by David Smith
“NOW YOU GO TOOOOO FAR!!!! You insult my honour and my professional integrity!! Go now! Leave!” the Counsellor shouted as he turned his back, shaking with rage, furious with Dave.
“But Counsellor, we have to make the Captain see sense…..”
“Sense is a subjective term; the Captain has his reasons for following his course of action. Now go away, I will not assist in your wicked machinations!”
Dave walked to the door. “No wonder you couldn’t help the computer. You have no concept of any value system other than your own. The blood of the Sha T’Al is on your hands, too.”
It was a cheap shot, and Dave felt bad as soon as he said it. However, he felt considerably worse when the wild-eyed Counsellor grabbed a kendo sword from his wall and attacked him…..
--------------------
Dave woke up face down in sick-bay. He felt dazed and sick, and his arse was killing him.
He tried to turn over, but his arm and ribs hurt too much. A soft beep drew the attention of a nurse and she called Commander Mengele, who arrived shortly after in her severe, starched white housecoat.
An orderly helped the nurse to sit Dave upright while the Doctor addressed him.
“You have a broken left radius, a broken collar bone and three cracked ribs, all of which will heal quickly. However, I cannot cure you of stupidity” she stated bluntly.
“Lieutenant-Commander Ozawa has a history of attacking patients. As Executive Officer, you should know this.”
Dave groaned “I was just trying to do the right thing”
“As long as “the right thing” entails pain, broken bones and wasting my time you might consider yourself successful”
“All I did was float the notion that the Captain may be unfit for duty due to his sex-addiction” Dave said, genuinely upset. “The Sha T’Al are dying out because of his inaction.”
The Doctor drew a deep breath, and if Dave hadn’t been doped up to the eyeballs with pain-killers he’d have heard the unmistakable crackle of PVC underwear.
“I agree. I suggest we remove the Captain from the chain of command”
“Wuh??”
“I said I agree with you.”
“Really????”
“Yes. Come with me.”
Dazed, and now even more confused, Dave hobbled after the Doctor as quickly as his bruised and battered body would allow.
“Your plan has merit, but proving mental incompetency is difficult and long winded. I suggest we take a more direct approach.”
She stopped at the window of an isolation suite. Looking through the thick glass Dave saw a small, pretty oriental girl in a medical gown.
The Commander smiled slightly as she pointed to the girl “Physical incapacity is much easier to prove. This is Nurse Pui Xiao. She is recovering from Arcturian syphilis.”
--------------------
As a replacement for the recently transferred Yeoman Turner, Yeoman Pui Xiao discharged her duties excellently. The fact that she had no grasp of Starfleet regulations or procedures, or even the English language, had no bearing on the Captains view of her abilities.
The Steward confirmed later that he had received a communication direct from the Captain requesting that the new yeoman be placed at the head of the Yeomen’s duty roster immediately and for the foreseeable future.
While the Captain spent the next two days thoroughly debriefing the latest addition to the ships yeomanry, Dave concentrated his efforts on ways to keep the Tiger’s other senior officers “occupied”.
A trip to the Botany and Hydroponics areas on Deck 22 proved interesting. As expected, Dave found a startled crewman tending a variety of exotic plants from the Hemp family.
A quick call to the Science Officer saw her attend immediately, bringing with her PO Carys Van der Vaart, who happened to be a talented bio-chemist.
“So, can we extract the active ingredients from these plants and concentrate it in some way?” asked Dave.
“The active ingredient is Tetrahydrocannabinol or THC. It’s easy to extract in a variety of forms to increase its concentration, but that varies from plant to plant. If we go for hash oil, it’s dangerously strong if used incorrectly. If I could make a suggestion though, it would be more predictable and also easier to hide an artificial compound. We just add it to his existing stock of the prepared plant”
“You can spike his Ganja??”
“Yes sir. It’s been done before if I’m honest. Just to see what would happen we slipped some speed into the mix once.”
“What happened?”
“It was bizarre: He just chilled even quicker!” she shook her head “Anyhow, I figure a variant of LSD should produce interesting and disabling results quite safely, with the added benefit of lasting for a considerable length of time with no harmful side-effects.”
“Perfect. Although I have to admit I’m slightly worried about how you got to be such an expert in these matters?”
The young PO looked at him quizzically “Didn’t you go to College?”
--------------------
Dave considered simply ignoring Commander Cassini. Lieutenant-Commander Romanov had no qualms about completely disregarding his instructions, but in any event he still out-ranked Dave and could theoretically assume command of the ship if he saw fit to.
The trouble with Cassini was that he never, ever left the engineering decks, and……….
A thought occurred to Dave. He never left engineering.
“Computer, how long has Commander Cassini spent on the Engineering Deck in the last year?”
“The Commander has only left Engineering on three occasions, totaling four hours, eight minutes and twenty-two seconds.”
“So as the Engineering Department is listed as his duty station, technically he’s been on duty for the entire 365 days, barring those three excursions? And I assume that has been his habit since joining Tiger two years ago?”
“Correct.”
--------------------
“Commander Cassini, I need to speak to you concerning your duty roster”
“Not now, I’m busy.” He terminated the call.
Dave called back immediately “Commander, this will not wait.”
“What do you want?” he asked testily.
“You’ve been on duty all but four hours in the past calendar year, Commander. The ship’s Doctor tells me that is not an acceptable state of affairs. Starfleet regs require all personnel to undertake at least eight hours of rest and recreation time every week aside from clearly defined exceptional circumstances. You have therefore accumulated at least fifty-two rest periods that the chain of command is obliged to honour according to regs.”
“With the approval of the ship’s Doctor I am authorising you to clear your accumulated R&R periods. You are relieved of duty for the next twenty-three days.”
--------------------
Dave had enjoyed cutting off the comm line as Cassini raged against his orders, against ridiculous regulations and against jumped up junior officers. Dave was actually impressed that the Commander could not only swear fluently in two languages, he could even switch between languages in mid curse. He delighted as he cut the comm line dead every ten seconds or so, only for Cassini to call back with another burst of invective.
Cutting the comm-link just seemed to wind the Engineering Officer up even more, and although enjoying it, Dave knew he had many other things to be getting on with. He considered leaving the channel open and sneaking off, just to find out how long Cassini could rant before realising there was no-one at the other end, but he decided it would probably be best to just put an end to the matter for once and for all.
“Commander Cassini, as you’ve questioned my authority and my interpretation of the regulations (not to mention my sanity and parentage), let me just explain the chain of command in this particular circumstance. It goes like this:”
“You shut up and do as your told, or I get Chief Belle to come down to Engineering and shoot you.”
&n
bsp; There was a pause in the invective as Cassini considered the likelihood of this.
“And I have to tell you, she’s really looking forward to it” Dave added.
The line went quiet.
“The computer tells me that in three years on Tiger you’ve only spent time in Engineering, the Transporter Room, the Officer’s Mess and occasionally your quarters.”
“For your information, this ship has extensive gymnasium and spa facilities, an excellent library and cinema, and several social spaces. I suggest you acquaint yourself with them over the next twenty-three days. Hollins out.”
--------------------
On the Bridge the next morning Dave took a call from Commander Mengele.
“The Captain has been admitted to sick bay suffering from an unidentified illness. In accordance with standing medical regulations I am committing him to quarantine until the nature of the illness is understood.“
“Noted. Thank you Commander.”
Dave asked the computer to confirm Commander Joynes location.
“Commander Joynes is currently in his quarters. A maintenance team is also in attendance.”
“Maintenance team?”
“Lieutenant-Commander Beauregard intimated that the floor coverings needed repair.”
Dave looked at ASBeau, who shook his head and shrugged in a very Gallic fashion, before adding “Ah, yeah. I remember now. Computer, when I said that Joynes was trippin’ in his cabin…….”
--------------------
Dave called the senior staff that were on duty to the Officer’s Mess for a conference.
“As Acting Commanding Officer, I’ve decided that we need to immediately review our current orders. Do any of you see any value in continuing with our patrol mission?”
Nobody said a word.
“Good. We’re all aware of the situation in Sha T’Al space, but have no intelligence that gives us an obvious course of action. Bearing in mind that the recently intercepted message indicated that the Sha T’Al were attempting to send aid to one of their colonies on the border with the Tana Empire, I propose that we head there immediately to offer what assistance we can.”
There were nods of approval all the way around the table.
“I want two volunteers to take Faraday, the warp-drive shuttle back to Hole and transmit all of the intelligence we’ve gathered so far back to Command and also inform them that we’re deviating from orders to attempt to offer assistance to the Sha T’Al. It'll take two days for Faraday to get back to Hole, and at least a day for the data to get to Command. Even if they dispatch ships there and then, we're looking at a couple of months for them to gather the fleet and travel here at maximum warp. In the meantime, we're on our own.”
“Helm, get us underway as soon as the shuttle is gone. Comms, I want standard greetings broadcast continuously. Science, Medical and Security are to prepare an away team.”
“Engineering?” He looked over to Lieutenant-Commander Romanov “Just get us there.”
Chapter 10
The changes were palpable. For the first time in ages, the crew had a purpose, and Dave could feel the frustration of the last few weeks fade, to be replaced by tension, anxiety, but most of all determination.
Speed was of the essence, but the 9.1 light-year trip would take much longer than it had for the faster probes. Even when pressed, Romanov wouldn’t let them take Tiger above Warp 7. She was concerned that stressing the ships systems might lead to a cascade failure of the recently repaired power relays. In the worst case, this could immobilise the ship deep in alien space with no hope of rescue and only a limited chance of repairing the damage themselves.
At that speed, the trip would take nearly ten days, but at least that gave them more time to work on the ships other systems and prepare the away team thoroughly.
Dave spent much of the transit time on the shuttle deck and in the maintenance shop below it. Stavros had managed to get the warp drive shuttle operational, but the rest of the fleet were in a poor state of repair. The last race between Stavros and Crash had ended with some ridiculously high-gee maneuvers, and a metallurgical survey of those two shuttles suggested that neither could be safely returned to service. Another shuttle had already been cannibalised to provide structural components for her sisters, and the other two shuttles were in a questionable state.
Hawking, the shuttle they’d flown down to Hole had expired when PO Starr had loaded it to the gunnels with food for the party. It was potentially repairable, but had more faults than Stavros could remember. The remaining shuttle, Fermi, was theoretically serviceable, but even Stavros seemed to distrust it.
“I’m not convinced she’ll hold together when we hit atmosphere” he admitted.
In desperation, they even examined Chief Money’s private cargo shuttle. Bigger than the Starfleet shuttles, she had the disadvantage of being built to alien standards with alien equipment. They didn’t have a clue if it would even work.
In the end, Dave had to make a decision.
“Ok Stavros, get to work on shuttle Fermi. If you still don’t have confidence in her, then we’ll give Chief Money’s alien shuttle a test run when we get there.”
“No progress with the transporters yet sir?”
“Have you noticed an improvement in the menu at the galley?”
“No sir”
“Well, that’s your answer then.”
--------------------
Lieutenant-Commander O’Mara hand-picked her part of the away team. With only one shuttle likely to be available, spaces were limited to eight, plus a pilot and co-pilot.
They needed at least one medic, two security personnel and Dave had reluctantly agreed that Lieutenant-Commander Grosvenor should go along as the only person trained in first contact procedures.
Dave desperately wanted to go himself, but conceded that it was more important for the science specialists to go and gave up his seat to make room for another specialist.
Lieutenant-Commander O’Mara was equally eager to go, but her own specialist skills weren’t as valuable as some of her subordinates, and reluctantly she gave way for a better qualified person.
Dave almost hoped that Stavros wouldn’t get Fermi working. They could get another four people aboard the larger alien shuttle, and he and O’Mara were at the head of the queue.
--------------------
The Science Department had finished their full analysis of the data from the two probes, and this dictated the final choice of mission specialists. Lieutenant Verity Selassie would cover anthropology and archaeology, Lieutenant Skye L’Amour would lead a team of three biologists and ecologists. Commander Mengele assigned her deputy Lieutenant Robert Chen as away team medic, and also nominated PO Alyssa Torres for her expertise in bio-chemistry generally and her knowledge of toxins in particular.
O’Mara had drawn up an equipment list, with most of the scientific equipment coming from her own department. Dave took the remaining list of day to day items and visited the stores on Deck 10.
PO Winston was in the office and Dave gave him the list.
The PO’s brow wrinkled as he read it: “Do you really need all this stuff?”
“No, I thought I’d hand you a completely random list to check if you can actually read” replied Dave grumpily.
The PO thought about this and eventually concluded that sarcasm was in play. He sat upright and said “Ok, read it to me and I’ll check the computer for stocks and locations.”
Dave took the list back and began to read it out.
“Generators?” he asked
“Hmm. None available sir” came the reply.
“Environmental suits?”
“None in stock at the moment”
“Heating units?”
“Uh….no. None.”
“Tents?”
“Ah, yes. Plenty” he stopped. “Oh hang on, I typed stents by mistake. Tents…. Tents…… Yep. None available.”
“So we’re better off having heart surgery
than going on an away team?”
“Looks that way, sir. On the positive side, we do have an excellent selection of genuine Aran knitwear…..”
--------------------
They finally arrived at their destination star system and Crash put Tiger into a low orbit so they could scan the surface of the inhabited planet in detail.
Lieutenant-Commander O’Mara was on the Bridge studying the sensor readings as they came in.
“Very limited life signs, far too few for the degree of construction and urbanisation apparent. Buildings are almost all intact but seem to be abandoned. Gravity is 0.72 earth norm, solar radiation low to medium. The atmosphere is breathable, surface temperatures are a little cool but nothing dangerous. Wind speeds are acceptable, zero precipitation, and some outbreaks of sunshine later in the day.”
“Tactical?”
“No traffic on short or long range scans ExO. It’s quiet as the grave” said ASBeau
“Comms?”
“Nowt, Norra dickie bird.”
“OK away team, saddle up. You’ll be travelling light but looking mighty damned stylish”
“Stavros, is the shuttle ready? Stavros?”
--------------------
It was an easy mistake to make, especially when Stavros had been working twenty hour days.
The drive controls were digital and as he’d completed repairs to the lift thrusters, he programmed a decimal point in the wrong place. The port lift-thrusters came on-line and powered up to 10% of maximum thrust, but the starboard thrusters powered up to 100%. Stavros hadn’t reset the safety protocols, and the shuttle barrel-rolled its way across the Hangar Deck flattening anything in its path. It came to rest against the outer hull wall, and the damage report was so extensive the Computer elected to list what was still intact.
“Rear toilet facility is intact although the chemicals have spilled out on the cabin floor”
A very bruised and battered Stavros sighed “Sorry ExO. It’s a scrapper.”
“Plan B then. Did you power up Chief Moneys shuttle?”
“Yes sir, but the controls are very different from a Starfleet shuttle, and I can’t read the diagnostic displays”
Dave looked across the bay towards the Chiefs shuttle and was surprised to see it had been re-painted in fleet colours and insignias, with a registry number and even a name: “10%”. He then looked at the battered remains of the shuttle Fermi
