by Sarah Nego
She bit at her lip, and silence stretched between us that felt like eons. “Okay.”
“Okay?”
She nodded. “So you know, Cristiano Ronaldo is a way better player than Pelé.”
“What?” I stumble backward and clawed at my heart. “I’m not sure this is going to work out between us if you can’t see how Pelé was the greatest player of all time.”
Luci lifted her eyebrows and shrugged. “I can go.”
I grabbed her arm and pulled her down on to the couch with me. “You aren’t getting away that easy.” I grabbed her pizza and handed it to her. “Now eat. We’ve got an A-worthy project to finish.”
Luci took the pizza and smiled at me. It might have been the first truly happy smile I’d ever seen from her. Knowing I’d had a hand in putting it there made me want this to work out even more.
Twenty
Luci
Monday
Calculus
Intro to Art
Speech
Practice
Spanish project
Mondays sucked, but a Monday night with Ryan wasn’t hard to handle. I set my empty plate on the coffee table slash crate and leaned back against Ryan’s couch. I had to keep reminding myself that this wasn’t a date. Though Ryan had made it perfectly clear that was exactly what he wanted. But soccer and grades had to come first, which was why we were finally finishing our project late on a Monday after both of us finished soccer practice.
“Okay, so that should do it. First Spanish project of the semester is done.” Ryan held up our poster with one hand and pinched his chin with the other. “I love it, Lucinda,” he said in a snooty accent that made him sound like a pretentious art buyer. “See how the photographs duplicated from a cheap printer really bring out the brightness of the captions written in … is that marker? Genius.”
I gave his shoulder a shove, and he turned to me with a goofy smile that nearly took my breath away. Ryan and I had fallen into a comfortable rhythm working together. But then every once in a while he caught me off guard with a smile or wink that reminded me how dangerous he was.
“We are absolutely getting an A on this assignment. Maybe even an A plus.” He set the poster down and pointed at the last piece of pizza, his eyebrows raised.
“You take it,” I said, patting my full stomach. “If I eat any more pizza this week, Coach is going to put me on a water-and-rice-cake diet.”
Ryan laughed and grabbed the slice of pineapple and jalapeno pizza. “Let me know if he does, and I’ll sneak you the good stuff in class.”
I stood up and stretched. Ryan’s eyes flew to the bit of skin I exposed when I raised my arms over my head. Quickly, I lowered my arms and tugged at the bottom of my t-shirt with a sailboat on it and the caption: Ship just got real. “I’m going to go to the restroom.”
Ryan jerked his thumb over his shoulder. “You know where it is.”
Careful to avoid the piles of shoes, game controllers, and other random boy things that filled their house, I made my way to the back hallway. The bathroom door was the only one open last time I was there, but there was another door open this time. I knew it was Ryan’s room because that was where he’d thrown his soccer bag when we got there after practice.
I shook my head and went to shut the door. It would be an invasion of privacy to sneak in. But something on the far wall caught my eye, and I pushed the door back open. Instead of the posters of random movies and half-naked women that hung on the walls of literally every other guy’s room I’d seen, Ryan had framed photographs.
It was wrong, but I went in anyway.
Ryan’s room wasn’t spotless, but it was cleaner than I’d expected it to be. At least there weren’t any wet towels or dirty underwear covering the floor. I stepped around the unmade bed to get a better look at the photographs. They were all black-and-white outdoor shots. Part of a building, a set of trees, a brick pathway.
I sucked in a quick breath. I’d thought they were random pictures, but the next one was clearly a fountain that stood in front of the president’s office.
“Did you get lost?”
I spun around to find Ryan leaning against the door jamb.
“I’m so sorry.” I hustled around to the other side of the bed. “The door was open, and I saw the photographs and just wanted to—”
Ryan held up his hand to stop me. “It’s okay.” He walked over, took my hand, and led me back over to the wall of photographs. His fingers were warm in mine. The skin-to-skin contact sent a tingle up my arm. This was flirting with disaster, but at some point in the last few days, that had stopped scaring me as much as it should have.
“They’re from campus.” It wasn’t really a question, but I waited for Ryan to confirm my suspicion.
He nodded. “These aren’t my best, but I like to have them up. It reminds me to stop and look at the details.”
I slowly turned to him. He’d mentioned he was into photography, but the way he’d described it, I’d imagined something far less impressive. I’d been studying design long enough to recognize that a talented eye had created these images. “You took these?”
He glanced down at me, his eyes pulled together in an expression I couldn’t read. “Yes.”
I was having trouble matching up Ryan, who flirted and joked through everything, with the photographs on the wall. They were so quiet, subtle in their beauty. Like a single bird feather on a bed of silk.
“I thought you were a business major.” I turned back to the pictures and studied them again, for the first time imagining Ryan on the other end of the lens. What had he seen in these quiet moments that made him stop and take a picture.
“I am.” Ryan took a few steps toward the door and tugged on my arm to follow him, but I held back, not ready to stop looking at what he’d created.
“Ryan,” I breathed out, my voice soft even to my own ears. “These are amazing. Why aren’t you studying photography?”
Ryan let out a harsh laugh. “Vanessa said these pictures were a waste of time. She called it my distracting little hobby.” He shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal, but I knew him in that moment, and I could tell how much her words had hurt him.
“She’s not wrong.” He turned away from the pictures and dropped his gaze to the door. “A business degree is a solid choice, and there’s nothing practical about studying photography.”
I’d never hated anyone as much as I hated Vanessa in that moment. It was enough that she was punishing the whole team because Ryan finally saw her for the heartless blood-sucker she was. But knowing she pulled him away from something he was clearly so passionate about—that was way over the line.
“Screw practical,” I blurted out and grabbed Ryan’s other hand so he had to look at me. “Do you even like studying business?”
Ryan shook his head, and the hot anger in my belly grew brighter. “These photographs are beautiful and powerful. I don’t know anything about photography, but even I can see the passion behind them. This is what you’re supposed to be doing.”
Ryan stared at me, and I could practically see his brain processing my words. He squeezed my hands tighter, and I braced myself for his rebuttal, for him to tell me that I didn’t understand how the world worked or that it was easy for me because my passion translated into a great career field.
He sucked in a breath and blew it out.
And kissed me.
His lips meeting mine took away any thoughts I had as he pulled me close. Ryan dropped my hands and ran his fingers to the back of my neck and up through my hair. His touch lit me on fire as his hands explored from my head to my shoulders, down my back, and finally landing on my hips, which he pulled tighter against him.
I gave in and pressed my hands to his firm chest and traced my fingers along the hard planes of his muscles. His tongue ran along the seam of my lips, asking for permission to enter, and I gave it to him, opening to him to deepen the kiss. His tongue tangled with mine, and I couldn’t hold back the moan erupting from my
chest. I grabbed his shoulders and closed any remaining gap between us.
My brain tried to engage and stop me from kissing Ryan, but I shut it down and let myself feel and live in the moment. All that mattered were his warm lips pressing against mine and his hands touching me like they needed the contact to survive.
I closed the door in my mind on bitter ex-girlfriends and life-changing scholarships. Forgetting all the reasons why kissing Ryan was a bad idea, I focused on all the reasons this was so right. Because I’d tried pretending I wasn’t attracted to Ryan and didn’t want him. Because I’d almost convinced myself all men were as big of a jackass as my ex. Because somehow I’d thought staying away from Ryan would guarantee I’d never get hurt again. Because I hadn’t felt this alive in months, and I never wanted it to stop.
By the time Ryan pulled back and laid one last gentle kiss on the edge of my mouth, I wasn’t sure my legs were fully capable of supporting me anymore. We stood pressed together, steadying our breaths as they mingled together.
Ryan’s hand gripped my hip, pulling me against him so there was no hiding how much I affected him. He brushed a strand of hair behind my ear, and the soft gesture sent a new round of shivers down my body.
He leaned in so his mouth ever so lightly brushed against my ear. “I know we’re supposed to be waiting until we get our grade back, but I’m not even a little bit sorry about that.”
I lifted my head until I could look him in the eyes. I’d thought I could control and schedule my college experience down to every detail and that would get me everything I’d ever wanted. But maybe everything I’d ever wanted wasn’t enough anymore.
I kissed Ryan again, a soft sweet kiss that somehow felt more intimate than the one we’d shared while naked in the river.
“Neither am I,” I said.
Twenty-One
Ryan
Wednesday
I collapsed on my bed, exhausted from another long practice. After our sorry performance last game, Coach was determined to get a win at our next game. It wasn’t that we sucked or anything, but compared to the ladies, we definitely came out worse for wear.
Scooter rapped his knuckles on the door and stuck his head in the room. “Hey, Crash and I are going to clean up and then head to Pockets for a game of pool and dinner. You in?.”
I shook my head. “Thanks, but I think I’ll grab some of the leftover pizza in the fridge.”
“That shit is gross, but suit yourself.” Scooter made a face and then ducked back into the hallway.
I’d thought the same as Scooter until Luci made me try her weird combo. It was different, but way better than I’d expected. That girl had me thinking differently about a lot of things. After only a few weeks of knowing her, she had me questioning everything from pizza toppings to my career path. And maybe that was a good thing.
I checked my phone. No new messages from her, but she could still be at practice. I fired off a quick text.
We get our project back tomorrow.
Ever since she’d left my room Monday night, I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about her or that kiss. I’d promised her if we didn’t get an A on our project I wouldn’t ask her out again. But I wasn’t sure that was a promise I could keep anymore. My balls actually curled up at the thought of never kissing her again. And maybe that made me sound like a sappy fool, but with Luci I didn’t care.
And… ;)
I grinned at her reply. Luci was a little bit sassy when she wanted to be. And I liked it. I liked every side of her.
I hope you kept your Saturday night free.
If I had it my way, we’d have our celebration date the second we got out of class, but that wasn’t possible. With both of us always in practice or games, free time was hard to come by. Saturday was the only night in the next week that we had more than an hour or two free. And I definitely wanted more time than that with Luci.
I have you penciled in.
I let out a snort laugh. I didn’t doubt for a second that she had in fact penciled in our date on her calendar. That girl had her life scheduled down to the minute. On someone else it would come across as neurotic, but on Luci, it was part of her charm. She had dreams and put her money where her mouth was when it came to making them happen. Her dedication was admirable, but it didn’t make it any easier to find time to be with her.
Too bad you have a game Friday night.
It took longer than normal for Luci to respond.
Not that I’ll get any play time.
I sighed. She still hadn’t played in a game yet, and it was starting to get to her. Not that she seemed to care that much about actually playing, but she’d somehow convinced herself that if she didn’t play, Coach Taylor would cut her and she’d lose her scholarship. I’d tried to convince her that she’d see plenty of play next season when Leanne graduated, but it didn’t seem to do much good. All I could do was try to keep her mind off the game, and I was more than willing to be her distraction.
Leaning back against my pillows, I crossed my legs and got extra comfortable before replying.
I can make sure you get all kinds of play time on Saturday.
Even as I sent the text, I could imagine Luci rolling her eyes at me.
Counting your chickens a little early. We haven’t gotten the project back yet.
Except we both knew there was absolutely no way we didn’t get an A. Professor Ramirez’s eyes bugged out when he saw our photo collage to go along with the written report. He was grinning like a kid on Christmas for the rest of class. And even if for some ungodly reason we didn’t get an A, I was still taking her out on Saturday. And based on that last kiss we shared, I had a feeling she wouldn’t fight me on it.
Thanks to spending the past few years tied to Vanessa, I hadn’t kissed a lot of girls. Six girls exactly, if I was counting. But Luci…
Something about that girl felt different. And right. I hadn’t meant to kiss her on Monday. I’d been totally prepared to wait it out until we got our A and I could take her on a real date. But then she’d told me that my pictures were good and I should go after my passion. All the things I’d always wanted to hear instead of constantly being told that photography was a waste of time and I was being childish.
My dad had never been good at that kind of thing. Not that he didn’t care. He cared a lot. Sometimes too much. Like when he talked about how much help I would be back home after I got my degree and how all my new business knowledge could make Richard and Son the garage he’d always wanted it to be.
Part of me wondered if my mom would have been the one to encourage me to chase my dreams and follow my passion. But that was one more question I’d love to ask her someday. If we had any idea where she was or how to find her.
I shook thoughts of my mom out of my head. It had been her choice to leave, and it would be my choice to move on without her. I checked my phone and smiled at Luci’s reply.
Can you give me a tiny hint for Saturday?
Sweet Lucinda who was constantly in control of her world and had the next four years planned out like a road map. It was driving her nuts that I wouldn’t tell her my plans for our date. Not that it was anything so extraordinary that it needed to be kept secret. But I liked keeping her on her toes and a little off balance. It was good for her to let go of control once in a while.
Not a chance.
I grinned and thought of her sulking in her dorm room, fuming that she couldn’t plan out the night the way she planned the rest of her life. If I were there, I’d kiss her and help her let go, even if it was just for a minute.
Without a hint I don’t know what to wear.
That brought a huffing laugh straight out of my gut. Sneaky, Luci, very sneaky. But two could play that game.
Stay naked and I’ll decide on an outfit for you when I pick you up.
Half a second later, Luci fired back an emoji sticking its tongue out.
“Jesus, dude.” Scooter had his head stuck back in my room, looking at me, his mouth screwed up like
I was covered in raw sewage.
I sat up and dropped my phone down by my leg. “What?”
Scooter rolled his eyes. “Are you texting Luci?”
My fingers itched over my phone, anxious to get back to our conversation. “So what if I am?”
Scooter stepped all the way into my room and held his hands up in surrender. “Look, man, you do you. I’m not here to stop you. But have you really thought about this?”
Warning bells went off in my head, and heat flooded my gut. “You act like I’m getting ready to propose or something. It’s just a date.”
“Yeah, okay.” Scooter scoffed and rolled his eyes again. “Sure. Just a date with a girl who’s been told she can’t date you, by your ex-girlfriend. And considering you’ve been texting her non-stop all week, I’d say this is maybe more than just a date.”
“Hey!” Heat rose out of my gut, up to my chest. Scooter was really starting to piss me off. “I’m finally free from Vanessa. I’m not about to let her dictate who I can and cannot date.”
Scooter’s face fell, and the pity there did nothing to soothe my rage. “Except you aren’t the one who’ll be paying the price if Vanessa finds out. Plus, didn’t you tell me a few weeks ago that after two years with her you didn’t want to get into anything serious?”
“It’s one date.” My voice was too loud. I didn’t want to yell at Scooter, but he was being an ass.
“All right.” Scooter backed toward the door. “We’re out of here. Enjoy your pizza.”
He left and closed the door behind him.
What the hell? Scooter and Crash had made it clear they never liked Vanessa, but neither of them had ever tried to butt into things. I almost wish they had, and then I might not have wasted two years with someone who made me miserable. But this was different. Luci was different. I thought they’d liked her. And it was only one date.
I grabbed my phone but tossed it back down again. The happy vibe I’d gotten while talking to Luci was gone thanks to Scooter.
