by Anne R. Tan
“Psst. Raina,” Gail called out. The sliding glass partition above the front counter was opened. She was in the middle of stuffing paper into folders, but her bright eyes and slightly parted lips suggested something more enticing might be at work. No one could get that hot and heavy while filing.
Raina’s frenemy antennae vibrated in warning. Either Gail wanted something or she had department gossip waiting to spillover. Neither option held any appeal at the moment.
“It’s about the fundraiser,” Gail fake whispered with one hand next to her mouth.
Raina walked over and leaned her elbows on the wooden front counter, resting her chin on her hands. “I’m all ears. Is Olivia giving the grad students more paid hours this semester?” She did some quick mental calculations. If she got five extra hours a week, she should be able to pay for a new set of tires by the end of the month. Why, she could even charge it now and then pay off the bill when it came.
“No.” Gail paused. “The exact opposite.”
A knot settled in Raina’s stomach. Forget new tires. She might have to eat ramen for the rest of the semester.
“The Dean axed Olivia’s idea of having the grad students work on the fundraiser. He wants to only pay them for their teaching assignments. So the grad students would truly be ‘volunteering’ their time.” Gail’s fingers curled into air quotes.
The secretary gave Raina a closed-lip smile that was meant to be sympathetic, but her eyes twinkled. Raina returned with a half smile of her own and continued to the conference room after thanking her for the heads-up. She didn’t want to give the receptionist more fuel for her gossip.
Raina peeked in the room. Sol, wearing his signature stained T-shirt and a greasy ponytail, rested his chin on his palms, staring at his coffee cup. The conference room, newly decorated with light maple furniture and sleek mesh office chairs, was out of character with the rest of the much older history building. Her nose twitched at the smell. Even the building’s modern HVAC couldn’t get rid of the old musty paper odor that hinted at rat droppings hidden between yellowed pages. She glanced at the wall clock and ducked back into the hall.
“Raina!” Sol said.
Not fast enough. Ten whole minutes of small talk was exactly what she needed first thing in the morning.
Raina sat across from Sol and mumbled good morning. She pulled out her cell phone, hoping he would take the hint.
Sol tapped the coffee sleeve on his cup. “I stopped by yesterday, but you weren’t home. What are you doing Sunday afternoon?”
The college had assigned Sol to show her around campus when Raina first arrived a year ago. Since that one fateful meeting, the grad student had been badgering her for a date at every encounter. “I’m busy.”
Sol scratched his paunchy stomach. “Is it because I'm fat?”
“I'm just not interested. Sorry.”
Sol took a large gulp of his coffee. “Uh-huh.” A thin dribble slid around his chin and plopped on his chest. His T-shirt now sported a small brown dot in the middle of the existing pale green stain.
Raina glanced at the clock and tapped her pen on the table. If she kept this up for the next three minutes, would he stop talking?
“Why did you go out with Holden?” His hazel eyes darkened as he sneered. “You fell for his charm. Just like everyone else. Everyone thinks he is so smart. Writing his groundbreaking new book. Ha! He can’t even name his sources.” He threw the coffee sleeve at the table; it slid and hit her hand.
“None of your business.” Raina flicked the sleeve back at him. How many others knew about her secret relationship?
Sol reddened and his shoulders slumped. His flash of aggression popped like a bubble. The wall clock ticked uncomfortably until Cora rushed in with a tray of coffee. Raina exchanged pleasantries with the blonde student assistant, ignoring Sol.
Olivia and Andrew followed on her heels. Andrew’s animated ruddy face contrasted oddly with his flat monotone voice when he answered his boss. They grabbed a coffee without glancing at the student assistant.
Holden strolled in, wearing a wrinkled shirt and gray trousers. Raina knew the exact moment he saw her. His step paused discernibly. He sat on Raina’s other side and reached across to grab a coffee. The scent of his spicy aftershave lingered in her nose. At his mumbled thanks, Cora looked at her lap and blushed.
Olivia frowned at the exchange. The thick mascara lashes twitched like spider legs wrapping an insect for lunch. She watched his face and tapped her watch. “About time.”
Cora pushed her thick glasses up her face and hunched her bony shoulders as if she could blend in with the furniture by hunkering down.
Holden shrugged and took a sip of the coffee. Raina wondered if there was any truth to the rumor that Holden and Olivia were ex-lovers. The man had nerves of steel. If her boss spoke to her in that accusatory tone, she wouldn’t be drinking coffee like she had all the time in the world.
Olivia droned on about what an honor it was to be chairperson of the committee again. Raina wanted to poke her eyes out. The others in the room threw out half-hearted suggestions, but it soon became clear that Olivia was looking for automatons to do her bidding.
After a few more minutes of Olivia’s soliloquy, Raina cleared her throat. “I heard the grad students wouldn’t get paid for their time.”
Olivia flipped her fake, youthful, chestnut hair over her thickly padded shoulder. “Yes, the Dean announced his decision this morning. But it’s still a good networking opportunity.”
“I really can’t afford to volunteer my time.”
“Surely you can make time to help with this noble cause.” Olivia’s smile faded and her eyes narrowed. She leaned in and lowered her voice. “Think about how many classes you’ll have with me to finish your degree. This will be a great networking opportunity.”
Raina pressed her lips into a tight line. So, if she stopped showing up, Olivia Spider Lashes was going to make her entire grad school experience miserable. For a moment, nausea assaulted her. She’d given up her engineering career for this? To be in a power play with a woman who thought youth could be found in a bottle of hair dye and a mascara tube?
Raina’s hands grew clammy at the silence in the room. Everyone avoided eye contact—either watching the clock, doodling on their notepads, or picking at their nails. She had no idea why the department head wanted her on the fundraiser committee, but she didn’t believe for a minute it was for her computer skills. She sighed and nodded.
Olivia beamed and returned to her monologue.
Raina massaged the sides of her head. She should have… done something. A twitching fly caught in a web had more fight than what she’d just given. There was always the dead grandma excuse. She didn’t want to sink to that level, but Olivia had left her with no choice.
She froze when Holden squeezed her knee under the table. He slid a note into her lap. She glanced at Olivia and then at the note.
WE NEED TO TALK.
She balled up the paper and slipped it in the pocket of her shorts.
After an hour, Raina raised her hand. “Where are the snacks?”
Olivia’s face darkened at the interruption as she glanced at the clock.
Andrew’s face got even redder. “Sorry, Lori will be here with the snacks as soon as she is done with the photo shoot of our backyard for the Garden Club’s newsletter.”
Olivia announced a short break and Raina rushed out along with the others. They scattered like roaches at the end of a flashlight beam.
Raina pulled out her work schedule from her purse. It didn’t look like Olivia would wrap up the meeting any time soon. She would have to skip lunch to make it to her shift at the computer lab. Her annoyance increased with each step she took toward the vending machines by the stairwell.
A few minutes later, Raina leaned against the vending machine and stuffed mixed nuts into her mouth. She closed her eyes at the guilty pleasure. Chocolate and salt for lunch. Yum. Her mother would be horrified.
H
er skin prickled as if she was no longer alone. Raina opened her eyes to find Holden standing in front of her, blocking her exit. She jerked and banged her elbow on the trashcan. Stifling a yelp, she clutched the bag of nuts to her chest. The silence stretched until the low rumble from her stomach snapped Raina from her deer-in-headlights position.
“Do you have my money?” Raina popped a nut into her mouth, trying to appear nonchalant after her initial surprise. The nut irritated her dry mouth and stuck in her throat. She coughed, hoping to dislodge it without hacking.
“I never intended for things to end the way they did. You surprised me yesterday.” Holden leaned against the wall. Sweat beaded on his upper lip. “In a good way.”
Raina held up a hand. “Wait.” It would be just her luck for Holden to want a baby.
“Let me finish. I’ve spent the whole night thinking about the baby. I think we could be great together—”
“If you have feelings for me, how come you haven’t paid me back? I’ve been asking for weeks.” Raina leaned against the soda machine and crossed her arms. Darn! Since when did he want to be a father?
Holden paled and held onto his stomach. “It’s complicated.”
Her heart hammered against her chest. “It’s always complicated.”
“I’m so ashamed. I wished—”
The sounds of clattering footsteps increased in volume as several people walked down the staircase. Holden glanced behind him and froze as Olivia strolled by, pointing at her watch.
Raina’s breath came out in a small whoosh. As she rushed past Holden, his arm snaked out and clamped onto hers.
“We have unfinished business. Stop by my office this evening.” He whispered, “Please.”
Raina rushed off without a backward glance. This evening? No way. She was going home after her shift. Holden had his chance; it was not her fault he got interrupted by Olivia. He could play any games he wanted, but she wasn’t engaging. She was better off with another part-time job after she got out of “volunteering” her time for the fundraiser.
Olivia glanced at the clock when Raina slipped into her seat. Big deal. So Raina was a few minutes late. It was not as if she missed anything important. Holden didn’t even bother coming back to the conference room.
“As I was saying, Raina could organize the donor’s list. You’ll also need to ask them to give us something for the silent auction.” Olivia slid a pile of papers across the table. “Mention that it’s a tax deduction. It usually works.”
Raina blinked. “But I’m an introvert.”
Olivia nodded and wrote something on her planner. “I’m sure you’ll do fine. Lori can help you.”
“Lori isn’t even here.” Raina glanced apologetically at Andrew. “I’m sure your wife wouldn’t want to get stuck talking to all the donors.” She eyed Olivia. “I thought you wanted me on the committee to help with the computer stuff.”
Olivia winked, twitching her black spider lashes. “The donor’s list is on a spreadsheet. You’ll need to update it and print out thank you cards later.”
Raina pressed her lips together to prevent a snarky comment from escaping. Olivia wanted computer skills for a spreadsheet? Her grandmother was so dead. She apologized silently to her ancestors. Yep, she’d send out an email with the excuse tomorrow morning. Besides, she didn’t want to spend any more time with Holden if he wanted them to work things out because of a baby. Why couldn’t he be like a normal man and just hand her money to get rid of his problem?
3
CAT IN A TREE
Raina squinted against the glare of the early evening light glinting off the windows as she climbed the main stairs to the Steinburg History Building. She hadn’t planned on meeting Holden after her shift, but his text messages were too enticing to ignore. She knew all about curiosity and the cat, but there was something to be said for satisfaction.
Maybe she’d learn why he broke things off without an explanation. Some women might think closure was overrated in a brief relationship, but she’d bet they didn’t have an ex-boyfriend who treated love like a revolving door. Closure was important.
Leaning against the handrail, Raina pulled out her cell phone to bring up Holden’s last message again.
I HAVE THE CASH. WAITING FOR YOU.
This better not be a ploy to lure her to his office. Holden wasn’t reacting as she predicted he would. He should be avoiding her. He should be demanding proof or denying responsibility. Instead, this was the second message Raina had received since he cornered her this morning by the vending machine.
Distant sirens broke the tranquility of the lazy August day. She looked behind her and didn’t see anything unusual. Campus employees hurried to the parking lots, probably eager to get home after a day of work. A handful of students tossed a Frisbee on the lawn. She shrugged, as the sirens got louder. The evening news would undoubtedly report on the sirens. Even a cat stuck in a tree got at least thirty seconds in Gold Springs.
Raina closed her phone and stuffed it back into her purse. With squared shoulders, she marched up the rest of the stairs and into the lobby. This could be the last time she needed to interact with Holden on a personal level. Once the money was firmly locked in her bank account, she would have a photo-burning ceremony with her friends Ben and Jerry to cleanse him from her life.
Her sneakers squeaked in the empty corridor. The front desk stood in silent sentry to her passage. Gail had probably gone home for the day. She turned the corner and the open door of Holden’s office beckoned at the end of the hall. Her steps slowed and a knot settled in her stomach. She wiped the perspiration off her forehead with the back of her hand. She’d forgotten the campus turned off the air conditioner after hours during the summer.
A muffled buzz from her purse distracted Raina from further thoughts of the HVAC system. It better not be a message from Holden telling her he’d left already. She pulled her cell phone from her purse and flipped it out.
A whoosh of air threw Raina’s hair into her eyes. Her stomach lodged in her throat as the scents of lemon cleanser and vomit hit her. She turned toward the opened door and froze. A large person charged out of the men’s restroom and slammed into her. They fell into a tangled heap on the tiled floor. Raina gasped as the air flew out of her lungs and her cell phone clattered onto the floor.
Raina struggled to push the person off her. Her hands encountered the softness of a woman’s body. She brushed the hair off her eyes and saw a unibrow on an ashen face. Gail? Her heart thumped painfully against her chest.
Gail grabbed Raina’s arms, digging her talon-like nails into the skin. Her flared nostrils made tiny squeaks with each labored breath. “My…my phone!”
Raina winced at the pain and batted at Gail’s clammy hands. She shivered at the bulging eyes and crossed her arms in front of her. “Are you okay? Do you need me to call someone?”
“I need to stay on the line!”
Raina crawled over to her phone, grabbed the shattered screen, and popped the battery back in. “Mine is toasted. Where’s your phone?”
Gail pointed a trembling hand at the men’s restroom. “In there.” A small moan slipped from her pale lips. “Holden’s dead.”
Raina shook her head. Had Gail been drinking? She didn’t smell alcohol on the secretary. “He texted me an hour ago.” Her voice came out squeakier than she intended.
Gail closed her eyes. “He’s dead. He’s dead.”
Raina shook her head again. Dead? She opened her mouth and closed it. There had to be some other explanation. She got up on wobbly legs and tiptoed the short distance to the men’s room door. With shaking hands, she pushed it open. A body lay on the floor, the head cocked at an odd angle. She jerked at the loud bang behind her and dropped her hand. She backed away, glad she didn’t have time to see more.
The clamor of footsteps grew louder. Three uniformed men and a woman filled the hallway. The entire police force was on duty. Gail covered her mouth with her hands, but the moans continued to escape. As i
f from a great height, Raina watched a couple of the officers enter the restroom. Another officer ducked into the doors along the hall. Cold seeped into her body and Raina shivered. She felt disconnected from the activity before her. The noise should have been deafening, but there was only a roaring in her ears as her heart thumped rapidly.
A gentle touch on her arm snapped Raina back into her body. She blinked, feeling lightheaded. Someone had thrown a blanket around her shoulders. She clutched it tight against her body as if it were a life preserver.
“Please follow me.” A policewoman gripped Gail under her elbow and half supported her toward the lobby.
Raina stumbled after the two women, touching the walls occasionally to keep from floating away. Holden just died. She tripped and fell on the tiled floor. The sharp pain from her knees was an improvement to the numbness in her body.
The policewoman asked if she was okay, and Raina nodded mechanically. At the lobby, the policewoman opened the office door and helped Gail into a chair. She huddled underneath a blanket, moaning as tears continued to run down her face.
Raina leaned against the front counter in the lobby. She closed her eyes and took deep breaths. Her heart rate had returned to normal during the walk, but she still felt chilled to the core. Someone pushed a warm mug into her cold hands. Her nose twitched at the burnt day-old coffee scent. She inhaled it greedily. This was something she understood.
She opened her eyes to thank the person, expecting the policewoman. A jolt went up her spine and Raina stiffened. A tall Asian man in a knit polo with an embroidered badge stood in front of her. Their eyes locked and a low buzzing sounded in her ears. Little spots of light danced before her eyes as her brain registered who she was seeing.
E. Matthew Louie?
He gave her a curt nod. “Rainy.”
The coffee mug slipped from her hands and clattered on the floor. Her eyes followed its downward descent. She stared in horror as the dark liquid spilled across the floor, splattering brown droplets against Matthew’s brown dress shoes and khaki pants. Her mind had to be playing tricks on her, digging up her past at this stressful moment. She glanced at her hands. No hives yet.
