“Yeah.” Lee nuzzled Phil’s hair and loosened the grip of his arms around Phil’s body.
“I was afraid to answer you. But I’m not now.” Phil kissed Lee’s throat and rubbed his cheek against that soft and perfect chest. A pulse in Lee’s neck fluttered against his forehead. “I love you.”
Lee slowly tightened his arms around Phil and pulled his head up onto his shoulder. “Shit, make me cry, why don’t you.” Lee’s voice was thick, he sniffed a few times and then buried his face in Phil’s hair.
They lay there without moving for a long time, even after Phil felt sticky and had to pee like the proverbial racehorse. He didn’t want to talk about what he hadn’t done—what he hadn’t been able to do—because the last thing he wanted was to disappoint Lee. He had to give him time to get over it because if he saw in Lee’s eyes that he felt let down, it would wreck him.
FINALLY PHIL couldn’t stand it anymore and got up and went into the bathroom. They still had hours of alone time left, so he thought maybe they’d start again, but when he got back after rinsing out the washcloth and stashing the towels, Lee had fallen asleep. Phil debated pulling on his boxer briefs but eventually curled up beside Lee—skin on luxurious skin—and joined him. Just before he dropped off, he wondered if it would be easier or more difficult to sleep in the same bed after this.
PHIL WOKE up with his cheek resting on Lee’s chest and sighed. The light in the room hadn’t changed much, if at all, so he probably hadn’t slept longer than half an hour. Lee shivered, his arms tightening, pulling Phil closer, their breathing already starting to deepen with desire.
“Phil?”
Something in Lee’s tone tensed every muscle until they shook, and left Phil fighting tears.
“I just want to talk. But if you don’t want to… or if you can’t, it’s okay.”
Phil swallowed hard, and forced himself to breathe.
“Never mind.” Lee nuzzled his hair, kissed his forehead as he pulled Phil across his body.
“N-no. It’s okay. I… I’ve been thinking about what to say. About how… how to t-tell you about….”
“You know I love you, right?”
All the air left Phil’s lungs in a heartbeat, like the time he fell from a low tree limb and thought he was about to die. Only not. It took a moment before he could speak. “Shit, make me cry, why don’t you?”
Lee chuckled softly, but just for a second or two.
“Wh-what—” Phil almost asked what Lee wanted to know, but he knew.
He sighed and ran his hand down Lee’s side, over his amazing muscles and soft skin. His right arm tucked beneath him felt vague, numb from lying on it. His arm was sweaty and a little gross, but he just couldn’t uncover it, feel it against his side, and he didn’t want it to touch Lee either.
Shit.
Just thinking about that time, any time before he moved in with Jerry, made him feel less of a person, like he didn’t have a name anymore and was Hobbit, or kid, or hey you again. He wasn’t sure if he could go through with it, or what he would say that wouldn’t be too much.
“Are you okay? In general, I mean.” Lee’s voice was barely a whisper, tender and full of love. “I mean, you seem okay to me. Man, you seem more than o-kay, but—that’s all I’m asking, really.”
He relaxed a bit, and felt that much more like Phil. “I… I have p-panic attacks sometimes. Not as bad as they were, but, yeah….”
“When was the last one?”
He had just stopped trembling too. The air in Lee’s bedroom turned icy cold that fast and he could almost smell the damp salty air. “Right after the helicopter took you away.”
Lee
UNCLE LENNY dropped by a couple of weeks later on a Friday and asked where he should expect to find Lee on Monday morning for work. He half expected it, since he got the rubber-soled shoe deal to strap over his foot earlier in the week. The doctor said he was fine to walk with a cane, but he still hoped for more time. Lee had gotten used to hanging out with Phil all day and sleeping beside him at night, so he wished he could tell his uncle to go fly a kite. But the fracture of his fibula had been clean and was healing just fine, so he couldn’t say much.
When Phil left on Sunday afternoon, the temperature in the bedroom dropped noticeably without the heat he generated, but the worst part was the way his face had closed down while he was packing his things. Phil’s expression was almost blank, but blank would’ve been better than what Lee saw in his eyes. He tried to hide it—at least Lee was pretty sure he had—but after seeing those icy-blue eyes full of nothing but joy and love, it was as obvious as a kick to the nuts when the fear came back.
He didn’t want to let Phil leave, but what was he supposed to do? Force him to stay? Bring him to work? Uncle Lenny would love that. Phil had things to do, too—clients to contact and projects to finish.
He doesn’t have time to waste making me feel important.
MONDAY WAS hellish. Not only did Lee spend it away from Phil, but he wasn’t used to working—and Uncle Lenny didn’t go easy on anyone. Ever. He didn’t want to drop Lee off at his apartment—said he should go out to Willston where he was expected—but after a few hours of convincing, cajoling, and whining, he relented. Lee barely said two words to his roommate on the way through the living room and didn’t even eat dinner, just popped a few Advil and crashed on top of the covers in his slightly musty bedroom.
TUESDAY MORNING he called Phil, and at five thirty that afternoon was almost literally bowled over by him in Jerry’s driveway. It felt so good to be with Phil again, Lee wanted to pick him up and spin him around but the dull ache in his leg stopped him. They laughed through a few short but oh-so-sweet kisses, like it had been two weeks or months and not only two days since they’d been together.
Phil stopped laughing first and, thinking he’d have to let go of him soon, Lee squeezed tighter.
“Hey, how’d you get here?”
Lee kissed his neck, drawing another soft chuckle from Phil. “The bus.”
“The—” Phil pushed Lee away and looked down the street, first in one direction and then in the other. “How far did you walk?”
“Just a couple blocks. It’s no—”
“Big deal, yeah. Come with me.”
Phil gripped his hand and headed down the driveway. Lee smiled when he realized he wasn’t being pulled or rushed, just led. He followed Phil in the back door and through the kitchen.
“Sorry about the stairs. We can stay up here if—”
“It’s okay.” Lee smiled and hopped down the steps on his good foot.
“Show off.”
“It’s just faster.”
Lee shrugged and followed Phil through the first room, set up the way the garage had been the day he and Uncle Lenny fixed the pipe—stacks of Bankers Boxes, electronic equipment, and a shredder the size of a small dishwasher. The basement was fully finished. They went through a door to Phil’s living space and he pulled it closed behind them. He’d wondered what Phil’s place was like, for some reason he’d pictured it as being spare and reserved. Looking around at the photographs on the walls, the overstuffed bookshelves and brightly colored furniture, he wondered why.
“Sit.” When Lee moved toward the bed, Phil pointed to a round, bright orange chair in the corner under the casement window. It was a refugee from the seventies, just like most of Mom’s furniture. “Uh-uh. Here.”
“Yes, sir, Mr. Brask.”
He sat and tried to mask his relief to be off his feet but didn’t do a great job of it, especially after Phil pushed a matching ottoman over and patted the top. Lee settled in with his foot up, and before he could invite Phil to share the chair, he rested a hand on Lee’s toes and stole his voice.
“You’re not allowed to walk more than a half a block.” Phil’s tone was gentle but firm, and when he punctuated that sentence by softly rubbing his foot, Lee lost the will to argue and relaxed into the chair. “If there’s somewhere you need to go, call me and I’ll get you the
re.”
“It’s okay—” Lee sounded as breathless as he felt.
“Maybe you didn’t notice that wasn’t a question.” Phil sat on the ottoman and pulled Lee’s foot into his lap. The left corner of his mouth quirked into a smile when Lee sighed. “So I’ll say it again. You’re not to walk more than half a block. I’ll be your chauffer until you can drive again. I don’t work for free, though.”
Lee moaned softly and smiled, his eyes falling to half-mast. Phil continued the gentle massage of the parts of his foot that weren’t encased in the cast and boot.
“Don’t you have a job you’re working on?”
“Sure, but it’s not time sensitive. I’m getting you out of this cast as fast, and with as little pain, as possible.”
Phil slipped off the ottoman and perched on the arm of the chair. He caressed Lee’s cheek, turning his head toward him. “Do we have a deal?”
Lee nodded, slipped his arms around Phil’s waist, and rested his head against his chest.
“Don’t you want to know how I’m going to get paid?”
“Doesn’t matter. Whatever you want….”
Phil wrapped his arms around Lee’s shoulders, and Lee thought he felt a nuzzle on the top of his head.
“Be careful with sweeping pronouncements like that. You don’t know what I’m thinking of.”
“But I want to.” What he really wanted was to pull Phil onto his lap, rip all their clothes off, and leave him squirming and helpless with pleasure, but maybe not in that order.
“You can start by letting go of me.”
“You haven’t driven me anywhere yet. Maybe I don’t want to let go.”
Phil chuckled and Lee shivered when warm breath ruffled his hair.
“I don’t remember saying payment would be due after performance. Consideration is due on demand.”
Phil drew his palm along Lee’s shoulder and down his arm, sighing when he squeezed his triceps. Lee gasped when Phil moved his hand back up to his shoulder, under the fabric of his T-shirt. When Phil moved away, Lee reluctantly loosened his hold.
The ottoman was on wheels, and Phil rolled it away from the front of the chair, but not far enough to dislodge Lee’s foot. Lee moaned when Phil knelt on the floor in front of him, and again when he leaned against him and kissed him slowly, deeply, circling Lee’s tongue with his like a preview of coming attractions.
Lee didn’t have to wait long, after that kiss, Phil moved faster with every passing moment. He pulled at Lee’s shirt, and as soon as it was off, tossed it behind him without a glance, and dove forward to kiss a path down his abs. Phil’s hands shook as he slid the elastic waistband of Lee’s sweats down, and by the time his dick was free, both panted loudly in the otherwise silent room.
Phil sucked gently on the head until Lee raised his hips. After a long teasing moment, he opened his lips and let Lee fuck his mouth. A few strokes like that and Phil lowered his head, just a little, every time Lee pushed up. Lee fought the urge to bury both hands in Phil’s hair. He wanted to tangle his fingers, feel Phil’s head banging from both sides, but settled for watching as his hair bounced up and floated down.
Whoa, it’s getting long—it hardly even curls anymore.
Lee grunted with the effort to keep from grabbing Phil’s hair as he sped the pace. Almost like he’d been listening to a Tool song but then Metallica came on the radio. Lee smiled and pulled his good leg up over the arm of the little chair. More leverage meant more friction and—oh shit—and then Phil wrapped a hand around the inside of Lee’s hip. He gripped the crease where leg and ass met, massaging until Phil’s thumb found his hole. For a moment, that felt much longer than it could’ve been, time stopped, just like the hummingbird wings in Phil’s pictures. The moment ended when Phil gripped harder and traced a circle with his hot thumb, ripping a hoarse scream from Lee’s throat as he came.
“Oh shit,” Lee panted, his head lolled to the side, his ass hanging off the chair. He opened his eyes and saw the ottoman about four feet away, his casted foot barely hanging on to the corner.
Phil kissed Lee’s deflating prick and then turned away. He lifted his cast and slid the ottoman under Lee’s leg.
“Oh man, I think you should pay me now.”
“What?” All the happy disappeared from Phil’s face and his body got very still.
“You need to feel this good too.”
Lee leaned forward and rested a hand on Phil’s shoulder. When he didn’t look any less happy, Lee drew his palm down across his chest. He scooted a little more upright and then slipped his hand around Phil’s hip, drawing him closer. Phil shook his head but didn’t really seem to be saying no. After a careful moment spent watching Phil’s face for any sign he was going too far, Lee pushed his fingertips past the waistband of his jeans. Phil shivered, and he took that as a sign and opened the snap.
“Come up here?”
Phil turned his face up to Lee, panting through his beautiful swollen lips. When Lee slipped both hands under his arms and pulled, he didn’t resist. Lee kissed those luscious lips as he arranged Phil across his lap, and didn’t stop while he opened his pants. He was about to pull them off, but at the last minute just brought them down enough to get at Phil’s burning erection.
“Oh shit, you’re so hot.”
Lee grabbed a big handful of Phil’s ass and lifted until he could lick the glistening tip of his cock. When Phil moaned in response, Lee closed his lips over the head. He was tempted to move to the bed so he could watch Phil’s face—his gorgeous face—while he came, but didn’t want to stop sucking his dick to do it.
As though getting off had erased the tough workday, Lee lifted Phil in a faster and faster rhythm until he got close.
Much more fun than free weights.
It couldn’t end that fast, though, so he backed off, wrapped both arms around Phil’s hips, and squeezed him tightly against his chest while he licked the length of his shaft.
Phil hadn’t made a sound for what felt like a long time, so Lee opened his eyes to make sure he was okay. He could’ve spent hours licking and sucking Phil’s dick. Not exactly small, it fit very nicely into his mouth, the head just pushing against the back of his throat every time his lips brushed Phil’s groin. The look on Phil’s face made Lee feel ten feet tall and bulletproof. Maybe for the first time, their eyes met with his dick halfway down Lee’s throat and Phil wasn’t afraid at all. No fear. No tension. Nothing but desire, lust, need.
Lee smiled around his mouthful, and just as he started on a new downbeat, the outer door opened.
A violent tremor wracked Phil’s body, and Lee lowered him onto his lap, pulling him close to shield as much of his nudity from the doorway as he could. Phil curled around Lee’s body. He didn’t pull away; in fact, he held on tight.
“Phil? Are you down here?” Jerry opened the door and was a few steps inside before he saw them in the chair and stopped. “Oh. Sorry guys.”
Jerry turned, but instead of leaving, he wiped a hand across his face and then gripped the back of his neck with it. “I didn’t know you were here, Lee. How are you feeling?”
“Um… good.”
“I meant your leg.” Jerry shook his head and grinned. He made eye contact with Lee for a second and then turned to look out the open door.
“Oh. It’s okay, thanks.”
“Dinner’s just about finished. Come on up when you’re ready to eat.”
Nobody moved for a long moment. Lee started to get a bad feeling in his gut, so he squeezed Phil tighter and gently rubbed his back.
“Th-thanks, Jerry. W-we’ll be up s-soon.”
Jerry nodded and left, closing the doors behind him just loudly enough so they could hear both clicks from where they sat.
Lee waited for something from Phil, a signal to let him know what to do next, but he just clung to him and trembled. Lee adjusted Phil so his head rested on his chest. That seemed to relax him a little, but except for his dick, he was still very tense. That had lost its steam
before Jerry even said a word. Lee’s stomach rumbled before he could figure out what to say or do, and he had to admit the smell of chicken Jerry had let in made his mouth water almost as much as what he’d been doing before.
“I-I’ll go get us d-dinner.”
Phil didn’t move for another few minutes, but then all at once, he sighed heavily and stopped shaking. He slid to the floor and before Lee knew what was happening, Phil’s clothes looked like he’d never loosened them, as if the twenty or so minutes before Jerry burst through the door had never happened. A sad little weight came to rest in his stomach.
“You don’t have to wait on me. I’ll go with you.”
Phil’s gaze drew up from the floor, he seemed to shiver and look away from Lee’s spent dick. Lee pulled his sweats up and scooted to the edge of the chair. Phil pushed the ottoman back in front of the chair and came around to the side. He stood still for a few seconds and then combed his fingers through Lee’s hair, easing his head back against the chair as he did.
“You worked all day.” Phil’s mouth quirked into half a smile, and even though it shook, it dissolved the lump in Lee’s gut. “I-it’s okay. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
Lee smiled up into those beautiful icy-blue eyes, glad and relieved to see the fear had vanished. He was embarrassed, but who wouldn’t be? Lee still couldn’t let himself think about the time Becca had let herself into his bedroom while he was beating off to a hot scene in a romance novel—not if he wanted to get over it inside a week—and that had been almost eight years ago. Phil’s hand tightened in his hair, bringing his full attention back in his direction. That fast, Lee was practically overcome with want. He gripped the arms of the chair so hard his arms shook. Phil bent over and placed a short, sweet kiss on Lee’s lips and when he pulled back and saw Lee’s reaction, a grin took over his face.
Nesting Habits Page 10
