“I was worried you left,” she says.
“No.”
“How’s your head?”
“It’s still there Bella.”
She slides off the bed with the sheet covering her and comes over to me. She looks so petite when she stands next to me, especially when she lifts her head up and I have to lean forwards to kiss her forehead.
She presses her hands to my chest and gazes up at me, her eyes wanting last night again.
This woman would never know the power she has over me. I gave my reasoning to Pa not even two minutes ago and here I am wanting her all over again, forgetting all the reasons why I shouldn’t be with her.
Our lips meet when I lower to her delicious mouth and we fall into a kiss that speaks of all I want to do to her. I end up moving with her over to the bed where I sit down on the edge and she straddles my lap. The sheet falls from her and I run my hands over her bare skin, her naked body exposed and mine for the taking.
When she starts moving her hips over my cock I become hard instantly. It doesn’t take much. I feel her arousal too as her hard nipples brush over my chest. I can’t help it, I run my hands over her breasts and leave her lips to suck her tits. She moans arching her back and the movement forces more of her flesh into my mouth.
My cock is rock hard and gets harder as she starts to grind over me. I know she’s wet and ready for me to claim her pretty pussy so I slide my fingers down her body to cup her sex, eliciting a deep moan from her.
She lifts her hips so I can push my fingers into her pussy. She’s as wet as I thought she would be, her juices of need coating my fingers as I push in and out of her.
I pull out and take a break from her tits to lick off the glistening juice from my fingers. She tastes like honey and nectar. Sweet and delicious, a taste I savor in my mouth. She lifts my face to kiss me and I kiss her back, sweeping my tongue over hers as I explore her hot, wet mouth.
I’m about to shove my boxers down and fuck her more savagely than I did last night when that voice of reality creeps back in and stops me. It makes me halt, keeping me still so I can calm down.
She doesn’t stop so I have to make her. I stop kissing her, catch her wrists and set her down on the bed, lying on top of her so I can pin her down. I raise her hands above her head and hold her hands there to exert my dominance over her. She stares back at me in disbelief.
“We can’t,” I mutter and I can’t believe those words as I hear them.
“Why? Why can’t we?” she asks. She searches my eyes and I wish she wouldn’t do that.
It’s harder when she looks at me and sees my soul. I know she can. I can tell from how she responds when she looks at me that she can see how I feel. All of it. From the confliction to the love.
“We can’t Willow. Last night was… it was last night, but nothing’s changed. You’ve seen exactly why you can’t be with me.”
She closes her eyes for a brief moment and when she opens them again I see what she wants and I know it’s me.
“I love you too,” she says and I know she’s saying that in reference to what I said yesterday.
That is the first time any woman I’ve been with has ever said those words to me and meant it.
“You mustn’t,” I answer holding her wrists tighter.
“So it’s okay for you to love me and I mustn’t love you?”
“Yes. That is exactly what this will be.”
She shakes her head at me. “That’s not fair.”
“It has to be. This is how it has to be Willow. I’m leaving in a little while and I’m hoping I can give you your freedom today. That’s my hope.” It has to be today. This shit with Amadeo has gone on long enough and it’s taking me away from the bigger threat of Mario.
I know the other guys are tracking him, but with us split up the way we are we aren’t going to find him until he makes his presence known. He has Xiou taking care of him. That’s a task in itself.
I release the grip I have on her wrists and back away from her. I stand and gaze down at her beautiful body, committing her to memory. Every part of her from the way her eyes hold me in place to her goddess body of perfection.
“That’s it?” she asks and when I nod her eyes brim with tears.
“That’s it.”
“If you stop that guy from coming after us, you won’t have to worry about him anymore.”
God, I wish it was that simple. “There’s more Willow. More danger. A bigger threat I need to sort out. It won’t end with that guy. He’s just a part of the game.”
Amadeo is a pawn Mario is trying to use to kill me. That’s what this whole thing is. If I get rid of Amadeo, Mario and Xiou will just send more people after me and mine. It won’t be just Willow to worry about. I have my family. Pa, and my sisters, and their families too. I’ve been hunting Mario, but this works both ways. He’ll come for me too.
“When this is done, you will not see me again. I mean it this time,” I add. “You shouldn’t be with a guy who has to kidnap you to keep you safe.”
Her face hardens as I speak. Like Pa, she knows I’m right. Truth is truth and no one can refute it.
“I’ll allow you to call Lurlene. I know I don’t have to tell you to watch what you say to her. Understand?” I feel like a prick talking to her with such control.
She nods and covers herself.
I walk away from her and head into the shower.
This is going to be one fucking long day, but all the shit needs to end here.
I won’t live through this another day. It’s too hard. Too hard to keep picking at my heart, tearing pieces away from it then trying to patch it up again.
I love Willow and this is the case of me doing what I need to, to keep her safe.
She asked me the other day who would keep her safe from me. The answer is me.
Chapter Twenty
Willow
“Are you okay?” I ask Lurlene the second she answers the phone.
“I’m peachy sweet girl.”
“Thank God,” I say and try to hold back my relief. “I’m glad you’re okay.”
“I am but, sugar, I was starting to worry,” she replies.
“I’m sorry I worried you. Our phones haven’t worked so well where we are,” I lie.
It was Armand that brought me the phone. Donny left after his shower, which was roughly ten minutes later. I didn’t wait in the room. I dragged on my clothes and headed to the room I’m calling mine while I’m here.
“You and your phone, Willow. You do know you left your bag at the restaurant right? With the phone.” She chuckles. “That man of yours, honestly. I guess he must not want you wasting time away from him talking to your worried aunt.”
I smile but instantly the dullness over my heart comes back. “We’ve just been busy.”
“Busy?” She giggles. “In bed busy, I hope.”
“Yeah.” I decide to say. It’s not exactly a lie with the night Donny and I had last night.
She seems satisfied with that answer. “I’m not complaining. As long as he’s taking care of my girl I’m happy. I like this guy Willow and I’m happy you worked it out. You need some adventure in your life.”
Jesus. She wouldn’t know the half of it. I guess adventure includes elements of danger. I’ve had it all. Bullets flying at me, being chased by men who wanted me dead, being kidnapped and nearly drowning.
I run my hand through my hair and sit down on the edge of my bed.
“Yeah. I guess so.”
“It’s good. Trust me it’s a good thing.”
I was starting to think so too. I know it’s not just my decision, but last night as Donny took me over and over again I was starting to see myself with him. Nothing else mattered. Not the dangers or threats. Just us. Then this morning happened and broke me. It’s not the same thing as William leaving me at the altar but it’s rejection all the same.
“When are you coming back?” Lurlene asks.
“I think maybe tomorrow. We’ll see.
” I’m being as vague as I can be. I’m guessing from what Donny said it sounded like I’d be back with Lurlene soon, and have my freedom.
That was how he put it and brought the situation to light. As he’d said that I wondered if I was suffering from some sort of Stockholm’s syndrome. Then I brushed it aside because I didn’t think that you could suffer from something like that if you’d been involved with your captor prior to the taking.
And I was really involved and at the place in my heart now where it was open to him.
“Cool. But…I won’t be at home until later in the day. I have another date with Lorenzo. I’m meeting his daughters,” she says.
I find myself smiling and I welcome the distraction. “Wow, really?”
“Yeah. It’s a big deal for me… I never do this. He has two daughters and they’re both visiting from college. I’ll be meeting them for a lunch date and I guess I’ll see how I feel.”
To me it sounds promising. She really never does this. It’s more the case of her trying as much as possible to have fun with her guys and keep them at some distance while she works out what to do next in the relationship.
“I like it.”
“Well, good, because if I like the feel of tomorrow, I’m going to introduce you to him too.”
“My God, this sounds serious, Lurlene.”
“We will see sugar. This southern belle is one tough cookie to crack so we’ll definitely see. I’d love to meet your man properly too, not naked in your room.”
My cheeks flush. “Let’s focus on you right now.” I don’t have the strength to tell her that it’s really over between Donny and me. Not again.
Last time I talked about it I didn’t say much. I said enough for her to get the gist and she filled in the blanks. This time my heart is more full.
“Okay sweet girl. I’ll let you get back to your man.” She chuckles. “Speak to you later?”
“Yes, for sure.”
“Bye, bye now.”
“Bye.”
We hang up. I set the phone on the night stand and gaze out the window. I find myself doing that a lot. Just looking out to the vast expanse of the deep blue sea.
I don’t want to stay in this room again today like a petulant child who’s been sent away to wait for their punishment. Or in my case my fate. I don’t want to sink into despair either so I get up, shower for a really long time and change into a t-shirt and a pair of joggers from the stash of clothes that was left for me.
It’s all the same sort of stuff. I assume Donny must have gone into the first shop, or the most convenient and grabbed a handful of clothes. At least he got my size right. He even got my bra size right and I usually go in for a fitting. I suppose he spent enough time with my body to know what I needed.
God… what the hell am I really supposed to do? I’m like a butterfly, flittering from one emotion to the next, bouncing back and forth, except there’s been one constant the whole time no matter what I’ve felt. That’s my feelings for him. They’ve remained unchanged.
That conversation we had this morning was so intense for me. He was serious. I know how to spot things like that now. He really was serious. As much as he wanted me he fought against desire and won. I was helpless and I would have allowed him to take me again because I wanted him so much.
I set my wet hair in a ponytail and make my way downstairs. The first thing I notice is that the front door is wide open and so is the back door at the end of the long wide corridor. It leads right outside. For the first time I see the beach and it looks amazing. The beautiful weather is stunning, like last night’s storm never happened. There’s still a gentle breeze moving through the fan palm trees but nothing as vicious as the gusts that had swept through yesterday.
Drawn to it I head that way, but stop mid stride when I see the door open to the living room that was closed.
Walking in my gaze lands on a series of elegant pictures on the wall. They’re all of a woman. A very beautiful dark haired woman who looked like she just stepped out of a fairytale.
They’re all of her here at this house and by the beach. They’re at least ten of them on the wall in varying sizes. The one I like the most is the one that shows her walking toward the sea with her hair fluttering out in the wind like a cape. She’s wearing a white dress that looks stark against her sun-kissed skin.
It’s so striking for the emotion it carries. The freedom of being somewhere serene.
I look ahead to the floor to ceiling glass windows and see the path in the picture. It was there, just ahead of me.
Looking back to the pictures on the wall I see a resemblance that tells me the woman must be Donny’s mother. He looks exactly like his father, but he has his mother’s features. Her nose, the shape of her eyes and that beauty that captivates me is in her too.
I wonder what happened to her and how she died.
She seemed so gentle and peaceful, like the kind of woman that appreciated nature and landscapes the way I do.
I turn back to the scene before me and gaze out to the beach. It looks so nice from this side. Not like the parts I ventured to yesterday.
“She used to like the sea here too…” Armand says behind me, startling me.
I bring my hand to my chest and wince.
“Sorry Bellissima, I did not mean to startle you,” he adds.
“It’s okay. I…” my voice trails off as I suddenly realize this might look like I’m snooping around and possibly trying to escape again. “I wasn’t trying to leave again. I promise.”
He smiles and raises the bag he carries. I just noticed it. “Willow, if I thought you’d be heading out again today the doors would be locked up tight like they have been. That was to keep you safe. Opening up the place is to show you that you are not a prisoner here. I thought you’d feel less trapped.”
I smile at that. “Thank you. That means a lot.”
“This is for you,” he says holding up the bag. It’s big and wide.
“Me?” I say pointing to myself. I have no idea what it could be.
“Yeah. When Donny first asked me to look after you I didn’t know what to do. I got this as an ice breaker. It seems like the right time to give it to you.”
I take it and I find myself grinning ear to ear when I see what’s inside. It’s a canvas and an oil paint set with some of the brushes I love using. Those brushes alone cost a pretty penny.
“Oh my gosh,” I gasp and hug him to his surprise. “Thank you so much.”
I’m surprised too because I didn’t realize how much I missed being able to paint. I’ve had so much on my mind that I’d pushed it to the back.
He laughs when I release him and taps my cheek. “Bella, if I had known I could have calmed you like this I would have brought this out a long time ago.”
I smile at him. “This is perfect. It’s the right time. I’m happy to get it now.”
“Good, that makes me happy.” He looks back to the pictures on the wall and smiles. “I took those pictures.”
“They’re beautiful.”
“Thank you. I’m no photographer but Evelyn had this way about her when she was here that just made me want to capture it.”
I love listening to him talk about his wife. Again I wonder how she died. “I see what you mean. I like that one.” I point to the picture I was admiring earlier.
He grins and nods. “That is my favorite too. I took that on our eighteenth wedding anniversary.”
“Wow.”
“We used to come here every summer with our kids. It was a house we stayed in when I had business in these parts. Then it became our holiday home. Donny loved it as much as his mother did. So I gave it to him and I gave him those pictures too. I had enough of them to spare. They seemed to suit the place.”
“I love it.”
“Good, well I’m pretty certain there’s something we can use for an easel of sorts so maybe you can paint on the beach if you’d like. You can see the better parts of the beach.” He quirks a brow. “The par
ts that you’re meant to enjoy.”
I bite the inside of my lip. “I’d love that.”
“Head out and I’ll make us some lemonade. We’ll have a nice big lunch today I think.”
“That sounds great. I’d like to help.”
“We can cook together then. It’ll be beef lasagna.”
“Thanks. That sounds delicious.”
“Go on now, let’s enjoy the weather while it’s like this.” He points outside and gives me a smile.
“Okay.”
He gives me a reassuring smile as I go.
I can see he’s trying to distract me and calm me down all at the same time. I’m also sure too that he must know the situation between me and Donny. It hasn’t escaped me that Donny seems to really trust his father. Since we’ve been here it’s just been us. I’m almost certain he would have spoken to his father about us. So maybe Armand’s trying to make me feel better about that too.
Whatever it is, it’s a distraction for me. I wish that I could just think about getting back to my life, but I can’t do that so easily.
I thought I was in love when I was with William. Having met Donny in this short space of time I know now that whatever I felt for William was nothing.
Chapter Twenty-One
Donny
Alex looks me over with concern as I park up by the side of the cave. I got my bike today. It’s faster and will get me out of trouble much quicker than my car.
This is where we’re meeting to launch our attack. A quarter mile away from Amadeo’s house.
What played out is exactly what I preempted. The fucker returned to the nest bright and early this morning. I was already on the way back to the city when Alex messaged with the update and the plan.
“How you doing man?” Alex asks, wincing as he looks at the cut on my head.
“I’m fine, you should have seen it yesterday. Where are the others?”
“Getting ready.” He motions toward the other side of the cave.
“Perfect.”
He nods agreeing. “We’ve had eyes on the house since Amadeo popped back on the radar. He’s inside and there’s more guards, we have enough men here to back us up, and snipers to clear the path, but we’ll need to be careful.”
The Sting of Love: A Mafia Romance (Gangsters and Dolls Book 5) Page 17
