by Caitlyn Dare
Coming to stop at an intersection, I release the wheel and tug my jeans down a little to relieve the pressure, refusing to release her small hand that's clamped in my other. I'm not letting her run again. Our time isn't over yet.
She giggles beside me, and when I turn to look at her, I find the most incredible sight. Her smile.
"I'm glad you find this amusing."
She shrugs. "You've only got yourself to blame."
"How'd you figure that? I didn't make you come out dressed like that."
"No, but you kissed Aimee. You think I wanted to be grinding up against Aaron?" She slams her lips shut the second she realizes she just said those words out loud. "Shit."
"Were you playing me, K?"
"More like giving you a taste of your own medicine."
"You told me you didn't want me. I'm free to kiss whoever I damn well please."
"Oh really?" Her eyebrows shoot up in shock.
"Yeah. I'll go back now and continue what we started if you like. I know she was up for it, she purred like a fucking kitten when I pushed my tongue into her—"
"Stop. Just stop, okay?"
"Why? Jealous?"
She silently fumes beside me, attempting to tug her hand from mine so she can turn her back on me, but she's unsuccessful.
Tension crackles around us for long minutes as she stares out the window and I smirk to myself. If she wants me to believe her when she says that there's nothing between us, then she needs to start acting like it as well.
"You missed the turn," she snaps, still refusing to look at me.
"No, I didn't."
"But dorms are... I'm not going back to the party, Conner. Not after the way you—"
"We're going to mine."
"What? No, we're not—"
"Quit arguing, K."
"But..." she huffs.
"You're not running from me tonight, and you're not hiding in your dorm. I dragged you out of that party to talk, so that's what we're gonna do."
"We're gonna talk. In your... bedroom?" Finally, she turns to look at me. Fire burns brightly in her eyes, but I'm pretty sure it's not anger about me kidnapping her. There's only heat staring back at me.
"Tell me what you want, K."
"I... I don't want to talk, Con."
"Fuck," I groan, pushing my accelerator lower and forcing the car to jolt forward.
The second the car comes to a stop outside our house, I'm out and pulling her door open.
"Come on." Reaching inside, I take her hand and all but drag her up to my room, I only pause to swipe a bottle from James' constantly stocked liquor cabinet. It's like he wants us to get shit-faced. Not that I'm about to argue.
She happily trails behind me until she's in my room. Then she grinds to a halt with her muscles pulled tight.
"What's wrong?"
She shakes her head. "N-nothing." Her fear-filled eyes are locked on my bed, and I swallow down my disappointment that she's about to turn and run.
"K?" I whisper, stepping in front of her and cupping her cheek in my hand.
She still refuses to look at me, so I lower down a little and find her eyes myself. I gasp when I find them full of unshed tears and pain.
"Talk to me, K. Please," I beg.
"I-I can't." She steps back from my hold and I suck in a breath as I prepare to watch her run through the door and away from me. Only that's not what she does. Instead, she rips the bottle from my hand and twists the cap.
I watch with concern as she swallows large mouthfuls as if it's water. It's like watching Cole when he’s in one of his dark periods.
"Okay, I think that's enough," I say, taking the bottle back and tipping it to my own lips before placing it on the nightstand by my bed.
"This room," she breathes, her voice cracking with emotion. "The last time I was in this room I was..."
"It's okay, you don't have to talk. We can just hang out, watch a movie?" I suggest, even though it pains me to do so.
Kenny laughs, although it holds no happiness. "I don't want to watch a movie, Con." She glances up at me from under her lashes. She looks so vulnerable, so scared that it totally disarms me.
"You're going to need to... I don't want to as—" My words are cut off by her lips and turn into a low groan of approval as her tongue finds its way into my mouth to search out my own.
My fingers slide into her hair, allowing me to deepen the kiss and take everything I've been craving since the second I pulled her into my arms the morning Jay turned up with her on my doorstep.
"Kenny," I moan against her lips as I spin around and walk her backward toward my bed.
The second her legs hit the mattress, I lower her down, crawling over her body so I don't break the kiss.
Her hands slip under my shirt. My entire body shivers with her burning touch before she drags it up my body. Reaching behind me, I grab onto the back and pull it off, only leaving her lips for the briefest of moments so the fabric can pass.
"Fuck, do you know how long I've waited for this?" I whisper against the bruised skin of her neck, before licking over the spot.
"Conner," she warns, and I once again prepare myself for her to put a stop to this. My body tenses, ready to fall down beside her and watch her leave. But that's not what she's thinking. "If you're going to try to make love to me then I'll go back and find Aaron." Hearing her mutter his name while she's beneath me on my bed makes something snap inside me.
"Aaron? You want fucking Aaron right now?" I ask, sitting up as the anger I felt watching him with his hands on her floods back.
"No, Conner. I want you. I want you to fuck me so hard I don't even know my own name. But if you can't manage that because you want to whisper sweet fucking nothings in my ear, then I'll just..." She pushes up on her elbows as if she's about to crawl out from under me, but she doesn't get the chance.
My fingers wrap around her throat and I push until she has no choice but to fall back onto the mattress.
Her eyes widen in shock but darken with desire until the hazel is replaced by black.
With my hand still holding her captive, I reach for the bottle and down two shots. I don't need to look at her to know she's watching my every move. My skin burns wherever her eyes land.
I take another shot in my mouth, but I don't swallow this time. Instead, I fold back over her, press my lips to hers and let her take it from me. I lick across her cheek and down her neck, where it spills over, before sinking my teeth into her soft flesh.
"Yes," she cries out.
"You want me to fuck you like I hate you, K?" My eyes meet hers and an understanding passes between us. She knows I'd never deny her of anything she needs. She nods just once to confirm before I wrap my hands around her small top and rip it from her body.
My mouth drops to one of her breasts as I settle myself between her thighs. My hand slides up to her hip, pushing her skirt up and pinning her to the bed with an unforgiving grip.
I suck, bite and lick at her breasts until she's crying out my name and writhing beneath me. Her nails claw at my back with such force I start to wonder if she's drawing blood.
"Conner, more. I need more."
Reaching for the bottle once more, I finish what's left—much to her frustration—but I don't let it bother me. She wants me to show her just how fucking angry I am at her for avoiding me since she arrived, then she's going to fucking get it.
Her skirt and panties are gone in seconds and thrown somewhere across the room before I wrap my hands around her thighs and push them as wide as they'll go.
"Conner," she cries out, attempting to move in my grip, but I'm having none of it.
"Don't ask for more than you can handle, babe," I taunt before diving for her pussy.
I lick from her entrance all the way up to her clit and circle it.
"Oh fuck. Fuck. Fuck," she screams. A smile pulls at my lips at her reaction.
Her fingers twist in my hair, and the longer I tease her, the more I think she's going to rip it from my scalp, but eve
n the pain that shoots down my spine from her frustration isn't enough to allow her to fall over the edge. Every time I sense her get close, I pull away and change the speed or the pressure.
"You're a fucking asshole, Conner," she screams when I pull back once more. "Conner," she cries as I sink my teeth into the flesh on her thigh and suck hard, branding her, marking her. Once I'm happy it'll last a while, I push from the bed and stand at the end.
I run my eyes up her body. Her skin is covered in a sheen of sweat, and her chest is heaving. She's got marks all over her neck, chest and thighs from both my mouth and fingertips, and I fucking love it.
If any other fucker manages to get anywhere near her, he's going to know she belongs to someone. Just a shame I can't put my actual fucking name on her.
Mine.
"Conner?" Her voice is weaker than just a few moments ago. Does she really think I'd be able to stop right now even if I wanted to?
My hands drop to my waistband and I eagerly push the fabric from my hips while toeing off my shoes.
I don't miss her gasp when she gets a look at me. It's been a few months since she's seen me like this and I've gained a few tats—much like she has—and added a few pounds of muscle.
Wrapping my hand around my length, I tug a few times as we stare at each other.
"Hands and knees," I demand, my voice deep and rough. I barely recognize it. In reality, I don't want her turning away from me, but the risk of kissing her once again and this turning into something she doesn't want is simmering right there on the surface.
I want to tell her how much I've missed her, how much I've needed her. How much I fucking love her. But I can't. I understand her need for actions over words, so I just need to make sure she feels every fucking thing I want to tell her with every thrust of my hips.
She flips over immediately and lifts her ass for me.
"Fuck, you look good like that."
I climb on the bed behind her, still with myself in hand, and run the head through her wetness. When I get to her entrance, her muscles try to drag me in.
"Greedy girl," I mutter, before my palm connects with her ass.
"Fuuuck," she cries out as I soothe the sting with a gentle caress.
"Regretting rejecting me yet?"
"Fuck no. Give me everything you've got."
Unable to deny her, I thrust and fill her to the hilt. She surges forward, her head slamming against the headboard as my cock teases her cervix.
"Yes, Conner. Fuck me. Fuck me until none of this exists."
And so I do.
Over and over.
Chapter Fifteen
Kennedy
I wake with a start. A wall of heat is plastered behind me and an arm is slung possessively over my hip. I lie there, still and unmoving, trying to catch my breath.
It’s just Conner.
But that’s the problem. I’m at the Jaggers’, in Conner’s bed, with him holding me like I’m the most precious thing in the world.
Emotion rushes up my throat and I swallow it down, blinking away the tears I feel collecting behind my eyes.
We spent the night wrapped up in each other. He was insatiable. It was like he couldn’t stand not touching me. Even when our bodies were exhausted, Conner still reached for me and made me come around his fingers as he stared deeply into my eyes.
It had been intense.
He was intense.
Then we’d fallen asleep without talking. I knew Conner wanted to say things, things I wasn’t ready to hear. But he’d respected my wish to not talk.
And now I was here, wrapped in his arms as if everything was okay.
Gingerly, I lift his arm off me and slide out of the bed. My body aches but in the best kind of way. Sometimes, with Warren, I wouldn’t be able to move the next day. But it never felt good.
Conner stirs behind me and I freeze, holding my breath, waiting for him to settle back down. He does, so I tiptoe around his room, pulling on one of his t-shirts. It’s early, a little after seven, but I need to get out of here.
It burns through me like acid. If I’m here when Conner wakes, he’ll want to talk. He’ll want to make this a big deal, and it can’t be. Because although I don’t regret what happened between us last night, I know he’ll want more than I can give him.
I gather up what’s left of my clothes and pull on what I can. It’s early, hopefully no one will be up because I’m not sure I can handle all the questions.
Glancing back at Conner one last time, I imprint the image of him sleeping. He looks so peaceful it cracks something inside me. This is what my life could have been. Waking up loved and cherished, safe and protected. Conner always made me feel so special. It was him and me against the world.
Until everything changed.
We’d had this stupid pact. I’d made him promise that if I hadn’t lost my virginity by the time I turned seventeen, he would be the one to take it. It had been the best night of my life. He’d been so gentle with me, treating me like fragile glass... until my body stretched and got used to him. Conner had spent one whole night loving me, tracing every inch of my skin with his fingers and tongue. At one point, I was sure I’d died and gone to heaven because nothing could feel that good.
Yet, with Conner, it did.
But it had freaked us both out a little. Being with him was so easy, as easy as breathing. Sex changed our friendship. It wasn’t supposed to, but it did. Conner grew awkward around me and I didn’t know how to tell him that I wanted more.
I hadn’t expected Warren to announce he was into me. He and Conner were good friends, and it was weird. I thought if I just got a little closer to him, Conner would get jealous and claim me as his own.
He didn’t.
He stepped aside and let Warren pursue me. I was devastated. I thought we’d shared something special, and Conner just handed me over to Warren like it meant nothing.
Tears prick my eyes as I stand there, watching the boy I’ve loved since I was a child, sleep. Things could have been so much different after that night. Our friendship could have grown and flourished into so much more.
But Conner didn’t want me. He didn’t fight for me or claim me. He simply stood by and let Warren take me as his own.
He condemned me to months of hell.
I can’t just forget that.
I won’t.
Slipping into the hall, I duck into the bathroom and try to clean myself up. My skin is flushed and my hair is a mess. There are bite marks and hickeys dotted over my neck, and when I lift Conner’s t-shirt and inspect my body, I wince at the bruise marks all over my hips and thighs.
Conner didn’t do anything I didn’t ask for. I wanted this. I needed it. His touch, no matter how rough, will always be twenty times softer than Warren’s.
Splashing some water on my face, I clean off the make-up and finger brush my teeth with some toothpaste. When I pee it stings a little, but it’s nothing compared to what I’m used to.
The house is still quiet when I slip back into the hall. The prospect of the twenty-five minute walk back to campus doesn’t fill me with excitement, but it’s better than staying here and doing the awkward morning after thing.
I reach the stairs just as a door creaks open. Fear trickles down my spine as I try to press myself into the wall.
“Sneaking out?” Cole’s voice is cool.
“I...” Words fail me.
“Sounded like you and my brother made your peace last night.” His brow arches.
My body heats at his words, and I smother the whimper in my throat.
Cole heard us.
Of course he did. I wasn’t exactly quiet.
“I just need some time... to think.”
“A little late for that, isn’t it?” Cole is pissed. And I get it. He and Conner are twins. He’s protective of his brother.
“I’m just going to go.” I start hurrying down the stairs.
“Kenny, wait.”
I glance back at the softness in his tone.
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“I’ll give you a ride. Just let me grab some clothes.”
I want to tell him no, that I don’t need his charity. But the alternative is doing the walk of shame through their rich neighborhood.
“Fine,” I say.
“Meet me outside, at the car.”
“You won’t tell him?”
“No.” Cole’s jaw clenches. “But you and I are going to have a little talk.”
The air in Cole’s car is thick and heavy as he backs out of the Jaggers’ huge driveway.
“You hungry?” He eyes my bare legs poking out of Conner’s oversized t-shirt.
“I’m okay, thanks.” I just want to get back to my dorm room and sleep off the bad decisions and reckless mistakes I seem to keep making.
“Conner will kick my ass if I don’t feed you.”
“Cole, honestly, I’m not—”
“Just humor me.”
Cole hits a drive thru and gets us breakfast. I pick at my bagel while he devours a wrap.
“Thanks,” I say, licking my fingers.
“What happened with Warren, Kenny?”
I inhale a sharp breath. “I...”
“Look, we all know that piece of shit hurt you. But what I can’t quite figure out is if it’s been going on for a while. And if it has, why didn't you call Conner?”
Disbelief coats my laughter. “I get that you’re Conner’s brother, Cole, but seriously? Go fuck yourself.” I turn to the window, wishing I could escape.
The car grows small around me. I’m so tired of everyone assuming they know what happened or thinking that I should have asked for help.
I had no one.
After Conner left and my aunt died, Warren was the only person I had, and he’d done a stellar job of making sure I had nowhere else to turn.
“Shit, Ken, I didn’t mean... fuck.” Cole’s hand collides with the steering wheel, making me flinch.
“It’s okay,” I sigh, sliding my eyes to his. “I know you care about him.”
“And he cares about you. It’s always been you, Kenny. He’d kick my ass for telling you this, but Conner hasn’t looked twice at any girl since we got here.”
The air whooshes from my lungs. Cole is staring at me like I’ve lost my mind, but I’m stuck on the part where Conner hasn’t been with anyone else.
