by Claire Adams
The next picture on my phone was of Natalie and me. She was wearing one of my t-shirts, and we were sitting in bed. She was snuggled under my arm, and we were both smiling at the camera. It was one of my favorite pictures because it was raw and unedited. That picture summed up our weekends perfectly, and it made me believe that marriage was not just possible for me – it might actually be pretty amazing.
I was looking through more pictures when the door opened abruptly, and Jason walked in. The sight of him pissed me off immediately, and I put my phone down and stood up.
“You’re supposed to knock first,” I hissed at him.
He shrugged without concern. “Didn’t feel like it,” he said.
I could tell from his smug expression that he was up to something, and I tensed instantly. It had been months since we’d heard anything from him, and Natalie and I had relaxed. Obviously, this had been his plan. He had wanted to lull us into a false sense of security, and I had to hand it to him, he had succeeded. I genuinely felt as though the rug had been pulled out from underneath me.
“May I sit down?” Jason asked, closing the door to my office behind him.
“No.”
“I’ll sit anyway,” he said pleasantly.
He sat down and cocked his legs. Then he regarded me with a superior expression that made me feel sick to my stomach. I refused to let him know I was worried, however. I stared him down and raised my eyebrows.
“What do you want, Jason?” I demanded.
“I came to discuss something with you,” Jason said. “Man to man.”
I wanted to make a joke aimed at his manhood, or lack thereof, but I suppressed the urge. “What do you want?”
“I came to talk to you about Natalie.”
I narrowed my eyes at him threateningly. “There’s nothing about Natalie you need to discuss with me. She’s not interested in you, she’s never been interested in you, and she never will be.”
“Thanks to you.”
I let out a bark of laughter. “You’re kidding, right?” I said. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but didn’t she reject you long before she got involved with me?”
I saw Jason’s perfectly constructed mask falter a little, but he managed to keep it in place. “Do you care about her?”
“How I feel about her is none of your business,” I said.
Jason laughed. “Of course, you care about her. You probably even love her… That’s good. I’m glad you do. It works out better for me that way.”
“Oh yeah? And how do you figure that?”
“Because I’m banking on your love for her.”
I felt my hands clench into fists and I knew I would have to demonstrate tremendous willpower in this particular situation. “Did you come here to talk in riddles or did you actually have something you wanted to say to me?”
Jason looked calm as ever as he reached into his jacket pocket and took out a large brown envelope. He slammed it down on the table in front of me. “I’m sure you’ll be interested to see what’s inside that envelope.”
Removed of choice, I picked it up and opened it. Inside were several large photographs. I took them out and looked through them, one by one. They were all pictures of Natalie and me. There were pictures of us holding hands as we walked through my neighborhood, pictures of us at the museum, the beach, and several different restaurants.
I paused as I came to a picture of Natalie and me walking down Prescott Lane. I could only see a hint of the stunning strapless embellished mini she had been wearing. The rest of the dress was covered over by the coat I had given her to protect against the cold night air.
I looked up at Jason in shock. “You’ve been following Natalie around since her birthday?”
He didn’t say a word.
“No,” I said, correcting myself. “Obviously you’ve been following her around way before that. You’re a fucking stalker.”
“What I am is none of your concern.”
“The hell it isn’t,” I spat. “You’re going to jail, asshole.”
He laughed, as though he were completely unconcerned. “I don’t think so.”
His confidence was troubling me, but I continued on, sure of my course now. “You think I care about my job?” I demanded. “I’d gladly give it up for Natalie’s sake.”
“I’m sure you would,” he nodded. “And that’s very noble of you. But I’m not really concerned about you. I’m concerned about Natalie.”
I frowned, starting to realize what he was really threatening. “You see, once I go to the dean with those pictures, he’ll be forced to make an example out of both of you. He’ll fire you, and as for Natalie… Well, he’ll be forced to retract her scholarship and expel her. Which means she’ll be kicked out of school only weeks shy of her graduation. That’s pretty tragic, if you ask me. Especially considering she’s not from a well-to-do family. It’s not like she can pay to get into another good university.”
I gritted my teeth. “You fucking bastard.”
He just smiled.
“I can report you, anyway,” I said, wondering if it was wise to call his bluff. “Sure, I’d be out of a job and Natalie wouldn’t graduate, but you’d be going to jail. What she and I did is not illegal. But what you’re doing definitely is.”
Jason shrugged. “That’s your call to make,” he said. “I just wonder how Natalie would feel being kicked out of school so unceremoniously after she worked as hard as she did. Maybe I overestimated how much you cared about her.”
“You’d really go to jail?” I demanded. “You’d go to jail, rather than leave Natalie alone?”
“She humiliated me,” he said as his face turned sour and vengeful. “She rejected me after I was nothing but nice to her. She didn’t even give me a chance.”
“So what? You’re going to punish her for that?”
“Yes,” he said. “I am. She’s going to rue the day she said no to me. She’s forever going to regret choosing you over me. You could send me to jail, but I don’t believe you would do that. Because what you’re risking is Natalie’s future, and I think you care about her too much to take that risk. And so I can confidently say send me to jail… I dare you.”
“You’re crazy… You realize that, don’t you?”
“Let’s dispense with the niceties and just get down to business.”
“What the hell are you talking about, you psychopath?” I demanded.
“I’m trying to tell you that you have a choice,” he said. “You can save Natalie’s future if you stop sparring with me long enough to find out.”
I was so angry that I was practically shaking, but I knew Jason had the upper hand here. I suppressed my rage and nodded for him to continue.
“Break up with Natalie,” Jason said, without missing a beat.
“Excuse me?” I said, in disbelief.
“Break up with Natalie, and I’ll leave you both alone,” Jason said smugly. “I won’t report the two of you because there won’t be anything to report. Then you can keep your job and find another student to fuck, Natalie can graduate and save her future, and everybody wins.”
“Everybody wins?” I repeated, in a low voice. “Are you fucking serious?”
Jason smiled. “It’s a pretty good deal.”
“I have one question?”
“By all means go ahead,” he said.
“Why did you wait till now to do this?” I demanded. “You had months… Why now?”
His smile turned cruel. “Graduation is around the corner; Natalie is finally at the finish line, and she’s worked hard to get there. She thinks her life is perfect – what better way to bring her down from her little fairytale than to have the man she loves dump her right before her biggest accomplishment?”
I looked at Jason and shook my head. “You are a tiny, tiny man…”
“What do you say?” Jason asked happily. “Are you taking my deal or not?”
I fell silent for a moment, weighing my options. “You yourself pointed out that Natalie
is graduating soon. What’s to stop me from getting back together with her after she’s got her degree?” I asked.
His smile didn’t falter. “I’m glad you asked… I’m also glad that you obviously didn’t glance through the university’s rules and regulations page before you signed your contract. You see, this university is one of the few that maintain a rescinding policy. Meaning that if any alumni are caught doing anything illegal or dishonorable in any way, the university maintains the right to rescind the degree that was earned.”
“I hardly think having a relationship with your professor qualifies as illegal or dishonorable,” I spat.
“No, but sleeping your way to an A grade is considered dishonorable.”
“That’s not what happened.”
“That’s what I’ll make is sound like,” Jason said. “And since my father has made generous donations to this university, I know that many will be inclined to believe me. Even if she keeps her degree it won’t matter… my father is a powerful man. He has made careers and he has broken them. If you want Natalie to be a piranha in the job market, then you can go ahead and be bull headed about this.”
He had covered his bases, and I felt any semblance of control I thought I had slipped from my grasp. Jason seemed to sense the defeat on my shoulders because his smile grew wider.
“I take it we have a deal?” he asked.
I practically had to choke the words from my mouth. “Fine,” I barked.
“Not a very gracious acceptance, but I’ll take it.” He smiled. “Oh, and one more thing.”
“What now?”
“Make it believable. You have to make it seem like you’re not interested in her anymore,” Jason said. “I don’t want her suspecting that anyone else is involved. She has to believe that you don’t care about the relationship anymore. Understood?”
“Get out of my fucking office.”
“I’ll take that as a yes.” Jason smiled. He stood up slowly and headed towards the door.
“Jason?” I said, and he stopped in his tracks.
“Yes?”
“You were following us the night of Natalie’s birthday, weren’t you?”
“Yes,” he replied, without shame.
“I have a condition, too,” I said, choking back my anger. “I’ll keep to your twisted deal on one condition. I don’t ever want to see your face again. And if I do, rest assured, I’m going to punch the living shit out of you.”
Jason looked amused. “What makes you think I’ll ever need to see or speak to you again after this?”
With that, he turned and walked out of my office. I reached for my phone, and my eyes fell immediately to my open picture library. Natalie stared out at me, and I looked at her face and shook my head.
“I’m sorry,” I said to her, knowing that I could never give her the explanation she would expect. “I’m so sorry.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Natalie
Missy was sitting at her desk when I walked in. She whirled around to greet me, and I could tell from her expression that she was looking for a distraction.
“Cramming, are you?” I asked.
“Urgh…my last final is two days from now, and I’m so over it,” she groaned. “What about you?”
“Just finished my last final,” I glowed. “So, I’m free as a bird!”
“Lucky bitch,” she complained. “It feels as though you’ve got the lion’s share of the luck these days.”
I laughed. “Don’t say that, what about Mitch?”
Missy shrugged.
“What does that mean?” I asked.
She sighed. “We broke up.”
“What?” I exclaimed. “When?”
“A week ago,” she sighed. “He started freaking out about stupid shit, and I just didn’t have the patience to deal with it. I’m so glad that we’re graduating soon and I won’t have to deal with immature college idiots anymore. I’m ready for a real relationship and a real man…like the one you’ve got.”
I smiled instantly at the mention of Chance. “He just called me.” He had been a little distant in the last few weeks but I hadn’t minded so much because I had to focus on my exams. Now that I was free, I was desperate to spend some time with him.
“Oh? And what did Prince Charming say?” Missy asked
“He wants to take me out to dinner tonight,” I said excitedly. “He did mention that he had something important he wanted to discuss with me.”
“Oh?” she said, as her eyebrows shot into the air.
“Yeah,” I nodded.
“Did he mention what he wanted to discuss?” she asked curiously.
“Not a word,” I said. “But he sounded kind of nervous on the phone.”
“Did he now?” she said contemplatively. “That’s definitely a sign.”
“How is it a sign?” I asked. “A sign of what?”
“Of what?” Missy repeated, and then she shook her head at me. “Of what, she asks.”
I paused for a moment, and I felt expectation rise inside me. “You don’t think he’s going to propose, do you?”
Missy clapped her hands together. “Oh my God! What if that’s exactly what he’s going to do?”
“No,” I said quickly. “No, that’s crazy.”
“Why?”
“Because we haven’t even been together that long.”
“It’s been almost a year,” she reminded me. “Plus, he’s taken you to Paris, plus you guys are practically living together, and oh yeah…he just happens to be in love with you.”
I smiled. “Well…”
“And consider the timing,” Missy continued on, cutting me off in her excitement. “You’ve just finished finals, and you’re graduating in less than a month.”
I thought about it, and as I thought about it, my mind started to take control. For a moment, I saw myself in a beautiful white silk dress, walking down the aisle towards Chance. I saw my parents watching me with tears in their eyes, I saw Missy cheering from the sidelines, and I saw flowers and music and a three-tiered cake that looked too beautiful to cut. I saw my wedding day so clearly that it shocked me how detailed my imagination got.
It was almost as though I had planned this day since I was seven. But the truth was, I hadn’t. I had dreamed about traveling. I had dreamed about exotic countries but never had I imagined my wedding. The dream was so real that I could taste the happiness on my tongue and it was suitably intoxicating.
I realized suddenly how much I wanted it to be true. I wanted to be with Chance for the rest of my life. We were just to right together, but a part of me was scared to get too invested in that hope. What if I am completely misreading the situation? What if all Chance wants to do is help me celebrate the end of finals?
“I don’t think he’s going to propose,” I told Missy because I didn’t want to buy into the fantasy. Now that I’d realized how important it was to me, I didn’t want to get my hopes up and set myself up for disappointment.
“There’s a chance, though.”
“There’s always a chance for anything,” I pointed out.
Missy turned away from me and opened up a new page on her computer screen. “What are you doing?” I asked, sitting beside her.
“What does it look like I’m doing?” she said. “I’m looking up wedding dresses.”
“Missy…”
“Come on; I need a distraction.”
“Watching a movie would also serve as a distraction.”
“I like this distraction better,” she said. “What do you think is more your style: mermaid or ball gown?”
“Uh… I hadn’t really thought about it.”
“I’m thinking ball gown,” she said, clicking on a link.
I felt my face turn sour as I took in the extravagant dresses. “Urgh…nope, ball gown is definitely not for me. Click on that link.”
“Which one?”
“The sheaths,” I pointed.
And just like that, I found myself drawn into Missy’
s little distraction. It was hard not to feel giddy and excited when you looked at wedding dresses. I couldn’t believe I’d never done this before.
“Sheaths are so simple, though,” Missy said. “Are you sure you want a dress like that?”
“Simple is exactly why I like them,” I said. “It’s sophisticated and elegant, without being dramatic.”
“There’s nothing wrong with a little drama on your wedding day,” Missy pointed out.
I smiled. “Not for my wedding dress, please.”
“Fine, fine,” she said, in exasperation. “How about this one?”
“That one,” I said, pointing to the last picture in the group.
It was an off-white sheath with thin straps and a plunging V neckline. Its bodice was trimmed with intricate lace that was strategically placed so that hints of naked skin could be spied from between the panels of thin fabric. The skirt was unadorned, just a flowing confection of uninterrupted white that seemed to glide with movement even in stillness.
“It’s beautiful,” I breathed, caught up in the moment.
“Wow… You would look stunning in that.”
I shook my head and turned my eyes away from the image. “This is so crazy,” I said. “I shouldn’t be looking at wedding dresses. This is all happening in my head. Chance is not going to propose.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“Because… Because I am,” I said uncertainly. “I don’t even know if he’s the marrying type.”
Missy looked thoroughly unconvinced. “If he’s the type to plan romantic trips and cook meals for you and introduce you to his family, then he’s the marrying type. The question is, are you the marrying type?”
I smiled slowly. “I’m beginning to think I am.”
“I knew it!”
“One day,” I added quickly. “One day…yes. I would love to get married. But it’s too soon.”
“You’re graduating soon.”
“I’m only twenty-one.”
“You’re also an old soul.”
I bit my lip. “It is fun to think about, though…”
