The painting muttered. «Ms. Peggy, it’s precisely you who should not be complaining».
The housekeeper only snorted.
«And then we aren’t talking about that, you know it very well. We’re talking about potential here».
«Yeah, just the potential we need!», replied the woman, ironically.
Mr. Orazio whispered to Lizzi: «What are they saying? What are they talking about?».
She played it down: «Don’t listen to them, those boring people. They use so many words, but not even they know what they mean».
«I think…».
He was suddenly interrupted. «Wrong! You mustn’t think! This is the only thing you must never do! If you want to remember you have to stop reasoning, erase all thoughts from your mind».
«Why remember? Not to die? Don’t you think this is foolish?».
«I didn’t say that. I never said that you won’t die if you remember. It could be even worse, you know, but we must try at least».
«Why?».
She made a vague gesture pointing at Ms. Peggy, who was busy in a heated argument with the paintings. «Because of those things there, I imagine».
In complete astonishment, Mr. Orazio repeated: «The potential? What does it mean?».
He received a warm look. «Are you asking me? I’m just a little girl!».
11
«I can’t do it».
«You aren’t trying hard enough!».
She even giggle while she said those words. The red witch followed her, bored. This time Lizzi had preferred to accompany him while exploring the house, to protect him from other shocking encounters.
That was her mother’s study, or so she told him, but that did not help him at all. There was a desk and some shelves on the walls. Bookcases completely empty, not a piece of paper remained in that sterile room.
«What have you done with it?».
«With what?».
«With everything that was in here».
«Why do you think it was us who did anything?».
«Who else?».
«It could have been you».
Mr. Orazio had strong doubts about that: an eight year old child was not capable of performing such a job by himself.
«Are my parents dead?».
«That doesn’t matter now».
«They must be dead, given that I was adopted».
«Can you understand it doesn’t matter? I didn’t bring you here for that! Stop thinking!».
As Lizzi kept getting angrier and angrier, Mr. Orazio fell deeper and deeper in depression; memories could not be recalled just like that girl wanted, memory has to be stimulated, and she was not helping him at all.
«What did my mother do in here?».
«You tell me».
He examined the room a bit more. «It looks like a lawyer’s study or maybe a doctor’s. It’s not clear, she could have been anything, even an architect!».
«You’re still reasoning, making assumptions! You refuse to help yourself!».
«What should I do then? I cannot help but think!».
The red witch stepped forward and started gesticulating to her friend. Lizzi seemed angry, but the red witch had the upper hand, literally pushing her to the door, all of this without saying a word.
When they were alone, the red witch headed towards him.
There was fire in her eyes, something wild in her look, and yet she lacked her friend’s subtle grudge and irony. She held his hand and made him sit at on desk, then she jumped and sat opposite him.
She did not do anything, she just looked at him.
Mr. Orazio felt uncomfortable, but after some minutes the tension died down. Talking to that firl was useless, she would not give him any answer. Maybe she had chosen to send her friend away on purpose, to keep him from any external influence.
What did he have to do? Remember, try to remember, make an effort? Or just let go and lower all barriers?
Mr. Orazio stretched on the armchair and closed his eyes. The red witch also disappeared.
He did not say to himself for the umpteenth time that it was useless, that it was just foolish; this time he emptied his mind and nothing else.
«Mom, why don’t I have a brother?».
The woman sitting at the desk had long brown hair, tied in a ponytail. She put the book she was reading down and turned to him, smiling.
«He didn’t arrive, Orazio. We really wanted him too, but he didn’t arrive».
She had very bright and intense beautiful dark green eyes. She was holding a pencil to underline the parts she liked in her book.
«If I had a brother would you love him too? As much as you love me?».
Her smile widened. «Naturally, Orazio».
«Even if he isn’t like me?».
«Oh, you’re special, there can never be anyone else like you».
«But will you love him like you love me?».
«Certainly Orazio, he would be my child, right? All mothers love their own children».
«Then if I wish for it I can have a brother».
Her mother’s smile deteriorated and seemed like a shadow had dived into her face.
Her words reached him, from afar, as if it was coming through a fog.
«You can have anything you want».
«When was Bobo born? When did that happen?».
Lizzi did not open her mouth, but Mr. Orazio did not give up. «He isn’t my parents’ son!».
Lizzi exploded. «And does that surprise you? What sane mother would call his own son Bobo?».
Then she started moving back and forth gesticulating. «I don’t understand why you’re so upset. Deep down you had understood that you created all of us. I thought this was clear by now!».
«Yes, but…».
«You also created Bobo, so? You wanted a brother, your parents weren’t capable of giving you one, and then you got one yourself! And Ms. Peggy? You created her after having seen Mary Poppins on TV, you’ve probably guessed this too, right? You just upgraded her a bit. You’ve upgraded us all, always based on your tastes».
«You told me YoYo was the first».
«Maybe. Yes, maybe he was the first. What’s the difference?».
«Was I four years old when I created him?».
«And what about that?».
«My mother know». Then he stopped, because not even he managed to understand the situation completely. «My mother knew what I did and wasn’t happy about it».
Lizzi burst in laughter. «How could she not know? You were filling the house with your creations! I don’t think the cook domineering the kitchen or Ms. Peggy going around the house would go unnoticed».
«They were real then? I wasn’t the only one capable of seeing you?».
«Do you need another slap?».
«What are you? How is it possible?».
«I don’t know! Understand I don’t know! Only you can find the answer to that question!».
«Why did I create you? What was the reason?».
She snorted as usual. «Because you were a child, and children don’t take no for an answer; because you always got what you desired».
«But why you?».
«Because… because…». She stood in silence for a moment. «You must remember the reason on your own».
She was losing his patience, but Mr. Orazio still needed to know one thing. «When did it happen? That memory I saw, my mother… How old was I when I created Bobo?».
Lizzi stood silent for a long time. «You were six, you had just come back from school. You had met other children that had brothers, so you wanted one for yourself».
Then she broke her rule and added: «It was the only time you went to school, and then you were retired from school thinking you were sick. You never went back there».
Mr. Orazio froze agape. «What does it mean?».
«You’ll find out soon».
12
«Excuse me Bobo, can we talk?».
The child’s room was small and gloomy. Not even ther
e could toys be found, and it was anonymous. He was sitting at a table, writing. He froze when he heard his words.
Mr. Orazio sat on the edge of the bed.
Whether it was reality or fantasy, madness or hallucination, he was embroiled in that spider web and could no longer escape by now. He felt strange knowing that the child in front of him had YoYo’s consistency. And yet he was his brother, he had desired him; he had wanted him so much, to the point of creating him. All that meant something, right?
«What… what was your life like? I mean, how did Mom and Dad take you being here?».
He turned slowly to look at him, but then he turned quickly again. He could not bear to look at Mr. Orazio in that condition.
«They were nice», he murmured.
But they had not loved him, not like a son, Mr. Orazio could understand that. It would not be possible in any way.
«I’m sorry», he murmured. «What kind of a brother was I? Did I hurt you? I imagine I always wanted to be right».
He turned again, this time he managed to keep looking at him.
«Were we happy? Were we happy together? Where we really brothers? I know I did something at some point that disappointed you, but when it was different when it all started, right?».
He nodded, slowly.
«Do you want to talk to me? Do you feel like it?».
He struggled. «Lizzi has ordered me not to tell you anything. She’s doing it for you».
Mr. Orazio smiled. «Just talking, nothing else; I won’t make any questions».
He nodded once more.
«Does it bother you to see me like this? To know I’ve grown old, that I’m not what I used to be?».
«I already knew that».
«But you hadn’t seen me. Did I upset you?».
This time he did not say anything and Mr. Orazio continued: «What do you feel about me? Do I scare you? Are you scared of what I’ve become?».
He shook his head.
«You’re angry with me, I understand. You all are».
«No, no. Not me. I’m not angry at you, I understood. You couldn’t do anything else. I’m just sad, so sad».
«Because I’m about to die?».
He hesitated. «Because you no longer care about me; you haven’t cared about me for so long. In the beginning everything was different, we were always together, and we had a lot of fun. But then you grew tired, of me, of everyone else. We weren’t enough, we… you considered us your toys, just your toys».
Mr. Orazio froze agape. «And because of this…».
Bobo lowered his head. «I understand, he was different, he could give you everything that we lacked». His cheeks got covered by a light blush. «You know, I also liked him. Everyone liked him, even if we would’ve never admitted it».
He must have forgotten about Lizzi’s recommendations, because he was opening much more than he should have. Mr. Orazio felt he had arrived to a crucial point. «Who is he?».
The child’s eyes shimmered as if they were wet. «You know. Billy. Billy had changed everything».
«But dad, you can’t do this to me!».
There was so much sadness in his father’s eyes. «You know I don’t want to, but you have to understand this needs to be done. It’s just a temporary measure, until you lean to control yourself. You’ll see that it won’t be for a long time».
It was the end of the world for Orazio. They were depriving him of the TV! And it was even worse; his mother was putting all the books inside a box. She had even done that in the study, she had made them all disappear.
It was too much. He felt his eyes fill with tears and could not hold them back. «I’m trying dad, I’m trying everything I can. I want to stop it!».
The father put the TV on the ground and run to kneel in front of him. Even his smile was sad. He held his hand. «I know my child. Me and Mom don’t blame you, we see you’re trying. You have a special gift, Orazio, a marvelous gift. A gift only God could have given to you. But you don’t know how to use it yet, you’re too young. We have to help you. We’re doing it for you, remember, only for you».
The mother was behind him, hugging him and kissing his forehead. «You’ll accomplish great things, Orazio, one day you’ll change the world. We’re proud of you. You’ve never disappointed us»:
Those words made it all worse. How many times had he promised, but had not been capable of keeping those promises? He just could not do it.
«I can’t do it!», he squealed in tears. «I’m trying but I can’t do it!».
«We’re here to help you. You can do it, you’ll see. And as you grow older it’ll be much easier».
«What will be easier?».
The journey through the house continued. Lizzi and the red witch were always next to him, while flashbacks tormented him.
«To restrain yourself; to stop creating us».
«Did you annoy them?».
She burst in laughter. «Anno them? Haven’t you seen the house? We obviously annoted them! Your mother didn’t dare to enter the kitchen. The paintings spoke, the toys moved on their own. Every day there was something new. You were driving them insane!».
Mr. Orazio lowered his head.
«You started when you were four. Or maybe you’ve started even before that, but they did not notice. Anyways, when you were four they gave you YoYo. You adored that teddy bear, you always took him everywhere you went; and one day, YoYo started walking by himself. Your mother was certainly shocked, as you can imagine».
«I was a monster», Mr. Orazio murmured. «I’m a monster».
«They didn’t think that way. They truly thought it was a gift; a heavenly gift. The power of giving life to inanimate things; they were happy. In the beginning they didn’t even try to stop you. On the contrary, they filled you with toys. But it wasn’t easy, you had to be particularly interested in them for it to work, you had to love them, otherwise you couldn’t do it. And that’s how Ax and the magic train were born, and not just them».
She giggled. «It’s almost comical thinking about them now. At that time it was them who spurred you, who stimulated your powers. They were never satiated; every time you animated a toy they jumped in joy. It was a beautiful time for you and also for them. Then the troubles started».
Mr. Orazio had started to understand. «Oh».
«They made you see Mary Poppins and you created Ms. Peggy. She didn’t come out very well, but she was just the first. This was very different from animating a toy, you had created life where there was none. You had taken a concept, an image, an illusion and given life to it. There was Peggy, your housekeeper, reminding them every moment what you were capable of doing. Then it was Bobo’s turn».
«They didn’t love him».
She giggled again, and her voice became colder. «Loving him? They were scared of him. They were terrified of him. That’s natural if you think about it. They had to take school from you, you weren’t capable of being with the other children. Who knows what you could have created. And then they took the TV and the books from you. Everything; they took all the fantasy from you, because you could have transformed it in reality. They locked you in a cocoon; a cocoon of love, because they really loved you, but in a cocoon nevertheless. They didn’t see it as a prison, they were sure they were protecting you, and maybe that was true. They were convinced it wouldn’t be forever, that when you grew up you would have learnt to dominate your powers».
Her look was sincere. «They have truly loved you, you know? Even if I didn’t like them very much, I have to admit that it was all true. Anyone else would have been terrified of what you could do, but not them. They were proud of you, they have always been, and they have never stopped loving you, ever».
«They’re dead, aren’t they?».
She did not answer this time either.
Mr. Orazio preferred not to insist. «Then Billy came», he ventured.
Lizzi shook her head. «Then we came. It was a tough blow for them, specially your father. The situation became
unsustainable. Billy was just the last straw».
«What does it mean?».
«You’ll remember, don’t worry. You’re starting to remember everything».
«And when will it happen? If it should occur, what will happen?».
«Maybe nothing; or perhaps it’ll be even worse, who knows».
Mr. Orazio made the question that scared him the most. «What happened to my powers».
Because he was completely sure: those powers were no more, they had ceased to exist many years ago.
«You’ll remember this too», was Lizzi’s response.
However, he did not remember. They all had dinner together, and Mr. Orazio did not even complain about all those cakes, and then he retired to his room. But as hard as he strived to relax, not to think, no memories came to him.
Not even YoYo was there to keep him company, and when he turned the lights off he was completely alone.
13
«So you decided to come back!».
«Who… who are you?».
«Damn! How old you are! You look even older than Grandfather Agenore!».
«Are… are you a memory?».
«No, dammit! We’re talking, how can I be a memory?».
«You’re a dream then».
«Sure. I can’t be anything else, right? You know, you can’t really be sure, you can make strange things happen».
«But who are you?».
«You know perfectly well who I am».
«You’re dead».
«Then this just means this is a dream».
«I miss you, I miss you so much».
«Don’t lie! You’ve completely forgotten about me! How comfortable, eh? How comfortable to erase me from your mind, to forget about everything. Don’t you feel like a coward?».
«Do you hate me?».
«What? No, stupid. What’s going in your mind? Why should I hate you?».
«Did I… did I kill you? Are you dead because of me?».
«Wow! You really don’t remember anything!».
«No, no, nothing».
«How did you think of doing such a stupid thing?».
«Were we friends?».
«Can’t you remember that?».
«Were we?».
«Yes, we were».
Lizzi Bizzi and the Red Witch Page 5
