Maybe This Christmas

by Jennifer Snow

  She resisted the urge to go out there, knowing there was nothing she could say to change Jess’s mind and knowing there was nothing Jess could say to change hers.

  And a moment later, she heard the front door slam.

  Chapter 14

  Oh my God, this place is amazing,” Emma said, admiring the luxury five-star accommodations of the Chateau Royale Lodge. The four-poster king-sized bed in the center of the room looked warm and inviting with its dark brown fleece duvet and oversized pillows, a direct contrast to the cold, snowy mountain peaks visible through the open curtains at the window. The interior, with its light mocha-colored walls and hardwood flooring, the stonework fireplace in the corner, and the four-person Jacuzzi tub, helped Emma forget about her argument with her sister and any reservations she’d had about coming.

  After Asher had picked her up, her anxiety had increased as they’d made their way onto the highway and he’d taken the exit heading toward the mountains, but it had eased bit by bit as they’d traveled beyond the main lodge area, past the main slopes, and continued driving until they’d reached a secluded little valley, surrounded by the mountains, away from the ski and snowboarding competitions in Breckenridge.

  The entire drive, signs and advertisements for the Winter Tour displayed everywhere had toyed with her emotions as memories resurfaced, but here, away from it all, she relaxed.

  “It’s pretty impressive. Their website barely did it justice,” Asher said, opening the floor-to-ceiling curtains to the patio doors.

  Emma gasped. Outside on their large private deck was a hot tub already filled with bubbling water, steam escaping and swirling as it tangled with the cold air. White Christmas lights hung above and a small evergreen tree sat decorated in the corner of the deck, near a small two-seater table. A bottle of wine sat in an ice bucket and two wine glasses were perched on the edge of the tub.

  Any lingering hesitation she’d had about being in the mountains with him that weekend vanished. “Did you arrange this?” she asked, wrapping her arms around his waist.

  He laughed as he turned in her arms and kissed her. “I’ll pretend I did.”

  Taking her hand, he walked toward the bed and picked up a white terrycloth robe draped across it. “Shall we take advantage of whoever did?”

  She nodded, already removing her cardigan. That hot tub looked like it could solve all of life’s problems, and it would certainly help to melt away the stress of her morning.

  Asher walked toward her, his eyes taking in her body. She knew the body-hugging tank top with lace at the top was his kryptonite. He practically drooled each time she wore it. The simple white cotton fabric clinging to her braless breasts and the hint of sexy with the lace was her favorite combination as well. It somehow made her feel confident, though it was more likely Asher’s reaction to the sight that did it. “Remind me to leave a really big tip for whoever it was,” he said, grabbing her waist and pulling her into him.

  After another week of therapy sessions only, he hadn’t kept his hands off of her from the moment he’d picked her up in his rented SUV. And she hadn’t minded one little bit. Holding his hand as he drove through the beautiful rugged landscape on the way up the mountain had felt so right.

  She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her body into him now. He smelled so good, like the outdoor mountain air combined with a soft masculine aftershave, and her body immediately responded to the kisses he was placing at the base of her neck. “Mmmm,” she said, standing on tiptoes and taking his face in her hands to kiss him.

  His lips were demanding as they met hers, and his hands gripped her tighter. She closed her eyes, savoring the taste of him…

  But he abruptly released her and moved away. “Nope. This was not the point. Get dressed. Let’s go to dinner.”

  She frowned. Dinner? Who gave a shit about food when they had this amazingly romantic setup right here in the room? “I thought we were doing the hot tub?” She moved closer again and reached for the button on his jeans.

  He stopped her hand and took several steps away from her. “Don’t make it harder. My resolve is weakening by the second.” He ran a hand through his hair, before placing both on his hips and forcing a breath. “But I promised you more than just sex, and if we get in that tub…”

  He looked to be struggling with each word, contradicting what she knew he really wanted to do. She walked toward him, unbuttoning her jeans as she went. Stopping an inch from him, she wiggled free of the denim and stepped out. The desire in his eyes as he stared at her in only the tank top and a pale pink silk thong made it clear that she would be getting her way.

  Still, he protested. Weakly. “Emma, I’m serious. I want to do this right.”

  She wrapped her arms around his neck and immediately his went around her. “And I want hot tub, Champagne, and room service…later,” she whispered against his lips. “Much later.”

  * * *

  So much for good intentions.

  No one could say he hadn’t tried. But it would take a much stronger man than him to continue saying no to Emma when she was shimmying out of her thong and lifting her tank top over her head. Standing right in front of him naked, looking so beautifully tempting and impossible to argue with. On the way to the mountains, she’d seemed a little nervous, on edge, but now she was completely relaxed and killing him with her insistence. “Are you sure?” One last half-hearted attempt to clear any residual guilt on his conscience for diving right into sex when they were supposed to be deepening their relationship in other ways. This was her idea. He’d made a valiant effort.

  “Take your clothes off, Asher.”

  Unlike his sister’s and future sister-in-laws’, Emma’s kind of bossy he could handle.

  Removing his sweater and T-shirt together, he tossed them onto a chair near the window. Unzipping and unbuttoning his jeans, he dropped them to the floor, feeling only the slightest bit bad about messing up the gorgeous room. Picking up one of the robes again, he held it open for her.

  She stopped in front of him and turned slowly. His gaze slid the length of her sexy back, down her thin waist to her round, perfect little ass, and it took every ounce of strength not to toss the robe aside and bend her over the big, inviting plush duvet on the king-sized bed.

  The intensity of his insatiable want for her always surprised him. In every other relationship he knew of, the passion and sparks faded over time. He knew some of the married men on his team longed to be single whenever they were on the road. Hookups were common, and they always said they were envious of the single guys who could have a different woman in every city they visited. Ash never had that desire. The fire between him and Emma only blazed even more each time he was with her.

  When they’d first started having sex, it had been slightly awkward, neither of them knowing where the other really stood, but once they’d established things for what they were, they were free to be together, to enjoy one another without the limitations of labels and overanalyzing things. No strings or complications. Just mutual trust and respect and an unyielding need to be close to one another.

  And damn if he didn’t want her right now as much as he had the first time.

  The longest, and arguably, most meaningful, relationship for both of them had been a nonrelationship.

  His gut twisted slightly. He hoped this new attempt to turn what they had into something more didn’t destroy everything.

  “Asher, I’m getting a little cold,” she said.

  “Sorry. I was enjoying the view.” He wrapped the robe around her shoulders and, taking the belt, reached around her waist to tie it. The smell of her peppermint body lotion making him want to lick her skin. Christmas had never been a reason to celebrate for him—being away from home, without someone to fully enjoy it with—but this year, he was enjoying every scent, taste, and sight the holidays had to offer…on Emma.

  She turned and handed him a robe and he put it on quickly, but not before her gaze caught sight of his semi hard-on and she
grinned.

  “Your fault. I was cool with going to dinner,” he said.

  “Tell that to your penis,” she said with a laugh, then ducked out of reach as he went to grab her.

  “You’re going to get it,” he growled, sliding his feet into a pair of resort slippers and following her to the door.

  “I hope so,” she said with that wicked little grin of hers that drove him wild. Who had he been kidding to think he could resist her long enough to eat? There was only one thing he was hungry for.

  Opening the patio doors, Emma shivered as the cold mountain wind blew mini snowdrifts inside the room. “It’s so cold.” She hesitated as she slid her feet into the other pair of slippers at the door.

  “It’s going to feel amazing once you’re in there,” Asher said, stepping outside. “Come on.” Taking her hand, he led the way to the edge of the tub. Steam rose in misty spirals from the water. He removed his robe quickly, climbed the three steps, and lowered himself into the water. The contrast of hot and cold awakened every inch of his skin.

  Sitting along the side bench, his shoulders the only thing above the water, he watched as Emma removed her robe at the top of the stairs and hurried in. Too soon her too perfect body was immersed beneath the hot water and steam blocked his view of her face for a second as she moved closer. “Ahhhh, you were right. This is amazing.”

  He reached for her and pulled her to cradle his lap, taking her legs and placing them on either side of his. His fingers massaged the muscles there, sliding higher to where her legs joined her hips and squeezing not so gently.

  He was so fucking hard already. “So you’re completely sure that it’s okay that we do this date out of order?” he asked.

  She wrapped her arms around his neck and slid her body farther onto his lap, pressing her pelvis against his erection. “You have me naked, so I’m pretty sure this ‘date’ idea of yours has evaporated.”

  He slid his hands up her waist, holding her in place, his grip tight on her rib cage. “I’m sorry…you’re too sexy.”

  She laughed. “You just haven’t had any in a week.”

  Since the night of their first date—the award ceremony. The night everything seemed to change. So far, for the better…but he was still nervous as shit that they were destroying a good thing. “Is that what you think? That I want you just because I’m sexually deprived?”

  She nodded, running her wet hands through her short hair, slicking it back away from her face. “Yes.”

  He lowered his lips to her collarbone, placing gentle little kisses there. “So you think I’m a sex addict?”

  “I think we both are,” she said, massaging his shoulders as she rocked her body slowly back and forth over his thickening length.

  “You might be, but I’d have to be having a lot more sex to qualify,” he murmured against her neck, just below her ear. He slowed her motions even more. He was already too close to the edge and he wanted this to last. Surrounded by the mountains, breathing in the fresh, cold air with the contradicting heat of the water warming him, made for an intoxicatingly arousing setting.

  “What are you saying? That you save yourself for me?” she asked, sliding a hand beneath the water and gripping him. Her gaze was full of teasing and torment, but he had news for her.

  “Yes.”

  Her mouth gaped slightly and she studied him, looking unsure whether or not to believe him.

  “It’s true.” He tucked several strands of wet hair behind her ear and let his fingers trail along her cheek. “The only person I’ve been with in a very long time…” Almost six years in fact. “Is you.”

  “But you could have any woman you want, any night of the week.” Her surprise was evident in her voice.

  He didn’t know about that, but he couldn’t deny that women were all over him whenever he traveled with the team. But since his friendship with Emma had turned into a benefits situation, he hadn’t been able to bring himself to go there with another woman. He’d never told Emma before because it was his own decision, and he didn’t want her to feel as though she had to adopt that choice for herself. They’d been very clear from the start that they were far from exclusive to one another, but…“I don’t want just any woman, any day of the week,” he said, his lips meeting hers before he could say any more, before he gave in to the seduction of the winter paradise all around him.

  * * *

  Emma’s mind was racing at the same speed as her pulse. Asher wasn’t sleeping with anyone when he traveled with the team? She’d always just assumed…never asking for fear of the answer. She tried to remember the last time he’d mentioned anyone he was dating. No one recent came to mind. The last few times there had been someone in the picture to interrupt what they had, it had been on her side. Men she’d casually dated. But even those had been more than a year ago, a last-ditch attempt to try to find someone who made her feel even half of what Asher did.

  Her heart thundered in her chest as she kissed him, their lips moving in sync, fast and hard. Air didn’t matter. Kissing him was all that mattered. And touching him. Her grip tightened on his shoulders, and her pace quickened as she tried to turn off her head and not read too much into his revelation.

  Asher put hockey first. Before everything. Maybe sex fell to the bottom of his priority list as well…until they were together.

  I don’t want just any woman…

  Did she dare hope that things were really starting to change? Had their extended time together helped him see, helped him realize something? Was this attempt at a date really a sincere gesture to let her know that they could be something more? That he was ready? She’d had her doubts, thinking his recent actions were out of a desperation as he’d felt her slipping away slightly. Of course it had only been in his mind. Despite her consideration to pursue her doctorate, she was only more invested in him as time went on. Nothing would have changed that. Nothing could ever change that.

  But maybe it was more than desperation fueling his interest in the possibility of a new form of relationship.

  Her conflicted mind was torture.

  Just stop thinking and enjoy this.

  She fought for a breath and pushed all thoughts away as she savored the taste of him, enjoying the feel of his mouth against hers, the cool flesh at his neck and shoulders against her hot skin. She was in a mountain paradise getaway with the man she loved, that was all that mattered.

  He lifted her and a second later he was sliding into her body. Her breath caught at the surprise, then she moaned as her forehead fell forward onto his. The pleasurable sensation of having him inside of her outweighed any pain from the tightness of his full erection plunging deep. Her fingernails dug into the flesh at his shoulders as he continued to guide her body up and down the length of him.

  “Damn, Asher, I can’t get enough of you.”

  Moving slowly, he stood, lifting her slightly out of the water. The cold air hitting her breasts and stomach made her gasp, before he quickly switched position with her and eased her back down into the water. “Spread your arms out against the edge,” he said, bending to his knees in front of her.

  She did and he lifted her ass up until she was floating in the tub, her body supported by her arms out along the edge and his hands gripping her ass cheeks. Positioned in front of a powerful jet, the bubbles circulated below her, tickling her most intimate areas, creating an even more intense sensation as Asher reentered her.

  The floating weightlessness allowed her to tilt her pelvis in various ways and intensified the friction between them. She rested her head back against the edge of the tub. He rocked her hips up and down over him as he continued his own rocking motion in rhythm with hers.

  It felt so amazing. The cool breeze on her flushed cheeks, the hot water circling all around them, her nipples rising and falling out of the water, teasing her body with the alternating hot and cold…Asher’s full length inside of her…

  He paused and she opened her eyes to look at him.

  His brow was f
urrowed and he looked pained.

  “You okay?” she asked.

  He nodded. “My knee, that’s all.”

  She immediately slid back down toward the seat, allowing him to slide out of her.

  “No, don’t, its fine,” he said, but she shook her head.

  “No way. This feels too good for you not to enjoy it, too.”

  His breathing was as labored as hers as he stood. “Bed?”

  She nodded. Taking his hand, she climbed out of the hot tub behind him, and instead of reaching for his robe, he grabbed hers, wrapping her quickly in it before lifting her into his arms.

  She stared into his eyes and touched his cheek. “I love you, Ash.” At first she wasn’t sure if she’d said the words or only thought them, but his grip on her tightened and his gaze was full of so much she couldn’t quite understand as he carried her inside and set her down on the bed.

  He stared at her a second longer, before his body and his lips made contact with hers and he continued to make love to her.

  The intensity of his passion as he brought her immediately to orgasm was almost enough for her to overlook the fact that he hadn’t said the words back.

  * * *

  Exercise used to be his fix for anything. But forty laps in the resort’s pool at four a.m. wasn’t solving anything.

  To say Emma’s words had come as a surprise wouldn’t be entirely true. Asher had felt it from her the last few weeks especially, and he knew she’d expected more from him than silence to her confession of love. Unfortunately anything he’d tried to say had gotten stuck on his tongue.

  He’d been the one to suggest a real date to see if their friendship could be more than just comfortable, dependable, full-of-amazing nights together, and now he was confused and conflicted.

  Were these new feelings for her real or simply the fear of losing her?