Cal didn’t seem to mind. What surprised me even more was when he laughed, swiped a napkin from the booth, and then reached over and cleaned up whatever I missed. His hand hung midair afterwards, and his face fell when he realized what he had done. Stunned, I sat there unable to take my eyes off him.
He obviously felt comfortable enough to do that with me. We had to have been that close. I wondered if John would have done something like that for me.
“Umm. I’m sorry. I…”
“Don’t be. It seems like that was something you’d have done before.”
He swallowed and looked down at his sandwich. “Yeah,” he replied, letting out a breath.
Awkward silence filled our booth. The sounds around us were crystal clear all of a sudden. The bustle of the restaurant, the chatter from the other booths…all of it I hadn’t noticed a moment before.
Cal wiped his mouth quickly and cleared his throat. “You were going to tell me why you didn’t call us back.”
“Oh, right.” I turned and dug into my purse, pulling out my cell phone. Placing it on the table, I clicked on the phone icon and then the voicemails button. “There’s nothing there.”
“That can’t be. I know I called you every five seconds.”
“John got me a new phone. He said my old phone was destroyed.”
I made the mistake of saying my husband’s name. After I’d told Cal I was married and saw the reaction, I’d tried to keep things simple so as not to upset him. And then I went and said it. And I could tell it affected him. His jaw was back to being worked over, and the noise in the restaurant seemed to dissipate compared to the sound of each of his knuckles cracking.
I cleared my throat, hoping to try to change the subject a little. “See? No messages.” I turned the phone so he could see. “Do you think if they were deleted there’s a way to recover them?”
“What would be the point? You’re already here.” He gave a faint smile, but I knew it still stung. “He must have deleted them all. If I had been in his shoes, I might have done the same.”
So then John must have known about Cal. “You said Lana called too? Why would he erase her messages too?”
He shook his head. “Not sure. But if I were him, I’d probably do that too. Right after I beat up the son of a bitch.” His jaw turned to steel. That’s when his phone rang out.
Shaking, I reached for my water, wondering if by some strange, horrible coincidence it was John who was calling him. Which…How on earth, even if he did know about Cal, would he know his number too? As he spoke, I tried to refrain from eavesdropping.
The sound of his flip phone snapping shut brought my attention to his phone. Compared to mine, his seemed ancient.
Getting up from the booth, he said, “I’m sorry. There’s been an accident down at the construction site and I need to get down there.” Construction. He worked in construction. Why hadn’t I thought to ask what he did for a living?
I nodded and blindly stood up as he reached for his wallet and threw money on the table. Oddly, I wanted to fight him about who should pay. After all, I broke his heart.
As I was about to refuse, he handed me a business card. “Call me. And I mean that. Day or night. Okay?”
Swallowing, I nodded as I took it from his hand and then glanced back up at him. Both of us went for each other at the same time, and I knew I wanted to but was unsure if he did. Feeling his arms around me again was pure comfort. Maybe it was that I hadn’t let John touch me yet, but that connection with another person, for the second time that day—it was incredible. Or maybe it was the person whose arms were around me providing the comfort.
Staring after him as he left in a hurry out the door, I wanted to run after him. I wanted…more of him.
Briefly, my eyes scanned the card full of information about Callum Wallace. I pressed my lips together, my heart heavy with hope. I now had a way to keep in contact with this man who knew so much about me.
The problem was, I had really wanted him to be part of my future. And I barely knew him.
The soft petal of the rose grazed my fingertip as I went to drop Cal’s card in my purse. I wasn’t sure why I’d grabbed the flower from our table or why I felt like I needed it.
Holding it in my hand gave me some sort of warmth. The fragrance tickled my nose the moment I brought it to my face. The scent was familiar, although of course, I couldn’t place it. Maybe it was sappy of me to think, but after meeting Cal and the way he’d stirred emotions inside of me, I felt like I had a reason to hope my memories would return.
Holding the fragrant flower, I wandered the sidewalk, not thinking about where I was headed until I came across a bench. The wood was worn and faded, but still looked inviting. Its wrought iron sides could have also used a touchup. It even creaked when I sat down.
With the short stem of the rose between my fingertips, I swirled it around and thought of Cal. Not my husband. But Cal. The strength of his arms wrapped around me, the warmth of his breath against my hair. The mere thought of him heated my insides, and yet at the same time I was hit by the realization that I might never see him again. That saddened me more than I cared to admit.
All the information swirled in my mind. I had so much to process, and what was I going to tell John? Was I going to tell him about finding Cal? At the same time, I wanted to remember every detail Cal had told me. Everything he’d recounted was like a breath of fresh air—completely opposite of my stale world inside the high-rise condo. It was obvious why I’d had an affair with him.
A store caught my eye when I glanced beyond the rose and across the street—a stationery store—and it was then I knew what I needed.
Clutching my new journal to my chest, the pink rose pressed between its pages, I smiled. It wasn't because I had entered the quiet condo. No, that filled me with an emptiness that felt too familiar already. I smiled because I was going to write down every last detail I had learned so far. If I couldn't remember it before, I'd make sure I never forgot it again.
Not only did I write down my new information, but also the questions I still had, the ones that bothered me the most. I wrote it all down, hoping to make sense of everything.
Reading back through the scribbled pages, there seemed to be nothing but questions. If I was confused before, I was even more so then. Outside the floor-to-ceiling window, the lights above the city became more apparent as the sky darkened, and all I could do was wish for more answers.
Right then the largest problem I had was broaching the subject with John to find out if he knew about Cal. Surely asking my husband if he knew about my boyfriend would set him off. What was John like when he was angry? Did I want to know? What was I thinking? Of course I couldn’t bring up that subject. Add “crazy” to the list of things wrong with me.
"What are you doing sitting there in the dark?" John’s voice sliced through the quiet in the condo.
My pen tumbled to the floor as I fumbled to grab it.
Lights flicked on as John walked in through the entrance and then began to flip every light switch on the panel before stopping to stare at me.
"I guess I lost track of time." I stood quickly, and my body shook as I faced the man I had been having an affair on.
I watched as he nodded, avoided my eyes, and turned to walk toward the hallway.
There had been silence before, but now it was laced with tension that scared me. Did he know I had seen Cal earlier in the afternoon? Had he known about my affair? Or had we always been like this when he came home from work?
I glanced back to the photos on the mantle and picked one up, staring at it and seeing the happy couple in the frame. We had been happy at one point in time. When had it ended? Had it? Or had I kept up some charade before my accident?
As if by instinct, I ran my hand over my stomach. It wasn't only me now; there was a little person that depended on me to provide a happy life for him or her. Especially now that I questioned who the father might be.
There was a whole page in my
journal scribbled with dates and timelines. Since I only had estimates of when I met Cal, I didn’t have any conclusions. I had no idea who the father of my baby might be.
Exhausted with all those thoughts, I began walking down the hallway toward my bedroom. Passing the master suite, I overheard John whispering with a harsh tone. My breath caught as my guilt swallowed me, and I wondered if he somehow knew who I had been with earlier.
The words became clearer as I approached the doorway and stood outside the frame. Add eavesdropping to my list of things I wondered if I had done before.
”No, she doesn’t know anything."
I stared at the white wood door, holding my breath so as not to make a sound while listening to the smallest noises from inside the room.
"I told you, she won’t.” His voice was so agitated I could almost picture how red his face must have been, and I continued to try to sort out the reason for his conversation and who he was both speaking with and about.
"I’ll figure this out. Stay out of it."
The floor creaked as I took a step, wanting to be able to hear better, but the moment it made that sound, I turned quickly and walked down the hall toward my room. I was about to open my door when I heard him say, "Hey. How was your day?"
Stunned for a moment, I finally turned toward him and pasted on a small smile. “Good. I went for a walk.” I knew I would have to tiptoe around the issue of Cal, but I figured Lana might be someone he might know.
"Oh? How was it?"
"Well, a woman called out to me. She called me 'Andi.’”
One brow raised as his eyes flitted about the room. "Andi? Well, I suppose your name could be shortened to that as a nickname. Who was the woman?"
"I wasn't sure and she was in a pretty big hurry. Her name was Lana.”
John paused for a moment, and his eyes dropped to the floor briefly but then shot back to mine. "Doesn’t sound familiar. Did she say anything…else?”
His question was apprehensive, and after all the information that was running through my mind, I swore he was up to something. “No. Well, yes. Actually.” I thought immediately to what Cal had told me, and even though it wasn’t Lana who had mentioned it, I needed to know. “Did I…Did I have a job?”
He laughed. “A job? No. You didn’t have any need to work.” His expression dropped and then the air in the hallway shifted completely as he walked toward me.
My face paled as I wondered if he knew who else I had seen that day. Utter confusion spread through me when he placed his hands on my arms and slid them up and down. The feel of his hands was the complete opposite of how I felt when Cal had his hands on me earlier. My initial reaction was to pull away.
“I’ve got a small surprise for you.”
I swallowed, my nervousness only slightly less than before since his expression was hopeful. “You do?”
He smiled as he raised his hand, and a set of keys dangled from the ring encircling his index finger. “I bought you a new car.”
My brows pulled up. “A new one?”
“Mhmm. I didn’t want to chance you and our baby getting hurt if they didn’t fix your other one correctly. I thought a new car would be best.”
What woman wouldn’t smile about that? He wanted to make sure his wife and child were protected and taken care of. Yet the moment I touched the keys, my stomach dropped. Suddenly I had a piercing vision of my body being smashed into the door and my head slamming into the driver’s side window. I faltered, quickly grabbing John’s arm for balance.
“Are you all right?” He guided me to a nearby chair and crouched next to me, awaiting my answer with his hand on my thigh.
“I…saw it. Or felt it, rather. The weight of the car slamming into my side door, glass shattering as my head bounced. The smell.” My eyes found John’s. “It smelled like gasoline fumes.”
I had barely finished my sentence when John wrapped me in his arms, rocking me, his expensive cologne immediately taking away the memory of the gasoline fumes that had permeated my senses. “Did you see the other car? Remember anything about it?”
“No.” I shook my head, which was buried deep into his shoulder, and felt him exhale. While I nuzzled into his shoulder, the comfort of his arms was nothing like what I had experienced earlier with Cal. Cal’s strength and broad shoulders were pure contentment. John’s only filled an immediate need. The guilt of preferring my lover’s embrace to my husband’s was overwhelming.
John pulled back, staring at me with his green eyes filled with concern. My remorse couldn’t have been worse, and I immediately turned away, unable to meet his gaze.
“Thank you.” I wasn’t sure if I was thanking him for the car or for trying to console me. Choosing to focus on his gift, I completely dismissed all my emotions surrounding the vision of the accident from moments before. The memories weren’t entirely erased, but for the time being I needed to push them aside and concentrate on the new car. “Would…” I swallowed, shoving down my new anxiety. “You mind if you drove it for me?”
He smiled, holding my hand and squeezing it. ”How about we take it out for short drive? We could go out for a nice dinner."
Although I’d been in a car since my accident, the desire to get into my car wasn’t there. However, this wasn’t exactly my old car, was it? It was a new one. Brand new. I could do it. For John and for the sake of attempting to squash the guilt of my affair, I needed to do it. “I…um, yes. Yes. Of course,” I answered quickly. It would be a nice change compared to the past few days when we had sat in odd silence eating our dinners that had been left for us by Adelia.
My arms tingled as I realized that maybe he’d had a tough time at work and had no idea about my affair. He had briefly mentioned some type of merger, and maybe that had been on his mind lately. Add in his wife’s accident, amnesia, and pregnancy, John was probably anguished like I was. The happy couple in the photos was us and probably still could be. But after meeting Cal that afternoon, did I want that? Was there a spark between John and I that I couldn’t feel yet?
"Did I used to like to go out to dinner?" I asked with a small smile, attempting to hide my infidelity—that I didn't really remember committing.
The corner of his mouth turned up. "Yes. You actually liked it very much." He let out a breath. "How about we go out and I'll tell you more about us."
There was a spark to John's eyes I hadn't seen before. Knowing how I had hurt Cal earlier in the day and John seeming to want our relationship to work, guilt stabbed at me.
What if this was fate’s way of trying to steer me back to my husband? Maybe this was our second chance. If this baby was John’s, shouldn’t I try?
Ten
Cal
An onsite fire, a forklift falling over because the idiot didn’t figure out how much the slab of concrete weighed before moving it, and a guy walking into a pit of mud and debris because he wasn’t looking where he was going. And I wasn’t there to supervise. I was with Andi when all that occurred. I rushed back to the site, cursing myself the whole time.
By the time I got home, my whole afternoon felt like a blur. I’d say my day, but the morning and my lunch with Andi had made all of the bullshit in my afternoon seem a little less. I knew if I'd been where I should have been, those things wouldn't have happened. Yet because I wasn't, I knew that Andi was safe. That, at least, gave me some relief. Not in my arms, but at least she wasn’t in some hospital needing help—or even worse, dead.
Alone in my apartment, I grabbed a beer from my fridge. For close to a week, I’d been searching frantically for Andi and now she was…well, shit, she was with her husband. I shook my head as I took a drink and pulled out my phone, hoping there’d be at least a missed call from her.
Why hadn’t I double checked her phone number? Damn it, her phone sat right there in front of me, and I didn’t check to see if she had the same number. Probably because I was technology-challenged. If Alex had been there, he’d have known how to find out if she could recover deleted voice mail
s. Hell, he’d probably be able to track who deleted them. He always teased me relentlessly about my old phone and how ancient it was. I refused to upgrade for the simple reason that I didn’t need all that other bullshit. I didn’t want the hassle of the apps and whatnot.
My ancient phone lay on my coffee table—the huge wooden one that Andi had said would make the room perfect. She was right, too. Although she wasn’t fond of my old couch, it worked with this coffee table. I looked up at the painting hanging on my wall.
I’d told her she could redo the whole place if she’d move in with me. But she wouldn’t. Looking back, it made sense. She was married, so that was the reason she couldn’t. All the conversations sifted through my thoughts, and I realized why she had really wanted to keep her tiny apartment—although it was odd that a married woman would have an apartment. Maybe she wanted freedom, a taste of being on her own—and after knowing a little more about her parents, I could understand that. Yet Lana had told me when we searched for Andi, that Andi had called the guy she went out with her “ex.” Why would she call him that and now come to find out she’s still married? Nothing was adding up.
In the quiet of my apartment alone with my thoughts, the sound of my cell phone ringing made me jump. The cold slosh of liquid ran over my hand as I placed the bottle on the coffee table. Shaking off the excess beer, I picked up my phone to answer it. It had to be Andi, right?
Until I looked at the number and knew it wasn’t her but another woman: Andi’s best friend, Lana. We’d been in back-and-forth communication hoping to find Andi. I should have called her right after I found Andi, or even after I’d walked in the door a few minutes ago.
The moment I picked up the phone, I had to hold it away from my ear. The woman was a wonderful person, but man, she had a set of lungs on her.
“Cal! Oh Cal, I was going to call you, but then got stuck having to take this shift and Kyle is not happy about it at all. I mean, he flew down here and they couldn’t—“
“Lana,” I interrupted her. Lana was sweet as anything, but she didn’t stop talking sometimes. “I found Andi.”
Accidents Happen (Forever Happens Book 1) Page 6
