by Laura Farr
At 11:30 on the dot, I saw a truck pull into the drive and Alex hopped out. He raised his hand and waved, and I gave him a small wave back. Taking a deep breath, I headed down the steps to meet him.
“Hey Savannah,” Alex said, brushing a kiss across my cheek. “You look beautiful.”
“Thank you,” I replied quietly, embarrassed by his compliment.
“What did you do to your hand?” he asked, reaching down and taking my bandaged hand in his. “Will you be able to ride?”
I nodded, gently pulling my hand free of his. “I cut it when a window broke, and it looks worse than it is. I’ll be fine to ride.” I paused, watching as he nodded. There was no mistaking how gorgeous he was, and I could tell he was well built by the way his t-shirt pulled tight across his chest, his tanned arms bulging out of the sleeves. Despite acknowledging that he was good-looking, my stomach didn’t flip, and my heart didn’t race when I looked at him. There had only ever been one guy who had that effect on me, and I was guessing there would only ever be one guy who did. Pushing my feelings for Josh away, I focused my attention back on Alex. “Should we head out?”
“Yep, lead the way,” he said enthusiastically. I felt awful that I was leading him on. Even if I hadn’t been pregnant, I knew nothing would ever happen between us, not while I was still so hung up on Josh. “This place is incredible,” he exclaimed, looking around in awe. “Did you grow up here?”
“Yeah, my Grams and Grandpa ran the ranch, and my parents took over when they couldn’t manage anymore. Running this place is all my parents have ever known. They’ve changed it quite a bit since my grandparents died, but I really love it here.” We’d reached the stables and I pushed the door open with my good hand, relieved to see that Mason wasn’t around. “All the ranch horses are kept in here, and I keep Marley, my own horse, with them. I thought you could ride Titan, he’s the black horse in the end stall. I’ll just get the saddles.”
“Let me help you.”
“Okay thanks,” I replied, realizing I was going to struggle to saddle up the horses with only one hand. Thankfully Alex seemed to know what he was doing, and 15 minutes later I was sitting atop Marley, heading out past the guest accommodations with Alex riding next to me. I edged Marley into a slow trot, enjoying the warm breeze rushing around me. Alex looked confident on Titan and joined me in a trot. It was a beautiful fall day, and the sun was shining. The weather had been unusually warm for the time of year, and it was a perfect day for a ride. I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket, signaling a message, but I couldn’t stop to check it as my good hand was holding Marley’s reins. It would have to wait until I reached the lake and was able to dismount.
“So where are we heading then Savannah?” Alex asked after we’d ridden in silence for a few minutes.
“The Colorado River. It’s about a 45-minute ride, but it’s well worth it. It’s my favorite place on the ranch.”
“Sounds great,” he replied, smiling across at me. I gave him a small smile back as I felt my phone buzz in my pocket again.
We chatted comfortably as we rode, and I found out that Alex was quite a bit older than me at 28 and worked as a physical therapist at the hospital in Marble Falls. He asked me what I did and seemed surprised when I told him I was in college, getting a degree in business. “I thought you were around my age—you look older than 21,” he said.
I laughed, looking over at him. “I’m not sure whether to take that as a compliment or not.”
“You’re beautiful Savannah, it was definitely a compliment.” Feeling my face flush, I dropped my eyes from his, and we continued in a comfortable silence. I felt my phone vibrate with three more messages before it started to vibrate continually, indicating that someone was trying to call me. I knew from my surroundings that we were about 10 minutes from the river. Someone obviously needed to get in touch with me, and I needed to get there to check that everything was okay. I could have stopped and dismounted, but if I was being honest, I had struggled slightly to mount Marley with my bad hand, and I didn’t want to have to dismount and mount unnecessarily. I hadn’t wanted to ask Alex for any help back at the stables after telling him I would be fine to ride.
Finally reaching the river, I carefully dismounted Marley, being careful of my hand, and left him to graze in the shade of the trees. Alex did the same with Titan and we made our way to the water’s edge. Digging in my pocket with my good hand, I pulled out my phone and held it up. “Sorry, it was going crazy on the ride here, do you mind if I check it?” I asked Alex.
“Of course not, go for it.”
Squinting in the sunlight, I looked down at the display: four messages and a missed call, all from Josh. “Shit,” I mumbled under my breath. “What does he want?”
Josh: I just saw you go out on your horse—are you out of your mind?! Call me!
Josh: Savannah! Why aren’t you answering me?
Josh: If you don’t answer me I’m coming to find you!
Josh: I’m on my way!
“Savannah, you’ve gone pale, is everything okay?” Alex asked, concern lacing his voice.
“I just need to make a quick call, would you excuse me?” I asked him. Not waiting for a reply, I stepped away, heading back toward the horses in an attempt to hide my call from him. The last thing I needed was Josh showing up. He would know exactly where I was—we’d come to this spot as kids all the time and he knew I loved it there. I hit the call button and waited; it didn’t even ring, just went straight to voicemail. The signal out there was patchy and it was luck of the draw if your phone worked; Josh’s obviously didn’t. I ended the call and frantically typed him a message in the hope that he would get the text before he showed up.
Me: DON’T COME! I’m fine! I couldn’t answer when I was riding but I’m fine. I’ll catch up with you later.
I hit send and prayed he would get it in time and turn around. I rolled my eyes and groaned—looking at the time of his last message, he would probably be there in about 10 minutes if he rode quickly. Although Josh hadn’t grown up on a ranch like Brody and I had, he had spent most of his summers at ours since he was about 10 and was as good on a horse as Brody was. Josh lived in a huge house just outside of Marble Falls. His parents owned a construction company, and while he had a good relationship with them, they were never home much when he was growing up, spending all their time working. As soon as Josh had been old enough, he had spent most of his free time at our place, learning to ride and fish with Brody and me.
“Savannah,” Alex called from behind me. “Do we need to head back? Is everything okay?”
“No, no, everything is fine, just a misunderstanding,” I lied. “Do you feel like a dip?” I asked him in an attempt to change the subject. I wasn’t going to tell him Josh was potentially on his way, and I was still hopeful he would get my message in time.
“Sure,” he replied, slipping his boots off. I kicked off my boots too and slipped my toe into the water, squealing at how cold it was. I heard Alex laugh behind me and I turned, kicking some water up at him. He laughed again and eased in, standing next to me with his shoulder touching mine. “I can see why you like it here, it’s so quiet.”
I nodded as I looked around. It was my favorite place on the ranch and it never failed to amaze me; it was so beautiful and peaceful. I closed my eyes and dropped my head back. The water may have been cold, but the sun was warm on my face.
“We used to come here all the time when we were kids. We’d spend all day here, playing in the water, swimming, fishing. I loved it.”
“We?” he asked.
“My brother and…” I trailed off, not wanting to bring up Josh.
“Your brother’s friend?” he finished for me, saying what I couldn’t. I nodded and turned to face him.
“Look Alex, maybe this wasn’t—” He lowered his head and the next thing I knew, his lips were crashing into mine as he silenced me with a kiss.
“Savannah!” I heard an angry voice yell. I pulled away from Alex and spun
around to see Josh flying through the clearing on one of the ranch horses. He jumped down off the horse and marched over, anger radiating off him. “Well now I know why you weren’t answering your phone,” he snapped. Stopping right at the water’s edge, he turned to Alex. “I know you!” he exclaimed, pointing at him. “You’re the jerk from the bar the other night.”
“Josh!” I shouted.
“It’s fine Savannah,” Alex assured me, moving slightly so he was standing in front of me.
Josh must have noticed what he was doing and let out a sarcastic laugh. “You think I’m going to hurt her?” Josh shouted, shaking his head. “It’s you who let a pregnant woman ride here with one hand,” he yelled at him. I sucked my breath in sharply and closed my eyes as I waited for Alex to realize what Josh had said.
“Pregnant?” he asked, confused. He turned around to face me. “Savannah, what’s going on?”
“I’m sorry Alex, I wanted to tell you, I just didn’t know how.” I dropped my eyes from his and fiddled with the bandage on my hand, shame engulfing me.
“So, it’s true?” he asked, the disbelief evident in his voice. I forced myself to look at him and was met with angry eyes. I nodded slowly. “You agreed to go on a date with me, knowing you were pregnant?”
“You were pushing me to go out with you. I told you I had a lot going on.”
He took a step closer to me. “Why didn’t you just tell me you were pregnant? Were you planning to sleep with me then tell me the baby was mine?” he growled at me, the nice guy from a few minutes before suddenly gone.
“What? No! Of course not,” I exclaimed, taking a step back. “I’m not a slut!”
“Could have fooled me sweetheart!”
“Hey!” Josh yelled from behind him. “Don’t speak to her like that!” Alex spun around to face him, and I breathed a small sigh of relief that his anger was no longer focused on me.
“This has nothing to do with you, it’s between me and Savannah. What are you even doing here anyway?” Alex snapped.
“It has everything to do with me,” Josh replied. “And there is no you and Savannah. You need to leave, now!”
“You don’t get to tell me what to do,” Alex said, turning and grabbing me. I yelped as his hand gripped my upper arm and he pulled me toward him.
“Take your hands off her!” Josh bellowed, walking into the water toward us. As Alex turned to confront him, Josh swung his fist, punching Alex in the face. I stumbled slightly as Alex lost his grip on my arm, and I watched as he fell backward into the water.
“You’re done here Alex. Take the horse back and leave her alone. Come on Savannah,” Josh said, reaching for my good hand and guiding me out of the water. Overwhelmed by what had just happened, I followed him in silence. “Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” he asked once we were out of earshot of Alex, the fingers of his hand brushing against the arm Alex had grabbed.
“What the hell just happened? Why are you here Josh?” I asked him, pulling my hand from his and turning to look back toward the river, where I saw Alex staggering out of the water, blood pouring from his nose.
“I saw you ride off on Marley and I was worried about you. You shouldn’t be riding while you’re pregnant, and given what just happened, I think it was a good thing I was here, don’t you?” Josh replied cockily.
I stared at him in disbelief. “Are you out of your mind? That never would have happened if you hadn’t shown up!” I exclaimed, gesturing toward the water. “It has nothing to do with you if I ride or not—I’ve been riding since I could walk and I know what I’m doing. How dare you tell Alex I’m pregnant! Everything was fine until you showed up.”
“Well I assumed that as you had your tongue halfway down his throat, you had already told him you were pregnant. I assumed you would have had that conversation when he asked you out!”
“Don’t you dare judge me. It is none of your business who I choose to tell, and it’s even less of your business who I’m kissing. Just back off.” I paused, taking a deep breath. “In fact, stay away from me completely.” I could have sworn I saw a flash of pain cross his face, but it disappeared as quickly as it had come. “I appreciate all your help with the cottage, I really do, but I think it’s best if we stay away from each other. I’m tired of hurting Josh, and whenever I’m around you, I end up hurt.” I turned away from him and headed for where Marley was grazing with Titan.
“Savannah?” Josh shouted after me.
“Please leave me alone Josh,” I replied. Not waiting for a response, I mounted Marley as quickly as I could with one hand and galloped away from the river toward the ranch, leaving Josh and Alex to make their own way back. I didn’t want to speak to either of them. Josh acted like he had some claim over me, but when it came down to it, didn’t actually want me. Now, Alex thought I was a slut—just perfect.
Tears tracked down my face as I replayed the events of the last 15 minutes in my mind. I was furious with Josh that he had turned up and blurted out to Alex about the baby. I’d known agreeing to go out with Alex had been a mistake, but never had I imagined the date ending as it had. I was taken aback by him kissing me, and I had been just about to tell him we shouldn’t see each other again. The kiss only confirmed to me that I was right, and for me there were no feelings there—how could there be when my head and heart were full of Josh? Although at the moment, I wanted to kill him.
As angry as I was with Josh, I couldn’t help remembering the flash of pain I’d seen on his face when I’d told him to stay away from me. My heart clenched at the thought of not seeing him, but I knew from the past week that the pain of being around him was far worse than the pain of not seeing him at all. It was only a matter of time before he met someone, and I couldn’t bear to be around when that happened.
Thankfully, neither Josh nor Alex followed me home after the date from hell, and I couldn’t have been more grateful. I was in no rush to see either of them—in fact, I was convinced I’d never see Alex again, which was fine by me. Unfortunately, I couldn’t say the same about Josh. While I’d asked him to stay away from me, he was Brody’s best friend, and it was inevitable that I would see him around the ranch at some point.
My mom was home when I got back and we spent the afternoon in Marble Falls shopping for the cottage. We had decided I would move in the following weekend, so I wanted to get as much organized as I could. I didn’t actually need a lot; my parents had conveniently decided they were remodeling the den and had offered me pretty much everything in there, which turned out to be perfect for the sitting room in the cottage. I was pretty sure remodeling wasn’t something they had been planning to do, but it was their way of helping me out. I told them it wasn’t necessary, but they insisted that they had been meaning to redecorate for a while and this was just the push they needed. I didn’t believe them for a second, and my heart swelled at how supportive they were being.
On Monday, Libby and I headed into Marble Falls, checking out flowers and wedding cakes. For someone who read a ton of romance books where everyone fell in love, got married, and lived happily ever after, she had no clue what she wanted for her own wedding. We had narrowed the flowers down to roses, but she still had no idea about a cake or what color she wanted the bridesmaid dresses to be.
We stopped for coffee and Lib picked up on my somber mood. “So, what’s going on Sav? You seem a bit down. What’s happening with you and Josh?” she asked as she blew on her cinnamon latte.
“I’m okay, just a bit anxious about moving into the cottage, and nothing’s happening with Josh, why?” I answered quickly.
“Don’t give me that, I’m not blind—you barely spoke two words to him on Saturday night when we all had dinner. What happened?”
I sighed and sipped my decaf Americano. “Did you know he woke me up from a nap that night, just as you and Mason arrived?”
She nodded. “Yeah, your mom told us you were napping, and when she went to go wake you, Josh volunteered to do it. Is that why you were annoyed with him, b
ecause he woke you up?”
“No Lib, I wanted to be woken, but by my mom. I was wearing my bra and panties and I’d kicked the comforter off—I was pretty much naked!” I watched as she burst out laughing, barley managing to put her latte down before spilling it everywhere.
“Wow! I bet he got any eyeful then,” she said through spurts of laughter.
“I’m glad you’re finding this amusing,” I said dryly. “This is my life at the moment—one big mess.”
“Hey!” she exclaimed, her face changing from amusement to concern. “Your life is not a mess. I’m sorry I laughed. Urghhh, I wish you two would just work things out—it’s painful to watch!”
“It’s painful to live it Lib.” She reached across the table and took my hand. “He tells me I’m beautiful, but when I ask him if his feelings have changed, he says I deserve more than he can give me. I can’t be around him, it hurts too much. I told him to stay away from me…it’s easier this way.”
“Is it?” she asked skeptically.
“Yes,” I insisted, quickly filling her in on my disastrous date with Alex. I watched as she frowned at me. “I know, I know, I shouldn’t have gone out with him at all. It was a terrible idea, but anyway, enough about me and my pathetic excuse for a love life. Let’s get back to wedding planning.”
“I know you’re trying to change the subject, but if you want to talk, I’m here for you.”
“I know, thanks. I’m just sick of thinking about it and trying to figure him out. Sometimes I think he enjoys hurting me.”
“I’m sure that’s not the case. I don’t know what’s going on with him, but I’m sure the last thing he wants is to hurt you.”
“Well he has, numerous times, and I’ve had enough. It’s going to be me and this baby from now on, and I’m fine with that,” I insisted, although I wasn’t sure if it was myself or Libby I was trying to convince.
“You’re going to have tons of support, and your baby is going to be so loved.” I nodded, tears forming in my eyes as we finished our drinks in silence before heading back to the ranch.
