by Scott, Raven
“Mateo happened. I was just the first person he saw.” Her voice shook wildly, and I scowled darkly as she took a rattling sigh. “I’m taking a few days off— let him know. He won’t try anything with you, Theo.”
“Oh, I’ll let him know, alright.” There was a reason Mateo paid his employees an obscene amount of money, after all— to Julie and her mopping floors that weren’t dirty. “Did Mateo lash out at anyone else?”
“He’s been upset all day. He locked himself in his room. That poor girl— she needs a doctor. She’s not doing okay.” Only grunting at that, I shuffled back and opened the door for her just to make sure Julie got outside and to her car alright. “I’ll see you later, Theo.”
Glancing around, my eyes narrowed into tight points, and my stubble bristled at the utter lack of security. Normally, Mateo had two or three bodyguards inside his house, more if I wasn’t around. They were nowhere to be seen, and yet, Julie was lingering around despite getting off at ten p.m. She must’ve been hiding or something— or waiting for me, so she didn’t get caught by Mateo again.
Only when Julie got in her car and was out of the driveway did I shut and lock the door again, and I turned on my heel to storm toward the stairs. All the fury I’d suppressed today came welling up to the surface, and I clenched and released my fist by my side. My gut rotted as the silence rang in my ears, broken only by my heavy footfall and hot, harsh pants.
I was getting sick and fucking tired of Mateo, and being around Illya, well, I’d gotten a taste of the good life. Why would I be okay continuing to settle with this asshole that couldn’t tie his own fucking shoes?
“Mateo!” Exhaling fire as I headed down the hall, my irritated bellow echoed through the house, and a faint thump sounded in reply. I stopped in front of his door only to tense, and I unceremoniously kicked open the barrier as hard as I could. The wood splintered and flew as the lock busted through the frame, and the knob sailed across the room right into Mateo’s computer screen.
Really, I may be his bodyguard, and he may be a criminal— no matter how ineffectual— but I had some loose morals. Hitting anyone that hadn’t done shit to deserve it was one of them.
My narrowed vision tinged red as I glanced around, and Mateo stood at the foot of his king-sized bed, trying to size me up. He didn’t work out. He didn’t go to the range. He didn’t do anything that made him even slightly capable of dealing with me, bum hand or not. Grinding my teeth, my lip curled in a snarl, and he blanched despite the strangely blank look on his pretty-boy face.
“You were supposed to be back hours ago with the roommate.” I didn’t know what the fuck possessed Mateo to open his mouth, but something in my brain switched off. Stalking across the room, I clenched my fist tight and sent it sailing for his nose. My jab was too fast for him to follow. He let out a girly squeal and crumpled like wax paper with a hard thud, and my toes curled in my shoes with the urge to kick him.
“Let’s get one fucking thing clear . . . kid!” Grabbing Mateo by his silky soft, prized hair, I jerked his head back and bent to glare at him. “I’m not your fucking errand boy. I’m not obligated to come when you call like some fucking dog. I don’t have to do fucking shit for you but keep you from dying, and right now, you’re fucking pushing it.”
Snarling nastily, spittle flew into Mateo’s face, and a primitive satisfaction blazed across my chest when he flinched. He paled, his lips thinning, and uncertainty flashed in his eyes as they widened in the reflection of a lamp on his desk.
“We’re not fucking friends. You’re a spoiled bitch, and I’m babysitting you for a fortune. Don’t ever expect me to do anything else.” Throwing Mateo on the floor, I straightened to wipe my hand on my jeans with a disgusted sound. “And . . . if you ever hit Julie again, I’ll cut your hand off. Trust me, it’s not a pleasant experience.”
Just like a child, I took Mateo’s door privileges away, and I closed my eyes to take a few deep breaths. I shouldn’t have left Illya. My eyelid twitched in agitation as the thought flashed behind my eyes, and I strode out of the room and across the hall into my own. Leaning against the door, I rubbed my face and neck harshly, and my knuckles ached ever so slightly.
That was the problem with rich kids— they thought everyone was obligated to serve them in every way because they had money. Mateo paid me, so what right did I have to deny him? At this moment, I’d bet all the money in my wallet that he was thinking exactly that, and a sudden wash of icy cold swept down my torso.
I had no money in my wallet— Illya took it all last night before I drove her home.
“Jesus Christ.” Recently, I’d made a lot of threats to Mateo, and I was fucking itching to make good on them. For some reason, he was pissing me off more than usual, and it was sticking to me worse. Maybe, it was meeting Illya and seeing how much she struggled that made me so intolerant of Mateo. “Shit.”
Blowing out a hot breath, I shook my head viciously and rolled my shoulders in a semi-successful attempt to ease the tension in my body. The heat in my chest died down, and I walked over to my bed to sit down and kick off my shoes.
“Hopefully, that bitch won’t scream the second I close my eyes.” Sylvie must’ve been passed out from the effects of her withdrawal— if she was even going through it yet. Rubbing my face, I laid back on my bed with my legs dangling off the end, and the ceiling swirled mesmerizingly. “What a way to end the day.”
When I closed my eyes, I could see Illya’s face after she got out of the bath with crystal clarity. She looked so happy, smiling almost ear to ear with a little pep in her step. I didn’t know a simple bath could make someone so damn happy. I’d asked if she liked it, and she hit me with one of those phrases that started off great and just ended in a blazing dumpster fire. She was so relaxed— but I haven’t taken a bath since before my parents died, only showers.
What the actual fuck? How much did her life have to suck that she couldn’t enjoy something so mundane?
Glancing around through unfocused eyes, I realized my bedroom here was bigger than her entire apartment. Frowning darkly, I held up my mangled hand and clenched my jaw.
“I really don’t have it bad, do I?” Which was, frankly, dumb as fuck because I had told Illya that she shouldn’t feel invalidated by people who had it worse or better than her. “Shit.”
Flopping my arm down, I exhaled a heavy breath as the day’s events flickered through my mind’s eye like a movie reel being sped up. Illya was lost, and I was generally fucking stupid and didn’t know how to help her up to this point. No wonder she went back and forth the way she did.
20
Illya
“Theo.” Leaning on the door frame, Theo smirked at me, and I pursed my lips thinly as I hid my hand behind the door. “What’s up? I have to go to work in a little while.”
“I came by to see if you were hungry. It worked out pretty well before, so I thought I’d try again.” Surprise rose my brows, and I tightened my grip on the can in my hand as he scanned me through narrowed eyes. “You haven’t dyed your hair yet.”
“Um . . . not yet. I was just about to start.” Rocking back on my heels when Theo leaned toward me, I held my breath, and suspicion flitted across his expression. “It’s a bit of a process, so . . . ”
Trailing off, I saw the exact second he decided something was up, and Theo leaned in uncomfortably close to my neck and sniffed. His narrowed pupils tightened, and the can in my hand started to cramp my palm even as I flexed my fingers around it.
“Why are you nervous?” Without letting me take a breath in preparation, Theo shouldered past me, and I shut the door quickly to lean against it. The spoon in my can rattled slightly, and my heart jumped into my throat when he braced both his palms on either side of my head. “What are you hiding?”
The fine hairs on the back of my neck stood up as he scanned me again, slowly, and I clamped my mouth shut. I got the sense Theo didn’t think something stupid— like I had a guy in my apartment— but he knew something was up.
Reaching down to grab my wrist, he squeezed almost threateningly, and that action sucked the fight from me.
Blustering out a sigh, I unveiled the can from behind my back, and Theo tensed as embarrassment engulfed my face in flames. The little can burned my palm, and I ducked my head as confusion welled up in my chest. Why was I ashamed? I wasn’t doing anything wrong.
“I— is that . . . cat food? Were you eating that?” Disgust roughened Theo’s tone, and I nodded dully as his muscles played under his shirt out of the top of my field of vision. He recoiled with a harsh grunt, and shock jolted through me when he smacked the can out of my hand. The metal and plastic clattered to the floor loud and abrasive, and I gasped when he wrapped his good hand in my hair.
Suddenly, his finger was in my mouth, and my stomach flipped when Theo held down my tongue. Gagging harshly, tears sprung to my eyes, but he just held down my head until my teeth banged against his single, lonely knuckle. Slapping at his chest, panic fueled my racing heart, and I arched sharply when bile sloshed up my throat.
I’d nearly finished that can, and it all came spewing out onto the floor as weakness shook my knees. Saliva dribbled from my mouth, a dazed sort of panic gripping my lungs in a vice, and the sounds of my gagging filled my apartment. Theo ripped his hand from down my throat, and I grappled his t-shirt as I threw up on his shoes.
“That’s fucking disgusting!” His gruff snarl rippled across my hallowed face, and I pushed him hard enough to knock myself back. Hitting the floor hard, my scalp ached from his grip, and I scooted back as my watery eyes wandered until they met his. His gaze shimmered with conviction and disgust and all manner of nasty things, and I hiccupped as he ran his good hand over his head in agitation. “What the fuck, Illya!”
Theo took a step toward me, and I whipped over to crawl toward the bathroom as harsh pants dried my throat. Whimpering pathetically, I tried to wrap my head around what just happened as I slammed the door shut and blocked it with my body. Suddenly, I was kinda glad that my bathroom was small, and I braced myself against the door with my feet flat against the low rim of the shower.
“Illya, open the damn door.”
“No!” Covering my face with violently trembling hands, I croaked out from beneath my palms, and he banged on the door hard. My heart stuttered with each impact, and my breath hitched at the notion that he could just kick the barrier in. “S-stop . . . stop . . . why would you do that?”
He really just made me throw up. It didn’t even really hurt despite the acid gnawing through my throat. My rasp was met with silence, and I struggled to fill my lungs as my heart gorged on adrenaline. Tears ran in rivers down my face and between my fingers, and I shivered against the door as short, hot breaths whistled through chattering teeth.
“The fuck kind of question is that? You were eating cat food! What the fuck is wrong with you, Illya!” Theo punched the door, but his words hurt more than the rattling of my spine from the impact. “Why the fuck would you do that, huh? Open the damn door!”
Why would I do that? Because I was hungry, and I had no food in my house, and I didn’t want to buy anything. I simply didn’t have money this week, but I did have cat food because they were twenty cents a can. Two or three, here and there, wasn’t a huge deal, and they held me over when I was in a pinch.
Plus, I’d been eating them for a long enough time that it tasted good— not just not bad. When I had nothing else, I could always, always, afford a can of cat food.
“Go away, Theo. I’m not coming out.” My shaky declaration only earned the poor door another punch, and I winced when my knee bent awkwardly from the pressure. There was no lock— I had to use my whole body to keep the barrier closed, and I sniffled hard from behind my hands. I hadn’t seen Theo in a few days. I’d assumed that he was dealing with Mateo and Sylvie, and I just went about my business as usual.
But I was not making good tips by any means right now. I couldn’t do anything about it, either. Roge didn’t pay us or give out small loans or I-O-Us. If there was a lull, we had to suck it up and deal.
“Open the God damn door, Illya.” Growling through the slight gap between the door and the frame, Theo cleared his throat roughly, expectantly. I didn’t move, didn’t dare take a breath, and he snorted like a bull waiting to be let out of the stall and wreak havoc. “Open the door, Illya.”
“N-no . . . I’m not coming out.” Gulping harshly, I exhaled a shuddering breath, and I could hear Theo pacing just beyond the door. “Go away. J-just go away.”
“Like fuck!” My heart made a bid to burst from my chest when Theo banged on the door— higher, this time, far above my head. Wincing as he panted through the crack, I lowered my hands to keep my rib from splitting open. “Why did you just tell me you were strapped for cash? I would’ve helped you out, Illya.”
“Why would you?” Bitterness dribbled from my tongue, and an ugly, black blotch slathered along my ribs. “This is my life, Theo. You can’t just walk up and bang on it, and it’ll start working right.”
“It works for everything else.” Grinding the reply through his teeth, Theo exhaled a muffled, heavy breath through the crack in the door, and I flopped my head back to rub my clammy palms on my jeans. “Just . . . open the door. We’ll get you real— human— food, Illya.”
Despite my better judgment, the block I’d made of my own body to keep the barrier closed crumpled, and I pulled my knees to my chin. The tender skin on my sides pulled and burned, and my eyelids fluttered closed briefly as I gulped down the saliva pooling under my tongue. Slowly standing up, I licked my lips as nerves tingled to the bridge of my nose.
Theo leaned on the frame when I popped open the barrier just an inch, and he glared hotly at me as his jaw worked. Reaching to wipe my mouth, I frowned into the deafening silence before he forced his mouth open with a slight, faint pop.
“Do you think I’d hang it over you or something?” I shook my head mutely, and Theo sighed harshly through flared nostrils to bristle the fine hairs on my face. “Why would you resort to eating cat food instead of asking me for help?”
“Cat food is cheap, and, to be honest, I’ve been eating it so long that it’s pretty good, actually. I don’t do it a lot, but when I’m in a pinch.” He covered his mouth at my confession, rocking back on his heels to brandish his tense shoulders. The thick ropes of muscle in his arm rippled with power, and my heart throbbed at the tortured glint in his eye.
“Why are you worried about money?”
“I have to pay for everything by myself. The third is coming up, and Sylvie’s not exactly gonna pay her half this month.” The truth was that I’d been so caught in that drama, and with Theo, that I’d lost track of the days. I’d missed three days of work, and I was going to be short on rent by a good two hundred dollars. Thankfully, my electric bill was barely seventy-five dollars, and I didn’t have anything else, really, but that minimalism didn’t help my astronomical rent. “My rent is twelve hundred dollars for this place, and I don’t have it. That’s why I’m going to work early, too.”
“You pay twelve hundred dollars to live in this shitstain? What the fuck, Illya?” Theo’s anger peaked again, and I pursed my lips thinly as he squeezed his eyes shut and took a stabilizing breath. Physical pain flickered across his face, and he cleared his throat roughly before rolling his shoulders hard. “Get ready for work. I’ll order you something. For fuck’s sake. And use mouthwash.”
21
Illya
Hovering over Theo’s lap, I jiggled my ass as he sat back on braced arms, and my back bristled under my clothes from the intensity of his stare. The light skirt attached to my leotard ticked my upper thighs, and I glanced back just as he reached his right hand out. A callous, meaty palm slid heavily up my back, following my spine, and I shivered deliciously from the faint friction.
“I’m pretty sure this ass is worth more than a pizza, Illya.” He wasn’t complaining, though, and I hummed softly in acknowledgment. “Have you thought about moving?”
“Not yet.” Things had calmed down, at least, and Theo grunted at my reply before I plopped in his lap to grind against the bulge in his jeans. “What about you and Mateo?”
“He’s avoiding me because I punched him in the face. I’d say it’s going pretty alright. He won’t leave his room— which is stupid, because I broke the door when I busted it down.” A tickle of amusement swept through me, and I smiled a little at the image of a grown-ass man acting like that. He has it bad. Rich kids were the worst. Of course, there were exceptions to that rule, but on the whole. . . “I’m supposed to watch him, make sure he doesn’t die, and he treats me like I’m at his beck and call just because he pays me an obscene amount of money. Life doesn’t work like that. If Mateo wasn’t shoved into the corner, he’d probably create the largest dumpster fire ever.”
“Have you ever thought of quitting? Is it really worth it?” Straightening against my back, Theo inhaled deeply against my shoulder, and goosebumps pocked down my arm. “All you do is complain about him.”
“Nah, I get paid a lot, as I’ve said.” Chapped lips brushed the base of my neck, and I gasped as Theo pushed my dyed, pink hair out of the way. His voice roughened, tone deepening, and his left hand worked under me to squeeze my ass cheek. “I get my own car, and I get to live in a nice place, expense-free. The benefits outweigh the fact that, occasionally, I gotta break his nose.”
Humming a crackling sound as my eyelids fluttered closed, I enjoyed the hardness and heat against my back, and Theo grazed his teeth against my neck. Beneath my leotard and the thick bandages covering my torso, my skin twitched and pulled taut with desire, and I flopped my head back to groan faintly. His bulge pressed insistently against my core, and he swiped his fingers up my crotch to circle my clit outside of my stockings.
