* Skip the perfume when you’re outdoors.
Insects are attracted to strong odors. If you know you’ll be spending a lot of time outside, avoid using perfume, cologne, or even really smelly soaps.
* Avoid tiptoeing through the clover barefoot.
How much would it stink—and hurt!—to get stung between your toes? A lot. But a bee can’t tickle your tootsies if you’re wearing shoes. So for feet’s sake, put on your footgear.
* Avoid dusk and dawn.
Mosquitoes are most active at these times of day. And avoiding dawn is yet another good excuse to sleep in!
* Don’t wear brightly colored clothing.
Many insects respond to bright, wild colors and patterns (they think you’re a flower), so put that vivid yellow shirt away for the day.
The SWAT Team
The best way to swat a fly or a mosquito is to use two hands. Although those little buggers might see one hand coming at them, their brains are too tiny to figure out what to do once a second hand appears. When you see a fly, slowly move your hands around both sides of its body. It will be so bewildered that you should be able to swat it simply by clapping your hands.
* Stay calm. Repeat: Stay calm.
If a bee lands on you, it will almost always leave on its own. It’s just like a dog that wants to sniff you. If you start flapping your arms or shrieking, you risk making it defensive, which is when it’s most likely to sting. If you can’t wait for the bee to leave on its own, gently and slowly brush it away with a piece of paper.
IF STUNG. . .
Try to put mind over matter and convince yourself that you’re not really crazy itchy. But if that doesn’t work, give these suggestions a whirl.
BE AWARE • If you start hyperventilating or having a hard time breathing, or if the stung area starts swelling like crazy, find an adult—or have a friend find one—immediately. You could be having a dangerous allergic reaction.
* Ice it.
Numb the bite with an ice pack or ice wrapped in a towel.
* Paste it.
Combine baking soda and just enough water to make a sticky paste and dab it onto your bite. Or, you can squeeze a little toothpaste onto the itchy area. Both pastes help dry out and shrink the bite.
* Soap it.
Sometimes rubbing the itch with a bar of soap helps soothe the spot.
* Whatever you do, don’t scratch it.
You’ll wind up making the itch worse, not better. If you must scratch, use your knuckles, since germs under your nails could cause an infection.
Unsavory Plants to Avoid
Insects aren’t the only stingers in the wilderness. If you encounter either of these ghastly green growths, steer clear!
If you do happen to touch one of these plants, act fast! Get an adult’s help to clean your skin with rubbing alcohol or special soap designed to remove the itch-causing plant oils. Use plenty and rinse with lots of cool water—this is no time for moderation!
How to Handle a Bicycle Misadventure
Wearing a helmet, using reflectors, and riding with care are the best ways to stay safe on your bike. But if you and your ride hit a rough patch, here’s what to do.
SLIPPED CHAIN
You shift gears and suddenly the pedals lock up or you have zero resistance. What’s up? Your chain has jumped the rails.
1 Turn your bike upside down.
To stabilize your bike, turn it upside down so it’s standing on its seat and handlebars.
2 Catch the teeth.
Using your fingers or a stick, lift the chain and place it onto the teeth in the rear chain ring, and then onto the teeth in the front chain ring. The chain won’t fit all the way around—it’ll just hang loosely from the front ring.
3 Rotate and roll.
Keeping your fingers out of reach of the chain, grab the nearest pedal and rotate it very slowly in the normal pedaling direction. The chain should thread its way back on.
When You Need a Bike Doctor
Things went seriously wrong, and you (and your bike) went down. After you’ve picked yourself up and brushed off the dirt (you were wearing your helmet, right?), assess your bike. If you have any of the following issues, it’s best to leave repairs to the pros:
• Bent frame or front fork
• Flat tire
• Broken chain
• Snapped brake cable
SLIPPERY ROADS
Slick roads are a bicyclist’s nightmare. The best solution is to avoid riding in the rain at all. But if your sunny day ends in puddles and spray, here’s what to do.
1 Survey the territory.
It takes a lot longer to stop when it’s wet. Plus, roads are more slippery after a little rain, because the water mixes with surface oils. Be on the lookout for super-slick manhole covers, oily patches (look for rainbows), and fallen leaves.
2 Give it a brake.
Wet brakes take much longer to stop a bike, so test your brakes before you need to use them. Take it slow, and don’t wait until you’re flying out of control to start braking.
BE AWARE • On wet roads, back-pedal gently or apply light pressure to your brakes—braking suddenly could cause you to skid.
3 Keep your turns wide.
A tight turn (or a swerve) on a slippery road ups your chances of spinning out. If you start to skid, reduce pressure on the brakes a little.
4 Lighten up.
Falling rain or spray from cars can make visibility poor for drivers. In these conditions, it’s really important to wear bright clothing and have reflectors on your bike.
5 Walk it off.
If you’re facing a steep downhill or pouring rain, remember that there’s no shame in walking your bike!
How to Survive Getting Lost in the Woods
Your family thought it would be a great idea to “get back to nature” and take a hike in the woods. Unfortunately, some of them have such a bad sense of direction they’d have trouble finding their way out of a paper bag! If those in charge have led you astray (a.k.a. gotten you lost), stay calm and suggest the following ideas.
1 Stop and re-step.
Once you realize you’ve wandered off the trail, go no farther. Retrace your footsteps to get back to the trail. Do not be tempted to take a shortcut—this can get you even more lost. Look for blazes (splotches of paint on trees) or cairns (rock piles)—these signs indicate the direction of the trail.
2 Don’t panic.
Even if you’re afraid you’re really, really lost, a cool head will help you find your way home faster than a frantic one.
Prepare, Prepare, Prepare
The best way to avoid getting lost in the first place is to do some careful planning before you head into the woods. Make sure the adults you’re hiking with have told someone at home where you are heading and are equipped with the following essentials.
• Map, plus guidebook or trail description
• Extra clothing: extra warm layers and a waterproof layer
• Extra water: at least 2–3 quarts (2–3 L) per person per day
• Water filter or treatment pellets
• Reliable fire starter (like waterproof matches)
• Food for the day (plus extra for an emergency)
• Whistle
• Sunscreen
• Insect repellent
• First-aid kit
This may sound like a lot of gear for a short day hike, and you will probably never need some of it. But if you do need it, you’ll be very glad you have it! Make sure you are equipped with essentials, including but not limited to: a map, extra layers (warm and waterproof), and extra water.
3 Stick together.
You may be mad that your folks got you lost, but you don’t want to make the situation worse by losing them, too. Stick close to your fellow hikers. The more of you there are, the better chance you’ll have of attracting help.
4 Thar she blows!
Make signals to help people locate you. Give your whistle three lon
g toots, then wait and toot three times again in another direction. (If you forgot your whistle, just shout, “Help!”) If someone calls back to you, wait for them to come to you and lead you back to the trail.
5 Hug a tree.
If help doesn’t come right away, it’s important to stay put. Wandering around off the trail could get you even more lost, or worse, injured. Find a warm, safe, visible spot and stay there.
6 Bundle up and take care of yourselves.
The key things you need to survive are water, warmth, and food. It’s a lot harder to warm yourself once you’ve gotten cold, so put on your extra layers to retain your body heat. You wisely prepared your backpacks with emergency supplies before you left home (didn’t you?), so now’s the time to use them. Drink to stay hydrated, and eat your trail mix to stay nourished. And since you told people where you were headed and when you’d be back (right?), help should eventually come.
7 Graciously accept thanks.
Your companions will be very glad you made sure they were prepared. No need to say, “I told you so” (at least until you get safely home).
Appendix
USEFUL SCHOOLYARD COMEBACKS
The best tool to carry into the schoolyard is a sharp mind. The best comebacks make a person scratch his head as he tries to think of something smart to say back to you.
• “I never forget a face. But in your case I’ll make an exception.”
• “You can say whatever you want to me and I won’t get mad—it’s Be Kind to Animals Week.”
• “I’m not upset by what you said. I know you did it without thinking . . . just like you do everything else.”
• “If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.”
• “I don’t know what your problem is, but I bet it’s hard to pronounce.”
• “You may be trying to insult me, but I know you like me. I can see your tail wagging.”
• “I really want to help you out. Which way did you come in?”
HANDY EXCUSES FOR NOT HANDING IN YOUR HOMEWORK
Here’s our best advice: Do your homework. Here’s our best advice if you didn’t follow that advice: Use one of these lines.
• “I didn’t do it because I didn’t want to add to your workload.”
• “I thought you said it was due tomorrow, and since today is today, I’ll bring it tomorrow.”
• “You’ll be happy to know I told myself, “Self, do your homework!’ Unfortunately, actions speak louder than words.”
• “I did my homework, but aliens took it to study how the human brain works.”
• “It’s true, I didn’t do my homework. But since I want to impress you, I’ll do it right away.”
• “The truth is, I was too tired to do my homework last night. But a good night’s sleep fixed all that.”
• “My head told me to do it, but my hand had the final say.”
• “I’m sorry I don’t have my homework. My underpants were too tight, and they cut off the circulation to my brain.”
CONTRACT WITH NOSY BROTHER OR SISTER RE: “STAYING OUT OF MY STUFF”
To Whom It May Concern:
I, brother/sister of , do hereby state that I understand that I am hereby banned from snooping in ’s room. Furthermore, I will (a) keep my paws to myself, (b) not put my nose where it does not belong, and (c) prevent my eyeballs from “accidentally” looking at his/her personal, private, and confidential stuff.
If I am caught breaking any of these rules, I will voluntarily hand over my favorite toy, . My brother/sister will get to keep this toy for at least one day while I think about my crime of snooping and why it was oh-so-wrong.
Signed,
_______________________________
(Signature of sibling. If sibling is too young to
sign name, marking an “X” is acceptable.)
______________________
(Date)
Witnessed by:
_______________________________
(Signature of witness)
______________________
(Date)
CONTRACT WITH KID BROTHER OR SISTER RE: “HANG TIME”
To Whom It May Concern:
I, little brother/sister of , do hereby state that I understand the “One Time Only” rule of hanging out with . To be clear, the “One Time Only” rule means that just because an adult has encouraged my fantastic older brother/sister to spend time with me today, I totally get that it doesn’t mean he/she will be doing so tomorrow.
Furthermore, I agree to try my hardest to be as little a pest as possible when we’re hanging out. This means I will do my best not to annoy, embarrass, humiliate, anger, poke, prod, or sneeze on or near my dear sibling. I will honor his/her requests not to lag behind. I will bring him/her snacks when asked. I will keep quiet when asked. And I will never tell anyone his/her embarrassing middle name.
Signed,
_______________________________
(Signature of sibling. If sibling is too young to
sign name, marking an “X” is acceptable.)
______________________
(Date)
Witnessed by:
_______________________________
(Signature of witness)
______________________
(Date)
About the Authors
David Borgenicht is a writer, editor, publisher, and the coauthor of all the books in the Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook series. He has survived dozens of childhood nightmares, including the one where you wake up naked in the middle of a test you haven’t studied for. He now lives a stable adult life in Philadelphia.
As a child, Robin Epstein never met a worst-case scenario she didn’t take on headfirst (and she has the scar on her forehead to prove it). She credits her parents for nurturing her free spirit and paying her medical bills, and she thanks them for always encouraging her to think critically and use her noggin. She lives in New York City, where her noggin comes in handy every day.
About the Illustrator
Chuck Gonzales is a New York City–based illustrator who was raised in South Dakota. His work often blends his suburban upbringing and his present urban existence. His client base has been just as diverse, including the New York Times, the Washington Post, Disney, Nickelodeon, Nick Jr., and Chronicle Books. Growing up in the Dakotas as a short, artsy, neurotic kid, he was not spared any junior high indignities.
A WORD OF WARNING: It’s always important to keep safety in mind. If you’re careless, even the tamest activities can result in injury. As such, all readers are urged to act with caution, ask for adult advice, obey all laws, and respect the rights of others when handling any Worst-Case Scenario.
Copyright © 2007 by Quirk Productions, Inc.
A QUIRK PACKAGING BOOK.
All rights reserved.
Worst-Case Scenario and The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook are trademarks of Quirk Productions, Inc.
iPod, Cheerios, and Jell-O are registered trademarks of Apple Computer, Inc., General Mills, Inc., and Kraft Food Holdings, Inc., respectively.
Illustrations by Chuck Gonzales.
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Borgenicht, David.
The worst-case scenario survival handbook : junior edition / by David Borgenicht and Robin Epstein ; illustrations by Chuck Gonzales.
p. cm. — (A Quirk packaging book)
eISBN: 978-0-8118-7294-2
Bundle eISBN: 978-1-4521-0269-6
1. Social skills in children—Juvenile literature. 2. Socialization—Juvenile literature.
3. Children—Humor—Juvenile literature. I. Epstein, Robin, 1972– II. Gonzales, Chuck.
III. Title. IV. Series.
HQ783.B663 2007
646.700835—dc22
2007012511
Chronicle Books LLC
680 Second Street, San Francisco, California 94107
www.chroniclekids.com
The publisher, packager,
and authors disclaim any liability from any injury that may result from the use, proper or improper, of the information contained in this book.
The
WORST-CASE SCENARIO
Survival Handbook:
EXTREME
Junior Edition
By David Borgenicht and Justin Heimberg
Illustrated by Chuck Gonzales
CONTENTS
Welcome to Team Extreme
CHAPTER 1 How to Survive at Sea
How to Fend Off a Shark
How to Build a Raft After a Shipwreck
How to Survive When You’re Adrift at Sea
How to Avoid a Tsunami
How to Treat a Jellyfish Sting
How to Navigate by the Stars
CHAPTER 2 How to Survive in the Mountains
How to Survive an Erupting Volcano
How to Survive an Avalanche
How to Avoid a Bear Attack
How to Survive a Lightning Storm on a Mountainside
How to Escape from a Mountain Lion
How to Go to the Bathroom in the Woods
CHAPTER 3 How to Survive in the Desert
How to Get Along with Tarantulas
How to Deal with a Scorpion
How to Protect Yourself in a Sandstorm
How to Survive an Encounter with a Rattlesnake
How to Find Water in the Desert
How to Stop a Runaway Camel
CHAPTER 4 How to Survive in the Jungle
Junior Edition Bundle Page 5
