“Yeah,” I scoffed. “We do have problems with authority, don’t we? Even when it’s from the gods and goddesses.”
Cal and I were silent for a few minutes, taking in the distinct noises of the forest. Crickets chirped a loud, mesmerizing tune through the crackling of limbs and the sound of leaves blowing in the wind.
“Do you love him?” Cal’s blunt words wretched my gaze to him.
“Who? Torin?”
Cal tilted his head. “No.”
My first reaction was to agree, but then fear held me back—to even hint it. I let out a long breath, hitting my head back against the trunk of the tree.
“Following duty or what you think is right will only hurt you in the end. There is a reason life stepped in with you, even though it came in a form of a dickhead Dark Dweller.”
“Ahhh.” I dug my face into my hands. “What is wrong with me? I really am messed up, huh?”
“Definitely.” Cal patted my knee. “But I still stand by my words. You can’t choose who you love; it chooses you.”
“When did you get so wise on love?” I asked. “Were you ever in love?”
Cal shifted on my knee with a faraway, and a sad look enveloped his features. When he noticed I was still staring at him, he cleared his throat. “Uh, once a long time ago. Didn’t end well.” He shook his head and laughed. “What a team we are.”
“I think we’re a good team.” I leaned forward and lightly kissed his cheek.
He flushed deep red. “Now you only owe me one.”
“Consider it a freebie.”
A loud crunch from the woods had both Cal and me turn to high alert. He flew off my knee when I stood. It was nearly impossible for outsiders to get in, but I still was watchful. Alki had beaten awareness into me. It wasn’t Eli who I felt. It wasn’t any of the Dark Dwellers as they were silent on approach. This was a human.
A tall, skinny outline advanced from the trees.
“Josh?”
“Hey, Ember.”
I rushed to him, throwing my arms around him, but he stiffened under my embrace. Josh didn’t push away, but he didn’t return my hug either. The poor kid had been through so much, and I had been an awful friend to him since his arrival.
“I am glad you are here with us.” I stepped closer. “Josh, I’m sorry. I have been so consumed with Torin I haven’t even talked to you. How are you? Where are you sleeping? Do you need anything?”
He looked away. “I’m fine. They gave me some guy named Dominic’s room. It’s next to Torin’s.”
I nodded. “I am so sorry I dragged you into this and got you involved with my screwed up life.”
His forehead creased. “Why? You don’t think I should be a part of this?”
Confusion wrinkled my forehead. “No, that’s not what I meant at all.”
“Is it because I am human or because you still think of me as wimpy, pathetic Josh?”
“What?” I floundered. “I don’t define you by any of those terms.”
“Because I can help. I want to fight against the Queen... for what she did.”
My stomach dropped. “What did she do to you?”
“She actually didn’t do anything, but she stood and watched as her men beat me up.”
“She didn’t touch you?”
“No, but queens never do their own dirty work, do they?” He shrugged, seeming to miss my meaning. “But it’s not like I’ve met too many of them. Well, I’ve met a lot of queens on the street, but not royal ones.” A smile formed on his mouth.
There was a taste of Josh’s playful personality, the one I had known in Silverwood. He had changed, but how could he not have? His world had been completely taken out from under him. I missed my friend, the happy-go-lucky kid who I knew back at school. Hopefully, I hadn’t destroyed him also, and he would rebound with time. Josh had a bad temper and a rough life. I wanted him to be happy. I hoped this experience wouldn’t break him.
“I want to help.” His eyes pleaded with mine.
“I don’t want you to get hurt. What we are doing is exceedingly dangerous.”
“It’s too late to think of my well-being now.” Anger flickered over his face but quickly disappeared. “Don’t cut me out because you think I’m too fragile or weak. You brought me into this fight. I have no home, Ember. It’s not like I can return to school, and I won’t go back on the streets. You owe me. I deserve to know what is going on and to be a part of it.”
I nodded. Fault for his current predicament crushed my shoulders. I did owe him. He had lost everything he had known because of me. Another victim in my wake.
“I think you need to tell me everything, from the beginning.”
Again, I concurred. We sat, and I started to talk and continued until the sun was high in the sky, baking the earth.
NINE
Life fell into a pattern over the next couple of days. A few in the group took turns shopping or running errands while the others stayed back. Sometimes a few of the Dark Dwellers disappeared at night. Motorcycles tore through the darkness as they vanished from the compound. I tried not to think about where they were going, but I knew. The gang was “working.”
Kennedy, Mom, and I weren’t allowed to leave the property at all. Owen and Gabby were the ones to get Mom, Kennedy, and me personal items. Between Gabby’s style and the fact we didn’t care what they grabbed, we ended up with a fusion of rocker-chick, workout clothes, and cheap polyester. Josh took over wearing Dominic’s, which had been left behind. They engulfed him, but he seemed content.
Eli was true to his word: he did not interact with me unless it had to do with Kennedy’s training or some superficial question. He wasn’t being the psycho dickhead like he had been when I first came back or even the asshole I had known when we first met. He was indifferent. Acting like nothing had ever gone on between us or like he wasn’t remotely attracted to me. I had to admit this was worse. I could take the other temperaments. At least then I knew he was feeling something. To be fair, my stubbornness and hurt did not allow me to tell him how I really felt. My cover had me acting cool and reserved, following in his footsteps.
I knew I needed to stay as far from the draw of Eli Dragen as possible. My return to the cabin the night after we fought caused a few raised eyebrows, but no one said anything. They saw the aloofness Eli and I showed each other and seemed to understand. Torin’s presence put a huge roadblock between us. Even though Mom didn’t comment, I could see her delight with this new development.
Torin was slowly healing. He could get up and walk for a short time. He still had a long way to go. The cuts and bruises on his face remained swollen, but they had healed enough to recognize his beautiful Fay features. Thara never left his side. I had little doubt her faithfulness stemmed from more than duty. She was in love with him. This made things a little icier between Thara and me, and the tension among the Fay and Dark Dwellers was palpable.
The only good thing was since Torin’s and Thara’s arrival, my mom didn’t look at the door every minute like she was getting ready to bolt. Having other Fay around calmed her.
Kennedy embraced her newfound Druid heritage with gusto. There was a strength in her I hadn’t seen before. She held her head higher and had a way about her which made you turn and look. Every once in a while, though, I could see Ken appearing like she wanted to throw up or flee.
“How are you doing, really?” I asked her one night when we were alone in the cabin. I folded my legs under me, sitting on the bed with her.
Her gaze drifted to her hands, then back to me. “Better than I thought. You will probably understand this, but I always felt different. I mean really different. I used to think it was because I was adopted. The unknowns of where and who I came from made me not feel normal.” Kennedy’s soft brown eyes peered at me through her black, librarian-type glasses. She shifted them farther up the bridge of her nose. “I really just knew, like you probably did, that I really was strange. I mean I could see people’s auras, the actual glow a
round them, for crying out loud. I would have these strange moments where I would say this prophetic stuff, which I had no idea where it came from, but I knew it was true.” She straightened her back, sitting taller. “Now I understand who I really am. It is scary, but I feel good. Stronger.”
“You are.” I shook my head with wonder. “You are amazing. Even in the last couple of days, I have seen a change in you. I can tell you are scared shitless, but you’re jumping in with both feet. I’m in awe of you. It took me a lot longer to accept what I was.”
She smiled, a blush fluttered across her cheeks at my compliment. Her hand pushed against my leg. “Yeah, well at least I’m still human. You’ll always be the bigger freak.”
“Taller, not bigger! I’m a taller freak.” I laughed pushing her back. “I already feel like an Amazon next you. Don’t make me feel like an ogre.”
“Oh, please, ogre my butt.” She rolled her eyes. “Speaking of ogre... what is the deal with Eli?”
I couldn’t help but snort when she connected ogre with Eli. My shoulders went up and then fell. “I don’t know.”
She tipped her head to the side. “How do you feel about him?”
“That is an extremely complicated answer.” I let out a haggard laugh-sigh.
“No, it’s not. It’s quite simple.” Her stare drove into my soul. Her eyes glazed over. “You feel the draw toward both. You are connected to them. But one has you, and you have the other.”
My eyebrows curved up.
Kennedy shook her head, breaking her fixed gaze on me. “Oh, crap. I did it again, didn’t I?”
“Yeah...” I shifted uncomfortably on the bed.
“I’m so sorry.” She touched my arm. “Now that I know what I am, my powers are uncontrollable. The seer stuff is happening to me a lot more often and at the most random times.” Guilt etched at the corners of her mouth and eyes. “I really do apologize.”
“Don’t, Kennedy. You can’t help it.” I took her hand in mine, looking into her face. “Don’t ever apologize for who you are.”
A smile grew on her lips. “I won’t. Not anymore.” Then she bounded off the bed. “Come on. I want to show you something I learned today.”
I eagerly followed her outside. The late summer moon glinted high in the sky, leaving it lighter outside than usual.
She walked to a spot on the ground where a few wild flowers had curled up and died. The heat drained and burned the life out of them. My heart tugged. It was the cycle of life, but the earth was so much a part of me I wanted to mourn their deaths.
She knelt, cupping her hands around the plants. Her eyes were tightly closed, and she began to chant. It took a while, but as she ardently recited the strange words, I saw the flowers beginning to uncurl, the colors filling in, and their petals straightening. The ends were still burnt and some parts didn’t change, but the flowers stood straight. Alive.
“Holy crap!” My eyes boggled out of my head. “You brought them back to life.”
Kennedy sat back on her heels. “No, I can’t bring anything back to life, but I am learning to heal. They weren’t quite dead.”
“Ken, you’re amazing,” I gushed.
Pride glowed over her features. “I have a long, long way to go, but Owen says I am picking things up faster than he expected.”
“I’m not surprised. You’ve always been a quick learner. You love to study and figure things out.”
The sound of the screen door squeaking open brought our attention to the main house. Torin stepped slowly onto the porch, stretching. As if fate really wanted to stir up the situation, Eli moved out from the forest, tugging on some pants. Neither spotted us. Eli probably sensed I was close but didn’t know Ken and I were right there in the shadows.
I could see it coming. Eli and Torin had stayed as far away from each other as possible. When they crossed paths, I think everyone froze waiting for one of them to explode. Eli was coming off a run as a Dark Dweller and would already have his testosterone revving in top gear. He’d be looking for a fight.
I stepped forward, wanting to squash the inevitable altercation, but a hand stopped me. Kennedy shook her head. “They need to figure it out,” she whispered. Kennedy said this now, but when blood and body parts start flying, she might change her mind. I turned back to the see the guys’ paths getting closer.
Eli stopped in his tracks when he reached the bottom of the porch steps. Torin stood rigid with his face like stone. The hatred spewed from them hit the night air, cramming the warm breeze with hostility. Eli took the two steps of the porch in one, his focus on the door.
I felt like I was viewing a horror movie, torn between not wanting to watch and not able to turn away.
Maybe they won’t fight.
“She was never meant for you anyway, Dragen. Letting her go was the right thing.”
Damn! My lids squeezed shut, my hand coming up to my face.
Eli froze. Even in the dark I could see his shoulders tightening and hunching. Without a word, he turned toward Torin and stepped within an inch of him. Eli’s eyes flared red.
My movement was automatic. I could not let them hurt each other. Eli’s head jerked at the sound of my footsteps. His eyes latched on me through the dark, pinning me in place. They stayed on mine for a few beats before he faced Torin again and stepped back.
“All. Yours. My. Friend.” He spit out and whipped around, yanking the screen door open as he stomped into the house. The door banged so hard behind him the frame cracked.
I let out a staggered breath. “Holy shit.”
“I second that.” Kennedy expelled a breath. “That was a little intense.”
As Kennedy and I slipped back to the cabin, Eli’s words rung in my ears. “All yours my friend.” It was like a stab to the gut. Whether he meant it or not, it didn’t matter; the words lashed across my heart. If I did “choose” Torin, would Eli be okay with it? Could he so easily move on to another girl? Be happy with her? The thought made me want to heave in the bushes.
Being without Eli felt like torture. Being without Torin didn’t shrivel my heart into a dark hole. I knew who I truly wanted. My problem was even if I knew how I felt, I was too stubborn to give in. If he was all right being without me, then I had to find a way to be all right without him.
The next day, while most helped Kennedy with learning chants, spells, and healing powers, I took the time to go to the gym and train. I had a lot of aggression to get out. Eli had haunted my dreams the rest of the night. His words turned into vivid stories with him having stunningly beautiful, half-dressed water fairies sitting on his lap and around his feet, kissing them as he laughed at me. I woke up so mad I wanted to slug him.
Working out was how I dealt with those feelings. I also needed to keep my fighting skills in top shape. I had improved but was still far from being ready to battle any soldier. Alki’s voice remained constantly in my head: You are too slow. Not dedicated. When you go to stab someone, be sure about it. There is no redo if he kills you first.
I kind of missed that tyrant asshole.
While I was practicing, Josh stepped into the room. “Hey, can I join?”
“Sure.” I wiped the sweat from my forehead and let the sword’s tip lean on the floor. I was surprised I couldn’t hear Alki screaming at me from here. Never disengage. And never treat your sword like a walking stick. You respect it, and it will respect you.
Josh walked to the wall lined with fighting sticks, swords, and daggers. His eyes were wide with awe. “It’s like I walked into a World of War Craft fantasy.” His fingers trailed along every weapon.
“You should have seen the weapons room at Lars’. Talk about impressive and frightening at the same time.”
“He had more than this?” Josh caressed one of the broadswords.
“He’s the Unseelie King. He has more of everything.” I picked up my blade. “You ever use one of these before?” Josh looked at me, then away, shaking his head. “Well, grab one. I’ll show you.”
Jos
h grasped the broad sword. I was waiting for it to drop from his grip. They were a lot heavier than people thought. Surprisingly, he clutched it with ease, fitting it comfortably in his hand. He swung it around directing the tip at me.
“Wow, impressive. You sure you’ve never handled one before?” I teased.
He let his form go, letting the sword dip. “No, must be those years of playing video games.”
My eyebrows drew closer together. “Yeah, not quite the same.”
“So are you gonna keep jabbering or show me some moves?”
A mischievous smile curled my lips. “I love when little boys try to challenge me.”
Josh proved to be a quick study. After a few hours, he was parrying with me. I still held back, but he was better than I thought he would be. I’d have to be careful practicing with him.
It felt good to get my anger out. So much in me was black and bleak. Fighting seemed the one time my mind didn’t think. I only moved and reacted. It was when I finally experienced any kind of contentment.
Later in the evening, I dragged myself back to the room, my mind and body exhausted due to the heat and exercise. I slipped quickly into a slumber.
My lids opened to a familiar scene in front of me. I stood in the magical forest. Glinting and dreamlike, the trees swayed under the light breeze.
“It feels too long since we have been here together,” Torin said from beside me. “I have missed this.”
I peered at his face. Here in the dreamwalk, he was fully healed. It was hard to not have your breath taken away when he looked at you. Torin was beautiful.
“You really scared the crap out of me when I couldn’t contact you.”
“I apologize. I will do my best to never distress you again.” Out of my peripheral I could see him staring at me, his eyes full of heated longing. I kept my attention on the trees fluttering in the slight breeze, finding them the most fascinating thing I had even seen.
“Don’t say you’re sorry for something you couldn’t help.” I knocked my shoulder into his, trying to defuse the growing tension between us. He winced. “Oh, sorry. You look so normal in the dreamscape I forget you really are still hurt.”
Dwellers of Darkness (Darkness Series #3) Page 10
