How to Date a Werewolf

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by Rose Pressey


  The traffic picked up. With it, exhaust fumes wafted through the open door mixed with a faint scent of the remaining late-blooming flowers outside. In front of my office I had a little patch of concrete. A tiny space. But enough for a few planters and such. I’d placed the rosebush close to the door so every time I walked in I would smell the roses. Even in the city, one should never be without flowers--they always lifted my spirits. And my spirits could use a lift.

  People walked by and I lifted my head to stare at them, wondering if their worlds were as crazy as mine. Somehow I doubted it. I looked down at my hands, making sure the fur was gone. Whew. I was back to normal. At least what constituted normal for me. It was at times such as this that I wondered about my career choice.

  I’d put everything I had into Get a Mate. Not to mention my parents’ retirement money. I couldn’t fail--I just couldn’t. Day after day, my customers said the same thing: finding a soul mate when you were that hairy proved to be extremely difficult. Try explaining to your new boyfriend why you grow outrageous amounts of hair and bay whenever the moon is full. Being a werewolf should not kill your social life, and my job was to lend a hand. Granted, I only turned into my complete werewolf-self during a full moon, or when completely stressed or very angry, but I sympathized with their pickle. Thankfully, I looked as normal as anyone else the rest of the time. As long as I didn’t forget to use depilatory on my knuckles, I was good to go.

  I switched on the computer and checked my email. The usual penis enlargement spam and a reminder for the monthly pack meeting. Nothing important.

  “Oh, my lord and Taylor. What the hell happened?” Jennifer’s scream broke the silence, interrupting my reverie. I forgot she hadn’t left for work yet. Now I would have to explain everything to her, reliving every agonizing detail.

  “Rylie, are you all right?” She ran to my desk. “Are you injured?”

  “Calm down, I’m fine. Do not panic,” I said. “You’re such a worrywart. That’s why I don’t want to tell you when something’s wrong.” I noticed my purse in her hands. I’d forgotten I’d thrown it on the floor while fighting with Lily.

  “You’re fine? Fine? Do you want to explain why your door is off its hinges? That doesn’t look like fine.” She set my purse on my desk.

  “Do I want to? No. Will I? I guess I have no choice. I know you’ll badger me until I do.” I stared at her.

  “You’re right, I will. I’m waiting.” She tapped her foot.

  “Are those my Prada pumps?” I’d saved forever to buy those.

  A sheepish grin curved her lips. “You don’t mind.”

  “Um, it wasn’t a question. It was a statement. It would be nice if you’d ask, but you never do.”

  She grinned again.

  “Okay, you’re right. I don’t mind.”

  She plopped down in the chair. Her blond curls bounced with the movement. She looked so stylish in a black wrap dress and my black sexy heels. A bit on the diva side, but stylish, nevertheless.

  “So, spill it. Did a tornado blow through while I was upstairs? How in the heck did your door get like that?”

  “Won’t you be late for work?” I shuffled a few stray papers on my desk.

  “I’ve got time. Now quit stalling and tell me what is going on around here.”

  “Some crazy man knocked it down.”

  “What? Shut up. Are you kidding? I can’t believe my ears.” Her mouth gaped open.

  “Close your mouth before you catch a fly. After Lily attacked me and I ran Jack off, a man burst through my door, knocking it down and me with it,” I said, looking her right in the eyes.

  “Stop.” She made a time-out signal. “What? Either my ears are filled with wax and I heard you incorrectly or you’re pulling my leg. Seriously, what happened to the door? And, oh my God, you shunned Jack? Are you insane? Have you lost your ever-lovin’ mind? He’s gorgeous. Delicious. Irresistible.”

  “I get it. Enough already. I told you. A man knocked it down. And no, I am not insane.”

  Her brown eyes were wide like saucers with shock.

  “My gosh, Rylie. What is going on? Is it safe for me to be here?” She glanced over her shoulder.

  “Don’t be silly. Of course it’s safe. The man was looking for my Uncle Ernie, that’s all. He wants him and nothing else. I’m not sweating it.” Not much.

  “And he can’t knock like a normal person? I’m beginning to wonder if you know any regular people besides me. Ever since you opened this business the crazies have come out of the woodwork.”

  “No, apparently he can’t knock.”

  She did have a point. I had met a few people who were less than sane.

  “I guess that explains why I found your purse on the floor.”

  I nodded.

  “So what happened with Jack and Lily? She attacked you?” She fidgeted with the tie on her dress.

  “She was in werewolf form when I came down the stairs. Growling at me, baring her shiny fangs.”

  I’d never forget the day when I told Jennifer I was a werewolf. I thought for sure she wouldn’t be my friend anymore, that she would call for the men with the little white coats. To my relief, she hadn’t. Although I feared she never believed any of the tales from my supernatural life and was only humoring me. She had never seen me shift before. I didn’t like to change in front of humans.

  “Are you all right?” She frowned.

  “Oh yeah. She only scratched my hand. When Jack came in, she ran away like a scared little girl. It’s not serious. She’s all bark.”

  “Oh my God. Hot guy saw Lily as a werewolf? What did he say?”

  “He thought it was a huge dog or coyote attacking me.” I giggled.

  “Rylie, your life is like a movie. No, it’s better than a movie.”

  “My life is like a horror movie that never ends.” I clucked my tongue and eased my head back to rest against my chair.

  “Oh, come on. Your life is great. Well, except for the werewolf thing. But that seems to be working out all right for you, I guess. You have a great business, a family who loves you, and you live in a great apartment with a fabulous roommate.” She gave a wide grin.

  “You’re right. I suppose it’s not so bad. I mean, business is so-so. That’s a plus, right?” I tried to remain optimistic. Jennifer nodded. “You’d be surprised at how many single werewolves are running around this town.” Sounded more like I tried to reassure myself.

  “Speaking of single werewolves.” She focused on her newly manicured nails, trying to appear casual. As if at the very mention of unattached lycanthropes I would run like a wild animal. (I am not wild--I may be half animal, but I’m not wild.)

  I knew where she was going with the announcement. Jennifer wouldn’t give up about the me-being-dateless thing.

  “What about single werewolves?” Getting this conversation over with was the best thing I could do, I figured.

  “I’ve been thinking...”

  “Uh-oh.”

  “Hey. I do think about things other than when Todd will ask me to marry him. Don’t you realize I have other things on my mind?”

  I wanted to say no to that, but refrained.

  “Here’s the deal. It’s about this curse thing. Have you ever thought that maybe there is no curse? I’ve never actually known anyone with a real curse before.”

  I couldn’t lie--the thought had crossed my mind. I wished it didn’t exist, but it did. My love life served as proof.

  “A real curse? As opposed to a fake one? Listen, Jen, why can I not find a boyfriend if there is no curse? Why do all the guys I go out with disappear after the third date faster than an American Idol cast-off’s career?”

  “Maybe it’s all in your head? You know, when you think something will happen, eventually it does. That kind of thing.”

  “Believe me, I thought that at first. But you know how it is. You’ve seen with your own eyes. You can’t deny the facts.”

  “I guess...” She frowned. “But sometimes
you sabotage dates.”

  “I do not.” Ever since that lake incident, she says I purposely ruin my dates. Long story, but it wasn’t my fault my date couldn’t swim. The lifeguard saved him, so everything worked out. He wasn’t my type, anyway, but Jennifer constantly threw that one little snafu in my face. “Enough about me. What’s going on with you and Todd?”

  “Honestly, Rylie, I have no idea. He doesn’t really talk to me anymore. We don’t argue. We don’t communicate at all.”

  “I’m sorry, Jen. You know you can talk to me anytime.”

  “I know. Thanks for always being there.”

  “You do the same for me. Maybe you need to tell him how you feel. Get everything out in the open.”

  She let out a deep sigh. “I know I do, but actually doing it isn’t easy. Taking that first step is so hard. We’ve been together so long. It’s familiar, you know?”

  I shook my head. “Yeah. I understand.”

  “Enough of that. You’re not getting off the subject that easily. Nice try, though. Maybe you should give one of these werewolf guys a chance. How bad can they be?”

  “If I found one I liked I would, but it wouldn’t work. It’s the curse. The curse, you know.”

  “You’re too picky.” She scowled.

  “Maybe,” I said, taking in a deep breath.

  “I bet I know a guy you wouldn’t mind doing a little bedroom tango with. A little mattress stomp, the down-and-dirty deed.” She wiggled her hips.

  “Oh, stop it. Don’t embarrass me.”

  As if on cue, Jack walked in. My jaw must have dropped to the floor. Did he hear our conversation? I needed to get that door back up pronto.

  “I gotta run. See you later.” Jennifer scrambled for her purse and flounced out the door.

  “Bye.” Jack smiled and she giggled.

  I couldn’t believe she left me to explain the conversation he had probably overheard. There I was, once again, all alone with Jack Chandler. Four times in less than twenty-four hours. Not that I complained about seeing him again, just that I’d have to clarify things.

  “I wanted to apologize for earlier,” he began. “I wanted to before, but the door thing threw me for a loop. I can imagine you were quite upset about the dog, or coyote, or whatever it was. Then I come at you like some dimwit. I’m so sorry I scared you like that. I was only trying to open the door for you. My mother always taught me to be a gentleman. At least I sure try to be one.” The words spewed from his lips in a hurry.

  “Oh no. I didn’t think that. I was just...” How would I explain to him? I had no idea what to say. I was just hiding my fluffy mitt. No, I couldn’t tell the truth.

  His intoxicating aroma swirled around the room again, and I was on a lust-induced high from it. There was no telling what I would say with that smell in the air.

  “There’s no need to explain. Please accept my apologies for acting like such a lout.”

  If that’s what he thought a lout acted like, what would he think of some of the customers I had?

  He picked up a book from my desk. “You like Stephen King?”

  “I do. What about you?”

  “I’ve read every one of his books at least twice,” he said.

  “Really? Me too.”

  Another reason to like Jack.

  “There was one other reason I stopped in.” He returned the book to its spot.

  Oh no. Perhaps he wanted to tell me he thought I needed antipsychotic medication. After all, that was his job.

  “Yes.” I used my best business voice. At least, I hoped I sounded professional.

  “I was wondering if you’d like to go out on a date.”

  “With you?”

  “Yes, I hope with me. I’m not asking for anyone else.” He laughed.

  Why did I not think before I spoke? That was such a stupid question.

  “Yes, sure, I’d like that. Sounds fabulous.”

  “Great. How about tonight? I know it’s short notice, but are you free?”

  Was I free? Yeah, you could say I was free. Free would be an appropriate term for it. The only dates I had were with clients, the non-romantic kind. So, yes, I was completely available.

  “Wait a second, let me check my schedule.” How cliché was that? But at least I wouldn’t appear to be a complete loser.

  A knock came on the doorframe. The UPS man stood there holding a package.

  “I have a package for someone by the name of Cruz. I can’t make out the first name.” He squinted and attempted to read the name again.

  “I’m Miss Cruz.” I waved my hand.

  He shuffled over, promptly plopping the box on my desk. After punching information into the electronic device, and without uttering a word, he thrust it in front of my nose, demanding a signature. He must have been in a hurry. I scribbled my name on the screen. Or at least I attempted to write it--those things never worked right.

  “Have a nice day.” The man eyed the broken door on his way out and gave me an odd glance.

  “You too,” I mumbled, wishing he’d stop staring and get the heck out.

  Jack nodded at the man and then looked at me again.

  “Do you need to open that? I can help if you want,” Jack said.

  I glanced down at the package for the first time. It was a small white box with my surname and address across the top. But there was one small detail that made my heart lurch, and I knew there was no way I could open the box in front of Jack.

  In the corner where the return address should have been was a little sketch. The artist wasn’t that talented, but it was good enough for me to discern. A werewolf head was drawn and beside it was a gun--a cryptic message for some, but not for me. I knew exactly what it meant.

  Chapter 4

  How to Date a Werewolf Rule # 4:

  Avoid giving silver jewelry as a gift.

  Jack peered at the box. He stared wide-eyed at the meticulous sketches, then lifted his gaze, focusing on me. Damn. I thought I’d get lucky and he wouldn’t notice the weird drawings. Rather than wait for him to ask, I’d offer an explanation. Not that he would ask.

  He furrowed his brow. Fantabulous. More weirdness for him to contemplate. He already had suspicions about my involvement in illegal activities. I didn’t need to add fuel to the paranormal fire. But why did he want to go on a date with me if he thought I was involved in shady behavior? Possibly he thought he’d catch me in the act.

  “My cousin, Maria, she’s a real cut-up.” I attempted to cover my nervousness with laughter. “She’s an art student and constantly doodling.” I giggled more. If I didn’t stop, he’d think I was drunk.

  He quirked a brow and I prayed he believed my fib. It wasn’t a complete lie. Maria did attend art school. Again, my lying abilities had improved, which, quite frankly, scared me slightly.

  “So, tonight? I’ll pick you up at seven?”

  I melted a little every time the sexy drawl oozed from his lips. “Sounds perfect. At least you don’t have far to travel.” I smiled. If I was dreaming, I prayed I wouldn’t wake up before the good part.

  “No, I don’t.” He chuckled. “Oh, by the way, do you have a favorite restaurant you’d like to go to? I’m new in town. I haven’t had a chance to explore the city much.”

  “You moved here recently? Really? Where did you move from?”

  “Houston. Born and raised.” The gleam in his eyes said “proud Texan.”

  “What brings you to New Orleans?” Before he answered, the phone rang. Damn. Why did I actually have to work?

  “I’ll let you get the phone. I’ll see you tonight?”

  “Yes, tonight. And I do have a favorite.”

  He winked and waved before strolling out.

  “Get a Mate, may I help you?” I studied Jack as he walked out my door-less office. Who knew khaki pants could look so good?

  “Ry, it’s Mama.”

  Uh-oh. My mother calling before noon could not be good. She had never been a morning person. Usually she didn’t sp
eak in complete sentences until after one in the afternoon. Growing up, she would drive me to school asleep. Many a morning I grabbed the wheel in the nick of time when she nodded off. No doubt trouble had to be the basis for her call.

  “What’s up, Mama? Everything all right?”

  “Your father wanted me to ask if you’ve talked to Uncle Ernie. He hasn’t spoken to him for several days and some rude man called here early this morning looking for him. It really ticked me off because you know how I like my beauty sleep. After his call I couldn’t go back to sleep.”

  How could I forget she turned into a wild beast without a restful night’s sleep? No pun intended.

  “Plus, I don’t want you to forget about the pack assembly next Friday. It should be one heck of a meeting. You won’t want to miss it.”

  “Meeting? Don’t you mean party?” My pack--all werewolves belonged to one--had monthly gatherings. And let me tell you, they always turned into one heck of a bash, especially when they switched the karaoke machine to the on position.

  “It’s a meeting and you know it.”

  “All I’m saying is those crazy lycanthropes can put away some barbeque ribs and beer. To be honest, it’s a little scary to watch.”

  My parents forced me to attend these wacky get-togethers, and I begrudgingly obliged. The event was supposed to be a time when we discussed concerns and issues within the werewolf community, but that rarely happened.

  “But you’ll be there?” She produced a sniffle.

  “I got the email reminder this morning and I’ll be there.” The sniffing stopped. “Do you and Dad need a ride?”

  “No, actually, I forgot to tell you…Your father bought a new motorcycle, so we’ll be riding the bike to the meeting. It’s a brand-new Harley and so cool. The helmet messes up my hair something fierce, but your daddy looks so sexy on that bike, I can’t refuse.”

  “A motorcycle? Cool? What is wrong with you people?” I snapped.

  “Us people? First, remember we are not people. We are werewolves, and we’re your parents. So watch your tone, young lady.”

  “Don’t get technical, Mother. You know what I mean.”

 

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