by R. Linda
I cried for myself and for my real parents, whose son was stolen from the shopping centre twenty-one years ago. They would have assumed I was long dead by now. They would have grieved and mourned and moved on from their loss, not knowing I was here the whole time, being held captive.
Ray would wake up soon. Battered. Bruised. And furious. He would see me here, in the garage on the floor with the door open and the girls nowhere to be seen. At first, he would be confused, then he would frantically rush around the house in search of them. After a while, he would realise what I had done, and he would come for me. He would see how I’d destroyed his perfect family—the one he had been building for twenty-one years, ever since he abducted me.
I wouldn’t fight him. I’d take whatever he threw at me.
Nothing mattered anymore but Kat and Lucy.
They were free and I was dead.
I was ready for it. I felt sorrow and regret for all I had done to help Ray over the years, and I’d had enough of this life and its torture and pain.
I was done.
Lucy
I HIT THE pavement hard and screamed out in pain, my hands doing little to break my fall. I tried to push myself up and stand but my ankle rolled, and I collapsed again. I couldn’t go on. Kat stopped running and came back for me, crouching down and ripping my six-inch heels off before doing the same to hers.
“Come on, Luce. We gotta go,” she urged, looking over her shoulder and trying to pull me up. I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t get up and keep running. I didn’t want to. My legs burned from running so fast. I had always been a strong runner. But this was hard, and even though I was quite literally running for my life, I didn’t want to. Months of being locked in a basement, my muscles had atrophied, weakened, and I couldn’t run any more. I wanted to give up. This little patch of pavement was comfortable enough that I could probably just curl up and go to sleep. I’d run again in the morning.
We were free.
We escaped Ray.
But we left Hendrix behind. The stupid idiot basically threw himself under the bus to save us. He sacrificed himself for us to get out and I couldn’t find it in me to continue. Cars in the distance could be heard driving past, most likely on a highway. Dogs were howling at the full moon. I had no clue where we were. I didn’t even know if I was still in the same state. It looked like an industrial area. Lots of factories and warehouse-type buildings surrounded us.
“Lucy. Come on!” Kat gritted her teeth and attempted to lift me from the comfortably cold concrete.
“I can’t, Kat. I’m tired.” I shook my head and tried to gasp in as much fresh air as I could. My chest was tight as I struggled to catch my breath from both running and crying. The tears hadn’t stopped since I left Hendrix behind, bleeding in the hell house. He was alone. We’d left him like that, to face the wrath of Ray.
Damn him. Why couldn’t he have just run with us?
“You can. We have to.”
I knew I should get up, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t explain why. I just needed to go back.
“No, Kat. I just want to go home.”
“That’s what I’m trying to do. Let’s go.”
“No, home to Hendrix. I want to go back,” I told her, and she froze. Her eyes were wide, and her mouth fell open. The look she was giving me scared me. Had I done something wrong? Or said something I shouldn’t have?
“Home? To Hendrix?” she asked slowly, and I nodded before she repeated herself, “Home?”
“Yes, home. I can’t leave him behind. We can’t leave him behind!” I wondered why she was still looking at me like that. Like I had just told her I was really an alien with six heads and my home planet was made of jelly. She was looking at me like I was crazy. I wasn’t crazy, I wanted to go back to Hendrix. I wanted to be with him, keep him safe like he kept me safe. And I couldn’t do that if I was out here in the real world.
“Sweetie, that’s not home,” she murmured, reaching for my hands.
What was she talking about? Of course, it was home. It had been my home for the past few months and strangely enough, it felt more caring and loving than it ever had at my parents’ place.
“It is. Hendrix is there. Wherever he is, I am. Don’t you get it? He’s my husband, Kat. I can’t leave without him. And if he is staying then so am I. It’s what a marriage is all about. Sickness, health, the good and the bad. Till death do us part. In a marriage you make sacrifices and compromises.”
“You’re not really married, Lucy. It was all an act, remember?” She spoke fast, urgently. She didn’t get it, though. Hendrix and I were linked. Joined. Soulmates. Bound together because of his fucked up father.
“I love him, Kat. I can’t leave him.” I yanked my hand out of hers. If she wasn’t going to help me, then I’d find my own way back to him.
“Love is tainted, remember?”
I stared at her, not trusting myself to keep my mouth shut or to not throw myself on her and pull her hair. How could she say that? Love wasn’t tainted. It was pure. It was divine. It was true.
“Our love is not tainted,” I whispered. The look in her eyes was haunting.
“You said so yourself, just before we left. You told Hendrix not to use that word because it was tainted. Ray took all meaning out of it. Remember?”
I grit my teeth and stared at the ground refusing to make eye contact with her. How could she leave him behind so easily after all he did for her, for us?
“For fuck’s sake, Lucy. Think of Hendrix.” She gripped the collar of my striped dress in her hands and shook me.
“I am. He’s all I’m thinking about. What sort of wife leaves her husband behind like that?”
“A fake one. One that was forced into a marriage that wasn’t real. He helped you escape. He wants you to be free and happy. He wants you safe, and the only way to ensure that is if you run with me now.”
“But he won’t be safe.”
Her open palm came up out of nowhere and hit me across my right cheek. It stung worse than anything I’d felt yet, probably due to the bitter cold air slowly freezing my skin. I raised my hand to my face to soothe the pain and glared at Kat. She just didn’t get it. If I couldn’t stay at the house with him, I had to at least try to save him too. I had to get him out of there.
So he could be with me.
“If we keep running we can go to the police. Tell them who we are. Where we were held. They’ll rescue Hendrix. I know you care about him. I do too. I don’t want to leave him there, but if we go back, we’ll never get out again. So please, Lucy. For me. For Hendrix, move your fucking legs and run.”
It hit me then. Why she was acting so strange. Why she was determined to make me run. She’d lost her mind. She’d been held captive for too long. She’d slapped me. She’d yelled at me. She was crazy too. Just like Ray. She was probably going to lure me into another dark basement somewhere and chain me to the radiator. I knew what I had to do. I had to appease her. Had to make her think I agreed with everything she said and did. Just like I did with Ray. I had to fool Kat into thinking I was okay with running away and leaving Hendrix behind. It was the only way I could escape from her and get back to him.
“Okay.” I nodded my head slowly. I had to come up with a plan to get rid of her before she completely lost her mind and snapped. Standing up and dusting off my skirt, I followed Kat in the direction we had been running before my heel broke and I’d fallen.
We ran for what felt like hours. I was sure my feet were shredded and bleeding from not wearing shoes, but that was the least of my worries. I was still trying to find a way to get away from Kat. Every time I thought there was enough distance between us, I’d try to turn a corner and run in a different direction, but she was always one step ahead and knew what I was planning to do before I even thought it.
She was good. Too good. She learned from the best. She’d learned from Ray.
Eventually, we made it out of the backstreets of the industrial area, and things started to look familiar. We w
ere still in town and I finally had my bearings back. I knew where we were and my way around.
Kat slowed to a walk and began mumbling to herself. “No. No. No. Where?”
“Kat?”
“Lucy. Where are we?”
“We’re in town,” I told her as I recognised more features of my neighbourhood.
“Town?” Her eyes were round and glassy. Fearful. She was scared.
“Yes. I know exactly where we are. I lived here before Hendrix.” I wanted to kick myself for mentioning Hendrix’s name in case she started acting crazy again, but she didn’t seem to notice or care.
“Ray.” Her voice was barely a whisper, but that name sent chills up my spine. “He drinks at a bar in town. How many bars are there in this place? And where are they?”
I looked around and tried to gauge exactly where we were. “Oh, there are two,” I said as I remembered exactly where they were. One was the one I worked at on the other side of town in the sticks, and the other one was…
“And?”
“My bar, on the other side of town and one just up a bit further along this road. Actually, I think you can almost see it from here.” I pointed to the soft orange glow of the lights in the distance, feeling excited that we were close to civilisation. Maybe I could go to the bar and lose Kat in there somewhere, then I could find my way back to Hendrix.
“Shit,” Kat cried and grabbed my arm, dragging me behind a tree as a car drove past.
“Do you want to go to the bar?” I asked her. A plan already forming in my head. I had a rough idea where the house was and was sure I could find my way home to Hendrix pretty easily.
“No. Lucy, I want to find the police station.”
The police station wasn’t too far. Perhaps Kat was right and they would go and rescue Hendrix before it was too late. And if they didn’t, I’d find a way back. I had to. I couldn’t bear the thought of something terrible happening to him. If he was left alone with Ray for too long, I shuddered to think what the result would be. Who would be the one to dig the hole in the woods for Hendrix’s body? Because there was no way that fucked up psycho would let Hendrix off this time with a beating. I mean, he did just help us escape after Ray had found his perfect family.
What a screwed-up family.
My heart broke for Hendrix. Hendrix, the child who watched his mother die and his father lose the plot so completely that he began abducting women to replace his lost love. Hendrix, the teenager whose sole responsibility was to dispose of bodies and hide all evidence. And Hendrix, the man who risked his life to save ours. He threw himself on the line so we would be safe.
I knew Ray loved Hendrix, you could see it, he just had a terrible way of expressing it and an even worse temper. Ray had more than a few screws loose in his head, that was for sure. I just hoped his love for Hendrix would win out over his psychotic mind for a little while longer as we tried to get help.
“Follow me, I know where it is from here,” I told Kat.
Hendrix
GONE.
She was gone.
Safe.
Happy.
Everything would be okay. For her. For us. For Ray and me.
It had to be.
He was my dad. We’d find a way through this. I’d convince him that we were better off without Lucy and Kat. Maybe he could learn to be happy with just the two of us. If not, then we’d just have to find two more girls to bring home. Girls that would bend to Ray’s will and give him what he wanted. Girls that no one would miss, like I missed Lucy. Ray could find someone to replace Kat, and I could pick up someone to take Lucy’s place.
Except no one could ever take Lucy’s place. And I didn’t want anyone to try. And I didn’t want to put anyone else through that again.
I just wanted Lucy.
But I could never have her. Not with the threat of Ray looming over us. I wouldn’t risk her life, or her body again. No. She was better off without me in her life. She could return to school, make new friends and hopefully even reconnect with her parents. She had a chance at a normal life. All I could ever offer her was pain and torture.
Unless…
I pushed myself up from the cold concrete floor, unsure of how long I had been there for. Minutes? Hours? It was dark, and it felt like an eternity since I’d kissed Lucy goodbye. I trudged back into the house and crept down the stairs, trying not to make a sound in case Ray was conscious and moving about somewhere.
I found his body still in a heap on the floor where we’d left him. Blood soaked the front of his grey pants from where Lucy’s heel impaled him over and over. His entire face was swollen, I wasn’t even sure he’d be able to open his eyes if he did regain consciousness. He looked broken. Defeated.
I dropped to the floor and sat beside him. I didn’t know what to do. I wanted to leave, but I didn’t want to leave him. As fucked up as he was, he was still my dad. The only father I had ever known. He was a monster, but I loved him. He raised me, and I’d like to think I turned out pretty good, so there must have been some redeeming qualities in him. He can’t have been all bad. I refused to believe that a person could be so completely cold and cruel. But then I couldn’t recall a single good memory of him. Not one where he was a real father. He fed me, he clothed me, he home-schooled me and kept me out of trouble. Or was it just him keeping me out of the public in case someone figured out who I was and that he had kidnapped me too?
My entire life had been a lie. I didn’t remember my real parents at all. I’d tried, so many times over the past few weeks to find one memory of them, but there was nothing. Only Ray and the women he brought home. The women he tortured, raped and killed when they didn’t work out, when they fought against him and tried to escape. So much needless death. Why couldn’t he have been happy with me? Just me. We could have lived a normal life. I never would have known any different. I never would have known that he wasn’t my father, and if I did, I may have even forgiven him for stealing my life, like he did to so many others.
But…
I never would have met Lucy.
Even if he promised to never abduct another woman again, we could never live the life we should have. The police would come soon, and they would take him away. Where would that leave me? Alone. Lost. I had no idea how to make it in the real world. I couldn’t find my real parents now, it would be too strange. To them I was long gone.
We could run.
Ray and I. We could get in the car and be halfway across the country before the police came looking.
No. I was losing focus. Ray was a lost cause.
Lucy.
She was the important one here. Not me. Not Ray. Everything I did was to keep Lucy safe, to give her her life back. To end the nightmares and the fear she felt in the dark. There was only one solution.
Ray stirred then. Moved slightly, groaning as he did and tried to open his eyes. Time was running out. I knew what I had to do. Ray moaned in pain.
“Shhh, Dad, it’s okay. You’ll be okay,” I whispered and placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him from sitting up because he’d only cause himself further pain. “Let me help you,” I said and stood up to get a wet cloth from the bathroom Lucy and I would never share again.
I returned to Ray and cleaned his face, wiping the dried blood from his hairline and hands all while telling him, “Everything will be okay. You’ll see. I’ll fix everything. I’m sorry I hurt you. But you hurt Lucy and I couldn’t let you do that, Dad. She was mine. Not yours. But it’s over now.”
I reached for the rope that was dangling off the end of the bed. The same rope Ray used to tie Lucy up. “It’s okay. It’s over now.” I wrapped it around his neck and pulled. “It’s over.”
Rays hands reached up and tried to pull the thick cord from my hands, away from his neck but he couldn’t get a hold of it. He screamed and groaned and thrashed his body around on the floor, but my grip didn’t ease. I only pulled tighter. He gasped for breath, his arms flailing around him.
And then he stopped.
I held the rope in place for a minute before I released.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I had no choice. You left me with no other option. Why couldn’t you have been a normal father? I’m sorry. It’s better this way,” I whispered to his unbreathing body.
Warm tears were running down my face. I’d killed him.
It was over.
I should have felt relief. But I didn’t.
I had become the man I never wanted to be.
A killer.
Just like Ray.
Lucy
THE SUN WAS just rising outside. I could see it through the frosted window of the interrogation room. We’d been there for hours. And hours. I was exhausted. I was hungry. And I was dirty. I wanted to go back to the house and have a shower. I wanted to lay on the bed next to Hendrix and hear him tell me that everything would be okay.
I leaned forward and thumped my head on the table. “Please. Can I just go now? I’ve answered all your questions and told you what happened a hundred and forty-seven god damn times. We’re wasting time here. You have to save Hendrix before it’s too late,” I murmured into the cold Formica table top. My throat was hoarse from all the yelling, and I just didn’t have the energy.
“Just one more time, Lucy. Please. We know how hard this is for you, but we want to make sure we have all the information before we proceed. We can’t just ram the door down on a man’s house and force our way in.” The female detective smiled condescendingly at me and smoothed her hair back into its already too-tight bun that made her eyes pull up at the corners.
