Rachel noticed that her son was already coming their way, the smell of pizza luring him like the Pied Piper's pipe. “Hi,” he said.
“Hi,” said Chad, and introduced himself, offering a hand for David to shake, which, well-mannered child that he was, he did.
“What kind of pizza is that?” asked David.
“Four-cheese,” answered Chad.
“Awesome,” said David, following him into the house.
The girls weren't above taking a break from their movie to snag some pizza, so Rachel made casual introductions as they got glasses from the cupboard and hunted down plates. She found herself feeling oddly embarrassed, like she'd been caught doing something naughty. She had nothing to be ashamed of, she reminded herself. She wasn't the one who had split up the family. Still, it somehow seemed unfaithful to the cause of motherhood for her to have found a boyfriend in her children's absence. What if they didn't like him? (They meaning Claire, since David's affections could easily be bought with a pizza.)
The girls wandered back to the family room to watch TV and David joined them, sprawling on the floor.
“Would you like to go out on the patio?” Rachel suggested after she'd handed Chad a glass of lemonade.
“Sure,” he said, giving her an intimate smile.
As she followed him out she heard Bethany ask Claire in a low voice, “Is that like your mom's new boyfriend?”
“I guess,” said Claire.
“He's sooo cute.”
“He's okay.”
Rachel was happy to settle for okay. Okay was a good place to begin. In fact, it was a perfect place since she had no idea what kind of ending her story was moving toward.
• 24 •
By mid-August Chad had found renters for his house and Rachel had new neighbors. David was in Michael Jordan heaven because he suddenly had two boys right next door who lived to shoot hoops. Their mother, frazzled from juggling a part-time job with raising two active sons and a preschool daughter, was happy to sign the boys up to attend basketball camp with David.
It was nice to have neighbors, but Rachel found herself half wishing the house next door was still empty and in need of repair. Now there was no reason for Chad to stay in Heart Lake. Except her, and was she really a good enough reason? “I suppose you'll be moving on to build your real estate empire,” she said when he called her later that week.
“Not yet,” he said. “I've got the place on the lake for as long as I want.”
Ah, yes, the mysterious friend's house. Much as she and Chad had been hanging out together, he'd never taken her there.
“Nice friend.” A nasty thought flickered in Rachel's mind. What if the friend was a woman? Was that why Chad hadn't ever invited her over, because he was playing two women at once?
“Yeah, he is.”
He. The nasty little thought vanished with a satisfying poof. But Rachel was still left wondering why Chad hadn't invited her over.
She imagined the place to be one of the little cabins left over from the days when the lake was an undiscovered summer get-away, nestled in among the trees, hiding from the finer homes that had been built in the last fifteen years. Maybe his humble living quarters embarrassed him. Maybe he was embarrassed by his circumstances in general. All their dates had been fun yet inexpensive. They had done everything from the occasional dinner at his sister's restaurant to bicycling around the lake or meeting for coffee at the Sweet Somethings bakery, and, of course, he had been at her place often enough. Maybe she'd have to come right out and ask him about that. She should probably come right out and ask him about his finances. Period. He was always so vague about his business, preferring to keep their conversations centered on movies or books, her life, or just life in general, making it obvious that he didn't want to share.
But times were tough for lots of people. If he was in the process of rebuilding his life, he could certainly admit it to her. She understood about rebuilding, and she didn't care how much money he made. She'd learned from her experience with Aaron that the size of a man's bank account was far less important than the size of his heart. And if this relationship was going to keep going, they had to be honest with each other.
When he called to invite her family to the North County fair, she accepted, but said bluntly, “Only if we pay our own way in. County fairs can get expensive.”
“Don't worry,” he assured her. “I can afford it.”
“Can you?” she countered.
“If I couldn't I wouldn't have asked you.”
“Okay,” she said doubtfully. Male pride was a dangerous thing.
She let him pay their way in, but once they hit the midway she sent David and Claire to buy ride tickets with their allowance money.
“Actually,” said Chad, holding up a hand to stop them, “I'm picking up the tab for the day.” He gave both kids a twenty-dollar bill.
“Cool,” said David.
“Thanks,” said Claire, smiling around her new braces.
Rachel didn't say anything. Instead, she stood bug-eyed while her children darted to the ticket booth.
Chad cocked an eyebrow at her. “Why are you looking so surprised?”
“Because that's a lot of money.”
He smiled and put an arm around her. “It's okay to splurge once in a while. And I figure since this is the first time I've gone out with you and your kids I should make a good impression.”
“In other words, buy their affection?” teased Rachel.
“Why not?”
“Because it's not necessary. You didn't need to buy mine,” said Rachel.
“That's one of the things I love about you,” he said, and gave her a kiss that sent her insides whirling. “I suspect your kids are a harder sell,” he added. “Anyway, you can't go to the fair and not go on the rides. Come on,” he said, steering her toward the ticket booth. “Let's get some tickets for us. I'm sure you want to ride the Ferris wheel.”
“And go through the fun house,” Rachel decided.
“And the roller coaster.”
“Not so much.”
He gave her a squeeze. “It'll be okay. I'll hold onto you so you don't fly out.”
“What if we both fly out?”
“Then I'll pull out my Superman cape and take us to safety,” he said with a grin and gave her another kiss, and she found herself believing he could probably do just that.
She loved following Claire and David through the fun house, maneuvering over shifting floors and standing next to Chad in front of mirrors that distorted their reflections. Riding the Ferris wheel felt like living a scene from one of her romance novels as she felt herself whisked up, up, and around, cuddled next to Chad. As they dangled at the top of the wheel with the fairgrounds spread out in all its country glory around them and, in the distance, the Cascade Mountains, still wearing a snowy shawl, he pulled her close to him and kissed her.
Eyes closed, she murmured, “That was perfect. Every girl should get kissed at the top of a Ferris wheel.”
“Especially this one,” he said, and kissed her again.
But as they sat in back of Claire and David on the roller coaster, clack-clacking their way up the track, she experienced a very different feeling. “I hate these things,” she muttered, grabbing the bar in front of her. Anything could happen on a roller coaster.
Up and down, whipping around corners at breakneck speed, if something broke, if somehow the little train of cars disconnected from the track …
Chad gave her shoulders a squeeze. “Rides like this are only an illusion. You're probably in more danger when you're driving your car.”
Rachel barely had time to retort, “I don't drive like this,” before they plummeted. Then all she could do was grit her teeth and hang on for dear life. When the ride finally ended, she walked away on shaky legs.
“Let's go again,” said David, bouncing in front of her, grinning.
“I am never going on that thing again. Let's go look at the pigs.”
“Aw,
Mom. We still have tickets left,” David protested.
“How about we let them finish up and I'll buy you a scone?” suggested Chad.
Much to her children's delight, she let him distract her with a simple biscuit wrapped around jam. She was so easy.
Later he bought her children hamburgers and cotton candy, and then he took them all to a concert featuring a popular country band. By the time they drove back to Heart Lake in his Mustang to the sound of soft rock on the radio it was dark. David was snoring in the back seat, Claire was texting, and Rachel was thinking how family-like this moment felt.
She could see this man as part of their family, could envision them driving home from similar outings, unspoken contentment hanging in the air. Was that where they were going with this relationship? She hoped so.
The next week Rachel convinced the children that it would be a great idea to pick blackberries to add to her stockpile in the freezer.
“I'll make you a pie,” she promised.
That had been all it took to send David looking for a pot. Claire went with a little less enthusiasm, but she went.
As they stood at the edge of the berry patch, filling their pots with fat, juicy berries, the morning sun warming their backs, Claire casually asked, “So is Chad your boyfriend?”
There, indeed, was the question of the day. “What would you think if he was?”
Claire gave a one-shouldered shrug. “It'd be okay, I guess.”
David, who had already lured Chad into shooting baskets with him on several occasions, added, “He's cool.”
“Anyway, Daddy's got Misty,” said Claire. “You should have someone.”
Rachel found herself pleasantly surprised. Very magnanimous. And she couldn't have said it better.
“I'm going over to Sam's for a minute. He wants help timing his carburetor,” Brian said, giving Tiffany a kiss on the cheek.
“Have fun,” she said, logging onto her eBay account as he wandered off. He'd be at the neighbor's getting greasy for the rest of the day. But that was okay because she had things to do herself. After finishing up she'd be off to Jess's house for her weekly finance pep talk. She could hardly wait to share how well her business was doing.
Up popped her list of current bids. Good. Everything was selling and the bids on several items had gone up. And it was only Saturday. By tomorrow she'd be raking in the money, which was a good thing, considering the fact that her number of nail clients had dropped. They'd be okay though. Come fall her first charge card would be paid off. Then she only had one more to go. Maybe, if she worked really hard and if Brian didn't lose his job, by next summer they could afford a project car for him.
She was logging off when her phone rang. It was her mother, calling for her weekly check-in. Tiffany happily picked up and told her all about her latest moneymaking triumphs.
“Your father will be so pleased,” said Mom. “Now I have some news for you. Cressie's pregnant.”
Her baby sister was pregnant? Cressie had only been married a year. How was that possible?
This would be a good time to say something. “Oh, wow. I'm happy for her,” said Tiffany. She was. She'd run right out and buy a present to prove it.
“It would be nice if you could call her. I think she was a little hesitant to tell you for fear of making you feel bad.”
“I can't feel bad that we're going to have a new baby in the family,” Tiffany said as much to herself as her mother.
“That's what I told Cressie.”
Tiffany felt like her throat was closing up, but she said, “I'll call her. Tell her I'll have a baby shower for her.”
“You could tell her yourself,” suggested Mom.
“I will. But right now I have to go. I'm late for my money club.”
Tiffany managed to say the proper good-byes and I-love-you's, but by the time she hung up she was close to hyperventilating. “You'll have a niece,” she told herself. “That's awesome.” She'd be a supportive sister and a fab aunt. Obviously, the universe thought she'd be a much better aunt than a mother. The universe was right, of course. She'd already decided she wasn't ready for motherhood so there was no reason to feel sorry for herself. And she was happy for her sister. Happy.
“Where's Tiff?” asked Rachel as she and Jess settled on Jess's deck with their iced tea. “I thought she'd be over here already, bragging about her garage sale finds.”
Jess checked the wall clock. Tiff was her usual fifteen minutes late. “I'll call her.” The second Tiffany answered the phone Jess could tell she'd been crying. “Oh, no. What's happened? Did Brian lose his job?”
“No. Everything's fine,” Tiffany insisted, her voice watery.
“I can tell. You'd better get over here right away. We've got iced tea and Rachel brought day-old donuts from the bakery.”
“Actually, I have to go run an errand.”
Jess covered the mouthpiece. “She says she has to run an errand,” she reported to Rachel. “She's been crying.”
“Keep her talking,” said Rachel, and took off.
“We could run errands with you,” Jess suggested. “You know, save on gas.”
“That's okay,” said Tiffany. “I'll catch up with you guys next week.”
Jess was still scrambling around for a way to keep her talking when Tiffany hung up.
Tiffany had her purse and was at the door when Rachel walked through it.
“What's going on?” Rachel demanded. Her eyes narrowed at the sight of Tiffany's purse. “Were you going shopping?”
“Just to get a baby present.” How could she not get a baby present? She had to get a baby present. Right now. And … who knew what else? “My sister's pregnant, and I'm so happy for her,” Tiff added, blinking furiously to keep back the tears.
Rachel's angry teacher expression melted away. “Aw, come here, you,” she said and gathered Tiffany into a hug.
“I'm happy for her. I really am,” Tiffany insisted, tears making her voice uneven.
“I know you are,” said Rachel, patting her back.
“I hate myself for being jealous. What kind of horrible woman gets jealous cuz her own sister is pregnant?”
“You wouldn't be human if you weren't a little green-eyed,” Rachel assured her. “Come on over to Jess's and have a donut.”
“I should get a present,” insisted Tiffany. She had to show Cressie how happy she was for her.
“Uh, no. Not in your condition you shouldn't. You'll go on a spending spree.”
Tiffany pulled away and rubbed her face.
“Her baby's not due for months, right?”
Tiffany bit her lip and nodded.
Rachel gave a knowing nod. “So, come January we'll go to the children's department together and get something awesome on sale. Okay?”
Tiffany took a deep breath. “Okay.”
“Now, do you need to call her?”
“I can't. I'll cry and she'll think I'm not happy for her.”
“No, you won't,” Rachel said sternly. “Because you're going to be thinking that soon it will be your turn.”
It was impossible to go there. Tiffany's throat closed up and she shook her head.
“You'll be thinking how much fun you're going to have spoiling your niece. Or nephew. Sleepovers, movies— if it's a boy Brian can teach him how to work on cars. If it's a girl you can give her pedicures. You're going to have so much fun. And none of the expense. Or the gray hairs.” Rachel looked her in the eye to see if she was getting through.
Tiffany nodded.
“Come on, get the phone,” urged Rachel.
Tiffany fetched the phone and dialed. The line started ringing and her heart sped up.
Her sister answered. “Tiff, did Mommy tell you?”
“Yeah, she did. I'm so happy for you,” said Tiffany, and even as the words came out of her mouth she realized she was.
“Did Mommy tell you I want you to be the baby's godmother?”
“A godmother?” Tiffany breathed.
&n
bsp; “We're not sure yet what we're having, but we had the ultrasound and we think it might be a girl.”
“A girl.” Tiffany had always wanted a girl. Girls were so much fun. “Perfect.”
“So, will you?”
Maybe a godmother was all she'd ever be, but so what? She'd be the best godmother in the entire world. “Of course,” Tiffany said.
“I'm so excited,” gushed Cressie.
“Me, too,” Tiffany said, assuring them both. “I'm going to throw you an awesome baby shower. And names! You'll need to start thinking about names. I'll get you a baby name book. And I can help you set up a nursery.”
“You're the best sister ever,” gushed Cressie. “My child is going to be so lucky to have you for a godmother.”
They exchanged I-love-you's and I'll-call-you's and then Tiffany hung up. “Wow, I'm going to be a godmother,” she said to Rachel.
Rachel nodded solemnly. “It's a huge honor. People don't ask just anyone to be a godmother, you know.”
Tiffany nodded, internalizing that. The main reason she'd wanted to be a mother was so she could have a child to love, a little someone to give herself to. She could give herself to her sister's baby. Cressie would share the love.
“You'll be a great godmother,” Rachel predicted. “Come on. Let's go tell Jess the good news.”
Tiffany followed her friend out the door, tossing her purse on a nearby chair as she left the house. She wouldn't be needing it.
• 25 •
“Back-to-school shopping season is almost here,” moaned Rachel, accepting a latte from Tiffany as the three women settled in at Tiffany's house for their weekly session. The era of the spitting espresso machine was behind them and Tiff had become a true barista. Rachel took a sip of her latte and sighed. “Taste bud heaven.”
“It's my latest invention: white chocolate and caramel,” said Tiff.
“You were so right to keep that espresso maker,” said Rachel. Hey, she could admit when she was wrong.
Tiff beamed. “I'm good.”
Small Change Page 20
