“But what if he’s even more off his rocker than we think?” she argued.
“Then you come and live with the two of us,” Jesse said. “Then you’re away from the kids but not all alone. You’d have me and Anthony to look after you.”
“I’m not… You’re about to get…” Cadence spun around to face the rest of the room, staying in my arms, though. “The last thing the two of you need is a third wheel.”
“Oh, hush now,” he replied.
Sara plopped down on the arm of Jonny’s recliner, rolling her eyes. “So you forget all the crazy ideas in your head about protecting everyone else and stay put. The cops are going to arrest him. One of these days—and probably soon—he’s going to do something dumb enough that he’ll get caught, and they’ll throw his ass in jail—”
“Mommy said ass!” Connor shouted.
“—and then they’ll deport him. You can be done with him for good.” Sara finished it without even paying her son’s outburst any attention.
“Not for good, though. What if he goes after Mom? Or Chloe or Corinne? He can find all of them easily enough and torment them to get to me.”
“You can’t protect the whole world, Cadence,” Jonny said. “And who says getting away from us will be enough to make him leave us alone? If he’d go after Mom, what’s to say he wouldn’t try to attack someone you care about here, whether you’re around or not?”
“Would you stop being reasonable?” she said, throwing up her hands. I rubbed her arms, trying to calm her down, but she was so worked up I doubted it would help much, if at all. She leaned back into me, though. “Everyone needs to stop making sense, because Guy doesn’t. He just doesn’t make any sense at all. He’s gone off the deep end, and I’m trying to be sure if he’s going to hurt anyone, it’ll be me and not one of you. Because I can’t handle that.” She shook her head adamantly. “I can’t. If he did anything to—”
“Then come and stay with me,” I said, cutting her off before she went any further into panic mode.
She went completely still against me. Silent.
Well, fuck. We’d gone straight from everything progressing nicely to now she might want to run away. I should’ve eased her into the idea instead of tossing it out there like I had, but it was too late to take it back.
Now I had to pick up the pieces.
STAY WITH LEVI? Was that honestly what he’d just suggested?
I glanced at Cam, who raised a brow.
Maybe I’d misheard him. Because if Levi actually had suggested I move in with him, surely Cam would be shouting threats at him or something similar, but instead he was looking expectantly at me.
Levi had stopped rubbing my arms, and he’d gone kind of rigid after asking me. So maybe I’d heard him right, after all.
“You don’t have to go live with him if that’s not what you want,” Sara rushed to say, after a prolonged silence. “But I don’t think anyone in this room is going to sit back and tell you we’re fine with you not staying with someone. You can stay here. You can go live with Anthony and Jesse. You can move into Levi’s apartment. Hell, I think half the other wives and girlfriends with the team would invite you to come live with them if it comes down to it. But you can’t go off somewhere all by yourself with no one else around. Not gonna happen.”
“I’ve got a guest room at my place,” Levi murmured in my ear. “I’m not suggesting… I mean, only if that’s…” He sighed. “This is not easy to talk about with your brother glaring at me.”
I nodded and reached for his hand. “Come with me.” Then I led him up the stairs, away from the insanity that had started the moment he and Cam had returned from their road trip.
“What the hell do you think—”
“We need to talk in private, Cam,” I said, cutting my brother off and not slowing down at all. “Ten minutes. We’ll be back.”
“If she goes to live with him, they’ll be alone a lot of the time, you know,” Sara admonished him.
“Not in my house,” Cam grumbled.
When we got to my room, I closed the door behind us and took a seat on the edge of the bed.
Levi stood there looking uncomfortable as all get out, shifting from foot to foot.
I patted a spot on the bed beside me. “Sit down.”
He shook his head. “I just don’t want you to think this is about me trying to rush you,” he said, staying put. “I’ve got a guest room. You could have your own space. Bathroom. Privacy. I’m—I’m not trying to get you in my bed.”
“I never thought you were.”
“I mean, I want you there. In my bed. But not until you’re ready.” His dimple popped out on his cheek, and he dragged a hand through his hair.
I grinned and ducked my head. He was so embarrassed that I was embarrassed for him. It was kind of sweet. How on earth had I ever thought Levi was even remotely like Guy? The thought of Guy being embarrassed about anything was laughable.
“I know what you mean, Levi,” I said, once I got myself together again. “I know what this is about.”
“I swear, I’m not going to try anyth—”
“Would you please stop making me promises like that?”
He raised a brow.
“It’s kind of flattering to think there might be something more to you asking me to come and live with you than you simply wanting to protect me from a psychotic stalker ex-boyfriend.”
“You can’t honestly believe there’s not a hell of a lot more involved than that, can you? Cadence, I’ve been pursuing you since you first showed up in Portland more than a month ago. Only I’ve been trying to play by your rules and give you the time and space you need to come to terms with the fact that we’re supposed to be together. And I’m still trying to play by those rules. If you’re not—” He broke off for a moment, crossed over to sit beside me. He took my hand, sending tingles racing up and down my spine. “I don’t want to move too fast. You’ve been through hell, and you’re still in hell. I’m trying to be a good guy and put your needs above mine, but it’s not easy when all I can think about is you. Making sure you’re safe. Doing whatever I can to make you happy. Being with you in every possible way.”
I slid the pad of my thumb in lazy circles over the back of his hand.
“I’ve got to be completely honest with you,” he said, taking me by surprise.
“You haven’t been?” I blinked a couple of times, trying to figure out what he could have been lying about.
“For the most part. But I’ve never told you the whole truth about why I started pursuing you.”
“You mean it wasn’t the spread in ESPN: The Body?”
He licked his lips and grinned. “That might have had something to do with it. But seriously… It was really shitty of me. That night, at Burnzie’s house when I first saw you? I was beating myself up again over being less than my brother, and I wanted to find something—anything—where I was a step up on him.”
“I know that. We talked about it that first time we went to Shari’s. How you’re always comparing yourself to him.”
“But I didn’t tell you all of it. The thing is, these days, you’re more famous than Katie, so I thought…”
“You wanted to date me because I was more famous than your brother’s wife?” I spluttered, trying not to laugh. Only, maybe I didn’t try too hard. Or not at all.
He gave me a sheepish look. “I know. It’s ridiculous, right?”
“It’s kind of funny. Did you seriously think that could somehow make you believe in yourself more?”
“Nah. Not me. I just thought maybe some people would be more likely to take me seriously. But I think that was all in my head.”
“Seems to me you’re finally starting to take yourself more seriously—at least if I’m focusing on how you’re playing these days. You’re not hesitating out there. You’re only doing what you know you need to do.”
He shrugged. “Maybe.”
“Something tells me Bergy wouldn’t say maybe about that. O
r your brother. Or anyone.”
“I know. I’m too hard on myself. It’s not an easy habit to break when you’ve been doing it for twenty-four years.”
“But you realize being with me isn’t going to do a darn thing to make you any better or worse than Jamie is, right?”
“Yep. And I’m starting to come to terms with the fact that even though I’ve felt like I’m in competition with him in everything I’ve done my whole life, he hasn’t got a clue.”
“No?”
“No. He only wants the best for me. Like I do for him, to be honest. It’s all been in my head.” He quirked a grin at me, letting that dimple come out again. “Kind of like you. You’re the starring attraction.”
“I’m not just in your head, though. I’m as real as it gets,” I said before I thought better of it. Then I nibbled on my lower lip, watching as his gaze lowered there.
“Trust me.” Levi took a long breath, lingering on it like he was trying to brace himself. “I’m very much aware of precisely how real you are. Too aware.”
My heartbeat was pounding so hard I thought my chest might explode. “So you’re serious about this? About me coming to stay with you?”
“Serious as Jesse’s chocolate-covered-bacon obsession. I’m not scared of what Guy might do to me, but I’m fucking terrified of what he might do to you if he got you alone.”
“So what happens when you guys go back out on the road?”
“Come back here. Go stay with Anthony and Jesse. Katie would love some company, I’m sure, or maybe the two of you could go stay with her mom and have a week-long slumber party. Whatever you want—I just don’t want you to be alone. Not until we’re sure that son of a bitch is out of your life.”
I couldn’t stop chewing on my lip. “I still don’t like the idea of him coming after me while I’m with you.”
“Better than him coming after you when you’re with Connor and Cassidy, though, right?”
I nodded.
“I solemnly swear I’ll keep my hands to myself—unless you don’t want me to.”
Laughter burst free without my permission. “Thought you were going to start quoting the Weasley twins on me.”
“I’ll save that one for when you’re ready.” He winked. “Because at that point, I will be up to no good.”
Something in the general vicinity of my heart fluttered. “All right.”
“All right?”
“I’ll come to stay with you. We can work out the keeping-your-hands-to-yourself part once we’re away from my brother’s house.”
“That sounds like a plan I can live with.”
Surprisingly, it sounded like a plan I could live with, too. “Mischief managed?”
“Not yet, it’s not.” He nipped my nose.
I laughed again as we got up and headed back down the stairs to fill everyone else in on what we’d decided. The smell of pizza nearly knocked me over. Or maybe it was Levi picking me up and carrying me over his shoulder so we could go downstairs to the pizza faster.
As soon as he set me down, Connor demanded his turn to be carried by Tarzan.
“Looks like that one backfired on you,” I said.
The way he looked at me, I got the impression he was more than okay with that.
“WHAT DO YOU wear to a wedding for two gay men?” Levi asked me from down the hall. “I mean, I know that probably sounds like a stupid question, but…”
“Just wear whatever you’d put on for any of your teammates’ weddings,” I called out in return. “Any of the suits you’d use for going to or from a game should work out fine.”
“You’re sure?”
I sighed. “You don’t need to put on a tux, but I’m not taking you with me if you come out with a tracksuit on.”
“Okay. Got it.”
I looked myself over in the mirror, checking to see if there were any holes in my hairdo after all the curling and hairspray and whatnot. It looked all right, from what I could tell. I wished Levi had a handheld mirror, or that I’d thought to bring one of Sara’s over with me when I’d moved in a little over a week ago. But I hadn’t, and he didn’t, and so far I hadn’t found the time to run to the store and buy one.
There hadn’t been a single peep from Guy in all the time I’d been living here. No more creepy notes on my car. No sign of him showing up in parking lots at any of the places I tended to go. He had gone silent enough it was tempting to forget all about him.
I couldn’t, though. The last thing I needed to do was let down my guard. He’d pounce the moment he thought I wasn’t expecting him to do anything.
I’d kept up going to Krav Maga classes and had otherwise gone about my life as though nothing were wrong.
If only that were the truth.
The most natural, normal thing about life since moving into Levi’s apartment was learning to be around each other so much. I wasn’t certain why I’d pushed against him for so long. We were good together.
Insanely good, actually.
Most nights, when he didn’t have a game, we curled up together on the couch for hours, our arms wrapped around each other, watching whatever show was on that night—Black Sails and Impractical Jokers were his two favorites, but he didn’t put up any fight at all when I asked him to watch Downton Abbey with me. Sometimes we kissed. Sometimes we went quite a bit further than kissing, but we never ended up going to bed together. Not yet, at least. It was becoming more and more difficult to go down the hall to my bedroom at the end of the night without trying to drag him along with me. Not only that, but I could tell it was taking every ounce of patience he could muster to take things as slowly as we both realized we needed to take it.
I wasn’t sure how much longer we’d be able to hold out.
For that matter, I wasn’t sure how much longer I wanted to hold out.
My one saving grace was that the team was due to leave for another road trip in a few days, so then we couldn’t jump each other’s bones. Not while he was gone. That trip would also coincide with me needing to be more on my guard again. With Levi and my brother out of the picture, it was far more likely that Guy would strike again. I had to be ready.
With my hair as good as I could manage and my makeup looking decent, I shimmied into the dress I’d picked out to wear today—a soft, coral pink, since that was the color Jesse requested I wear to go with their Valentine’s Day theme—and slipped into my shoes.
I glanced at the clock. We should’ve left five minutes ago. “You ready?” I called out again as I rushed into the living room.
Levi was standing there looking sexier than should be legal in a soft gray suit, striped pale violet shirt, and a teal tie. I stopped short, just to look my fill.
“Shit. Should I have worn pink? I know you told me they were doing pink for everything. I should’ve thought of that. I can go chan—”
“No time to change. We’re already late. You’re fine like this.”
He grabbed both of our coats and helped me into mine. “Only fine?”
“If you ask Jesse, he’ll probably say you’re fine.” I snapped my fingers and head, mimicking Jesse’s move. “And I agree with him.”
Levi pecked me on the nose, his dimple making an appearance, and then ushered me out the front door.
By the time we arrived at the courthouse, the parking lot was jam-packed. We had to find pay parking off the street and hike a short distance to make our way inside. We found seats near the middle just in time.
Anthony came out first, in a black tux with pink cummerbund and bowtie. Then Jesse came out in an insanely fabulous white tux with matching pink accents, including a top hat. The justice of the peace brought everyone to order, and the guys said their vows. It was a quick, tasteful service.
In no time, it was over, and we were all headed back to Anthony’s house for the reception. Or really, since Jesse had put it together, I supposed we should call it a party.
Sara and Cam were there—they’d left the kids with Sara’s dad for the afternoo
n, although I wasn’t sure how they’d convinced Scotty to keep the two little hellions. Since she’d been such a big part of the planning, Sara basically ran the show after everyone was inside. She was good at bossing people around and making sure everything was done the way Anthony and Jesse wanted it.
Levi and I found the happy couple and gave them our presents. Jesse made a big show of kissing both of us on the cheeks to thank us, which made Levi blush and stammer.
“Never been kissed by a gay man before?” I asked, teasing him once we were alone again.
“There’s something I can check off the bucket list.”
“Just be glad he didn’t kiss you like this,” I said, stretching up on my tiptoes and sealing my lips over his.
I kept it short because today was not about the two of us. Apparently I didn’t keep it short enough. Cam caught my eye once I’d broken off the kiss, and he ground his jaw in the distance.
Behave, I mouthed at him across the living room.
Tell him to behave, he mouthed back.
I laughed and shook my head, then tucked my hand into Levi’s arm and led him off to talk to some other acquaintances from the world of figure skating.
Before long, it was time to cut the cake. A woman who was so hot she made me look like a bum came out with the aforementioned ice cream cake with chocolate-covered-bacon roses for decoration. I’d never seen anything less appealing in my life, but it was exactly what Jesse wanted—and Anthony would never deny Jesse anything if he could manage to avoid doing so.
Mia Quincey got herself into position and choreographed the two of them cutting into the cake. I blinked, and then ice cream was flying. Literally.
“Um” —I looked at Levi, wide-eyed— “ready to skedaddle?”
“It’s okay for us to sneak out early?”
Losing an Edge Page 18
