, but he swallowed around the lump in his throat instead and sank back down to sit on the mattress. Lilac wrapped her arm around his neck and buried her face against his neck. Her tears flowed fast plopping onto his bare shoulder before rolling down his back and chest. She gasped in a breath and cried even harder. Although he was glad she was finally crying like she should, he was worried she was going to make herself sick. He caressed a hand up and down her back trying to soothe her pain, and while he wanted to say something to comfort her, he knew nothing he said would ease the turmoil she was in.
After what seemed like forever, her tears slowed until she was hiccupping spasmodically and then she sighed with exhaustion.
“My name isn’t Lilac Primrose. It’s Violet Evans.”
“Are
you sure, baby?” Nash asked as he sat on the bed beside them.
“Yes. I’m positive.”
“Thank you for telling us, sweetness.” Wilder kissed the top of her head.
“Can I go home now?” Violet asked.
“If that’s what you want,” Cree answered.
“I do.” She took another deep breath and then stood.
Wilder rose, too. “You’re going to have to go and talk with Luke and Damon, Lil…Violet.”
“I will, but it’s late and I’m too tired right now.”
“Promise me you won’t put off talking to the sheriffs, sweetness,” Wilder demanded.
Violet spun to face him and poked him in the chest. “You don’t get to order me around.”
“I wasn’t trying to order you around, but if you want these bastards caught and put behind bars, you have to tell someone what happened. If you don’t want to talk with Luke and Damon, you can always come to us.”
“I’ll think about it.” Violet glanced about the room and when she spotted her purse up on the dresser walked over and grabbed it. “Thank you for taking care of me.”
Before Wilder could reply she raced down the hall and out the front door, slamming it closed behind her.
“Fuck!” Cree slammed his fist into the doorjamb before turning and racing toward the door. Wilder and Nash were on his heels. They all stepped out onto the porch and watched Lilac until she was safe inside before turning to enter their own home.
Wilder sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face. “Fuck is right!”
“Do you think we should call Luke?” Nash asked.
Wilder shook his head as he headed toward the fridge and snagged three beer bottles before handing two of them to his brothers. “We need to give her time to get her head around everything. If she hasn’t talked to them by Monday, we can step in.”
“She’s not going to let us in after tonight.” Cree sighed.
“What makes you think that?” Nash frowned.
“You didn’t see how she wouldn’t meet our gazes after telling us what her real name is?” Wilder asked.
“Shit! Yeah, I noticed.” Nash rubbed the back of his neck. “Do you think she’s going to take off?”
Wilder shook his head. “She’s a part owner of the diner.” Even as he spoke those words, he wasn’t sure he believed them.
He hoped like hell that he and his brothers got the chance to court Lilac…Violet into having a relationship with them.
Chapter Five
As soon as she opened her eyes and blinked the sleep from her gaze, she glanced at the clock and gasped with amazement. It was almost eleven o’clock in the morning and she only had a couple of hours until she needed to get to the diner. She flung the covers aside and headed for the shower. As she stood under the warm water she thought of Enya. She hoped her friend wasn’t annoyed that she hadn’t been there at four like she usually was to help her with the baking.
Normally Violet went back home just as the breakfast rush was hitting and then returned to the diner for the lunch and dinner crowd. Yesterday, she and Delta had swapped their schedules since Delta’s men had wanted to spend the morning with her.
As she dried off she thought of her mother. She couldn’t believe she’d forgotten how those men had broken into their home and then beaten her mother to death. At the time she’d thought her mother had fallen asleep, but now that she remembered she knew that wasn’t the case. Her mother’s eyes had been open and turned toward the ceiling, and she hadn’t been breathing. Her lips had been blue. When a sob escaped her mouth, she quickly pushed her thoughts aside. There was no time to wallow in the past. She needed to get to the diner for her shift.
When she was ready she grabbed her purse as well as the keys to her house and hurried out. Her gaze immediately went to the house next door but she quickly shifted her eyes to the pavement and walked rapidly. Her mind was in turmoil and she felt as if she would break down at any moment, but she didn’t have the time. She changed her thoughts to what was on the specials board for the day, but for the life of her she couldn’t remember.
Half an hour later, her mind still spinning in circles, Violet entered the diner. The noise of people laughing and talking while they ate felt so surreal, and though she was crying inside, she drew in a deep breath and pushed her turmoil aside.
She forced a smile to her lips when she entered the diner kitchen and, after greeting the others, wrapped an apron around her waist and got to work. Cooking normally helped her to relax but not today. Her gut was churning with nausea and she was feeling very shaky.
“Are you okay, Lilac?” Delta signed.
Her first instinct was to correct Delta about her rightful name but that would bring on all sorts of questions she wasn’t ready to answer. If she told Delta, Enya, and the other women working at the diner that she wasn’t who she’d thought she was, would they look at her differently? She wondered if she would ever get used to being called by a different name, when and if she did finally reveal her true name.
“I’m fine,” she answered and quickly turned back to the stove when Delta frowned.
“You don’t look fine,” Enya said as she glanced up from where she was mixing another batch of muffins.
Violet shrugged as she turned the steaks on the grill. She loved the industrial-sized stove where the pots were steaming, and although her stomach growled because of the tantalizing aromas, there was no way she could eat right now. Usually she had a piece of toast for breakfast before going about her normal routine, but as soon as she lifted the jelly-covered bread to her mouth, she started salivating and not because she was hungry. She’d dumped the piece of toast in the trash and slugged down her coffee before brushing her teeth and heading out.
Even though she worked through the lunch hour and had acknowledged Delta and Enya when they’d left, she had no idea what she’d said. The orders had slowed over the last half hour, and when she glanced at the clock on the wall she was surprised to see that it was almost closing time. Once she and Enya had decided to partner up with Delta, they’d lengthened the opening hours of the diner from seven till ten. She was weary to the bone and yet she knew she’d have trouble going to sleep. The thought of closing her eyes and seeing her mother lying beaten on the floor sent chills racing up and down her spine.
She glanced toward the door when Jaylynn brought another load of dirty dishes in.
“There are only a few people left and they’ve all finished their meals. Do you want me to help you clean up in here?”
Violet shook her head. “No, I’ll deal with the kitchen. If you could make sure everything is refilled and cleaned out in the diner that would be great.”
“Sure.” Jaylynn smiled and began filling the dishwashers before she headed out. Once they were running, Violet put all the leftover food into containers, refrigerated them, and started cleaning down the stove and counters. Once that was done she started scrubbing out the large cooking pots. Usually Katie, Kiara, or Jaylynn helped in the kitchen, but tonight she needed the monotonous chore to help her unwind.
It didn’t seem to matter that she’d had hours of uninterrupted sleep after leaving the Sheffields’ house. Violet was so tired she could barely stand up straight. Jaylynn came back in just as Violet was drying the last pot.
“Everything’s done. The floor’s been mopped, the tables and chairs are clean, and everything is set up for tomorrow morning.”
“Thanks, Jaylynn. Why don’t you head on home?” Violet suggested.
“Are you sure? I can stay if you want.”
She shook her head and forced a tired smile. “Thanks anyway, but there’s nothing left to do.”
“Okay.” Jaylynn smiled. “Do you want me to lock the front door?”
“No, I can do that when I leave.”
Jaylynn nodded and waved. “See you tomorrow.”
“Bye.” Violet watched the other woman hurry away and then glanced up at the fridge where tomorrow’s menu was written. Delta had
covered the front of the glass industrial fridge with clear contact paper, which she thought was a great idea. Whiteboard markers were used and could be wiped off.
When she read over the list of dishes, she double-checked to make sure they had all the ingredients. Once Violet realized she was stalling, she sighed with resignation. There was no reason for her to hang around the diner any longer, but going back to her lonely cottage wasn’t something she was looking forward to right now.
Violet was tired. Tired of being alone. Tired of being afraid. But she wasn’t sure she was brave enough to reach out to anyone other than her new work partners and employees. If she could, she had a feeling she would breathe, eat, and sleep work twenty-four hours a day, and although she knew that wasn’t healthy, she’d been doing just that for as long as she could remember.
She was twenty-five years old and had never celebrated her birthday beyond the first five years with her mom. That was sad in and of itself. Each year she’d nudged toward the age of sixteen had sent fear piercing her heart and soul. Ignoring the day she’d been born was easier to deal with.
After glancing about, she decided it was time to head out. She had half an hour’s walk ahead of her, and if she couldn’t sleep again, she would be up and back at the diner by four. It was already hedging toward midnight, and by the time she made it home, she would only get about three and a half hours of sleep under her belt.
Violet was used to dealing with the chores of the day with little to no sleep, but that didn’t mean she wasn’t exhausted to the bone. Some days she felt as if she was an eighty-year-old woman, or older. Since leaving that cult, all she ever had was herself and hard work, and she couldn’t see that changing anytime soon.
After turning the lights off and locking up, she started for her little two-bedroom cottage. Each step she took hurt her feet after she’d been on them all day long, but she was used to that, too. As she walked along the deserted street, her mind drifted back to that horrible place she left behind ten years ago.
