“I’m a dead man.”
“Yeah.” She snickered and patted him on the back as she walked by him. “But I’m turned on.” She let out a dramatic ‘whew’ then stopped. “Hey, wait, does that make me a pre-necrophiliac?”
“Ellen.” He shook his head at her school-girl type giggling. “Work.”
“No.” Ellen darted to the tape player and pressed the button. “Journey.”
Dean grunted.
^^^^
The last time Henry was so excited about something new happening in Beginnings was when Josephine reinvented the ‘Chocolate Kiss’. He remembered how he just ate and ate those new candies until he got sick, and eventually aggravated a cavity he didn’t know he had. He didn’t mind the cavity. He did mind getting scolded at by Dean, who like Andrea, was not only a doctor but the dentist as well. Henry still insisted Dean pulled that tooth on purpose just so teach Henry a lesson in gluttony. But that was another subject and Henry couldn’t believe he allowed his mind to travel to it.
The wireless was done. Ready to go. A part of him wished it was survivor straggler season just so Frank could get to use the headset in one of his runs to divert trouble. But that would eventually happen. At that moment, Henry just wanted to test the system, and he did, at the same time for everyone.
Continuously talking was never a problem for Henry. He did so into his own radio headset, from the fields to the underdeveloped living section. Rehashing stories of his youth and the uncle that used to pay Henry to pick his toes. He thought he was entertaining until everyone started telling him to shut up. But Henry had more range testing to do. So Henry began to sing. He was glad he saved the singing for last, because the last place he had to check were the tunnels under Beginnings. Not only did they span such a distance that Henry was able to capture all the top hits of the seventies and eighties, the tunnels also added that echoing effect that made Henry sound--at least he thought--like a singing sensation.
But being in the tunnels did one other thing. They made Henry . . . stop.
^^^^
“It’s Christmas Eve, Dean.” Ellen said as she walked around her desk at containment. “Don’t you want to go home early, too?”
“Yeah, I will, eventually. Josephine is baking with the twins. So no hurry.”
“Doesn’t that give you like a frightening Hansel and Gretel feel? She eighty some and really . . .”
“El, be nice. O.K. listen.” Dean laid a stack of papers before her. “What would you say about . . . now no animal rights comments.”
“Not from me.”
“What would you say about removing the immunity strand of DNA from . . .”
The sound of marching boots made both Dean and Ellen look to the door. It sounded like a military protocol moving in.
“Dean.” Ellen slowly moved from her desk. “They wouldn’t without telling me, would they?” No more than two steps to the door, Ellen saw Frank and three of his security men move steady right down the hall. “They would. Shit.” She raced from the office.
“Ellen.” Dean tried to chase her.
“Frank!” Ellen screamed running to the skills room. “Don’t you . . .”
The frightened scream of Max bellowed out and so did he, straight from the skills room at top speed, knocking into Ellen and sending her flying back in his mad dash of an escape.
Ellen felt the hall spinning as she found herself on the floor looking up to Frank.
“You O.K.?” he extended his hand.
Ellen smacked it way. “Don’t you take Max.”
Waving her off, Frank walked by her up the hall where Max diligently pounded on the steel security door as if someone would open it for him. “Secure that man!” Frank ordered his men. “Let’s get him out of here.”
If Ellen could scream, she would have, but she stayed on the floor, still in a stunned state following her fall.
“El.” Dean bent down to her. “Are you all right.”
“Yeah.” She closed her eyes sadly.
“Come on.” Dean helped her up. “Are you sure you . . .”
“I’m fine.” Ellen walked to her office. “I can’t believe they took him.”
“That’s not important right now. You need to sit.” Dean walked in behind her. “You took a hell of a fall and that’s not good for . . .”
“I’m fine.” Ellen’s hands lay on her desk and she dropped her head.
Moving to behind her, Dean placed his hands on Ellen’s shoulders in a soothing rubbing manner. He spoke soft. “He was given a lot of chances. He’s just . . . he’s wild El. No matter what you do, you can’t change them all. Understand?”
“Dean!” Frank blasted his voice in the office. “Get your hands off my wife.”
Dean lifted his hands and backed up. He swiped up the pile of folders from Ellen’s desk. “I’ll talk to you about this later.” He looked only once at Frank and then he left.
Ellen’s words were barely heard. “I thought you were taking him out.”
“Dan and Greg are.” Frank answered. “It had to be done. Your safety and those here are my concern.”
“I have to wonder about that.” Ellen looked up. “I’m stuck between wondering if you really are looking out for my best interest or if you’re punishing me. If I smile, you take it away. If I talk to you, you yell. It’s almost as if, you want me to hurt as bad as you do.”
“I do.”
“What?” Ellen gasped out.
“It’s not right. I don’t mean to. I just . . . you’re the closest person to me and it kills me to see you smile or be happy. Especially when I feel like this. And maybe El, maybe we were just wrong about it all. We may have been great friends forever.” Frank looked down. “We may have been great bed partners. But as a couple, we’re proving everyone’s point. It’s not meant to be. I can’t handle the trying to be a husband. Not now.” He moved to the door. “So I’m just gonna let you smile, and let you be happy. I’m going to walk away.”
And Frank did.
Ellen huffed out a breath of her pursuant exhaustion when she walked into the bedroom of her home. But Frank did not acknowledge that he heard her. On the bottom of the bed he sat staring down to his hands, and to something he played with between his fingers.
“Frank.” She whispered out stepping into the bedroom. “What are you doing?” She waited and didn’t get an answer. “Tell me . . .” she moved closer to the bed. “Tell me what you implied. Tell me that’s not what you want.”
“It’s not.” His voice was hoarse. “Trust me. There’s nothing more I want than to be with you forever. I even . . .” Rolled between his fingers, he blindly lifted a ring. Small, flat, different stones were pressed around it. “Was giving you my mother’s ring for Christmas. Since I can’t get you anything else.” Before Ellen could take it, he clenched it in his hand “But I’m not going to make you stay with me.”
“You aren’t making me do anything, Frank.” Ellen knelt before him trying to make eye contact that he avoided. “Yeah, sure, we’re gonna have our problems. We did when we lived together in college. But like then, we can’t quit. We spent too many years separate to let it fall apart when we finally have each other. My God, I know you better than I know myself.”
Emotionally Frank chuckled. “I doubt that.”
“Are you arguing the point with me? There is nothing about you I don’t know. Nothing. Try me. Ask me anything.”
A raise of his eyes finally made Frank look at Ellen. “Did you know . . . did you know I, not Miguel, was the one who shot Robbie?” Frank knew she tried to hide it, but he saw the flinch she made. “I killed him, my baby brother. I . . . I didn’t want anyone, no, I didn’t want you to know, because I knew what it would do to you. You wouldn’t see me the same way. I couldn’t live with that. But . . .” He let out a breath. “But I can’t live with this either. I saw what he did to you, to Dean, and I saw what he did to Denny, then I failed to see my brother and I pulled the trigger.”
“Oh, my God.” Ellen closed her eyes
.
“See.” Frank twitched his head, his faced tensed up painfully. “But I guess it’s better you know what and who you’re married to. A cold blooded killer.”
“I’m not saying, ‘Oh my God’ over what you did. I’m saying it because you have been carrying this alone. I can’t believe you didn’t come to me. How . . . how could you think I’d judge you? I love you. There is nothing, I repeat nothing that you could do to make me stop loving you. And as far as who you are . . .” Ellen stood up. “We all had to change, Frank. We all became people in this world that we didn’t want to be. Sometimes we won’t realize why, and sometimes it stares us in the face. You’re lucky. It’s obvious why you became the way you are. Lives Frank, many of them, depend on you. And you’re the only one in this entire community with enough guts to face anything. And I know what and who I’m married to. I’m glad you’re like that. Because I swear to God, if these walls crumble or I get lost outside of them, you. You are the only person I trust to keep me safe and bring me home.”
“But I take . . . I take so many lives.”
“You do what you have to do. You protect. And you just don’t take life . . . you give it.” From her back pocket, Ellen pulled a small black square and extended it down to Frank. “I could have told you sooner. But, I wanted it to be my present. Hold it up to the light, it’s the best we can do at the clinic. Merry Christmas.” Ellen waited until he took it, but still he didn’t look as if he cared. Giving up for the time being, she slowly turned and moved to the door. No sooner did she get to it, that she heard a shuffling sound, and Frank’s hand pummeled forward shutting the door and leaving, her facing it.
He moved behind her whispering in her ear. “Tell me this is true. Please.”
“It’s true. And it’s your son, Frank. We’re having that baby. Tell me you’re not giving up on us.”
Frank closed his eyes and gasped out near silently before turning Ellen to face him. Eyes still tightly shut, fingers gripping the bad ultrasound picture, Frank instinctively felt his hands up Ellen’s arms to her face. And the deep heavy breath he released precluded the kiss he delivered at that moment that said more than any words ever could.
^^^^
Joe was in the middle of getting dinner ready, but stopped to answer the door because it was his community obligation as leader, not because he wanted to.
“Joe.” So frazzled, Andrea stepped inside his home.
“Hello to you, too.” Joe closed the door.
“We have a problem.” Andrea stated.
“What’s wrong?”
“Oh.” Emotionally, Andrea wrung her hands. “He never showed up for dinner. I know he’s alone. He said he’d be there. He never showed up. I haven’t heard or seen from him since before noon. Where is he? Oh, Sweet Jesus, what if he’s dead?”
“I know this may sound cold, Andrea.” Joe laid his hands on her arms. “But he’s been in a strange mood.”
“I know.”
“You don’t think he . . . he . . . killed himself, do you?”
Andrea gasped loudly. “Oh, poor Henry, I hadn’t any idea he was so down.”
“Henry?” Joe stepped back shocked. “I thought you were talking about Miguel.”
“Miguel?” Andrea repeated the same shock. “Miguel’s next door, and what would make you think a Christian man like Miguel would take his own life.”
“Um . . .” Joe fluttered his flips. “Maybe the break up?” he shrugged. “You have been pretty cold to him late . . .”
“Joe!” Andrea scolded. “I don’t want to discuss my marital problems. I do, however want to discuss Henry. Where is he?”
Joe’s mouth opened and closed few times before he tossed his hands in the air. He had an idea where Henry was, and Joe would find him . . . after he finished making and eating his dinner.
^^^^
Dean complained about that tape player but he certainly was using it. Ellen could hear the Christmas music playing before she stepped into the lab. “Dean Michael Hayes.” She called out softly and walked in. “What are you doing?”
“Working on our virus.” Dean scurried about.
“It’s Christmas Eve. We’re doing dinner and stuff at Joe’s. I thought you would have stopped by.”
“It’s really not my place. Not this year.” Dean paused, then continued working.
“Must be on a brink or something, I can’t recall you ever, in the whole time in Beginnings, working this late on Christmas Eve.”
“That’s because I was never alone on Christmas Eve.”
Ellen closed her eyes. “Dean.”
“No.” He walked to her. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be a damper, especially with you letting the baby news out. I’m just feeling kind of down.”
“Do you wanna talk about it?”
“Do you want to listen?”
“Of course.” Ellen pulled up a seat at the same time as Dean and they both sat. “Talk.”
“It’s just that . . . this is the first Christmas here I don’t have you or the kids. And, the days.” He shook his head. “I always had you to talk to. Come home to. And I always, always wanted to have another baby with you.”
“I never knew you were serious about that.”
“Oh, yeah.” Dean nodded. “I love having a family. And a baby, my kids, they are things no one can take from me. Or steal away behind my back. Now everything I had or wanted, Frank has. Gees.” He cringed and leaned forward, kissing her on the cheek. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be like this. It’s the Christmas thing.” He breathed out. “Even with the commercialization of it gone, it’s still the one time of year you realize how lonely you really are.”
“Ah, Dean.” Ellen stood up. “You still have me to talk to. I’m here. I won’t let you be alone. And, we get along great finally.”
“I have news for you El, we always got along great. You just were too busy trying to deny it to see it.”
Slowly, Ellen walked behind Dean and wrapped her arm around him. “I did you wrong. I know. Please know I am so sorry for that.” She brought her lips close to his ear. “Shut down the lab for the night. Come on, go to services with us.”
“I will. They still aren’t for a few more hours. You go back to Joe’s. I’m going to work.”
Sliding her arm from him, Ellen moved to the door and stopped. “This . . . this may sound really strange. But I mean it with all sincerity. You helped me out more times than you needed to. After the plague, when I wanted to have a baby, and Frank refused, you fathered the twins. So. . When you Dean, want to have that baby . . . just come to me. I may not be able to help you now, but I’ll give that to you. I promise.”
Dean smiled. “I can’t ask that of you and I won’t.”
“O.K.” Ellen nodded. “But know, the offer will always stand. A repayment, a gesture of friendship. However you want to view it. It’s there.”
Mouthing the words ‘thank you’ Dean stood up. “I better finish up.”
“You’re really going to work some more?”
“Another hour or so.” Dean moved to the back counter. “I just started this batch and I want to . . .” He stopped when he heard the door shut. Thinking, ‘she left?’ Dean turned around to see Ellen grabbing her lab coat. “What are you doing?”
“I said I won’t let you be alone.” She moved to him. “And that means tonight. Besides, I hate having you work on this virus without me.” Ellen picked up a clipboard. “What if you cure it when I’m not here? You’ll take all the credit.”
“Hell yeah.” He laughed when Ellen gave her fake look of being offended. Dean smiled. “Merry Christmas, El.”
Ellen returned the smile. “Merry Christmas Dean.”
^^^^
Whistling? Footsteps?
Sitting on the ground of the tunnels, knees bent, notebook perched on his legs, Henry looked up to the sounds. “Oh, hey, Joe.” He said perky.
“Oh, hey Henry.” Joe walked to him. “I see you’re, uh, back at that wall again.”
>
“Yes.” Henry stood up excitedly. “I’m done with the wireless and figured, why not?”
“Why not.” Joe lifted his hand.
“So I was looking at it.” Henry held out his pen. “You know, the power lines and pipes. And I was trying to theorize where they went.”
“Of course. That’s just you.” Joe pacified.
“Yeah.” Henry grinned. “So I came up with a list of ideas.”
“I see.”
“I wrote them down.” He handed the notebook to Joe.
Calmly, Joe skimmed the list. “I see.”
“And I was also trying to come up with ways to take this wall down safely. You know, just in case it was a main sense of support I don’t want the community collapsing.”
“How thoughtful of you.”
So pleased, Henry nodded and looked back to the wall.
“I have something to say.” Joe hesitated then raised his voice slightly. “Eleven hours.”
“Huh?” Henry scratched his head.
“Eleven hours, Henry. You have been down here eleven hours staring at that goddamn wall. Eleven hours!”
“But Joe, I wasn’t just sitting down here, I was being productive. And if you just let me get behind that wall . . .”
“You aren’t tearing down the goddamn wall, Henry!” Joe yelled. “Get it out of your mind. It’s a wall. Simple. If you had a logical reason to do it, I would say go on. But you don’t.”
“I beg to differ, Joe. I have that list.”
Joe returned to being calm, but only for a second, after nodding one time, he lifted the notebook and with bodily dramatics, he whacked Henry upside of the head with it.
“Hey!”
“What the hell is the matter with you?”
“You hurt me.” Henry rubbed his head.
“So what!” Joe shoved the notebook to Henry. “Read your list, Henry. There is no Alien nest behind there. There isn’t a travel way to a secret society. It isn’t a time warp to a different dimension. It’s a wall. A simple wall. Leave it be. It is insane. Insane! People are going to move to have you ousted or tossed in containment if they find this shit out. Stop it. I can’t protect this behavior forever. Don’t let me catch you here again!” Shaking his head, and really having to get to church, Joe walked away.
The Big Ten: The First Ten Books of the Beginnings Series Page 85
