Bro,
All I can say is fuck, to begin with. My soul breaks knowing what you’re going through right now. Know this and find some peace. I chose this life to make an impact, to honor family, God and country. Not for the man who sired me and raised you. I never agreed with how he treated you for Mom’s mistake and tried my hardest to protect you and make sure you knew you had a role model to show you the way, until you found your own. And you blazed your own trail, aspired to greatness that I am more proud of than you realize. At times I wanted to be there to share in your success, instead of reading on the web or watching your band accept awards and hit the number one billboard spot for rock. At times I felt the need to drag you back home and kick your ass when things soured and you disappeared into a bottomless bottle.
Too many missions and years away put a wedge between us. Forgive me, brother. Forgive me for Sam. Not loving her wasn’t an option. Watching her struggle after the passing of her parents killed me. I watched the light drain from her eyes and saw the shell of a young woman she became. Helping her through her grief saved a part of me. She became the sunshine in a world of hell, when I was at my lowest, taking night terrors away and caring for me. Would I have married her? Hell yeah, without a doubt.
What you don’t know, is Sam planned on breaking off our engagement. I don’t think she knows, I knew, but I did. I’d rather her not know that I knew, but won’t ask you to lie to her if it comes down to it. My reasons are for her protection. I don’t want her thinking I went into this mission with a hazy mind that resulted in my death. I want her to be happy. I want you to be happy.
Carpe Diem, bro.
Take charge. Go after our girl. Cherish her. Make beautiful babies with her. Give your son my name, it’d be the greatest honor you could bestow on me, knowing my name lives on through our line. Don’t waste a second of the blessing of another day, in the arms of your soul mate. All the success and accomplishment mean nothing with no one to share it with.
Thank you for saving our mother from that emotionally sadistic husband and giving her something I wasn’t able to. A new start free of his manipulation and secure premises for her to build herself back up again. She is a bitter woman who doesn’t deserve your help or support. That alone speaks even more of your character. That you are able to swallow that and be the better man gives me hope that you can move on past the hate I know consumes you. Forgiving her doesn’t mean forgetting. Forgiving is for you not her. I love you, brother, through it all, your success and failures, because of who you were and who you’ve become. You save more lives than you know with your strength and inspiration through your music. You are the best brother a man could ever want or have. I’m watching over you, always.
Remember my last words. Carpe Diem, bro. I can’t say those two words enough. Life is short. Grab it by the balls, live hard, love deep. My gift to you is my medal of honor, because the honor is all mine in having you as my baby bro.
Jimmy forced himself to fold the paper, slip it back in the envelope and take out the present his brother gave him. He fingered the gold five-pointed star surrounded with Valor inscribed and Minerva’s head surrounded by the words United States of America. Each ray of the star a green oak leaf, with bar engraved The Congress to Sgt. First Class Miles O’Riley. Running his fingers over each inch of the medal gave him a sense of peace, a semblance of closure. Miles was wrong, he was the one held in esteem for being the best of brothers. Jimmy tucked the medal in his pocket, wanting his brother to share in his performance tonight.
On the way out of the bus, he met Sameera. Right now he couldn’t think about her, or them. First he’d play, then he’d handle their situation. He knew she hurt and wanted a sign that everything would be okay. And he knew deep down it would be, just not at the moment. Flipping on his signature glasses, he headed up to the stage to play the show of his life with his boys, to honor his fallen brother.
“You okay, bro?”
“Yeah, I’m good. Let’s rock this shit.” Jimmy stepped out on stage, and lifted and kissed the dog tags around his neck, like every show, in homage. The crowd went wild and Jimmy fell into the place music took him to. Played for the crowd, and his brother.
“Indianapolis, how the hell have you been? It’s been a year since we’ve been back. Thanks for surviving the rain earlier today to spend time with us. Thank you for your support. Without you all we are nothing. Ya’ll on the back lawn in all that slippery mud, let’s get rocked!” Garrick belted out the first line of Depraved Indifference, and then moved from center stage, giving Jackson room to stand in front of new faces. While Shea screamed into the mic, he banged his head in time with the drum beat performing his solo next to Jimmy. The crowd ate up the energy and threw it back tenfold. They followed up with their new song, Twisted Vengeance, written by Shea, then teased the women in the audience with Rhapsody and Last Chance sung by Jackson.
Jimmy shook his head at all the ladies screaming Jackson’s name. “You are a god,” he yelled into the mic and began the chords for their song, Powerless. Jackson strutted past him to get in a dig, play a riff for the ladies and wink down into the audience.
The song hit its climax and crashed down with the final beat from Shea. Jimmy let his fingers fly teasing the crowd with his musical genius, and blended harmony between he and Jackson, then hit his final stance.
Garrick grabbed his jug of water and took a swallow. “How the fuck ya’ll doing back there?” He raised a shot of liquor. “To all our soldiers out there protecting and serving, and those who have protected and served in any capacity. We thank you. We love your sacrifice and fuck we love you all period.” He tossed back the shot. “We’re bringing you something new to the table. Take a ride with me and the guys. Hollow was written by Jimmy. We know lyrics get leaked. If you know the words sing with us. Hell, follow the prompt on the screen we’ll toss’em up.” On each side of the backdrop two plasma screens lit up with the lyrics. Garrick sung the lyrics with the gravelly voice the women screamed for. Jimmy watched in awe as the fans sung what he’d created.
Verse 1
All I wanted was your respect.
Learned early on what I’d never get.
Your hate, fists, words, broke me down.
My face a transgression you’ll never forget.
Acts of vengeance against a bastard child.
Chorus
Take a good look at what you've done to me.
Lacerated, desecrated reasons never validated.
Glass house, glass child, glass man
Eviscerated I sit with nothing to give
Worthless engraved in my skin while he gets it all,
Yeah he gets, it all. The good, the bad. The good, the bad,
He gets it all. Your support, your love, your praise.
Lacerated, desecrated reasons never validated.
Glass house, glass child, glass man
Glass house, glass child. Glass man.
Verse 2
Her sins made me, deprived me, where’s the love
to revive me. Desperate to love, to trust, too haunted
see, too tormented to believe there’s good in me. Self-hate churning,
dragging me down an endless abyss, his face, his rage, torn by her
scorn, hating I was born.
Chorus
Look at what you've done to me.
Eviscerated I sit with nothing to give,
Worthless engraved in my skin while he gets it all,
Yeah, he gets it all. The good, the bad. The good, the bad.
He gets it all. Your support, your love, your praise.
Verse 3
Can't forget the memories.
Can't escape the triggers. Lost in her regret. Strangled in your hate.
Tip the bottle to the head find some peace at last.
Slow deep burn.
Slow deep burn. Killing me. Killing me.
Chorus
Look at what you've done to me.
Eviscerated I sit with n
othing to give,
Worthless engraved in my skin while he gets it all,
Yeah, he gets it all. The good, the bad. The good, the bad.
He gets it all even in death. Your support, your love, your praise.
Lacerated, desecrated reasons never validated.
Glass house
Glass child, forgetting how to feel to survive.
Glass house
Glass man
Glass house, glass child. Glass man.
“Yeah, that was one hellacious song. How about we lighten up with a good ole song about sex. Fuck drugs, we don’t do that shit or condone it, not in our band, but damn sex makes everyone feel better. Shea drop the beat for Sex Slave. Jimmy fondle that board like your woman’s clit. Make it dirty, you know they like your dirty ass. Jackson, make her hungry, make her ravenous for a taste of your fingers across the fretboard.”
Jimmy shook his head. Leave it to Garrick to remind them of their over sexual song that never got played on air. He chuckled while his friend spoke dirty to every female in the audience with his words and evocative imagery. Stroking his guitar, Jimmy gave the fans a lewd gesture, swiveling his hips, punctuating his chords with staccato strokes. In his peripheral, he noticed Sameera standing by watching, but kept his gaze on the mass in front of him.
Jumping around stage sucked the remaining energy from him. Garrick flew into the next song without preamble, keeping the fast pace, the amped energy and jumping with the pyrotechnics created by Nev. Twenty minutes later, they wrapped up their set with Uncommon Enemy. Jackson stepped to the edge of the stage and tossed his pic at a fan. Shea tossed up his drumsticks and caught them. Kissing the end of each one, he hurled them into the middle of the pit.
“Thank you, Indianapolis. We love you. Goodnight.” Garrick crumpled up the set list and tossed it in the eager sea of fans while Jimmy tossed two of his pics into the rampaging crowd anxious to have a memento.
They headed off stage to freshen up and grab some food in the green room. Jimmy passed Vin with a lovely redheaded bombshell on his lap, locked in conversation. He shook his head and headed into the room. Shelby, his regular for Indianapolis, stood and sashayed over to him.
“Hey lover, thought we could hook up while you’re here. It’s been awhile.” She ran a red painted fingernail down his chest, leaned in and trailed her hand over his dick.
“How’d you get back here?” He knew of course. Jacob wanted Sam for himself. “Tonight’s not a good night for me. I’ll have to pass.” He motioned to his guard, Mason. “Please see Miss Shelby out and prevent her from coming backstage ever again.”
“You don’t have to be a bastard, maybe one of the guys in Final Regret would love to have my company.”
Jimmy laughed. “No. Goodbye, Shelby.” Sam came in at the tail end of the conversation. He saw the flare of jealousy flash across her eyes before she banked it. Grabbing a beer and a sandwich, he plopped down.
“Hey, good show.” She sat next to him and tucked her feet under her.
“Glad you liked.” Jimmy ate his food in silence and drank his beer. When he was done, he got up to grab a handful of cookies and a bottle of soda, sat down and resumed eating. Shea and Jackson ran through, cell phones to their ears. He didn’t envy them, having to check in and be accountable for their whereabouts. Pussy whipped in love fuckers.
“Are you okay?”
Sam probed and he admired her ruthless determination to smooth things over. Jimmy shoved a cookie in his mouth and chewed. Fuck no, he wasn’t okay. “I’m not in the mood to talk.”
Sam trailed her hand up his thigh. “What are you in the mood for?”
“Space.”
“I thought maybe we could go back to the bus and talk.”
Double chocolate chip and macadamia nut cookies melted in his mouth. After he finished his dessert, he turned to Sam. “Meerkat, what do you want from me? Assurances? To trust you? You should’ve given me the letter as soon as you received it. I thought you were hiding something from me with how you reacted yesterday all weird and flighty when you rushed out to start dinner.”
“Trouble in paradise already? We have weeks left on the road. Best to nip that shit in the bud before we pull out.” Garrick slapped him on the shoulder. “Night, Sam. Nev says hello.”
“When you’re on a bus people always meddle.” Jimmy sighed. “Sam, sit back, relax and grab some food. I’m going to grab seconds.”
“Okay.”
Jimmy left her on the couch and loaded up a plate of food.
Sam filled her own plate and went to sit with her bandmates giving him the desired space he’d requested.
Halfway through his plate, Trish stormed into the room clearly in a mood over something. Once she saw him, she beelined for him.
“I didn’t do it.” He chuckled, knowing her crazy panic look, one he’d caused many times before.
“We have to talk. Like now. Grab your plate and bring it to the bus.”
He dawdled. Snagged another handful of cookies and stacked them on the plate next to a pile of chips, pickle and meat loaded sub.
“Now.” The click of her heels double timing down the corridor cracked him up. He followed her out to the bus.
“Where’s the fire?”
Instead of answering, she dialed a number on her cell phone.
“Officer Creighton. I have Jimmy O’Riley here with me now.” She handed him the phone.
“This is Jimmy. I haven’t broken any laws that I know of. Do you have some warrant for my arrest? If so can it wait until the tour is over. I’d happily take over any assumed issue.”
“I’m afraid, Mr. O’Riley, I have some troubling news for you.”
“Tonight seems to be the night for it. What can I do for you?” Jimmy shot Trish a look. She shrugged and mouthed, “I don’t know what’s going on.”
“We’re going to need you into fly to Montgomery, Alabama tonight to pick up a package. I’m sorry we can’t go into detail over the phone. Our business should only take a day or two at most. We understand you’re on a tight schedule. You’ll need to make some preparations before you leave, aside from that. When is the soonest you can get here?”
Jimmy frowned. “I can grab a commercial flight and be there as soon as possible. Are you certain you can’t divulge what this is all about? I don’t like flying blindly into shit.”
“I think it’s better for all if we discuss the situation in person. We’ll await your personal assistant’s call with your flight information and pick you up personally.”
“Okay.” He hung up the phone. “Trish what the fuck is going on?”
“I don’t know. They were really cryptic. Whatever is going on, it’s damned important. You’re on the next flight to Montgomery. Thankfully they had a first class seat left. A car is here to take you now.”
“Fine. What are you going to tell Garrick?” Jimmy grabbed his backpack and shoved a fresh set of clothing into the bag.
Trish led him out to a town car. “I’ll tell him there was a family emergency. Text me if you have problems. Sorry we couldn’t get the jet here soon enough. I will have it on standby in Montgomery to bring you back to us. Try to be back for the next show. You have all day tomorrow and most of the evening. Let me know if there’s an issue so we can have someone fill in for you. Really, call me when you know what the hell is happening.”
“Thanks.” Jimmy laid his head back against the plush seats trying to get a handle on what was going down in Montgomery. The driver raised all windows and left the underground parking spot. After dialing Sameera’s number, he reached her voicemail. “Meerkat, had to take an emergency trip, not sure what’s going on. I’ll hit you up when I know more,” he paused. “Sam, I forgive you. Sleep tight.”
Extending an olive branch was the right move. Putting on his ear buds, he relaxed.
Chapter Eight
“Welcome to Montgomery, Mr. O’Riley, we’re glad you came. You must be tired, I can’t imagine a four hour commercial f
light was comfortable.”
“Thank you. I did manage to get some sleep.” Jimmy tossed his backpack on his shoulder and donned a baseball cap and sunglasses.
“Mind if I see some credentials?”
“Of course.” Officer Creighton took out his badge. “Do you have any luggage?”
“No. Just this. Can you tell me what is going on?”
“I know you’re anxious but this is a delicate manner. We’ll escort you by car to our destination. You should be able to sleep for a few more hours.”
“Where are we headed to?”
“Valley, Alabama.” The officer led him through the massive airport to the taxi stand. “Perks of being in law enforcement.”
Scenarios and questions ran through his head. Did he get someone pregnant in Alabama? Or something else equally bad.
“Sir, with all due respect. This is nuts. I’ve flown here as requested for whatever secret thing you have going on. I need answers.”
“The social worker asked me to maintain her confidence and wait until we got to the daycare to give you information. I can see you’re not going to let up. In short, your deceased brother, Miles, has a daughter. Her mother recently passed away, due to untreated appendicitis. She has no other family. The child, Millicent, is all alone.”
“You’re joking, right?” Jimmy put his hands to the bridge of his nose. “My brother wouldn’t have kept a child a secret from me. We told each other everything. Are you certain you haven’t made a mistake?”
“Reggie, the mother, left a living will, naming your brother and yourself as emergency contacts. I take it she didn’t know he passed away. Through her records we tracked down other members of your brother’s team who corroborate the two had a lengthy affair at one point in time. It is possible he didn’t know, with his job and unavailability, she may not have told him.”
“How old is my niece?” He prayed his saintly brother did not cheat on Sam.
Kiss Me Deadly Page 13
