by Shay Hunter
I tried to hold my laughter. I had my friend Waxton bring his cousins by with hoodies to pump fear into Poe. I never wanted him to think I was safe. I wanted him to always assume that without him I could get hurt, mainly because he was in the save a woman business.
“I heard, Carlita told me. And I’m not gonna lie, I was scared.” I am lying.
“I don’t want you worrying about shit. I got five of my niggas on the door inside and five more outside. I’m not sure what the drama was about but you’re safe in here and you’re safe with me.” He exhaled. “Enough of that, the Baltimore promoter we used made sure every nigga worth a million is in the building. I wouldn’t be surprised if you cleared a hundred thou.”
I felt an electric current shoot through me just thinking about the possibilities. “Really? You think it’s gonna be that kind of night?”
“I’m positive, Mo. Everything is perfect. Truth be told all you gotta do is go get your money.”
I looked down and sighed. “Things are almost perfect,” I said standing up, walking toward the glittery coat rack.
“What’s wrong now?” He sat on the sofa and ran one hand down his face in frustration. “Why aren’t you happy?”
“Poe, can I ask you something and trust that you’ll tell me the truth?” I removed the velvet robe covering my body and placed it on the rack, revealing the silver costume underneath. I had it custom-made and it fit my body perfectly. “I want to know the truth even if you think it will hurt.”
“I’ll always be honest with you.” His eyes roamed from my feet to my breasts, before slowly crawling to my face.
“Are you gay?”
Before I knew it he was off the sofa and in my face, staring down at me, his hot breath spreading across my forehead. “What did you just say to me?”
“Are you gay?”
“What would make you think some shit like that?” He yelled.
“Because you don’t want me.”
He exhaled, turned around and ran his hand over his face again. “You are the most arrogant chick I’ve ever met in my life. Just because you got niggas eating out of your palm and I’m not one of them, you question my sexuality?”
“I just don’t understand what it is and it doesn’t have anything to do with other guys. Although I would understand why you didn’t want me if I was as big as Spy’s funky ass.”
He laughed sarcastically although I didn’t catch the joke.
“Poe, I’m serious. I can tell you think I’m attractive because even now you can’t keep your eyes off me. But what I don’t get is why you don’t give me a chance. What is the real reason you don’t want Mo?” I yelled slapping myself on my phat ass. Without even looking down I could feel it jiggle.
He looked at me and laughed. “I’ll answer part of the question, because we don’t have time for the rest. One of the reasons I don’t want you is because every time I think something is there, every time I feel myself wondering what it would be like to make you mine, you remind me of how vicious you can be. I own a strip club.” He nodded. “I understand that I will never be a prophet or someone respected but what I do have is heart. And I don’t go around trying to make people feel bad because I have power.”
“Poe, it’s not—”
He raised his hand. “Monique, we’re business partners.” His voice low and his words slow. “Nothing more and nothing less.” He walked toward the door. “Now hurry up. You on the clock.”
****
Hanging on the top of the pole I was in the middle of a money tornado. There were so many bills floating around me that I couldn’t see anybody, not even Poe.
I thought about what he said about me being vicious and although I didn’t agree with him, I understood where he was coming from. Part of the reason I loved Poe so much was that he was considerate. He was the sugar to my black coffee, no cream. So although I knew I couldn’t be extra soft like he wanted, I was an actress. And I knew how to apologize.
In my own way of course.
When the end of the Fetty Wap song went off I slid down, readying myself for the next part of my plan. Poe could resist me but he couldn’t resist his favorite song “How Can I Love U 2nite” by Sisqo. The moment the song came on I saw Poe turn around and look at the stage. He was talking to Julio and Curtis from Uptown but now he was staring at me.
When Sisqo’s voice pumped out he shook his head and gave me a sly look as I begin to move my body like a snake. He walked backwards and plopped down in a chair, as if already taken in by my spell.
And to think, I didn’t do anything yet.
With mini dance moves in between, I stepped off the stage and slowly made my way toward Poe. Every step was deliberate and calculating and I realized it could all go wrong. He wasn’t one for public displays of affection but I was taking a chance.
When I was standing in front of him I winked and wiggled softly and slowly, careful to keep my distance. He shook his head again and said, “You something else you know that?”
I had him.
I turned around and slowly sat on his lap just as Sisqo sung, ‘Don’t cum, baby please wait for me, just think how wet we’re gonna be.’ I smiled at the customers who now circled the chair and tossed more bills in the air. There wasn’t a space on the floor visible. I moved and grinded until I felt his stiffness against the seat of my ass.
Now I really got him.
When the song was over I turned around and looked at him, still sitting on his lap, the heat from my pussy against his dick. “You tired of playing games as much as I am?”
“Mo, not here.”
I placed my index finger on his lips. I lowered my head and whispered in his ear. “No more games, Poe. I’m yours and you’re mine. Now come get this pussy.”
He lifted me up and my legs wrapped around his waist. Arms on his shoulders while he gripped my ass, he looked into my eyes. “I hope I’m not making a mistake.”
“How can you make a mistake when love is involved?” He walked me to my dressing room.
The moment the door opened and closed he stuck his tongue into my mouth, snatched off my outfit and sat me on the edge of the vanity. Within seconds I felt his hard dick stabbing inside of me. “This what you wanted, bitch?” He said as he banged into me like a wild animal.
“Ye…ye…yes,” I stuttered, my body jerking up and down.
“You wanted this dick and you gonna get it now.” He fucked me so hard it was borderline painful. “Still think I’m gay, bitch? I should’ve smacked the shit out of your ass for disrespecting me.”
I couldn’t speak, every inch of my body tingled and since I waited so long for this moment I was about to cum. When I felt his penis throbbing I knew he was about to let go to and within seconds he came.
I really got him now and mama would be so proud.
CHAPTER TEN
SPYRELLA
ONE MONTH LATER
I took the last wing from the hot grease and placed it on the paper towel. When I looked out of the window over the stove I noticed snow was falling heavily, I almost couldn’t see across the street to the next house. The weather was supposed to be bad and I was trying to prepare everything for my company so that tonight would be perfect.
When there was a knock at the door I wiped my hand on my strawberry apron and walked toward it. He’s early but I wasn’t concerned because the food wouldn’t take much longer. When I looked out the peephole I was surprised to see my mother. Smiling I let her in. “Ma?” She still looked like she was living on the streets. “What are you doing here?”
She looked me up and down as snow fell on the top of her head, making her old braids brown and white. “Spyrella, you lost…you lost so much weight.” She smiled. “I mean how did you do it?”
I glanced down at myself, temporarily forgetting that I was smaller than the last time she saw me. “Yeah…I’ve been working at it. Have a long way to go though.”
She laughed. “Working at it? You have to be at least fifty pounds lighter.”
I cleared my throat. “Just watching what I eat and stuff like that.” I stepped back and opened the door wider. “Come inside, ma. You’ll catch a cold out there.”
She dusted the fresh snow off of her head and clothes and walked in, her jaw dropping as she looked around. I’m sure she’s shocked at how beautiful my house is. It’s not like she’s been here but even I was amazed at how much love I placed into the house. After all the plan was to stay here for some months, eat as much as I want and then take my life. Honestly I’m not one hundred percent sure that plan is not off the board. But when I first got here I didn’t see any way out of my grief.
Things are slightly different now.
“Did this house come like this?” She asked, glancing around.
“Not really. It was pretty bare. I installed the recess lighting, painted the living room yam, my bathroom soft blue and my bedroom eggshell color.”
She looked over at me. “The same colors in our old house.” She swallowed. “The one I burned down.”
I nodded. I hadn’t realized I’d done that.
“Well it really is beautiful and comfortable.” She tossed her black backpack on the floor. She removed her gloves and coat and tossed them on the floor. My mother had a tendency to be nasty, even when I was a kid so I guess not a lot had changed.
“I’m still working on some things but for now it’ll do.” I picked her coat and gloves up and put them on the chair. “What are you doing here, ma?”
She sighed. “I’ve decided to take you up on your offer. And move in with you.” She paused. “That is if you still need me.”
“It’s been a little over a month, some things have changed.”
She nodded. “What was so important anyway?”
I was going to kill myself.
“Nothing you needed to worry about.” I waved her off. “Was having an identity crisis that’s all.” I exhaled. “But I am happy that you’re here, ma and you’re welcome to stay as long as you like. I have plenty of room.”
She hugged me and I inhaled for a moment the elements of the street that was all over her clothing and skin. “Ma, how about you go take a shower and put on some clean clothes. Afterwards I’ll make you a plate.”
“Am I intruding?” she paused and gazed at the candles I set up around the living room. “Looks like you’re waiting for someone else.”
“It’ll be fine, ma. I want you here, so please don’t worry about it.” I smiled again. “Come with me.” I walked her to the guest bathroom and handed her some sweat pants and a white t-shirt from my room. “The soap is under the sink and a washcloth and towel are in the cabinet over the—” The doorbell rang and interrupted my thought.
“Your company is here,” She smiled, her teeth as yellow as lemons. “I’ll be fine.”
“Okay, let me know if you need anything.”
I rushed toward the front door, leaving my mother where she was. I didn’t mean to go so abruptly but I was expecting company. When I opened the door Reggie was on the other side holding a bouquet of red roses speckled with snow. He was wearing blue jeans and I could smell the leather from his black jacket. “You’re beautiful.” He kissed me on the cheek and I pulled his cold hand inside.
After kissing I placed the flowers in a vase and walked him to the dining room where I prepared his plate. We had been dating for a month and I loved the time and attention he showed me. These days I was not alone.
But there was one problem.
Reggie didn’t like my weight loss goals. He wanted me fat but I was uncomfortable. I had always been a thin girl trapped in a fat girl’s body and although I tried to convince him that the only reason I gave him a chance was because I loved the new body I was building, he didn’t seem happy. In the end he told me he would support my change but I got the impression it wasn’t the case.
“My mom’s here,” I said under my breath.
His eyes widened. “That’s good, baby. You said you’d been looking for her.” He paused. “So how come you don’t look happy?”
“I am…it’s just that…I guess I wasn’t expecting her.”
“So how long will she be here?”
“I think she’s gonna be here for a while.” I ate my biscuit and downed it with some water. “You don’t mind do you?”
He looked shocked. “Spy, I would never come between you and your mother. I’m looking forward to meeting her.”
“Really?” I asked with wide eyes.
“If she’s a part of you I want the best for you.”
I got up, downed the rest of the water in my glass and kissed him on the cheek. “That’s why I love you.” He smacked me in the ass. “I’m going to the bathroom. My mom’s in the guest one so I have to go to my room.”
“Cool, I’ll open the wine.”
“Okay.” I rushed upstairs. When I was in my bathroom I closed the door and grabbed my red toothbrush. On my knees in front of the toilet I stuck the bottom of the toothbrush down my throat and vomited as quietly as possible. I had been doing it so long it was easy.
I almost finished purging when the door flung open and Reggie was standing in the doorway holding two glasses of wine. “Baby, I poured you a—” When he saw me on the floor he placed both glasses on the sink and walked deeper inside. His face was pulled into a frown and he looked like he wanted to hurt me. “Yo, what the fuck you doing?”
I stood up, flushed the toilet and wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. Trying to think of a good lie I moved to the sink. “I wasn’t feeling well.” I turned the water on, rinsed my toothbrush and brushed my teeth.
“You doing it again aren’t you?” He crossed his arms over his chest. “You promised me you wasn’t but you still are.”
“Reggie, I told you I don’t feel well.”
“STOP FUCKING LYING TO ME!”
I jumped at the sound of his voice. “Reggie, I know how it looks, but I promise I’m done with that.” I rinsed my mouth and turned the water off.
“Let me be clear, I will not deal with a woman who abuses her body. Ever!”
“And being fat is not an abuse?”
“I’m serious!” he pointed in my face. “You said you wanted to lose weight and I got behind that because I’m trying to get to know you even though I like my women big. But if I find out you throwing up to be a size I’m not even feeling, I won’t fuck with you anymore! I hope you prepared to deal with that.” When he turned around my mother was standing there. He wiped his hand down his face and said, “Uh…hey…it’s nice to meet you.” He walked around her and stomped down the stairs.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CARLITA
“She doesn’t want that kind of hair, she says it has to be without the cuticles attached.”
I was frustrated with the attendant at the beauty supply store because I had Monique on the cell phone screaming in my ear and Wisdom at my side. Earlier I convinced him that our planned trip to the grocery store wouldn’t be sidetracked too long with a stop for Mo.
That was two hours ago and we haven’t been to the food store yet.
“I’m telling you brand you seek doesn’t come with cuticles attached.” The Asian woman seemed at her wits end with me. “If it did I would sell! I’m in business of money. You sure friend has right brand?”
“Tell that bitch I’ve been coming there for two years and I know what hair I used. It’s May Black Brazilian hair with the cuticles.”
I sighed and looked over at Wisdom. “I’ll be in the car,” he said before storming off.
Now we gonna be fighting all day behind this shit.
“They don’t have it, Monique.” I rolled my eyes. “Did you want anything else? I had some place else to be.”
“You know what, just bring the May Black brand with cuticles. I’ll look for it myself later. Of course thanks to you I got to pay Waxton $300.00 for a weave job with some fucked up hair!”
I didn’t feel like arguing. My man was in the car mad about it all and she already ruin
ed my day. I looked at the attendant. “She said give me the May Black.” The attendant rolled her eyes and packaged the order. I handed her money and grabbed my change. “Got the hair, I’ll see you later, Monique.”
“Come to Skeezers, I’m having my hair done here to be ready for my set tonight.”
I frowned. “But you said bring it to the house! I got Wisdom with me and he gonna be madder if we gotta go out the way to the club.”
“But I ain’t there! Plus the more time you spend on the phone…”
I can’t with this bitch!
“Okay, Mo.” I hung up on her and walked toward my car. After everything I went through just now it irritated me more that she didn’t even say thank you. I’m not her fucking maid! I’m her cousin and I’m tired of being used.
Once I got in the car I tossed the hair in the back and got behind the steering wheel. “You want to buy something to eat?”
“No,” Wisdom said as he strolled through his cell phone. He didn’t bother to look up at me.
“I thought we were going out?” I pulled the car into traffic.
“We were supposed to cook remember? This trip was only supposed to take five minutes remember?” he laughed sarcastically. “For real, all I want to do is go home. I’ll find us something to eat at the house. I bought some steaks last week, figured I’ll throw some potatoes in the oven and get some asparagus.”
I smiled because if he thought this much about dinner it meant he wasn’t that mad. “Okay, I have to drop the hair off at Skeezers and then we can—”
“I’ve gone through the process already to buy the house.” He stuffed his cell into his pocket. “I got it and I’m moving in a week. It’s what I wanted to talk to you about.”
I felt like I was about to shit on myself and pulled the car to the side of the road. I moved my body to look into his eyes. “Wisdom, I thought we were…doing it together?”
“I’m not waiting no more, Carlita. I can’t sit by while you let this chick run your life. Either you’re with me or you’re not. Looks like you already chose. I just hope you made the right decision.”
