by E. S. Carter
Another tear follows the single track mark on her face.
“They rushed our girl straight into surgery barely telling us anything at all but words like meningitis were thrown around and we were asked to sign a form allowing them to operate on her leg.”
The breath she inhales is shaky and I can feel the years of pain bubble up to the surface so I use my other hand to cover hers and offer her strength in the only way I know how. She exhales loudly and continues with the story that obviously hurts to retell.
“The form was an agreement, signing over our rights as her parents to the doctors. It allowed them to operate as they saw fit in order to save her life. They mentioned to us they might need to remove part of her leg to save her, but we had no idea how much until the surgery was over.”
Her eyes catch mine before she blinks and looks away to the single window, her memories taking her back to that day.
“I’ve never felt as helpless as I did that day. I prayed and begged to every God I could think of to save our little girl. When the doctor came to us after the surgery, I knew it was bad. He told us how they made incisions all the way up her leg, trying to find healthy flesh, in order to cut the badness away. They got to her mid-thigh before they found anything but blackness and while I was sat praying to Gods I’ve never worshipped before, my baby was fighting to stay alive and having the majority of her leg cut away.”
A sob leaves her mouth and I wrap my free arm around her shoulders hoping to give her comfort.
“We didn’t see Nicola for almost a week. We left our little girl with anyone who would have her so we could stay by Lilah’s side, but even as Lilah recovered, the whole experience never actually seemed real.”
Her weary eyes rest on mine once more.
“I can clearly remember the exact moment it felt real. We’d not long brought Lilah home and the girls had received a rocking horse for Christmas, just a few weeks before. It was Lilah’s favourite toy. She kept saying ‘Horsey, horsey’ over and over so David picked her up and carefully sat her on the saddle, her face was beaming. She didn’t understand that she was unable to get on and off like she had before and David only took his eyes off her for a second when Lilah made a break for it and tried to climb off using the leg she didn’t even realise was gone.”
I can’t imagine what it must feel like to watch your little girl go through all that, but I do know who Lilah is now. “She’s stronger than any of us think.”
She huffs out a small laugh, “Oh, I know she is. Well, she was until Wayne got his claws into her. That was the second time I thought we’d lost her.”
This time, it’s her hand that squeezes mine when she feels my body stiffen.
“But I see our old Lilah coming back and I think you’re responsible for that, Harry. So I want to thank you because I can’t bear to think about losing her again.”
I open my mouth about to speak when a commotion from outside has us both jumping out of our seats and rushing towards the door.
Anita goes to open it and I still her hand, “Let me check, it’s a police station, after all, and I don’t want you getting caught in the middle of any criminals who are getting booked.”
She drops her grip on the handle and I ease open the door, making sure she’s safely behind me. The scene that greets us is not what I expected. David Tremere is being pinned against a wall by two beefy coppers while another three restrain a guy who is going absolutely crazy.
Wayne.
“Get your fucking hands off me! I’m going to kill the bitch and anyone who has anything to do with her,” he roars, bucking and throwing his head back in an attempt to make contact with any of the guys holding him back.
One of the officers pulls out his truncheon and warns Wayne to calm down or he’s going to use force to make him. Wayne responds by thrashing some more and letting out a stream of expletives. The copper doesn’t hesitate; he pulls back his hand and smacks Wayne straight behind the knees, making him buckle and land face first on the ground. The two other blokes are quickly on him, pinning him down by the shoulder blades with their whole body weight.
His furious eyes meet mine, and even though his face is pushed into the cold tile so hard, that he resembles a gummy bear that’s been stepped on, he still manages to grit out, “And you’re the first one who is going to get fucked up. Gimp lover.”
I don’t think about my actions as I charge forward, ignoring the futile attempts by Anita to hold me back. I don’t get within five feet of the fucker because the bloke with the truncheon who just took Wayne down, steps in front of me pushing both hands into my chest.
“Stand back, Mr Brown. We’ve got this under control.” His voice holds no argument. It’s a warning that he’ll take me down too if necessary and I really couldn’t give a fuck.
“You do not want to do this, Brown. Anything that you decide to attempt, right here, right now, is not only going to get you locked in a cell, it’s also going to give that,” he looks over his shoulder and tilts his chin towards Wayne, “man“-the disgust in his voice is obvious- “evidence of mistreatment while in custody. Now, you don’t want to do anything to jeopardise this case, do you, Mr Brown?”
All the fight leaves me; there is no way I’m letting that piece of shit get away with anything, even if I still want to beat him into a bloody pulp.
“Understood.” I make sure to catch the officer’s eye, “I get the message. You don’t need to worry about me.”
He waits for a beat before removing his hands then waits a few seconds more, still not trusting me to retreat.
“That’s right, you pussy. Walk away. I’ll still find you and my whore of a wife.”
I clench my fists so hard that I think I might break a finger or two, but I don’t turn around. I walk straight up to Anita and usher her back into the waiting room where she collapses into my arms and sobs.
Moments later, David is escorted into the room by an officer, and immediately takes over the comforting of his still sobbing wife.
He mouths ‘Thank you’ to me and leads Anita over to the chairs, where he wraps her up in his embrace, apologising for his behaviour and promising that everything is still going to be okay.
I slump down into a hard plastic chair. Adrenaline still coursing through my veins making my muscles ache with tension. Then realisation hits; they’ve got him. She’s finally safe.
Relief hits me like a tidal wave and my body hurts as each of my muscles relaxes. I shift back into the chair and look up at the ceiling, my mind spinning with possible ways to make Lils forget about all this.
I would love to take her away for a few days. Somewhere hot and secluded would be nice. Scrap that idea, I’ve only just started working for Nate; my first pay check isn’t for another few weeks, so I’m skint.
I’d love to be able to do what Jake did for Emma. Take her around the world, explore all the sights with her, show her what it’s like to start living again.
A memory pops into my head, it’s of my trip to Japan where we all joined Jake and Emma, and the day we visited the Meiji Shrine. The wishing tree and it’s never ending branches fill my vision, swaying gently in the breeze. The air there was so still and there was something so magical about the place, that even I felt a calmness wash over me.
I can remember staring at the tree for a long time before deciding to write down my wish. It was only a few days before that I’d got my cancer diagnosis and watching my friends, my family, happier than I’d ever seen them before, made my wish easy.
I want to live.
I didn’t beg, nor plead. I asked in the simplest way I could. I wanted to not only beat cancer’s arse, but I also wanted to live.
Lilah finally gave me that.
Although I got the all clear months ago, it wasn’t until I met Lilah that I finally felt alive.
My wish came true and now I vow to repay her by making all hers a reality.
David and Anita shoot up from their seats and when I drag my eyes from the ceiling, I can
see why.
Nicola and Lilah enter the room and are immediately smothered by their parents. Anita’s sobs turn from ones of despair to joy and I stand on the edges, waiting for my chance with my Bunny Girl.
I don’t have to wait long, as Lilah squeezes herself from out of their hold and rushes towards me. She all but jumps into my arms; both thighs squeeze my waist as I hook my hands under her bottom and hold her to me.
We don’t speak, we just are.
We stand silently until our heartbeats sync and our pulses slow, forgetting that there is anyone else in the room but us.
“As much as I love this public display of affection and your tight little body pressed against mine in this delicious way, I’d also like to know everything that’s happened. What did they say?” I speak the words into the soft skin of her neck, only loud enough for her to hear.
Her head lifts from my shoulder and her beautiful chocolate eyes shimmer, relief evident in her features. “I told them everything. They listened. They took all the evidence I saved up and then they cautioned me.”
I pull back abruptly, “They what?” Disbelief rages through my voice.
She strokes her hand down my face, brushes my lips with her fingertips before cupping my jaw with her palm.
“It’s the least they could do, given the circumstances. Marcus has promised it’s nothing to worry about and my cooperation means the caution will not escalate into a charge.”
“How fucking dare they, after everything you’ve been through.”
She silences my tirade with a kiss, then speaks against my lips, “Ssh, it’s over, it’s done. I don’t have to lay eyes on that man again until his case goes to court and I’ve been assured that with the evidence they now have against him and the stunt he pulled last night with Nic, that he will be going away for a very long time.”
I search her face for any worry, “What about his associates?”
She remains calm when she replies, “I don’t have enough information on any of those so nothing happens to them, but that’s a good thing, it means that they don’t have any reason to come after me. If Wayne decides to rat them out, that’s his business, not mine.”
“So it really is over?”
“For now, it really is over.”
Sweet relief.
I can’t help myself; I take her lips with mine and kiss away the day. Kiss away all the badness and kiss away the touch of any other man but me.
“Oh, for heaven’s sake, put him down, Lils. You don’t know where he’s been.”
We break apart with matching grins.
“I know exactly where he’s been.” Lilah retorts with a dirty wink in my direction before she unlocks her legs from my waist and I slowly let her slide down the front of my body to the floor.
When she turns around to face her family, I strategically place her in front of me to hide my significant boner.
“TMI, Lils. You’re not supposed to talk like that in front of the ‘rents. You know it freaks Mum out.”
Anita blushes and playfully smacks Nicola on the arm, “Oh hush yourself, Nicola Jane, we’re not total old fogies, yet.”
I’m not sure whether to slink away and hide in the corner from the embarrassment of having this conversation with my girlfriend’s parents, who I barely know, or stand proud and own it. Lilah takes the decision out of my hands when she links her fingers through mine and declares, “It’s been a long day. I’m going home with Harry. You want to stay with us, Nic, or are you going home with Mum and Dad?” Then as an afterthought she turns to me and whispers, “It’s still okay to stay with you, right?”
I chuckle and kiss the tip of her nose, playfully replying with, “Well… it looks like it. I can hardly kick you out now, in front of your parents and everything.”
She looks affronted for a split second then reaches up and tweaks my nipple, hard.
“Ouch! What was that for?”
“Because I can.”
“We’re in a cop shop, you know. Maybe I’ll report you for actual bodily harm.”
She smiles at me, her eyes darkening, before licking her plump limps. “Oh, I plan on doing something to your body and some might even class it as harm, but I think you’ll like it.” Then she winks.
“Ewww, we heard that you know.” Nicola protests from the other side of the room, and again I feel like I want to hide in the corner before her father decides to clip me around the ear for leading astray his little girl.
Lilah ignores her and leans towards me, placing a chaste kiss to my lips.
“Take me home please, Harry.”
Home. That word sounds so good coming from her mouth, so good that I have to bite back the urge to strip her down right here, and make her say it over and over again, while naked and riding me like a cowgirl.
Must stop thinking filthy thoughts. Must stop thinking…
“Filthy thoughts? Yeah, it might be a good idea.”
Then the little minx discreetly rubs her hand against my erection and spins around to kiss her folks and Nicola goodbye.
I panic and grab my jacket off the chair, holding it in front of my obvious hard on, so as not to poke Mr and Mrs Tremere in the eye.
She is so gonna pay for that… STOP. I must not think filthy thoughts.
I rock from one foot to the other, going through the times tables in my head, when Nicola comes over and stands straight in front of me. No humour on her face.
“I’d like to take you up on the offer of the spare room, in a few days time, maybe. It’s closer to the hospital for me and…” She begins to ramble, her words all rushing together. I’ve never seen Nic nervous before.
“It’s yours. For how ever long you need it. I’ve already cleared it with Nate.”
Her rambling stops, and she just looks at me. Really looks at me.
“I want to be jealous of you for taking my sister away from me, but I can’t. I can’t be because she’s more herself than she has been for years. You’ve done that Harry. You’re good for her.”
“She’s better for me.”
She thinks for a moment and then smiles, “Huh. You’re her extra.”
“I’m her what?”
“Her extra.”
“I’m not sure what that means.”
“Lilah has always wanted to be ordinary when she’s anything but. She has always said that when she finds her extra, she’ll be extraordinary. You’re it. You’re her extra.”
She leans forward and lowers her voice conspiratorially. “And I can see she’s yours.”
Waves breaking on a shore.
Fireworks exploding in the sky.
A volcano just before it erupts.
Oh, fuck.
Why am I thinking about these things when I’m just about to…
“Oh. My. God. Don’t stop, don’t you dare stop.”
My back arches and I come apart. I feel weightless, yet heavy. Calm, yet buzzing with energy.
“Harry. My name’s Harry. If you’re gonna call out anyone’s name when my head is between your legs, make sure it’s mine.”
I lift my head from the soft pillows just in time to see his devilishly handsome face emerge from between my shaking thighs.
“Get up here, God, and kiss me.”
“With pleasure.” His grin, as he moves up my body, is pure sex. I may just have experienced one of the best orgasms of my life but this look on his face has desire sparking through my body and gathering at the juncture of my thighs.
“I want you inside me, Harry. I want it to be just you and me.”
His mouth takes mine in a deep, delicious kiss and I taste my lust, mixed with a liberal dose of Harry. It’s decadently naughty and I can’t hold back the moan that comes from the centre of my chest.
“It’s always just you and me, Lils.” He pants into my mouth, before taking my bottom lip between his teeth and nipping at it like it’s a sweet treat.
“No, I mean-” I gather my thoughts as his hips roll into mine and his cock drags excruc
iatingly slow over my sensitive clit, “-no condom. I’m clean and I’m on the pill. Let me feel you, just you, nothing else.”
His body stills and his lips no longer trace a path over my collarbone. Does he not trust me after everything he found out about my history with Wayne? Does he think, even for one second, that I’d put him at risk?
“We don’t have to; I just wanted to let you know the option is there if you-”
“I’m infertile; I can’t have kids, Lils. No balls, remember?”
I am such an idiot.
“Harry, I’m…”
His head lifts and his face hovers directly over mine. “Don’t say you’re sorry, Lils. Saying sorry means you pity me. I’ve had enough pity; I don’t deserve it. I’m alive. Here with you I’m alive. Who needs balls for that?”
He tries and fails to give me a carefree smile but I can see his pain. He’s buried it deep and covers it with humour, but it’s there, clear as day.
I search his beautiful grey eyes wondering if he wants to talk or if this is the wrong time. Maybe our second time getting naked with one another isn’t the best time to address it, but I need him to know that nothing has changed for me. “I’d rather have you, minus your original nuts, than never getting a chance to experience what we have right now. We may have both lost a fundamental part of us, but we’ve still got the most important one, our hearts and right now, Harry David Brown, you own mine and I don’t want it back.”
I watch as my words register, his eyes looking over me like it’s the first time. Without speaking he leans down and takes my mouth with his. Just as I’m about to gasp for air, he slides straight into me, right to the hilt, and steals the last bit of oxygen from my lungs.
“I” a delicious roll of his hips, “adore”, a lick from his hot tongue right over my nipple, “you.” He pulls almost the entire way out before thrusting back in and hitting the spot inside me that makes me cry out in ecstasy.
“Harry.” His name is both a plea and a prayer.
“Say it again,” he demands huskily.
Despite being on the edge of orgasm I can’t help but play with him, “God.”
