His mother refused to accept me, and as a consequence, her selfish and stubborn refusal was driving a wedge between Luca and myself. Each day brought a new problem, some big and some small, but each one caused the rift to widen, sending Luca and me further and further apart. As much as I fought, the cracks in our relationship reared their ugly heads, and I was doing everything in my power to hold on.
Today we were hosting a family barbeque, a traditional Aussie backyard party. Well, traditional save for the professional caters setting up in the yard, with their fancy tablecloths, padded seat cushions, and even a classical gazebo made by Luca and his crew last weekend.
Not a barbeque in sight, I thought sadly. Instead, a portable pig spit was hired, coming with a chef and a chef’s assistant. Luca caved to his mother’s demands when she nearly fainted after I told her my father would be manning the grill. Irena did not like Lennie any more than she did Trish; she thought them uncouth and without decorum. She expressed this not only to Luca but to my parents as well, which is why I was sitting on the deck watching strangers walk around in white chef coats and not down there scraping off the barbie with a wire brush.
My phone beeped alerting me to an incoming text, looking at it, seeing it was from Luca.
On our way, baby.
I stared at the screen and debated how to reply. That annoyed me too; once not long ago, I would have replied with some sass and sexy comments about what I wanted him to do to me tonight. Instead, I sent him a thumbs-up emoji thought twice about whether I should add two x’s or not before growling at my phone and hit send.
That was what I hated the most about this whole thing. Luca’s whole demeanour had changed, he was distant at times, and his stress was palpable. I found myself tiptoeing around him so as not to stir him up or start an argument. He stayed later at work, went to his mother’s afterwards, and not getting home until after tea, claiming he ate at his mum’s house. Another worry for me, five times the past month, Luca had left me in the middle of the night after receiving a call from his mum, sometimes not coming back until just before the alarm goes off.
His sisters, too, had no respect for our privacy, using their own key to Luca’s house as if it was their god given right. They barged into the house and even our bedroom at all times of the night. Kayla was the worst culprit; one night, she let herself in and sat down on the edge of our bed while we slept. Waking us with a shrill scream, then complaining that her bedroom light globe had blown and demanded that Luca go and swap it over. The night after that, we went back to staying at my house, Luca agreed with me, but I could tell it irked him.
Dinners at my parent’s place got the short shaft; he either left early or didn’t show up at all. I had even started taking my own car, getting tired of the pitying looks from my family when one of them had to drive me home.
This was the first time in a week being back at Luca’s, the get together would not have taken place otherwise. Mrs Donatella declared that she would rather be six foot under than set a foot inside my abode.
Abode! Her hoity-toity attitude pissed me off; her controlling Luca with the memory of his father and his god-awful sisters’ pathetic snivelling angered me to the point the insides of my mouth had teeth marks from biting the insides of my cheeks.
I hated them, they hated me, and Luca was stuck in the middle, trying to appease everyone. His mother was taking advantage of his loyalty and kind heart.
The sound of the glass sliding door opening sent a chill down my spine. I knew what it meant, I knew I had to get up, but I was just so tired, so exhausted both mentally and physically I debated staying up there on the deck and let my parents loose on the enemy.
“They are here, baby girl,” Trish murmured quietly, her hand laying gently on my shoulder.
“I know,” I sighed, sipping at the tea, not moving to get up.
“Meadow, honey, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. Those horrible women aren’t worth—”
“It’s not about them, Mum,” I interrupted her, surprising myself when the title slipped out and not her name.
“I’m not doing this for them; I don’t go home alone or to your place without Luca for them. I do it for Luca because I love him, just him.” Two hands cupped my face from behind and tilted my head back until Trish came into my view.
“I know that, baby girl, but I am worried about you. You have lost weight, and you don’t smile anymore; you are tense, and you constantly look at your phone waiting to hear from him. This stress is making you ill, Meadow, it needs to end,” Trish stressed angrily.
Trish had a point; over the past month, I had lost two dress sizes, and my clothes hung off me because my appetite had disappeared. I was sleeping at work on the antique couch Luca and I used to make love on and it has now become quite a habit.
I knew why, not the weight loss, but I understood why all I could do was sleep lately—knowing and saying it out loud, though? Nope, not the time or the place.
“I’m fine Trish, Luca said they would come around soon,” I lied to my mother. Luca had said that, but I didn’t believe him then, any more than I believed myself now. I could not see an end to this feud, this hatred, and that broke my heart because things were about to change dramatically. And I couldn’t see Luca winning his battle, and if he lost, then we both lost.
Heavy footsteps behind the glass door heralded the arrival of my handsome Spunk, I smelled his cologne, felt his warmth, and if I closed my eyes, I could see his sexy smirk—something he rarely did these days.
Mum smiled sadly down at me, then moved away, and Luca’s face replaced hers.
“Hey, beautiful, everything looks good down there,” he murmured, leaning down to kiss me on the lips.
“Hey there, Spunk. Yeah, it does, not that I had anything to do with it. The caterer didn’t need any help from me,” I answered, injecting as much enthusiasm into my voice as I could manage.
“Meadow—”
“They said they didn’t need the barbeque. What kind of backyard get-together doesn’t include a barbie, Luca?”
“Baby—”
Swivelling in the outdoor seat, I grabbed hold of his shirt and pulled him down closer to me. Worry etched on his face, guilt-tripping me for saying anything at all.
“Kiss me, Luca, kiss me like you can’t live without me,” I pleaded, hating that I sounded so pathetic, so needy.
“Meadow, I can’t live without you, I won’t, baby, but Mum is waiting—”
As if the woman in question knew I wanted time alone with Luca, her radar honed in.
“Luca! Where are you?”
The growl left my lips without permission, but I couldn’t find it to give a crap. Weeks of holding myself back and not being me all came crashing down around me.
“Can’t she wait for a few minutes? Didn’t she just drive over with you? Am I not allowed to have a second with you just to kiss?” I spat out loud enough so anyone standing in the room behind would be able to hear me.
“Meadow, that is enough. What is wrong with you, fucking hell?” Luca scolded me, his tone warning but low, because, god forbid, if his mother heard him swearing at the age of twenty-nine.
Jumping to my feet, my limit reached, I did something I promised I would not do. I lost my temper.
“Her!” I screamed, pointing a finger at Mrs Donatella, who was standing by the door, glaring at me.
“Your mother and your sisters, Luca, that is what is wrong with me. They have you chasing your tail and jumping at their every command. You break dates with me for them, and you immediately leave me when they call. Hell! If they clicked their fingers, I wouldn’t be surprised if you sat down and panted.”
Pushing the chair, so it was now between us, I created a visible barrier to stop myself from throwing myself in his arms and begging for forgiveness. I was important. My needs were real. My heart was breaking, and no one seemed to care.
“My mother, that is who you are talking about like this, yes?” Luca growled, hi
s eyes narrowed and fierce.
“Yeah, your mother, Luca, apparently the most useless woman on the planet. You have a sister that can’t change a light globe at two in the morning. Another one who won’t drive to the supermarket because she doesn’t want to park her car where it might get scratched. Need I go on?”
“No, I think you should stop before you go too far, Meadow,” he warned.
“Too late, Luca, your selfish family has pushed me for weeks now. They insult me constantly, they speak down to my parents and siblings, and you let it happen because you refuse to hold your nerve and tell them to back off.” Tears filled my eyes, blurring my vision, but I didn’t let them deter me. Luca needed to know that he was failing; he was failing me.
“Your mother always throws your father’s memory in your face. It seems to be her weapon of choice.” Throwing a death glare at the horrible matriarch, I sneered at her.
“If he was the kind of man that would agree with this kind of behaviour then he wasn’t much of a man at all. And not one I ever wished to meet.”
A collection of gasps from Luca, his mother, and another person I guessed was Kayla were quickly followed by a banshee screech from Mrs Donatella. I felt Luca’s eyes on me, but my interest was on his mother and the evil smile on her cruel lips.
Oh, this was not going to be good.
Then before anyone could attack me for what I had unfairly said, Luca’s mother twisted her mouth in a smirk that chilled my blood then dropped to the floor like a bag of sand, hitting her head on the corner of the door frame as she fell.
And that was that. Luca shouted for his mother, rushing to her, sisters screamed bloody murder, and I was the bad guy and forgotten about—again.
Well played, old lady, very well played.
***
“Well?” I asked my brother when he came back to the waiting room. His girlfriend’s mum was a nurse in the ED, so I talked Breck into trying to get any details on Mrs Donatella’s condition seeing as though Luca had not made an appearance since arriving with his mother in the ambulance.
The scene back at the house still blew my mind, the chaos after she fake fainted, the judgemental glares and the shock directed at me from Luca. That hurt the most, never had he ever looked at me, like he did while he bent over his mum. I felt the blame and the condemnation roll off him. He never spoke to me when he pulled out his phone and called triple zero. He never looked my way when the paramedics loaded the faker on the gurney and wheeled her away.
Nada. And it has been like that since I arrived with Mum and Brecken, sitting out here like a dumb arse in the most uncomfortable chair, starving and tired.
Breck flopped down in the seat beside me, taking my hand and giving it a squeeze.
“Sorry, sissy, the family has requested no one out here is to be told anything. But if it helps, that came from Kayla, not Luca.” Breck rushed to add when Mum reached a hand out and slapped him on the back of the head.
“I didn’t think we would find out, but it was worth a shot.”
“Maybe we should head back to your place, Meadow,” Mum suggested, “that chair can’t be doing anything for your back and you haven’t eaten for god knows how long. You have to think about the baby, missy.”
I reared back in my seat, my hands flying to cover my stomach.
“How? … what? … how? … huh?” shocked silly, I gaped at my mother, in shock and in awe.
How the hell did she know? I only found out myself that morning after taking seven pregnancy tests in the small bathroom at the shop.
“I may not be your typical mother, Meadow, but I am a woman. I know the signs, weight loss, tiredness, and you have developed a grumpy growl that is very cute but quickly getting on my nerves.” Trish winked at me, then busied herself with rummaging through her handbag, then produced a Mars Bar and tossed it at me.
“When I grow up, I want to be just like you.”
“Liar,” Trish laughed, then took the chocolate bar back and ripped it open, and took a big bite.
“Hey! You gave that to me,” I protested, mourning the loss of the sweet treat.
“You snooze you lose.”
“Bet you don’t want to be like her now, hey sissy,” Breck whisper shouted, leaning over to give my cheek a quick kiss.
“He doesn’t know,” I announced all of a sudden. “And I don’t think we are going to make it to raise this kid together.”
“Meadow.”
“Fuck, sissy.”
Lifting my head, I looked at my mother first, then at my brother, and saw the pity I knew would be there in their eyes. “He chooses the baby and me; he will be miserable. He chooses them over me, and I will die. So I am taking the decision out of his hands.”
“Luca will never be free of the responsibility that comes with being the son of Massimo and Irena Donatella. They will never loosen the iron hold they have on him to be happy with me.” Tears streamed down my face as I make the hardest decision of my life.
“I won’t trap him as they do. I love him, but I don’t own him. So—”
Just then, the automatic doors that lead to the patient area flew open with an ominous hush, and Luca appeared looking grim, worried and tired. And oh, so sexy.
I watched as he scanned the room, looking for something, looking for me. The second his eyes found me, the calm that would normally flow over me … didn’t.
Quickly getting to my feet, I stood and waited for him to come to me. Watching for the last time his wonderous body, his handsome face; and felt my heart shatter into a million shards.
“Can we talk, please?” he asked, looking down at the floor, anywhere but at me.
“Luca, I don’t think this is the time,” Trish advised but she was cut off not by Luca but by me.
“It’s the right time and the right place,” I declared, finding the strength to say what needed to be said.
“I am sorry that your mum got hurt, Luca.”
“Are you, Meadow? I am having a hard time with all of this, but your behaviour is the hardest to accept,” Luca seethed, speaking to me like I was nothing more than a stranger not worthy of his time.
“Yeah I am; I am sorry that she deliberately fell and got properly hurt from her subterfuge.” Luca started to object, but I was over it. It was my time to speak and my time to be the one to say what needed to be said.
“They aren’t ever going release you from your obligations or their clutches. I know that now. I also know I can not sit back and let them dictate the terms of our relationship anymore. You might not realise it, Luca, but you let them do this to you. Because of some misguided loyalty to your father, you allow those four women to control you, and I have had enough of being fifth place.”
Luca’s eyes widened almost comically, his mouth gaping like a fish out of water, wanting to argue, but no words would come because deep down, he knew I was right.
“Those things I said about your dad were hurtful and unfair, I might not have known him, but I know you. I can’t believe that the man that raised such a wonderful son could possibly be anything other than just as wonderful. I also can’t help wondering if this is what he wanted for you. To be played and used as a pawn in the games your family obviously cruelly enjoy.”
“I won’t stand silent anymore, it’s not fair to me, to you or our baby.” Ignoring his shocked gasp, I took his hands and placed them on my flat stomach, happy that he didn’t pull back or protest. Just one last touch, one last feel of his hands on me and I would leave knowing I had Luca Donatella’s love for a brief time.
“Their evil will not touch my child. He or she will never hear their cruel taunts or endure anything other than love.” Stealing myself, I looked up at Luca one last time, his own cheeks dripping with tears, his eyes glued to his hands on my belly.
“I will never make you choose, Luca, but I won’t stay and be treated so abhorrently all because I love and adore you. I just can’t.”
My lips begged to kiss him, and my arms ached to hold him; instea
d, I pulled my hands from under his and stepped back on wobbly legs.
“I love you, Spunk, you are the love of my life. No other man will be able to hold my heart because you own it. I’m just not the one for you.” With that final decree, I allowed Brecken to wrap an arm around my shoulders and lead me away from the only man I wanted. The only man whose touch I would ever remember, the only man I ever wanted to kiss.
The man whose child grew inside me.
Then I felt the last shard drop and I wondered if I was ever going to survive walking away from him.
“Where the hell is she?” In my office late, as usual, I stormed around my phone in my hand. I had called everyone I could think of to call, and no one would tell me where Meadow took off to. Three weeks and I was about to go to the local television station and have her picture plastered on the evening news.
Three weeks since she dropped the bombshell on me that I was going to be a father … then she dropped me. I could still hear her words, her tears and the look of utter devastation on her beautiful face. The strength she showed me standing up for herself, like the Meadow I first met and fell in love with, before my stupidity took over and disrespected her.
In that last month, I noticed the changes in her. I noticed the light left her gorgeous green eyes, saw and ignored the hurt I caused her whenever I answered my phone and rushed out the door. I either ignored it or admitted that it was me killing our relationship, and I couldn’t bring myself to believe that.
Admitting that meant I had to acknowledge I was the one that failed, not her. That I put Meadow aside in preference for making my mum happy, doing my sisters’ bidding like swapping out a blown light globe at two in the morning instead of staying in bed with my girlfriend.
“Fuck, I should have taken back those keys!”
Dramatic, Mushy, Complicated Love Page 16
