Confused, conflicted, Gwendolyn began to move away, breaking the searing touch of her mouth against his.
Almost instantly, a hollow ache bloomed inside of her, sharp and painful. Jason tightened his hold on her waist, refusing to allow her to retreat farther. And then he waited.
Gwendolyn stood still, her nerves taut with anticipation, her entire body flushed with restless desire. No matter what the circumstances, she knew that this man was the person who completed her, who made her whole. With all his charm and faults, his sensuality and reckless behavior, she could not deny that he was her one true love.
Gwendolyn looked at Jason. His eyes held a spark of hope for their future and her heart clenched hard enough to tighten her throat. After all she had suffered, all she had lost, was it truly possible to finally find her happiness? Would she be able figure out a way to get beyond her feelings of betrayal and give him a second chance?
It took a long moment to find the courage to say what she was thinking. She raised her chin. “And if I asked you to leave?”
“I would leave.” He let out a hard laugh. “But I would return. Again and again and again.”
His words shifted through her mind, his intent very clear. He would not give her up. She laid a hand over her heart. “Then perhaps it would be best if we began anew.
A fresh start, with no lies between us.”
A smile of pure delight crossed his face, but the look in his eye was of hunger, a yearning for her that made Gwendolyn shiver. She felt the heat radiating from his body and drew toward it. She wanted to lose herself in it, to be enfolded in his embrace, in his love, until they were once again joined together.
Her body craved the perfect pleasure that Jason could arouse, but it was her heart, yearning for fulfillment, that pushed her forward. She caught his face in her hands, angled her mouth over his and kissed him and suddenly nothing mattered but the feel and taste and smell of her lover.
Jason insinuated his thighs between her legs, pressing against her sex as their tongues mated. Gwendolyn in turn devoured him with her mouth with a fierce possessiveness. There would be no half-measures in this relationship.
Slowly, his kiss changed. His lips softened, his tongue teased, his hands slid into her hair. Her blood thick-ened, the dangerous heat began low in her belly. Gwendolyn knew in that instant she had made the right choice. She would never want anyone else in her bed, or in her life. She would never feel this intense connection, this sense of belonging with any other man. Only with Jason.
Gwendolyn could feel the tension growing inside her.
She couldn’t seem to catch her breath, couldn’t halt the rush of sensations assaulting her. She struggled briefly against the fog engulfing her, then gave herself over to it completely, trusting Jason to keep her safe, to bring her joy.
Just as the cravings grew even more intense, he tore his mouth away from hers. His warmth left her and she stumbled forward, her knees weak, her senses muddled.
She saw him stride toward the door, securing it tightly before turning the key in the lock. Unbuttoning his shirt, he stormed back across the room. Moments later Gwendolyn was lying on her back on the bed, writhing uncontrollably as Jason worked feverishly to remove her clothing.
The layers of garments melted away as he kissed each part of her before tossing her clothes aside. She watched him through half-closed eyes as her body was unveiled, shivering in anticipation. There was nothing gentle or calm in his movements. Their need was too great, their passion too strong.
When her chest was bared, he bowed his head and drew his tongue over the tipped peak of her nipple. At her urging, he then closed his mouth over it and suckled. She gasped, her hips surging upward and he sucked harder. Gwendolyn closed her eyes and threaded her fingers through the golden waves of his thick, gorgeous hair, wantonly holding him at her breast.
Gwendolyn had never felt so many sensations at the same time. The pleasure was intense, but she knew there was more, much more, to come. And she wanted it all.
As if sensing she was ready, Jason released her nipple, biting and nipping his way up her chest and throat.
“Do you like that, my love?” he whispered in her ear.
She sighed deeply and rubbed against the length of his body. Then she felt his warm hands on her thighs as he slipped her undergarments down past her knees.
He turned slightly, yanked off his coat, ripped away his waistcoat, then pulled his shirt over his head. A wave of passion broke over her at the sight of his naked chest, sculpted with muscle and dusted with golden hair. The moonlight cast a beautiful warmth to his skin and her fingers itched to touch him.
He untied his breeches with one hand and turned back to her. Gwendolyn set her hands on his wide, hard chest and leaned for ward for another kiss. His eyes shimmering with heat, Jason obliged her. As they kissed, his hands roamed, molding her hips, sliding down her stomach.
Gwendolyn’s bed creaked loudly as he pushed her onto her back and partially covered her with his naked form. The moments of staggering loneliness she had experienced for the past four years faded from her being.
Gently, Jason nestled his face in the valley between her breasts, showering kisses on her naked flesh.
Once again he suckled at her breast, his beard softly abrading the tender, delicate mounds. The muscles of his arms and legs held her down, making her feel secure and cherished. His tongue laved and circled her nipple, sending streams of white-hot desire shuddering through her body.
Restless, impatient with excitement, she cried out and pushed him away. He lifted his head, smiled, then kissed his way lower, until his lips were moving along the flat of her naval and then the smooth skin of her upper thigh. The roughness of his jaw grazed lightly against her skin, creating another dimension of tingling sensation.
Gwendolyn’s legs shifted restlessly as she felt his warmth breath teasing the aching triangle between her legs. He kissed her there, sweetly, gently, his hands caressing as he moved a little lower.
“You shouldn’t,” she whispered, her eyes opening wide. “’Tis so amazingly wicked.”
“You are mine,” he insisted. “And I promise to do all manner of wicked things to you tonight. There are no more secrets between us, Gwendolyn. We will do anything, everything, to bring us both pleasure.”
He grasped her wrists and held them at her sides.
Then he dipped his head and resumed his caresses, his laving tongue touching her in a sweet, searching circle.
She whimpered as her breathing grew shallow. He plunged his tongue deep into her most sensitive place, lapping along the slick pink folds, teasing her until she sighed and sank deeper into the mattress.
The pleasure began pulsing through Gwendolyn.
Then the tension increased. She shifted and turned beneath Jason’s sensual assault, as the restlessness of her yet-to-be reached climax filled her. Her body strained against his mouth, her hands gripped the quilt, her heels dug into the mattress as the sensual torment continued.
Shameless, she opened her thighs wider, reveling in their wanton, wicked passion. Jason growled his approval and sucked harder, coaxing her desire. She nearly screamed with delight when he slipped a finger inside her and began to thrust. Her response was instinctual.
She pressed herself toward him, gasping at the sensation, wanting more. More of him.
He held her there, a prisoner to his relentless tongue.
All embarrassment fled, even though she was now fully exposed to him. The sensation was so intense it was almost unbearable. Every muscle tensed as she arched and stretched and rocked her hips forward. And then at last, she started to come apart, shuddering and trembling with the blissful reward of pleasure.
Jason continued kissing her damp curls, her inner thighs, her soft belly until the shivers ended, until her senses returned. Rising up, Gwendolyn leaned forward and threw herself into his embrace. Her eyes welled with emotion, but she blinked back the tears.
“My God, Gwendolyn,” he ra
sped. “How I need you.”
She shifted so she could see his face. Heaven help her, he was so handsome. She ran her hands lovingly over his chest, then pressed her lips to his body, flicking her tongue over his nipple. His skin was damp with perspiration, the taste of him wet and erotic. She imitated his earlier actions and swirled her tongue around his flat, hard nipples, tasting the saltiness of his skin, inhaling the masculine scent of his body.
Jason moaned with approval and moved closer. The tip of his enlarged penis brushed against the soft skin of her stomach. She jumped, then pushed herself against the hardness. He reached down, grabbed her hand and led it to his erection. “Touch me.”
Gwendolyn’s fingers curled lovingly around him. She drew her fingers down his length, amazed at the heat and hardness. It felt as if his penis was encased in warm satin. She stroked him to the base, then reversed directions, allowing her thumb to flick over the moist end of him. Jason made an incoherent sound of need.
He had said they would be wicked tonight, wanton, un-restrained. Did she dare? Filled with passion and daring, Gwendolyn stroked one hand up Jason’s chest and then bowed her head to take his penis in her mouth.
He cried out in a choked, astonished voice. Gwendolyn smiled, delighted at the response. She held his throbbing penis in one hand and drew her tongue slowly along the length, paying particular attention to the sensitive tip. Jason growled, started shaking, then began pumping his hips against her mouth.
“You are a wicked woman,” he panted, throwing his head back, the muscles in his neck stretched tight.
Feeling awkward, yet aroused, Gwendolyn circled the crest with the tip of her mouth, then closed her lips around him and suckled. He fell back on his elbows and moaned. Feeling confident that she was bringing him pleasure, she dug her fingers into his thighs and held him in place, teasing him with the same rhythm he had used on her.
With another groan, Jason caught her head in his hands, thrust for ward a few more times, then slowly eased her head back until his penis slipped free of her mouth. She gazed up at him, her brows drawn together in a frown. “Am I doing it wrong?”
His laugh was a hollow, almost tortured sound. “You are doing it amazingly right, my love.”
“Then why must I stop?”
“Because I am starting to lose control.”
She smiled. “Good.” Moving to a sitting position, she leaned for ward, taking one of his small, hard nipples into her mouth. Puckering her lips, she sucked hard.
Jason groaned. She continued teasing him with her mouth, while her hands kept busy below, touching him with gentle, then firm, strokes, until his body drew tense and heavy.
“Enough.” Jason grabbed her wrist, his body shuddering. “I need to be inside you.”
He moved so suddenly that she didn’t even realize it was happening until she was flat on her back, pinned beneath him. With a wicked smile, Jason pulled her knees apart and rose over her. A ragged breath escaped her lips as he positioned himself and drove his hard length deep inside her.
Braced on his arms, Jason stilled and gazed lovingly down at her. “Is it all right?”
Gwendolyn felt the tears pool in her eyes. “Yes,” she whispered. She brushed her fingers over his cheek and stared up at Jason’s beloved face as she lifted her hips against him.
“My God, you are a wonder.”
Gwendolyn smiled. She exhaled her breath and closed her eyes, glorying in the moment. They were joined together. In their hearts as well as their bodies.
She opened her eyes and moved her hips again. He groaned. She arched her back, rubbing her breasts against his bare chest. He uttered a low moan and began to move inside her, thrusting and withdrawing, increasing the rhythm slowly, steadily until they were bucking and twisting against each other.
And all the while he gazed deeply into her eyes, never once looking away, never once breaking their complete connection.
“You really do love me,” she whispered, her heart aching with joy.
“I do. And I always will.”
His words had an instant effect. Gwendolyn felt her body begin to convulse. She cried out sharply and Jason answered her sob by rocking his hips forward, moving them closer, driving into her harder and deeper, until her shaking ceased.
His hands moved from her hips to her buttocks. The strong rhythm of his deep thrust turned to a nearly frantic pace until suddenly he froze and cried out. Gwendolyn held him tightly against her heart as the warm heat of his seed pumped deep into her body. She caressed him in long soothing strokes down his back, whispering words of nonsense and love as his erection pulsed inside, then finally went still.
After a long moment of silence, he lifted himself off her. His handsome face was serene, content, when he bent to kiss her softly on the lips. Smiling, Gwendolyn rolled onto her side and tucked herself against his hard strength.
This time there was no guilt. No shameful regrets that she had betrayed herself by making love with a man who was committed to another. He was hers, utterly and completely, for as long as she wanted.
And oh, how she wanted.
She snuggled into his side, kissing the warm skin of his chest. She felt drowsy and languorous, but fought against falling asleep. “Are you sure about marrying me?” she asked.
Jason shifted his position and glared down at her. “Yes, I want to marry you. Have I not asked you at least a dozen times?”
“You have. But I do not want you to feel that you are obligated to offer for my hand because we have been physically intimate,” she replied, playing idly with the curling hair on his chest.
“We have not been physically intimate. We have made love. Several times, and each has been better than the last.”
She propped herself up on one elbow and smiled at him. “It has been rather marvelous.”
“It has.” He leaned forward and nipped the end of her nose. “And I can assure you, dearest, being with you is vastly different from anything that I have ever experienced. I know it is far more than sex. After all, I have not pledged myself to every women with whom I had sexual relations.”
“I imagine that would make you a criminal bigamist,” she said dryly.
He shrugged. “The number is too high to count.”
Gwendolyn snorted. “Now that’s a sentiment to warm a woman’s heart and inspire confidence in her future.”
“You wanted honesty,” he replied with a shame-faced grin.
“’Tis one thing to be honest with each other, Jason.
’Tis quite another to be hit over the head with it.”
“I cannot change my past,” he said solemnly.
“I am not asking for that, Jason. I know I am hardly the first woman in your bed. But I fully expect to be the last.”
“You shall be, because I love you. Only you.” Jason sobered and frowned. “What an amazingly indecent, indelicate, insensitive subject to be discussing with a woman.
With my woman. You are unique, my dearest. However, there is something that you need to understand, need to accept, Gwendolyn. My brother Jasper is the good son, the proper, responsible, respectable member of our family. I am the reckless, irresponsible, scandalous one.
“When we were young men we were both hellions, mired in scandal, reveling in our inappropriate behavior. But somehow, Jasper was able to contain his wilder nature, to harness this streak of abandon. He became absurdly proper and respectable, a man to be admired and emulated. While I . . . well, I remained the same.”
She tilted her head and gazed up at him, then realized he was not teasing her but rather being honest. Perhaps he had not been a model of decorum for most of his adult life, but Gwendolyn knew there was goodness, decency, even nobility in him, for she had seen it.
She pressed a finger to his lips. “Do not say such things.”
“They are true.”
“Not entirely.” Jason’s assessment of his own character revealed a vulnerability that went straight to Gwendolyn’s heart. Of course he had made mistak
es, done things he wished he had not, regretted choices made that were not the best. Didn’t ever yone? Including her? In Gwendolyn’s mind it was far more important to be a man of strong character, with a noble and true heart, rather than an individual who espoused perfect behavior.
“You are a fine, good, remarkable man, Jason Barrington,” she said in an authoritative voice. “And I shall challenge anyone who begs to differ. Including you.”
For a moment he looked confused. “’Tis an odd experience for me to have so fierce a champion.”
She stroked his hair. “Best get used to it.”
The bleakness was out of his eyes, replaced with a light of hope. “I fully intend to change, Gwendolyn. To mend my ways, to change my attitudes and behavior. ’Tis said that reformed rakes make the best husbands.”
She crinkled her nose and laughed. “What a ridiculous idea! Good men with true hearts and honest intentions make the best husbands.”
“Indeed. But men with purpose in their lives have stability.”
“And what, pray tell, is your purpose, Jason?”
His smile came straight from his heart. “To make sure you remain the happiest, most fulfilled, most pampered, most cherished female on earth.”
He was grinning down at her, with all the handsome, sexy, boyish charm that so completely captured her heart. “I hold no individual responsible for the state of my life. I expect marriage to be a partnership of mutual love and respect,” she said. “Yet I cannot help but applaud your lofty goals, my love.”
He laughed, a dark, soft sound deep in his throat.
“Does this mean you will marry me?”
Gwendolyn smiled, then turned into his arms, enjoying the gentle stroke of his hand against her hip. “Oh, yes, Jason. I will most certainly marry you.”
Chapter Eighteen
Gwendolyn’s mood was reflective as she made her way to Moorehead Manor the following morning. Though she had taken a long, leisurely bath earlier, she could still smell Jason’s scent on her body, could feel the soreness, the tightness in her muscles as a result of their vigorous lovemaking. They had slept briefly last night, wrapped within each other’s arms. Nudging Jason awake, Gwendolyn had whispered that he needed to leave before the dawn broke. Jason had smiled, declaring he would slip out her window and climb down the trellis, in an effort to avoid detection.
How to Enjoy a Scandal Page 26
