Scrunching up her face, Danny raised an eyebrow. “Good?”
“It means life has improved, right? It’s good to be able to forget assholes exist, even if they eventually remind you that they’re there.”
Danny’s mouth twitched downward. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. Life has been damned good.” A tiny smile settled on her face.
“Beyond Andrew, how was everything?” Nicole wanted Danny to focus on the positive of this job.
This got a real smile out of Danny and that beaming light returned to her eyes. “Well, thanks to Andrew trying to mess things up for me early on, I actually get a seven-piece orchestra instead of five-piece because of Andrew being an ass. Calvin felt like it wasn’t fair for me to think I had seven people to work with and then reduce it after Andrew got my hopes up. So, he’s making room in the overall budget for two additional musicians.”
Nicole laughed. “Really?”
“I’m serious. He said he’d make it happen and he came back to me in the afternoon to say it was a go. I’m gonna get a drummer, and I want a guitarist.” Grey eyes lit up once more at the idea. “I’m also going to grab a trumpeter since Andrew put that in my head. The one he grabbed was nothing special.”
“I’m assuming you know the ones you want.”
Danny nodded, and her smile remained. She glowed. “Oh, and I do have a title.” She sat up straight. Her voice was a chirp.
“And what is your title?”
“Musical director.” Danny grinned. “Doesn’t it sound official?”
Nicole giggled. “Yes, love, it does. As musical director, do you have complete control over the music?”
“Well, complete in the instance that Andrew can’t just come change whatever I do on a whim. Calvin has the final say, but I think it’s like that with the whole production.”
Nicole nodded. “Good.”
They pulled up to the house, and Haydn rushed the doorway, halted by the music room gate. He whined so loudly he drowned out the music they left playing for him, but his yelps weren’t enough. He stood on the gate and could jump it if he was inclined.
“Let’s set you free.” Danny opened the gate, and Haydn went right for her. He tugged her right back to the door and scratched at the doorknob with his paws. Danny shook her head. “Need to be careful. One day we’re gonna come in, and he’ll have let himself out and the entire world in.”
“Well, he’ll definitely be grounded then.” Nicole chuckled. She petted his head, and he pushed against her before turning his attention back to Danny.
Danny hugged him around the neck. “He’s hyped.”
“Do you want to take him for a walk?” Nicole asked. They’d have to think of something for him when she started school again. It was obvious being alone for nine hours wouldn’t work. She might be able to pop in and check on him, but she wasn’t sure if that’d work. He was too spoiled.
“Probably should. He’s been in the room all day. It’s pretty cramped for him,” Danny replied. He was used to being in the room for a couple of hours, but nothing like today. This was totally unfair to him, and a little shocking he hadn’t wrecked the room.
Nicole nodded. “We’ll figure something out.”
Danny left with Haydn. Maybe Danny needed the walk just as much as he did, trying to unwind from her first day at work. It must’ve been tough since Danny hadn’t asked Nicole if she wanted to walk with her.
“But, then again, she’s used to me coming in and getting comfortable before this walk,” Nicole muttered. Now, I have a chance to wrap my gift.
While Danny took care of Haydn, Nicole decided to take care of her. She’d do dinner and hopefully it’d be almost ready by the time Danny came back. She hoped to hear more about Danny’s day when they ate. Afterward, she’d see if Danny wanted a massage or something else to relax. Best of all, she’d get to give Danny the present to celebrate her first day.
Nicole moved about the kitchen, preparing a familiar meal for them. I should’ve gone shopping and got something special. Cooking wasn’t on her mind much, though. It almost seemed like unfamiliar territory, making dinner from start to finish. When was the last time she made a full meal on her own? It had been quite a long time. Usually if she wanted to give Danny a break in the kitchen, they ordered takeout. Nicole couldn’t help wondering if her using the kitchen was all right.
“Why shouldn’t it be all right? Danny’s got a full-time job. She can’t be my housewife and work all day. I should help. She walks the dog. I make the food. Why should that be a problem?” Nicole asked the air.
Her insides churned and her nerves jumped under her skin. She knew it hadn’t been all right when she finished up breakfast. Would Danny want her to make their entire evening meal? Would these changes affect their whole dynamic? Tilt them so far off their axis that they couldn’t recover? What if this was the thing to end them, after all they had come through?
No. Nicole shook her head and she convinced herself this was all right. Cooking and doing things around the house was all right. She went to the refrigerator to see what she had to work with. Nicole wanted to be able to take care of her lover. She pressed on through dinner, preparing pepper steak with white rice and black beans.
If I can’t handle Danny having a job, what happens when school starts? What happens when I graduate? What happens when I change careers? She shook her head again, trying to banish those thoughts. Focus on dinner. She wasn’t sure how, but she managed to follow that advice, seasoning the steak, and getting everything to the stovetop.
***
“Oh, man, Haydn. I moved too fast. I should’ve seen if your other mom wanted to come,” Dane muttered as Haydn tugged her down the street. Haydn wasn’t paying her any mind, happy to be in the great big world. She laughed and shook her head. “I understand.”
A happy feeling spilled through Dane as she watched Haydn bound from tree to tree. They’d have to figure what to do with their poor pup. He wouldn’t survive five whole days in the music room. Even if they left him to wander the house with music playing and the television on, he’d need attention. Not to mention, he’d have to pee. They could use pads, but they’d have to train him, and they didn’t have time for that. Plus, he was accustomed to at least one walk in the afternoon. Damn, why didn’t we think about this?
Dane scratched the bridge of her nose. “How is any of this gonna work? I’ve got all these responsibilities at home and now I’m trying to work? I gotta work, though. Can’t just bum off Nick, right, Haydn?”
Haydn yapped and tugged her a bit, which she didn’t think was a good answer. Dane sighed, being tugged in two different directions and it had nothing to do with Haydn. She wanted to take care of their home, wanted to be there for their pup, but also desired be a proper partner to Nicole.
“Nick shouldn’t have to take care of me and this job thing could be fun. I mean, it’s music, you know? Real music. I mean, yeah, I don’t get the script, and there could be changes, and Andrew’s an asshole, but it’s still music. Music that’d get reactions from an audience.” Dane inhaled and a calm settled on her. “It’s been a while.”
Haydn glanced back at her and then charged forward, yanking her along. Dane yelped and had to pull back a little. Haydn looked back again and moved at a reasonable clip, aware she couldn’t hurry thanks to her knee. His eagerness was a sign she should’ve brought Nicole along. He could pull Nicole all he wanted and she’d jog with him, give him the freedom of movement he craved.
“You’re not helping at all, you know that, boy? I expected more advice from you. I guess your day didn’t go as good as mine for you to want to talk things out. That’s another thing. I really like working. I’m sure I could have fun with this. Working with those musicians alone will be worth it. I can put up with Andrew and whatever else. We could do something really special.”
Dane took a breath and shook her head. Look, Nick wants me to work. She pushed me to go to the interview, and she’s cool with this. She turned her attentio
n back to Haydn, who took a keen interest in another tree.
***
Everything was on the stove and the table was set, waiting for the food, by the time Nicole heard the door open. Haydn charged into the kitchen, barking merrily as he nuzzled her stomach. Nicole leaned down to kiss the top of his head. He jumped up and bumped noses with her. She laughed before turning to the entryway to see Danny standing there, eyes wide and her nostrils flared. Nicole’s heart leaped into her throat. Maybe this wasn’t all right.
“How was our young man on his evening walk?” Nicole asked, wanting to distract Danny. Maybe if Danny had a second, she could process everything and figure out she didn’t need to do everything. Then, they could move on.
“He was good as always, but there’s not much for him to chase in this weather,” Danny sort of mumbled, her attention more on the nook than anything else. “I could’ve cooked, Chem.”
“I know, love, but you took the pup for a walk. We’re a team, right?” They were supposed to be there for each other. If we’re a team, then we can stand these new changes.
Danny’s mouth twisted to the side briefly. “We are, but you know, this is what I do. I mean, you work all day—”
Nicole jumped in before Danny could finish. “And now so do you and I think you’re a little more stressed since your job is new. Let me do this for you. We can have a nice quiet meal, talk about our days while I massage your leg, watch a movie, and top it all off with a bath together. What do you say?”
Danny seemed to chew it over, literally with the way she ground her teeth together. Her shoulders slumped, and she eased her way into the kitchen nook. Nicole wanted to smile, but Danny seemed defeated. We’re a team. Maybe Danny was just as worried over these changes and how they might affect their relationship. Well, maybe we can talk it out.
“Danny, I want to take care of you, like you take care of me. This is always a two-way street.” Nicole hoped the idea of give-and-take wasn’t always going to be an issue. She didn’t want Danny to feel like she always needed to shoulder so much work.
Sighing, a small pout settled on Danny’s face. Nicole slid into the seat across from her and grabbed her hand. She squeezed Danny’s hand until Danny stared at her and squeezed back. Some of the tension eased out of Nicole, and she caressed Danny’s thumb with her own. She’s just as worried as I am.
“Love, we can’t keep coming to this point. We’re in this together, we’re here for each other, and we both need and want each other, right?” Nicole said. It was good to say aloud, as it reminded her of the same.
Danny sighed. “I know, I know. It’s just…” She put her free hand through her hair. “You know I always think you do more than me and now you’re doing what I usually do.”
“Okay, but I don’t do more than you and you’re stepping out to do more for yourself. I support you in taking care of yourself. You deserve to be happy, love.”
Danny looked at her. “I was happy. I am happy.”
“The job makes you happier, right? You get to work with music in a more fulfilling way, yes?”
Danny blew out a breath. “Yeah.”
“And that’s fine, baby. I want you to be happy. I want you to work this out and see where it takes you if that’s what you want. Your life doesn’t have to revolve around me. It doesn’t have to revolve around just taking care of me. Your own health should be a priority.”
Finally, a small smile ticked onto Danny’s face. “Thank you.”
“No, thank you for being here and for being yourself. I understand why you’re nervous. Believe it or not, I’m a little troubled, too.”
Grey eyes went wide. “You okay?”
With a small smile, Nicole nodded. “We’re going through changes and things will keep changing. I worry we’ll grow apart.”
“Never.” Danny’s vow was powerful, like it could’ve moved the heavens and it came with a matching gaze. “We’ve been through a lot of changes and we come out better. We’re not the same people we were when we met, but we evolve together. We’re like…” Danny rubbed her chin with her free hand. “Okay, I don’t know any chemistry things to make a good metaphor, but we’re like stable chemicals mixed together and changing states, but staying stable, if that makes sense.”
Nicole chuckled. I can only imagine the mess I’d make of a music metaphor. “I appreciate the effort. You’re completely and totally right.” They’d been through plenty of things, tough times. Why shouldn’t they survive Danny with a real job and her changing careers? We must stay positive, and go with it. We’ll work it out as it goes.
Danny beamed and sat up a little straighter. “Like being right.”
Nicole laughed a little more. “Now, let’s eat. Plus, I have something for you. Like a congratulations gift.”
Danny’s brow furrowed in confusion, which just made Nicole smile. Leaning over, she gave Danny a small kiss at the corner of her mouth before going to check on the food. Danny got up and met her at the stove. “Why don’t you take a shower and let me finish up here?”
Nicole was about to protest, but felt like it’d be a little hypocritical to do so. Instead, she kissed Danny again before going off to take a quick shower.
By the time Nicole returned, freshly showered and in-house clothes, Danny had their plates made. Haydn was being his usual self, whining for treats and bumping Danny’s legs as she went to the refrigerator for drinks. Nicole whistled for him and he bolted over to her, fussing for treats again. Chuckling, she petted his head.
“Did he eat?” Nicole asked.
“He hasn’t touched his food. He seems to think just by being cute he’ll get treats, even if he doesn’t eat dinner.”
With another giggle, Nicole rubbed Haydn’s head. “Sorry, pup. You need to eat your dinner. No treats until you do.”
Haydn whimpered and Nicole had to kiss his head. He was too cute, especially when he nuzzled her. He seemed to understand there’d be no treats and he crept over to his food bowl. Nicole attached herself to Danny’s side, who pulled her close. Danny was also too cute.
“Ready to eat?” Nicole asked.
“Of course. Good shower?” Danny replied.
“It would’ve been better had you been in there with me.”
Danny grinned. “Well, I was promised a bath later.”
“And that invitation is always open.” It was relaxing for both of them whenever they took a bath together.
Danny’s grin widened. They sat down for dinner and discussed their days. Despite Danny’s trouble with Andrew, she seemed optimistic.
“Music’s supposed to enhance an experience, right?” Danny asked, tapping her fork against her plate.
“Unless it is the experience,” Nicole replied before eating some rice with peppers mixed in.
Danny nodded. “See, I think I wanna go with both on this. I wanna make something powerful.” She held her hands together, linking them like a chain.
“I’m sure you will. Musical genius and all.”
A cute blush flared up on Danny’s cheeks and she glanced away briefly. “Wouldn’t say genius.”
Nicole couldn’t help winking at her. “I would.”
“Anyway. What about you? What did you do today?” Danny mixed her steak and rice even more than it already was and then shoveled a forkful into her mouth.
Nicole sighed and shrugged. “I think a client sort of offered me a job, but also made it seem like she knew I’d figure out how to fuse my love of chemistry with my skilled law practice.” The idea shouldn’t appeal as much as it did, but she already found herself dreaming. I used to dream of chemistry and getting out of law. Why the change? It’s in reach. That felt like the answer and insanity.
Danny scratched her chin. “Can you do that?”
“She seems to think so.” And I want that to be true. Nicole wasn’t sure how to make it so, why she wanted to make it. Why cling to what makes me crazy? Because I’m crazy.
“But, if you can’t, she offered you a job?”
Nicole nodded. The job offer was second in her mind to the idea of marrying her current job with her future degree. “Well, her company makes natural cleaning supplies, so organic chemistry definitely could come in handy.” Working for Karisa probably wouldn’t be too bad.
“Do you want the job?” Danny asked in a soft voice, as if she knew Nicole wasn’t jumping for joy.
“I should.” But, for some reason, she wasn’t sure. Maybe it was just the hot knot of uncertainty about their future with changes. Whenever everything seemed to come up roses, she knew there were thorns among the beauty. It sat like a molten stone in her guts and quicksand under her feet. She had to be careful or she’d drown in it. “I think I need some time to adjust. Hopefully, the job will be there when I figure it out.”
Danny nodded. “Sounds good.”
They settled on watching a movie after dinner, saving the bath for right before bed. Nicole grabbed her gift while Danny found a show for them to watch. They met on the couch, having to make some room for Haydn. He took up almost as much space as the two of them.
“What’s this?” Danny asked as Nicole eased a wrapped box in her hands.
“Open it and see.”
Danny carefully did so. Nicole waited patiently as Danny inspected the box. Her eyebrows knitted close together as she held up the gift and removed the leather-bound portfolio from the container. This one was more elaborate than the one Danny already owned. It had a pocket for a tablet, if Danny ever got one, a pocket for other items, a place for business cards, notes, and other tidbits along with personalized stationery that had music notes at the corners.
“Chem, it’s beautiful,” Danny whispered as she flipped through each section of the portfolio.
Nicole smiled. “I bought it this afternoon. I thought you’d like it. I know you already have one, but it’s full of work you’ve already done. This is brand new for this momentous occasion. Use it to make some kickass music for this play. Write your heart in this, love. Okay?”
Danny grabbed her into a hug, and the embrace was enough of a promise. It was sealed with a kiss and then Nicole curled in close to Danny, who held onto the portfolio through the whole movie. Nicole rubbed Danny’s knee as best she could while they cuddled.
Learning to Walk Again Page 16
