by Lisa Sanchez
Too anxiety-ridden to carry on any kind of conversation, I sat in silence while Martha and Jess did their best to try and pull me from my funk. I was surrounded with flowers, chocolate and the latest celebrity gossip magazines, none of which held my interest in the least. I wanted to be left alone. I wanted to sulk. I wanted Quinn.
“I’m sorry, guys. I just want to be alone. Do you mind?” I felt bad sending them away, but I felt even worse pretending to be interested when I wasn’t. Not to mention, I’d never been the type of person who could pretend to be happy when I wasn’t. I was a terrible liar and an even shittier actress.
“No, that’s okay,” Martha said, and bit her lip. “I need to head back soon anyway. I’ve got a test I need to study for. Oh, and hey…I managed to get notes from the lectures you missed and the homework assignments for each of your classes, that way you can catch up once you’re out of here.” She flashed me an encouraging smile.
“Thanks, Martha.” I cast her a halfhearted smile. School was the last thing on my mind at the moment, but I couldn’t tell her that. Not after she’d gone to so much trouble. “I really appreciate it.”
“No problem. I’ll catch you tomorrow then,” she said before leaving Jessica and me alone in the room.
“I don’t like seeing you like this, Ryann.” Jessica grabbed her purse and stood up from her chair. “It’s not like you to just roll over and give up.”
“Give up? How am I giving up?”
“I can see it in your eyes. You’re already preparing yourself for failure. You’ve already accepted defeat before you’ve even tried to help Quinn.”
“I’m scared, Jess. I know this is going to sound a tad melodramatic, but I don’t think I can live without him.” Saying I was scared was an understatement. I was absolutely terrified. If I couldn’t break Quinn’s resolve and get him to be intimate with me, my future looked pretty bleak.
“A tad?” she said with a laugh and moved to stand in the doorway.
“This isn’t funny, Jess. There’s too much at stake, too much to lose. I…I just don’t think I can deal if something happens to him.” My voice cracked as I spoke.
“I know it’s not funny. I’m sorry. Listen, you and Quinn share something very few people ever find. Hold on to that, Ryann. Fight for it. More than anyone else I know, you deserve to be happy. I know you won’t give up.” She closed the door behind her, leaving me to my stupor.
I lay anxious in my bed, replaying my conversation with Jessica over and over in my mind. I knew she was right. I was rolling over, giving up, and the realization made me sick to my stomach.
I never gave up when things got tough. I always persevered, digging my heels in with a stubborn tenacity that sometimes bordered on irritating. When I wanted something, I usually got it. Why was I giving in so easily now? Why was I accepting defeat? Quinn was the best thing that had ever happened to me. He was my light, my joy, my heart and my soul. Was I just going to give him up without a fight?
“Hell, no,” I growled loudly and startled the nurse who’d just walked in to check my vitals.
“Sorry, honey. Got no choice, it’s my job.” She cast me a sideways glance, frowning as she went about her business.
By the time she left my room, I’d made up my mind. I wasn’t going down without a fight. I wasn’t going to lose Quinn.
Chapter 21
“THERE.” I TOSSED the blue Bic on top of the giant stack of release papers I’d just signed. “I feel like I signed my life away.”
The stout nurse gathered up my paperwork. She had warm honey-colored eyes and wore a bright pink scrub top with crazy geometric designs on it that made my eyes feel like crossing. “Yep. I get that every day. Now just sit tight while I go get your wheelchair.”
“Wheelchair? I can walk just fine, thank you. I broke my arm, not my leg.” What the hell was she thinking? I might have been a bit broken, but I was no invalid.
She pointed a pudgy finger in my direction and shook her head. “Honey, even if you were treated for an ingrown toenail, hospital policy states you must leave in a wheelchair. Now, like I said before, sit tight.” She waddled out of the room before I could protest further.
“Damn.” I looked over to Martha, who appeared equally taken aback.
“Someone’s not getting any,” she muttered under her breath.
Jessica strode into the room, twirling a set of car keys on her pointer finger. “Why do you look so pissy? What’d I miss?”
I didn’t feel like rehashing the wheelchair issue so I focused on the bigger issue at hand: rescuing Quinn.
She took a seat on the edge of my hospital bed and patted my leg with a smile. “My mom’s car is parked out front and ready to go.”
A deep ache wormed its way through my gut at the mention of the word “car.” My own vehicle, my precious Mint Mobile, had been found just outside the city limits the day before, mangled and crushed like a tin can. I might have been sporting a head injury, but the lightbulb was still on upstairs, and I understood the demon’s motivation. The Zmeu wanted me on foot, making it easier to attack me. But dammit, why couldn’t he have just disconnected the battery? Why’d he have to destroy my only means of transportation? I hated bumming rides off my friends. Stupid underworld rat bastard!
I turned to Martha, who stood and moved toward me. “I’ll help you with your clothes and hair.”
Due to my cast, my wardrobe choice was limited. I wore an oversized t-shirt and pair of sweats. My outfit was not exactly what one might refer to as sexy and definitely not conducive to seducing the man of my dreams. I cast her an appreciative smile. “Thank you.”
After Wheelchair Betty rolled me outside and saw that I was securely belted into the backseat of Jessica’s car, we took off toward Quinn’s place without delay. I’d been away from him long enough, and with his impending death hanging over our heads, there wasn’t a second to spare.
Martha turned in her seat as we sped away from the hospital. “First things first. Let’s do something about those ratty sweats you’re wearing.”
I heaved a giant sigh of relief. “Please. I’m all for comfort, but if I have to wear these damn things another minute, I think I’ll lose my mind.”
Jessica squealed from the front seat. “Wait! I have an idea.” She rifled through a magazine as she drove. Not the smartest thing to do, but hey, desperate times called for desperate measures. I was in the middle of a fashion emergency. “How about this?”
Martha leaned forward to look at her suggestion. “Hmm…I don’t know.” She turned her head and cast me a worried glance.
“Oh, come on,” Jessica cried. “It’s perfect. She needs to look sexy and this, right here, screams sex.”
Warning bells rang in my ears and my stomach rolled with unease. What the hell did she want to dress me in?
“Fine,” Martha said and focused on me intently.
The next thing I knew, my aging sweatpants and t-shirt were gone, replaced by a satiny red push up bra, and matching skirt, that sported ruffle upon ruffle of flowing red taffeta.
“What the hell!” I exclaimed. “What magazine were you looking at?”
Jessica held up a copy of Victoria’s Secret and shrugged as she focused on the road ahead of her.
“I. Don’t. Think. So! Zap me out of this please. Now.”
“Oh, for crying out loud. That outfit would have Quinn on his knees and begging,” Jessica grumbled from the front seat. “Whatever! Hand me the Cosmo.”
Martha tossed over a copy of the magazine, which Jessica ripped through while stopped at a light. “Here,” she said, chucking the magazine into the backseat. “Put her in this.”
I grabbed the dog-eared fashion magazine, making sure her selection was safe and appropriate before passing it over to Martha. The last thing I needed was to end up in some sort of black leather lingerie nightmare.
A few moments later, I sat dressed in a slinky blue top, which sported an open back, a pair of Seven jeans and some fancy black ball
et flats.
By the time Jessica dropped me off in front of Quinn’s estate, I was coiffed, fluffed and ready to put an end to his stubborn foolishness. There was no way in hell I’d let him go gently into the night. I’d fight for Quinn’s life until there wasn’t a breath left in my body.
There were only a few hours of sunlight left, so I rushed to the front doors, slamming my bandaged hand against the wood and ringing the doorbell.
“Quinn!” I shouted and continued to pound away at the giant doors. My efforts were met with a deafening silence. Where was Martha when I needed her? At least she could zap the doors open so I wouldn’t have to wait outside.
I zeroed in on the doorknob and thought “what the hell?” I grasped the knob and was surprised when it opened. I stepped into the foyer and called out again. “Quinn. Are you here?”
I heard a faint “Aye, I’m here” coming from the back of his large home, in the direction of the kitchen.
I raced toward the voice and came to a screeching halt as I entered the kitchen. Seated at one of the barstools along the large island with his head in his hands and a small folder in front of him was Quinn. He looked absolutely awful. Actually, awful didn’t come close to describing how bad he looked. In truth, Quinn looked positively wretched. He lifted his head as I entered the kitchen and cast me a warm smile that didn’t reach his eyes.
My stomach lurched.
“A ghrá.” He stood from his chair and walked forward to meet me. Quinn’s deep and powerful voice was tainted with sorrow and pain. Several days outgrowth covered his normally smooth face and head. Dark circles lined the undersides of his tired eyes, making it painfully obvious he hadn’t been sleeping. He wrapped his arms around me gently, avoiding my bulky cast.
I gasped at the myriad of sensations flooding my body and filling my senses. Raw heat and desire coursed through me at his touch, yet it was overshadowed by the all-encompassing aura of love flowing between us. This man was as essential to my well-being as breathing. We belonged together, I was certain of it.
“I missed you.” I lay my head against the large expanse of his chest, breathing in his heavenly, masculine scent and basking in the warmth of his embrace. It wasn’t until I was in his arms that I realized how incomplete I felt without Quinn. He was my other half, my home, and I knew that even if I had nothing else in this life, if I had him, I’d be complete.
“And I you, love.” He held me close and took a deep breath as he rested his cheek on the top of my head. His hands rubbed circles up and down my back, soothing me with the thing I’d craved for so long—his touch. Much to my dismay, he pulled back and walked over to the counter to retrieve a thin folder. “Here,” he said, handing it to me with a sigh. “Everything is in order.”
“What’s in order?” I looked down at the folder in confusion. “What is this?”
“The deed to this house…among other things.”
The house? Other things?
I reached my arm out, pointing to the thin, cream-colored folder he clutched in his hand, not wanting to touch the damn thing. “Is this what you’ve been working on the past two days?”
“Aye. I had to make sure you’d be taken care of when I’m no longer here.”
I was beyond confused, and to be honest, a little bit hurt he’d spent the last few days we had left together away from me. “You didn’t have to do that. I can take care of myself just fine.”
He blanched, as if I’d slapped him. “You didn’t think I’d leave ye with nothing, did you? I may be a womanizing bastard, but I’m not cruel. In the short time we’ve known each other, I’ve done nothing but bring you down, bring danger to your life. This…” he shook the folder through the air, “this is the one good thing I can do for you. The only thing I can do for you. Please, Ryann, don’t refuse it.”
He wore an agonized look of defeat on his handsome face. It was evident he believed himself to be the lowest of the low, a contemptible creature of no value. How wrong he was. Quinn was without a doubt the most selfless, thoughtful, caring person I’d ever known. Stubborn to a fault and fiercely passionate, he was my match in every way. We just fit.
I slapped the folder out of his hands. Paper scattered across the white tile flooring. “I don’t want your house. I want you.” My words were harsh and came barreling out before I could stop them. I knew his actions stemmed from concern for my well-being, but I couldn’t help the way I felt. I wanted to spend what little time I had on this earth with the people that I loved, Quinn topping that short list.
He stepped forward with his hand outstretched, trying to reason with me. “I’ve seen to it that you will be well taken care of for the rest of your days. You’ll never want for anything.”
“Yes, I will,” I cried out. “I’ll want for you.” How could he not see that? Why couldn’t he see that nothing else in this world mattered to me, but him?
He stiffened at my words before losing all control, punching a large hole in the nearby wall. A loud groan emanated from deep within his chest, and he stormed over to the nearby island. “Why? Why now? For five hundred years, I’ve walked this earth a lonely, miserable bastard, caring about nothing, caring about no one. Then, just as my worthless existence is finally about to end, you come waltzing into my life like a breath of fresh air, pulling me out from the dark cloud I’ve been endlessly trapped under.”
I stepped forward and raised my arm toward him. “Fate.” There was no other way to explain it. Quinn entered my life when I least expected it, showing me I was capable of laughing, hoping and most importantly, loving. Quinn was quite literally my angel, and I was not about to let him go.
His face twisted with rage. “Fuck fate!” He slammed his fists onto the marble counter, sending a large chunk crumbling to the floor. With anger pouring off him in waves and his muscles still flexing from the destruction he’d wrought upon the counter, Quinn looked deadly.
I should have been afraid, but I wasn’t. I’d never desired him more.
He came at me quickly, pinning me against the wall as he slammed his fists above my head. “The Fates hate me,” he said, his voice filled with agony. “Why else would they give you to me, only to take you away so soon? It would have been better if we’d never met.” He hung his head in defeat, resting it on my shoulder.
His pained words cut through me like a knife. “I should be screaming that, not you. I’m the one who’ll be left behind.” He wouldn’t have to live out his life knowing what once was. Knowing he’d found his soul mate, his one true love, the only person who could truly make him whole, yet couldn’t be with. If fate hated anyone, it hated me. It was taking away my beloved Quinn. I hated fate.
His eyes met mine, full of sadness and longing, and he cupped the side of my face, rubbing his thumb across my cheekbone. “I’m sorry, love.” He leaned forward, placing his forehead against mine as he spoke. “I don’t want to leave you. For the first time in my pathetic life, I have something to live for. You’ve touched a part of me, Ryann, that no one else has. I never imagined I’d care for another being as I care for you.” His voice was low and gravelly, full of pain. “You’ve brought meaning to my life and a happy end to my miserable existence.”
A painful ache took up residence in my chest and I fought to breathe. It felt like someone was tearing me in half. I gasped. “Quinn.”
He placed his hand on my mouth, silencing me. In a swift movement, he pulled a small object from his pocket and brought it to my hand, the light reflecting off the top of the silver metal.
It was a ring, an Irish claddagh. Placing the ring on my right hand, the heart facing inward, he spoke. “My heart belongs to you, a ghrá. Wear this always and remember me. Tá mo chróí istigh iónat. My heart is yours, eternally.”
He lifted my hand to his mouth, kissing the ring and my fingers tenderly before releasing my hand and pulling away. Quinn looked exactly the way I felt: as if someone ripped his still beating heart directly from his chest.
The pain in my heart was u
nbearable. I knew what Quinn was doing as he stepped back. He was saying goodbye, and I’d be damned if I was going to sit back and let him walk out of my life without a fight.
“Don’t you dare walk away from me!” Anger swept through me as I watched him turn his back to me. How could he just walk away? How could he turn away from me? I felt the same pain he did, yet I remained. “Coward!” I screamed.
He whirled around to face me, misery and resignation marring his face. “What would you have me do? Lie down and let you watch me die? I’m not a coward because I want to shield you from what’s to become of me. I love you too much to let you suffer such a thing.”
“If you loved me, you’d stay.”
“I do love you!” He stepped forward like a man on fire, eyes dark and full of a mixture of anger and desire.
My heart threatened to jump out of my chest, and my breaths came in quick, shallow pants.
“Then prove it, you stubborn bastard. Love me!”
He came at me like a lion attacking its prey, fierce and powerful, full of hunger and need. His mouth claimed my own, kissing me with a fevered passion that stole my breath away. In that moment, nothing else existed. There was only Quinn and me.
He growled as our tongues danced, exploring each other’s mouths with a ferocity that bordered on desperation. Having denied ourselves for so long, our need to claim each other was monumental.
My back still to the wall, and he lifted me off my feet with ease. One skilled hand squeezed my backside, while he ground himself into my center; his other hand fisted my hair as he deepened our kiss even further.
God, but he felt good! I felt like screaming from the rooftops. Finally! I moaned in delight at the feel of his mouth and hands on me.
“Is this what you want?” he growled in my ear. His lips blazed a trail of feather-light kisses down my neck, while he continued to thrust his rock hard cock against me, our traitorous clothes the only barrier between us and Quinn’s salvation.
