Beneath The Lies

by Riann C. Miller

  Gavin turns his glare on me. “Kate? Not Jamie tonight?” I watch him, confused from where his anger is coming from.

  “You didn’t like it when I lied, so I thought...” I trail off as Gavin closes the distance between us then leans down to my ear.

  “I wasn’t mad that you gave a fake name to a guy you thought was hitting on you. I was pissed for a whole other reason.” Our bodies are as close as you can get and I swear I can feel him growing against my leg. I’m so intoxicated by the smell and feel of him that I almost didn’t notice he was kissing his way down my neck. “God, you smell fucking fantastic.” I turn my neck as his lips continue their path to my shoulder.

  “Gavin! We need to shut this place the fuck down.”

  Kiran’s words break the spell that we were under and everyone, including Gavin, breaks for the two remaining doors. “Let’s go.” Gavin leads us the way we came and Kiran goes the other way. And less than two minutes later, they have the place locked up and Gavin is racing us toward Leeta’s.

  Gavin drives us home without saying a word, and he wore a scowl on his face the whole way. I’m expecting him to ignore me, and the hot way his mouth was kissing down my neck at The Hill, which is why when we walk inside I’m suddenly nervous about how I should act. We didn’t label tonight a date but that’s exactly what it felt like.

  “I had a good time. Thank you for asking me to go with you,” I mumble out at the bottom of Leeta’s stairs.

  When I finally gain the courage to look up I find his eager eyes eating me up. Gavin closes the distance between us and places a hand on my chin then without saying a word he lowers his mouth to mine. His lips are soft and silky and our kiss starts off slow but it turns hot within seconds. Gavin’s tongue moves with mine, setting my whole body on fire. My fingers start digging into his biceps then all to soon he pulls away and after a quick grin, he turns and walks up the steps toward his room without even saying goodnight.

  My heart feels like it might beat out of my chest, and I can’t stop the goofy smile that’s plastered on my face as my feet finally start moving me toward my own room.

  Tonight felt wild. I didn’t think I was cut out for bad boys, but I think I might be cut out for Gavin Loman.

  Saturday night Gavin gave me the best freaking kiss of my life. I dreamed about it. I woke up thinking about it, which is not at all like me. I wasn’t sure where this left the two of us, but when I woke up Sunday morning I found a note pushed under my door telling me something came up that he had to take care of. For some reason I expected to see him later that day, maybe even that night, but I never did.

  Leeta and I finally made the trip across the bay and the two of us spent hours shopping for clothing I’m positive I’ll never wear. Leeta loved everything I tried on and insisted I buy it and I didn’t care enough to argue.

  The whole time we were together all I wanted to do was to ask her if she knew where Gavin went or if she had any idea when he would return, but I chose not to. I’m not sure who’s to blame for their relationship being what it is, but it’s clear they both don’t think much of each other.

  When Gavin kissed me Saturday night, my body reacted in a way that’s completely foreign to me. My heart was racing, my body was tingling, and I was desperate for him to do more than just kiss me. The second he removed his lips from mine I was hoping the night we shared was the start of something. What I didn’t count on was Gavin up and disappearing, which is precisely what happened because I haven’t seen him in four days. His note said something came up, and I’ve imagined everything possible that would have kept him from at least stopping by, yet I keep coming up empty.

  Leeta’s enthusiastic personality has fully returned now that Gavin appears to be gone. The two of us have dinner together every night and she’s already pushing for us to have more girl time—aka another shopping trip—this weekend.

  I like Leeta, but I don’t like how comfortable she’s become with my role in her life. She can say whatever she wants, but she’s viewing me as her daughter and that thought has me debating the idea of moving out. I’m grateful for her help, but maybe it’s time for me to finally act like an adult. I can still go out to dinner with her. Heck, I’ll even give her a random shopping trip but I don’t want or need her to be my mother.

  I exhale a loud breath as I take a long hard look around the amazing room she’s allowed me to stay in. This is any normal twenty-year-olds dream room, but unfortunately it’s not mine. Sometimes less is better, my mother used to say all the time. I don’t think Leeta understands what the word less means.

  I need to clear my head. Thoughts of Leeta and Gavin and even my parents are overwhelming my every thought. Therefore, I do the only thing I know will help: run.

  I put on my usual gear and head down stairs where I find Leeta, who appears to be waiting on me.

  “Sweetheart, I’m having a very dear friend over for dinner. He’s the CEO of a fortune five hundred company that’s located in San Francisco and I’d love for you to meet him.” I shake my head to clear my thoughts. I need to get out of here. I need to run.

  “Sorry, Leeta,” I rush out. “I’m on my way out for a long run, but I appreciate the offer.” I need to take a step back if I want to get my point across to Leeta that we’re friends and nothing more.

  “No, I insist. Eat with us. You’re family now.” There’s desperation in her voice. All I know is that Leeta is becoming far too attached. I probably should find my own place to live before she starts introducing me as her daughter.

  “Sorry, Leeta. My running time has really been cut since I moved out here.” Her face falls slightly, but she recovers with a smile.

  “No, I understand. Maybe Ron will still be here when you get back.” I turn to leave when I finally find the courage to ask what I’ve been dying to ask her all week.

  “Leeta, I haven’t seen Gavin all week. Do you know where he went?”

  Leeta’s eyes scrunch with a hateful look when she hears Gavin’s name pass my lips. “He doesn’t actually live here. I’m guessing he had a fight with Carly and he needed a place to crash. I swear those two fight like cats and dogs, but for whatever reason they always end up making up.” Leeta rolls her eyes as she continues. “He claims to hate me, but whenever they’re fighting he always ends up back here.”

  “Oh,” I say while I push down the lump in my throat. I’m not stupid. Gavin said he was twenty-four and he’s drop dead gorgeous. Of course he has ex-girlfriends...probably a lot of them. Carly, however, doesn’t sound like an ex. She sounds like a current girlfriend. And he kissed me.

  Without thinking, I blurt out a quick goodbye and head out the door. As my feet hit the pavement my eyes start to water. I can’t believe he has a girlfriend. He kissed me...and he has a girlfriend. A few months ago my life was normal, almost on the verge of boring and I want that back. I don’t want to be in the middle of whatever game Leeta and Gavin are playing.

  They both openly dislike, maybe even hate each other, and they both seem to want to befriend me. But why?

  I run for hours and by the time I return to the Lomans’ house, I officially decide I’m moving out. I’m twenty and I’ve never lived on my own. Now that my parents are gone I need to start depending on myself for a change.

  Unless Leeta’s guest is staying over, I’m sure he’s long gone by now. But to ensure I avoid anyone, I slide in through the kitchen door, using my code to bypass the alarm. I’ve barely had time to grab a bottle of water when I hear Gavin’s angry voice. “Where the fuck have you been?”

  I flinch at his harsh tone, but I’m done. No more games for me. “Out.”

  “At this time of night? Who were you with?”

  I huff out a fake laugh. I haven’t seen him since Saturday night and suddenly he thinks he has the right to know where I’ve been? “I don’t owe you an explanation, just like you clearly didn’t owe me one when you disappeared for four days.”

  I shrug, trying to play off what happened between us Sat
urday night as nothing, but I’m not a very good actress. “Did you not get my note? I had something I had to take care of.” His jaw is tense while he continues to closely watch me.

  I don’t say anything and after several long moments of silence I exhale loudly. With my water in my hand, I walk around him and head up to my room.

  I walk into my room and push the door shut, but Gavin somehow makes it in before it closes. He is standing only a few feet away and I can tell he’s angry. His chest rises with every breath he takes while his eyes remain on mine. “What now?”

  “I didn’t think I’d be gone as long as I was. I also didn’t think I’d come back to this attitude. Kate, I didn’t have your cell phone, and I wasn’t about to call Leeta and ask for it.”

  I narrow my eyes in disbelief. He thinks I’m pissed because he didn’t call me. “Are you done? Because if you are then I think it’s time for you to go.”

  He curses under his breath. “What’s wrong?” Gavin presses his lips together while he waits for my answer.

  I shrug. “I grew up with parents who sheltered me from the world, but they also taught me what I’m worth. And I know I’m worth more than a guy who’ll kiss me then head home to his girlfriend.”

  Gavin’s jaw ticks and his eyes flash with anger. Any patience he once had is gone. “That’s what you think?” I glare back at him, secretly begging him to deny it, but instead he shakes his head at me like I’m the one who did something wrong.

  “Leeta told you I left to be with someone else?” He sighs in frustration.

  “I told you, she hates me and you shouldn’t trust anything she says. But it doesn’t matter...I was convicted in your mind long before you walked through that door tonight. Maybe instead of accusing me you should have asked me where I’ve been.”

  My heart is thumping and my hands are shaking. I didn’t ask and he didn’t deny. So why do I have an overwhelming feeling I just messed up my chance with Gavin?

  His eyes continue to watch me closely until he shakes his head one last time before walking out of my room.

  Something about this last week doesn’t add up. Phone or no phone he could have stopped by to talk to me, and he didn’t. He delivered the best kiss of my life and then disappeared. Maybe in hindsight I should have asked him what he was doing, but I’m certain I wouldn’t have liked the answer.

  ****

  I skipped classes today while I searched for a new place to live. I looked at over ten different apartments and finally settled on one step up from a total shit hole that still cost more per month than renting a place in the nicest suburb in Littleton. The biggest perk, maybe even the only perk, is it’s less than a mile away from campus.

  As soon as I signed my lease, I returned to Leeta’s to pack up my stuff and I lucked out. Nobody was home. I packed everything as fast as I could and took the chicken shit way out. I left her a thank you card but I promised we’d go to lunch this weekend.

  Guilt settles in as I drive away from the Lomans’ and toward my new home. I ran away from the only person who’s treated me with kindness since my father passed away. And I didn’t even say thank you—at least not in person. This is for the best, Kate. At least that’s what I keep reminding myself.

  I arrive to my apartment in time to let the deliveryman in with my furniture. Hours later, I’m sitting in my small and very messy apartment. Somehow, even with the guilt for how I treated Leeta, I feel like I did the right thing. Living on my own is a push I didn’t even know I needed.

  The next few days pass in peace. Leeta ends up taking me out to lunch where she all but begged me to return home. Home. I didn’t have the heart to tell her that my home is back in Colorado. Instead, I told her close to a thousand times that I need to learn how to take care of myself, and living on my own is exactly how I plan to accomplish that.

  The following week goes by with only a few calls from Leeta, but I don’t hear a word from Gavin. And while I’m not surprised, I am a little disappointed.

  Outside of Alyssa hanging out at my place non-stop, my life has been normal, almost boring. We study, pig out on junk food, and watch endless amounts of mindless television, which are all things I missed out doing in high school.

  Tonight is my second Friday, but only my eighth day in my apartment, and I’m finally sick of walking around boxes. I passed on going out with Alyssa and Gabby in order to stay home and put everything away, which wasn’t a hard decision.

  I open a box, a box I remember packing, and right on the top is an envelope that reads “Kate” and nothing else. I take a step back as my heart drops to my stomach and nerves take over. I glance around my apartment, but nothing looks out of place...but that’s not true. Nothing has an actual place yet, but I know I didn’t pack this envelope.

  I square my shoulders and take a deep breath, faking the confidence I need to open the damn thing. I pick it up slowly like I’m almost afraid it might actually jump out and bite me. The envelope isn’t sealed. Inside is a white card. I push back my fear and open the card and instantly acid forms in my stomach.

  The inside is written “Beneath the lies are emerald eyes.” Nothing else. I drop the card as my heart starts pounding against my chest. Again, my eyes scan the room looking for anything else that might be out of place, but I come up empty. I know I’m the emerald eyes. I’ve been told I have emerald eyes since before I knew that an emerald was green, but I have no idea why someone went to this degree to scare me.

  I take a small step toward the card at the exact same time someone knocks on my door, causing me to scream like I’m auditioning for a horror film. Only moments ago I felt safe here, but now...now I’m on edge and I still can’t figure out why someone would want to frighten me.

  “Kate?” I hear Alyssa scream my name from the other side of my door. “What’s going on? Are you okay?” I inhale a deep, calming breath of air and open the door with what I hope is a convincing smile on my face.

  “What the hell, Kate?”

  “What?” I shrug like nothing is wrong.

  Alyssa is looking at me with a strange expression on her face. “I heard you scream. What’s wrong? You’re acting funny.” I continue to smile as I turn and walk into my kitchen in hopes she doesn’t see the fear that’s still lingering in my system. If I tell her someone has been in my apartment and left me a note trying to scare me, she’ll freak and insist that I go back to her parents’ house with her. At least, that’s what I would do if the roles were reversed and I don’t have any plans of leaving.

  “Nothing is going on. I wasn’t expecting anyone to stop by and when you knocked, it scared me. Sorry.” I shrug my shoulders again, waiting for her response.

  She watches me closely before glancing around my apartment to ensure I’m alone, like she doesn’t believe me, but finally she lets it go. “Kyler just sent me a text that there’s a fight happening tonight at The Hill. I stopped by to make sure you get your butt up and go with me. Seriously, Kate, you’re twenty and it’s a Friday night and your idea of a good time is to sit home by yourself and do nothing,” she adds while shaking her head at me.

  She’s right and twenty minutes ago, I would have said hell no, especially about going to The Hill, but now...now I’m scared and getting out of my apartment sounds like a great idea. Seeing Gavin isn’t high on my list but the two times I’ve been to a fight they’ve been packed so maybe I won’t run into him.

  “Give me a few minutes and I’ll be ready,” I say as I’m already turning to head to my bedroom.

  “Okay, be fast. At the rate we’re going we’ll be lucky to get there before the fight starts.”

  I run a brush through my hair and put on a pair of jean shorts with a t-shirt. I’ll admit the shirt is slightly tighter than I’d normally wear—something I purchased when I was out with Leeta—but I refuse to look like crap when there’s a chance I might see Gavin.

  “Shit, girl. You know how to rock a t-shirt and shorts better than anyone I know.” A shy smile forms on my lips. I�
��m still adjusting to Alyssa’s straightforward, tell-it-like-it-is attitude.

  I grab my keys and follow Alyssa to her car where she drives like a woman on a mission. We make it to The Hill in less than ten minutes. Once again, we’re greeted by the same shady guy from the first time I was here.

  “Well, well. Lookie who’s back.” I smile to myself when I glance in his direction and see that he’s talking to Alyssa...and not me.

  “Yep, I’m back. This time maybe we should exchange numbers.” Instead of answering her, he grabs her phone out of her hand, punches a few numbers in then his pocket is ringing.

  “Now you have it, beautiful. Don’t forget to use it.” He licks his lips while his eyes continue to eat up every inch of Alyssa.

  The guy is not ugly by any means. He’s huge and has several scars on his face that does nothing to take away from his looks. Instead, he wears a mean look that sends a panic through me. Then again, that’s probably why he’s Gavin’s front man.

  “Will do, big boy.”

  Alyssa grabs my arm and leads us to the main room where guys are already being announced to fight. The room is packed full of people and already extremely loud. The bets are closed, but that’s not why Alyssa came. She’s looking to land a man—at least for one night.

  I naturally start to head up the bleachers, looking for safety, but Alyssa isn’t budging.

  “I didn’t come to sit on the bleachers, Kate,” she shouts into my ear. With another tug on my arm, we turn and make our way around groups of men until Alyssa finally settles in one place. I don’t want to watch another brutal fight, but even without that thought my eyes naturally go to the two chairs that Gavin and I sat in the last time I was here. And like I was expecting, he’s there watching the fighters. Tonight it’s Kiran sitting next to him, but my eyes remain focused on Gavin. He’s in his usual attire, but the stubble on his chin is more pronounced than I remember.

  His finger rubs back and forth over his cheek as Kiran leans in and says something in his ear, causing his attention to leave the ring. He’s scanning the people around him, but he’s not looking in my direction. Gavin’s eyes narrow as their private conversation continues. I shouldn’t want to know what they’re saying, but I do.