by Cassy Roop
She lifted up from face down on the couch and scurried to the other side trying to get away from me. The belt had come loose, and she quickly yanked the leather straps from around her wrists. Huge red-rimmed green eyes bored into me as her breath heaved in and out.
“What the hell has gotten into you, Dominic? I...what just happened?” she asked in a shaky voice.
“What’s gotten into me?” I laughed maliciously. “Seems to me something got into you. Me. My cum all over you, in you, sweetheart. Your greedy little pussy had no complaints while I was pounding into you, did it? So, tell me, what is my price for that orgasm I just gave you?” I asked as I pulled my wallet from my back pocket. Reaching in, I pulled out a wad of hundred dollar bills and threw them at her causing them to float through the air before landing scattered around her.
“I hope that is enough for your services.” I bit out angrily as I shoved my cock back into my pants. I reached for my belt and tears streamed down her face as she pulled one of the pillows from the couch in front of her to hide her naked pussy from me. I turned and made my way over to the door with the intent on leaving. Yanking it open, I welcomed the burst of air that swept across my face, cooling my heated flesh.
I turned around to face her once more before I made my exit.
“How does it feel, Ashley? How does it feel to be the one fucked, now?” I said with a sardonic smile before walking out, slamming the door behind me.
I stared at the closed door through the tears that swam in my eyes.
What the fuck just happened?
If it weren’t for the humming of my body after coming down from an intense orgasm, I wouldn’t believe what just occurred. Even though Dominic’s words sliced through me like a sharp blade cutting through the fabric of my soul, I knew he was angry and just taking his frustrations out on me. How could I blame him? I knew he was hurt, and what I did had to completely have ripped him apart.
I fought desperately not to let the tears fall. I felt used and cheap, but the funny thing was, I wanted to feel that way. I wanted to know that even if it meant that I was completely obliterated, Dominic somehow got some sort of satisfaction out of what happened. If it would make him feel better about how I had betrayed him, then I would allow him to use me over and over again. I would welcome this pain, knowing that it cannot be half as bad as how Dominic must be feeling. I deserved this.
Hugging the pillow closer to my chest, I closed my eyes to try and relish in the opportunity of being able to have him inside of me again. Even though it was out of anger and spite, the fact that he couldn’t control himself proved to me that he still had some sort of feelings for me. I could only hope that those feelings were love and not hate. I didn’t think I could bear it if Dominic were to hate me. My only hope was that I could get out from underneath Asher’s blackmail and right all the wrong, anguish and pain I had caused to the ones I love.
I was broken from my pitiful bout of self-destruction by the sound of my phone beeping. It could only be two people left who would text me, seeing as I couldn’t expect one from the man who just walked out my door. My legs trembled as I rose from the couch to retrieve my phone from my purse. The sticky evidence of Dominic’s presence on my body caused friction between my thighs with each step that I took. The memory of his hands as he spread his cum all over me after he erupted inside of me felt like a claim of possession and the thought alone gave me the faintest bit of hope that he still wanted me.
I slid my fingers across the screen of my phone to bring up my waiting text message. My heart sank into the pit of my stomach at the words on the screen.
Asher: What the fuck was Dominic doing at your place??
If I had any doubt that he was watching me before, then the text message gave me proof. I felt nauseous knowing that he and his fucking goons, Drake and Officer Russell, were watching me. Asher alone made me want to punch something hard, but I was even angrier at the thought of Drake and Russell being involved. Drake was supposed to be Dominic and Knox’s friend, but instead, he had chosen money over loyalty, and Russell was a fucking officer of the law for Christ sake.
I angrily punched the screen to type out a reply. I knew if I didn’t the repercussions would not be good.
Me: He showed up out of the blue. What was I supposed to do?
Asher: You better hope you kept your trap shut.
Me: I did, don’t worry.
He didn’t say anything else after my reply, and I was thankful. I threw my phone down on the desk and went to take a shower. Peeling my ripped shorts and panties off of my body and tossed them aside to discard later. After lifting my cami over my head, I turned to face myself in the mirror and that is when I saw the marks on my skin. Angry red spots in the shape of fingerprints were branded onto my hip bones serving as a reminder of Dominic’s visit. I traced each spot in an attempt to feel closer to him just from the touch of the imprint. Tears stung in my eyes and I swiped at them before they could fall.
I have to find a way out of this.
Stepping into the shower, I welcomed the sting of the hot water as it trickled down from the showerhead. At the same time, I was saddened by the fact that I was now washing Dominic’s scent off of me. I wanted to still smell the aroma of him upon my skin; I wanted to still feel like he was close to me, but I couldn’t go to my art class smelling like sex.
As I washed my hair, I also started thinking about how I was going to find employment. With the club being closed down pending the court hearing, I no longer had an income. I doubt that Dominic or Knox would let me back anyways. I had made some great money working at the club in the short time I was there, but I did spend a large chunk of it on my tuition for classes, so I needed to find a way to support myself. With Kelly not really speaking to me, Lord knew how long I would be welcome in her home.
I turned off the taps and stepped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around myself. Padding to my room, I paused when I noticed an envelope on the bed addressed to me. I turned around to peek out of my bedroom door to see if Kelly might have come home, but I didn’t see her. I sat down on the bed and tentatively slid my finger through the hole to open the flap of the envelope. I was stunned when I pulled out a card from Kelly.
The tears that I had wiped away earlier before my shower, were now flowing freely down my face. With me being sick, and all of the shit going on with Dominic and Asher, I had completely forgotten about my birthday. Looking over to the calendar I had hanging on my wall above my nightstand, I confirmed that it was indeed April Twentieth, my twenty-sixth birthday. I let out a sardonic laugh. What a way to spend my fucking birthday, away from those that I love. I was grateful to Kelly for even remembering and for even reaching out to me in the first place even though she was angry. She must have come into the apartment while I was in the shower and left before I got out.
I got dressed in a pair of comfortable jeans and a navy blue racer back tank with white stripes. It looked to be a nice day out and I could always wear a cardigan over the top of my tank if it got too cold. I slipped on a pair of silver gladiator sandals and reached into the top drawer of my dresser to retrieve the necklace that I have carried around with me everywhere I have gone. The submissive training necklace had been a comfort to me, a way of carrying Dominic around with me. I was too ashamed to wear it around my neck, so I always placed it in my pocket for safe-keeping.
I left my room and made my way into the kitchen to make myself one more cup of coffee and to take the medication the doctor had prescribed to help me get over the nasty sinus infection. I was feeling better, but I wanted to make sure I took all of it so that I didn’t risk the chance of it coming back. I pulled a pony-tail holder I had on my wrist off and pulled my hair back into a low, messy bun before securing it with the band. My long hair always seemed to get in the way while I was painting, and I soon learned to keep it pulled back.
I thought about how I was going to see Rownan again today in class. I knew he would have to strip down for us again to complete our
abstracts. Only, the painting I did on Monday was not Rownan but Dominic. It seemed like no matter what I did, I couldn’t get Dominic off of my mind. I was heartbroken and missing him, more than words could say. Everywhere I went, I was reminded of how much I loved him, but also reminded of the damage I had caused him. With Kelly gone, and my betrayal, I was left alone to my thoughts, which was a dangerous place to be.
I sighed as I grabbed my purse and my phone to leave for my art class. With my heart and mind heavy, I forced myself to go on vowing to try to find a way out of this predicament I was in.
Ugh.
Happy birthday to me.
How the fuck could I have gone off the deep end like that? Knox was going to fucking kill me when he found out what I had done. It was like someone had taken possession over my mind and body, and I was only existing in the moment.
Damn, I couldn’t describe how wonderful it felt to be inside of Ashley again, but I was also tormented by it. It was a curse, both heaven and hell. It was a reminder how things were, and of how things could have been. I felt like a slave to my emotions every time I was around her. Her touches, her scent, her skin—all like shots of heroin to my system and she was the only person who could provide my fix.
I walked over to the window of my apartment and rested my forehead upon the cool glass to stare out at the Chicago skyline. I went over to Ashley’s house in search of answers, and I left with only more questions than I had before. How the fuck this one woman could get to me when no one else had or could ever, I don’t know.
I was startled when I heard the front door of the apartment open and in walked Knox, Victoria, and Toby. They were chatting and didn’t notice me standing at the window in a moment of desperation to try to clear my head.
“Nic, Toby, and Vic are here so that we can start going over stuff for our defense,” Knox yelled into the room. I pushed away from the window and walked over to where my friends had gathered around the coffee table with bags of Chinese food. After pulling out enough food to feed an army, we all filled our plates and dug in.
“So, Toby, what is the game plan?” Knox asked as he chewed on his lo mein noodles. I grabbed one of the beers from the table and twisted off the top, downing the cool, flavor of hops and barley until nothing was left in the bottle but a tiny bit of foam.
“Damn, Nic, you alright?” Victoria asked as I reached for another bottle, bypassing the food on my plate in favor of the liquid memory eraser.
“Yeah, Vic, I’m perfectly fine, I just had my future and heart ripped out of my fucking chest by a woman, no big deal,” I snapped. She visibly flinched at my words, and as soon as I said them, I felt bad for my verbal outburst. It wasn’t her fault that I was in a fucking pissy mood or the fact that the one woman I fell in love with had destroyed me.
“Damn, Nic, don’t take it out on her,” Toby said in chastisement. I scooted over to Victoria and wrapped my arm around her shoulder.
“I’m sorry, Vic, I didn’t mean to take it out on you,” I said as I squeezed her against my side. I have always felt comfortable around Victoria; we became great friends over the years. We hired her on at the club in Reno, and that is where she transformed from the sweet Victoria, to Madam V. Being Dominant helped her get over the years of abuse from her ex, and now she was a natural and very well sought after by men and women at the club.
I polished off my second beer in a matter of minutes, and thought it wise to get some food in me. I took a heaping bite of rice and turned to Toby.
“So where do we go from here?” I said while I tried to chew my rice. Toby sat his plate down and reached for a napkin to wipe sweet and sour sauce that had dribbled down his chin.
“First things first, we need to have a meeting with all the staff. Decide who would be willing to testify on your behalf. Maybe we can interview some of the members as well and see if any are willing to help.”
He paused as he took a swig of his beer before setting it back down onto the coffee table. Knox and Victoria were taking in his suggestions along with me.
“Knox, you should get with your security guys, look through footage and see if there is anything we can find on camera that might be damaging. I don’t care what it is. The prosecution will use anything and everything they can to make you look guilty.” Toby looked out the window and opened his mouth to speak, but then closed it again as if he were struggling to say his next words.
“What, Toby?” I asked him impatiently. Knox and Victoria had stopped eating and focused all of their attention on him.
“I think, I think one of us needs to talk to Ashley.”
My face went stark white and the fork I was holding fell to clank against the hardwood floor, breaking the silence that had strewn between us. I watched in slow motion as all three of their heads turned to look at me and Knox’s eyes narrowed at me suspiciously.
“Dominic, I can talk to her if you want,” Toby suggested.
“You didn’t…” Knox chimed in, “Tell me you fucking didn’t. Dammit, Nic! I knew I shouldn’t have left you today.”
I placed my elbows on my knees and fisted my hair in my hands as I hung my chin towards my chest. Victoria placed her hand on my knee, trying to grab my attention.
“Nic, tell us what happened,” she said in a reassuring voice. Knox stood up so fast he nearly knocked over the food on the table. Memories of how I had fucked Ashley only hours before flooded my thoughts—the feel of her skin beneath me as I pressed her up against the door. My dick twitched in my pants just from the thought of it. She was the only person that could heal the broken parts of me, only she could heal what no medicine could fix. I have been completely taken by her the moment she walked into my club, she was both a relief and a curse.
“Dammit, Nic, you went over there didn’t you?” he asked as he paced back and forth in front of all of us. Toby and Victoria’s heads both snapped in my direction.
“Is that true, Nic? Did you go see her? What did you say to her? You should have known better. Anything you said to her could be used against us,” Toby said. I looked at him and then to Victoria who had a weird expression on her face. I couldn’t tell if it was anger or what.
“I did, not much was said,” I admitted. I rose from the chair, walked over to the pool table, and started to rack the balls. I needed something to keep my hands busy or I was going to fucking lose it.
“You’ve probably scared the shit out of her. I still have this feeling that she didn’t do it on purpose. Talking to Kelly, she said that this is completely out of character for her. She has always been trustworthy and someone who is loyal to those she loves.”
“So says her best friend, Knox. If she didn’t do it on purpose, then why did she do it? Not only did she hurt Nic, but also she put us all out of a job. Are you forgetting that it is your ass on the line too, or are you too pussy whipped by her friend to see who she really is?”
“That is crossing the line, Vic,” Knox snapped. Being a man who shaved his head, you could see the blood vessels on his crown as they forcefully pumped the blood through his veins. I watched him trying to keep his emotions under control after Victoria’s insinuation. For the moment, the spotlight was taken off of me and my indiscretion this afternoon.
“Alright, look guys. We need to keep level headed about this. Fighting with each other will not do you any good. We need to stay together in this if we want to get past it all,” Toby said interrupting us.
I leaned over the pool table, lining up the cue ball as I stroked the smooth wood of my pool stick. I gave it a few priming swipes between my fingers before pulling back and ramming it into the white ball, sending it barreling down and colliding with the triangle stack of balls at the end of the table. I couldn’t help but watch as it hit the stack, sending each ball flying off in opposite directions and how much it reflected my life at the moment. One ball—one object that sent the others off into motion upon impact. Ashley was the white ball, and each colored ball was a piece of me, that was now left scattered upon a
landscape of green felt.
Knox approached and put his hand on my arm.
“Nic, what happened?” he said in a low voice that Toby and Victoria couldn’t hear. I turned to the living room to find them clearing the mess of food containers off of the table. I couldn’t look Knox in the eye, so I busied myself lining up my next shot.
“I went to get answers, Knox. I’m going fucking crazy. I can’t stop thinking about her—I can’t get her off my fucking mind. I can’t stop hating her, but worst of all I can’t stop loving her,” I admitted as I shot the cue into the three ball letting it fall into the corner pocket.
“What did she say?” he asked me curiously. This was not going to go over well.
“Not much. I really didn’t give her much of an opportunity. I-I kind of lost control and then went off on her before we…” I trailed off not wanting to admit what I had done. I lined up the ball once again to take my next shot. Knox’s hand came down on the stick stopping me from completing my task.
“Before you what, Nic?”
“Before I fucked her.” I admitted as I leaned my forehead down on the smooth velvet of the pool table.
“Jesus fucking Christ, Dominic!” Knox roared. I threw the pool stick down on the table as Toby and Victoria both looked in our direction.
“What is going on?” Toby asked.
“Oh, nothing. Our boy here may have just sealed our fate by going to visit Ashley today and fucking her!”
Toby just sighed and Victoria looked half disgusted. I stood there with my hands on my hips as I remained under scrutiny from my friends.
“Ugh, enough of this crap. I think we need a break. What do you guys say we go out tonight?” Victoria asked us all.
We all looked at each other, and I nodded in agreement. I wanted to get Ashley off of my mind even if I had to go out and get shit faced drunk to do so.
