“I have some good news, but it may upset you,” Susan began.
Katherine looked at Susan askance. “Why would it upset me?”
“It’s about John… the Duke, and I. There’s no easy way to say this except to say we’re engaged.”
It was clear Katherine did not expect that, and she put her hand to her mouth.
“I know. It’s a shock. But John and I have been getting to know one another for many months now. Working together, sharing the care of Elizabeth together. Our affections just grew. And then Daniel was away and we had so little communication until he returned so expectantly.”
“Do you think this still would have happened if Daniel hadn’t had his troubles?”
“Yes, Katherine, I believe it would have. I cared a great deal for Daniel, but while I admired him and was deeply grateful for his attentions toward me, I have to honestly say it was not a passionate romance.”
Katherine was silent and gazed into her lap. “But I thought…”
Susan took Katherine’s hand again. “John and I… we’ve become so closely knitted together. And Elizabeth has become such a deep part of my life. I cannot imagine not being with her and caring for her.”
“And the Duke? Do you care for him as deeply?”
“Yes. I do. When he touches me I shiver from head to toe. He makes my vision go wobbly and I feel like I’m melting. And as much as I cared for Daniel—and I did—I never felt that way when he touched me. I feel I would have eventually made the same decision even if Daniel hadn’t become ill.”
Katherine fingered her apron for a moment before speaking. “Perhaps you’re right.”
“And what about your marriage? Have you and Roger set a date?
Katherine gave her first smile. “Yes. It’s going to be in May of next year. And I want you to be my bridesmaid. Will you?”
“I will if you’ll be mine,” Susan said.
Katherine and Susan both nodded together. Then they threw their arms around each other and began to cry.
Chapter 29
Elizabeth was asleep on Susan’s lap as they headed back toward Haverford. John was holding Susan’s hand and even he was fighting nodding off.
Mamma had persuaded them to say for dinner and had managed to send word to Jacob and Louisa to bring their families to meet the newly engaged couple.
Now, as the carriage rocked, all three were tired.
“How did it go with Katherine?” John asked when he had briefly shaken off his tiredness.
“Well enough. I left it for her to tell her parents about our engagement. And we both agreed to be each other’s bridesmaids. So it was not a disaster.”
“Christmas is coming rapidly upon us. I’d like to announce our engagement Christmas day. Would that be fine with you?” John asked.
Susan nodded. “Seems like a good time to do it. But won’t we need to set a wedding day before we announce?”
John nodded. “If you like. And what are your thoughts about that?”
“It would be nice to hold the wedding outdoors in warm weather. April—May? How does that sound?”
John smiled. “I’m not sure I want to wait that long.”
“Oh… Then what are you thinking?” she asked.
“Sometime before the sheering starts up in March.”
“Not in the church where Simon and I were to be married, please. That would not be comfortable—for any of us.”
“I was thinking of the Haverford chapel.”
“Oh, that’s a sweet place. Perfect. Then you set the date to your liking. But let me know because I want to invite my cousin Jessica and her husband and they are so booked ahead they’ll need to know early.”
“And I was thinking of inviting Annabel’s parents too. It’s been a long time since they’ve seen their granddaughter.”
“Very good idea,” Susan answered.
“Oh, and speaking about engagements, Simon told me he’d found our Christmas tree and announced right afterward that he’d asked Fitz to marry him.”
“Gracious… were you expecting that?”
John laughed. “Simon mentioned the possibility to me a few days before.”
“And how do you feel about that?” she asked.
“Ambiguous, at best. But it’s his life.”
“But does that mean they’ll be living at Haverford with us in perpetuity?” Susan almost giggled.
“I’ve given that some thought.”
“And?”
“I thought they might be able to reside at the school when it’s completed, but if it becomes a boarding school, I don’t think it would be very comfortable living with dozens of students running about.”
“Oh, no.”
“So I think it’s best to wait and see if their wedding actually happens, and if it does, we’ll evaluate the situation then.”
“Have they set a date for their wedding?” Susan asked.
“Not that I know of,” John answered.
“Do you think they may want to have a joint wedding with us?” Susan asked, a little apprehensively.
John grimaced. “It would probably be the expedient thing to do but I’d rather not. He may be my brother, but as a Duke, there is a number of people in the establishment I’ll be expected to invite that wouldn’t be happy attending a second brother’s wedding at the same time.”
“It also detracts from the specialness of each individual wedding. And I feel certain Miss Fitzwilliam would agree.”
They rode on in silence, until John said, “Aunt Clarissa gave me a letter the other day that Annabel wrote me before she gave birth to Elizabeth.”
“I don’t understand…”
“I’ll let you read it. It explains.”
“You want me to read it? Why?”
“I don’t want anything unspoken between us. And one day I’ll want to let Elizabeth see it too. It’s part of who she is and it is part of our history.”
Susan nodded.
* * *
The Christmas tree was being set up in the largest sitting room. Aunt Clarissa was directing the staff in the decorations. There were numerous ornaments standing by in boxes for the tree, and the air was scented by the pine boughs being woven into garlands for decorating the fireplaces and the windows.
“It’s going to be lovely,” Susan said to Clarissa.
“It’s been too long since we’ve had a Christmas like this,” she said, “For years after Annabel’s death, Christmas was only modestly celebrated. But now, you are here breathing new life into the house. And I know Elizabeth will love the celebration.”
“Do you have a head count yet for Christmas dinner?” Susan asked.
“More than we at first anticipated,” Clarissa said. “John has invited Elizabeth’s maternal grandparents, and now your parents are coming as well. Did you invite Katherine?”
“I did but she’ll spend Christmas this year with her family. She felt since this is the first Christmas after Daniel’s been institutionalized…”
“Of course.”
“And we have Simon and Miss Fitzwilliam…”
Susan leaned in and said softly. “I think you can call her Fitz now.”
Clarissa looked at Susan askance. “I’ve still not fully assimilated the idea of Miss Fitzwilliam as a niece-in-law—if there even is such a term.”
“I think she would be just the wife of your nephew. I’m afraid you must soon call her either Mrs. Chamberlain or Fiona.”
“We shall see.” Clarissa went over to a staff member and directed to start trimming the tree once it was securely positioned.
She came back to Susan. “It’s too bad there won’t be any other children amongst the guests. It’s sad that Elizabeth will be the only child.”
That gave Susan an idea. “How do you think John would react to having some of the villagers with children to the dinner?”
“Hmm,” Clarissa said. “I’m not certain about that. I think both our guests and the villagers would feel uncomfortable toget
her at table.”
“Then what about a separate event? We could have our scheduled noon dinner with family and then, in the evening, have the villagers—who are, after all, John’s workers—come for a separate celebration with their children?”
Clarissa considered that. “I think that’s a splendid idea, but it shouldn’t be too late if there are children—too many sleepy-heads after a busy Christmas day.”
“I’ll talk to John about it,” Susan offered.
“Don’t miss the back of the tree,” Clarissa spoke out to several staff members.
Just then the sitting room door opened and Fitz came in. She was dressed simply and was wearing considerably less makeup that was usual for her.
“You wished to see me?” she asked as she came up to Susan.
“Oh, yes. Are you free to chat?” Susan asked.
“Of course. Your wish is my command,” she answered.
Susan was unsure how to take that comment. Was she being sarcastic? But she chose not to read anything into it.
“Let’s find a quieter place to talk.”
Susan led Fitz to an adjoining sitting room and they sat by the fire.
Susan watched Fitz carefully. This was going to be a defining moment in their relationship. If the old, catty Fitz was still evident she didn’t see how she could accept Fitz as a teacher for the school, no matter how much Simon might desire it.
“First, I haven’t had the opportunity to congratulate you on your engagement,” Susan said.
Fitz smiled simply. “Thank you, Susan, that means a lot to me—especially coming from Simon’s ex-fiancé.”
“We are to be family now.”
Fitz lowered her eyes, and said, “I want to apologize to you.”
“For what?”
“I saw you at first as a rival. There was a time when I hoped that His Grace and I might develop a romantic attachment. But he let it be known that was not to be.”
“So you went after Simon,” Susan said a little unkindly.
“I know it must seem like that. But that is not the case. I was hesitant to pursue him, even though I found him to be most sympathetic.”
“Oh, Fitz, I saw you flirting openly with him as soon as he recovered from his illness.”
She nodded. “Yes, I admit to that, but only because he so clearly encouraged it.”
“And you are sincere in your affections to him?” Susan asked.
Fitz sighed and teared up. “My dear Susan, I know it must be difficult for you to believe me. I’ve not treated you well. But dear Simon has touched me in a way no other man ever has. He sees me as I really am. Not the brass and brazen society hanger-on that you’ve seen, but the frightened little girl holding on to any shred of security she might latch on to.
“Susan, I have no family. And I’ve had to fight my way up the social ladder, trading upon tenuous connections and begging favors just to survive—with the hope of one day finding a home. And Simon has finally offered me that home. Please don’t judge me too harshly.”
That gave Susan a great deal to think about. How quickly one could rush to judgment she realized. She could see she was fully capable of just such judgment herself.
“Thank you for telling me that. It can’t have been easy for you,” Susan said. “From now on I’ll endeavor to see you for who you are as well. Forgive me if I’ve been judgmental.”
“And forgive me for treating you unkindly when we first met,” Fitz said.
Susan felt it was time to get down to the business at hand. “Well then, Simon tells me you wish to teach at our school. Is that so?”
“Yes, I long to be an accepted and valuable part of this family. I wish to help in any way I can. And it seems like the school would be the best way for me to do that.”
“But do you have any experience with teaching—or dealing with children?”
Fitz shook her head. “I don’t. I know that might preclude me from participating, but if there’s any way you could see to include me in your project I’d be most grateful.”
“I’ll need to think about it. But why teaching? Simon is to be Headmaster and, as his wife, you’ll be intimately involved with his work at the school. Wouldn’t that be enough?”
“I do want to support him in all of his endeavors, but I also want my own responsibilities. Simon tells me you’re to introduce new methods of teaching. Might I not train under you and apply your principles as you direct?”
“Perhaps. We’re still many months away from opening the school. Work with me closely in the meantime and we’ll see how well you like what we’re doing. If by the time we open the school you still want to be involved, I’ll consider it.”
“Excellent,” Fitz said, beaming. “Oh, and Susan, if you don’t mind. I’d like to be called Fiona from now on. Fitz belongs to a person from that past that I no longer recognize.”
Susan laughed. “Gladly.”
* * *
Elizabeth was seated on Susan’s lap in the window seat. She was leaning back against Susan as she read aloud to her. Susan would occasionally point to a word and ask Elizabeth if she knew it. Mostly she did.
The story was about mother and baby goats. Elizabeth looked up at Susan and asked, “After you marry Father, can I call you mommy?”
Susan looked down at her. “Is that what you want?”
Elizabeth nodded emphatically. “Father has been so sad for so long. I’m really glad to see him happy again.”
“Yes, he seems to be. But I know he’s also happy because you’ve been learning so quickly. He wants you to be happy and healthy and smart and beautiful, and forever his darling daughter.”
“That’s because you’re such a good teacher.”
“Thank you, for saying that, my dear.”
“Will I be able to go to the new school when it opens next year?”
“Maybe. Your father and I will need to discuss that.”
“I want to be with other children. It gets lonely only seeing Sara and Patrick once a week.”
Susan nodded. “I’ve yet to speak to your father, but I’ve been thinking about inviting the workers from the village and their children to come here Christmas day for a party in the afternoon. What do you think about that?”
“Oh, yes. That’d be lovely. Will there be games?”
“Absolutely.”
She then gave her a kiss on top of her head. “Now then, let’s see what other trouble those baby goats are going to get themselves into.”
* * *
Susan and Clarissa were enjoying their afternoon tea when Clarissa looked up from her darning and said, “Susan, there’s something else we need to discuss.”
“Of course.”
“You have a wedding coming up. Have you thought about a gown?”
That surprised Susan for she’d not given any consideration to that yet. “Oh, I still have my wedding dress from when I was engaged to Simon.”
Clarissa tsked. “Susan this is to be a wedding for a duchess. I think we’ll need something befitting your new station, don’t you?”
“I keep forgetting I’m to be a duchess.”
“Yes, and we need to address that.”
“How exactly do you mean?”
“I know this might sound absurd, but you need to have some lessons in becoming a duchess.”
Susan laughed. “Is there a school for such occasions?”
Clarissa smiled. “Most young ladies who become duchesses are born and bred into the tradition. They do not need tutoring. However, you, my dear, are going to need to learn the manners, forms, and traditions that go with the title. And I have set myself the task of helping you learn what you need to know.”
“Then you shall have a very willing and able pupil. Even a teacher must learn from time to time.”
“Excellent. Then at the first opportunity, you and I shall go to my dressmaker and we will begin the process of constructing your gown.”
Chapter 30
It was Christmas morning, and Susan
couldn’t believe she was up before Elizabeth who was still asleep. In her family, the children were always awake before the parents and were to be found sitting in front of the Christmas tree admiring what Father Christmas had brought them during the night.
Diaries of a Heartbroken Duchess: A Historical Regency Romance Collection Page 29
