by M. L. Ryan
“Until today when Hailey used magic on you. How convenient,” Sebastian countered.
Ulut let out a heavy sigh. “If I could have done it myself, I would have and, believe me, I tried every day to let you know I wasn’t just some stray.”
I wracked my brain, but I couldn’t recall anything that—even in hindsight—might be interpreted as a cry for help. “Like what?” I demanded. “When Alex and Sebastian were convinced you weren’t what you seemed, you still only acted like a dog.” This time, no one glared at me for breaking my vow of silence. I guessed it was okay to ask questions if they were of an oppositional nature.
“You think it’s easy without the ability to speak to communicate?” Ulut huffed. “When you first found me, I tried to tap out words on your laptop. Not possible with big paws. And all those scratches on the doorframes and floors weren’t just me keeping my nails manicured. That was a code. A rather primitive one, but that’s all I could manage without opposable thumbs.”
I probably did see some random stuff typed across my computer screen, but I was so used to Vinnie trotting across the keyboard and leaving long strings of letters it wouldn’t have registered as anything out of the ordinary. As for the cipher-scratches, there was a certain non-randomness to them now that I knew they weren’t just anxiety-driven pet damage.
Sebastian opted to match Ulut’s snippiness. “How were we supposed to know you were trying to signal us with the canine version of Morse Code? If you wanted to call attention to it, you should have pointed to them. Your big paws could have handled that, I’m sure.”
I had to disguise my smile using a hand covering a fake cough. Regardless of my reaction to Sebastian’s unintended pun, he did have a valid point. Ulut didn’t really do anything that might clue us into his real identity or his entrapment.
With a frustrated sigh, Ulut replied, “At first, I wasn’t certain I could trust any of you. I only went back to Arizona because you were hunting Keem. Once I figured out you weren’t human and had ample magic, I hoped you’d try to help me get unstuck, but I had to discern your character. I knew Hailey wasn’t a problem, but you and Alex,” he said, gesturing towards them, “were another story. You are trained to be cautious.”
Sebastian leaned in and growled, “As it turns out, we were right to be suspicious of you.”
“I’m not a spy, and I pose no danger to anyone except Keem. I want him caught as much as you,” Ulut protested, banging his fist on the table.
The guards stepped forward in response to the outburst, but Alex waved them back. They complied, but seemed palpably more vigilant. Their ramped-up tension made me uneasy, and even though none of it was directed at me, I instinctively slid a couple of extra feet away.
The few seconds required to settle the guards gave Ulut a chance to calm down as well. In a more controlled tone, he continued his explanation.
“Look, this is my first time out of my own dimension. Before this, I wasn’t sure there were other dimensions. Where I’m from, those that have magic tend to be lawless thugs that use their power to harm or take what’s not theirs. I had no way of knowing you and Alex weren’t like that, and I wasn’t going to take a chance until I knew for sure. When it became obvious you were the good guys, I tried to let you know what I was, but I couldn’t. I thought if I could get into Courso, I might be able to shift. I had no idea a dog shouldn’t be able to travel through your portal. If I had, I probably would have tried harder to reveal myself in Tucson, so you wouldn’t have assumed I was a threat.”
Ulut glanced briefly at me before he squared his shoulders. “Keem was despicable enough when he was just a two-bit punk, but when I saw what he was doing to those humans—butchering them for no reason other than his own amusement—I knew he must be stopped. I wanted your help to get back to my real self. And now I want to help you defeat Keem. I know him, and I know his weaknesses. I am telling the truth.”
A dubious grin flickered across Sebastian’s lips. “Let’s just see about that, shall we?”
20
While Ulut appeared unfazed by Sebastian’s taunting tone, I wasn’t nearly as unconcerned. After all, Alex and Sebastian had implied they might do things I wouldn’t approve of, and so far, the questioning seemed fairly tame. Was this the point in the interrogation process where the hardcore tactics were trotted out? Ulut didn’t strike me as the type to be swayed by pain, which was good because the thought of the still-mysterious tongue-shredder made me slightly nervous. Maybe they’d use sleep deprivation or force Ulut to listen to Kenny G CDs repeatedly for hours on end until he broke down and told the truth.
It didn’t take long for the answer: two loud knocks sounded, and one of the guards peeked out of the small window cut into the thick door. After a brief conversation, the guard nodded and turned the lock. Two hooded figures, covered entirely in black robes, entered. Between the voluminous fabric and their slightly bent posture, I couldn’t see their faces, but silently, they positioned themselves on either side of Ulut. With a nod from Alex, they turned to face each other, lifting their arms over Ulut’s head until their fingers barely touched.
“His purpose is honorable,” they announce simultaneously as they lifted their heads to reveal two grim-faced Styrixchnia. “There is no evil intent.”
I let out the breath I hadn’t realized I was holding and mentally berated myself for not recognizing the uniform of the summer residence’s living lie detectors. Sebastian noticed my relief and shook his head.
“Really, my dear, do you have so little faith in Alexander’s and my characters that you worried we had sent for the local sadists to draw out a confession? Be honest, you were thinking about the tongue shredder, weren’t you?” he teased, wagging a finger at me for emphasis.
I hated when he knew exactly what was going through my mind. During our bodily cohabitation, he could deduce my thoughts based on my emotional state. Now, even without that physical connection, he still seemed to do it too often to be a mere coincidence. He probably just knew me inside and out, having been both places for extended periods of time. Whatever the explanation, it pissed me off in a big way.
“May you be trapped for eternity in a small, windowless room with only a dysenteric elephant for company,” I sassed. It wasn’t the greatest hex, but it had been a long day.
Sebastian raised one imperious eyebrow. “What interesting imagery. At least you didn’t resort to puerile expletives—a real improvement.”
Before I could rattle off a few of those choice juvenile invectives, the Styrixchnia scurried toward me. “No evil intent here, either,” they proclaimed as their hands hovered over my now-fuming head.
“Shows what you know,” I muttered under my breath. The hooded mood-rings stepped back and instead of the usual spinster-schoolmarm-with-unrelenting-hemorrhoids expression, they both had identical smirks. One may have actually giggled a little. Wow, who knew they had senses of humor? Hell, I assumed they were physically incapable of forming a smile.
Apparently, I wasn’t the only one who questioned the functioning of the Styrixchnia facial muscles. As they left, Alex followed their retreat wide-eyed.
“In over a hundred years, this is only the second time I’ve seen them amused.”
“What tickled them before this?” I asked.
“They prevented Sebastian from accessing the palace, declaring him to be ‘wrought with rancor and trickery’. It took him hours to gain entry.”
“They thought that was funny?”
Sebastian huffed out a response. “Well, I suppose if you only play one practical joke every century or so, it doesn’t take much.”
We turned our attention back to Ulut, who had remained silent during our discussion of Styrixchnia taste in humor. Alex stood and flicked his hand. The inconspicuous motion must have released some invisible tether that had connected Ulut to his chair because almost immediately, Ulut rose and stretched his long arms over his head.
“Hey, why didn’t you use the Styrixchnia when Rufus, I
mean Ulut, first got here? I asked. “We could have saved a lot of time.”
“Only works on people,” Sebastian replied.
“And luggage,” I added under my breath.
Alex ignored my pique and glanced at the former non-person in question. “Well, it appears you have been truthful, at least in terms of not meaning any harm.” Alex’s tone was even, but he didn’t seem ready to slap Ulut on the back and ask him if he wanted to grab a beer.
“I have told the truth in all things,” Ulut countered. “I will do my best to prove that to you all.”
Alex pressed his lips into a fine line. “Time will tell,” he said quietly. “We will find you suitable lodging, and you are free to move about the palace. However, under the circumstances, it shouldn’t be a surprise that you will be accompanied wherever you go.”
“I understand your need for caution and would do the same if the tables were turned,” Ulut glanced at me and continued. “In times such as these, one cannot be too careful.”
“Indeed,” Alex agreed, stepping behind me to wrap his arm around my waist.
Tone it down, boys, I thought as I mentally rolled my eyes. If the testosterone level in here gets any higher, I’m going to be forced to do something drastic, like forcing you to engage in a discussion about the differences between BB and CC creams. Instead, I opted for a less nuclear option.
“I’m sure Ulut would like to change into something a little less ancient-Rome-goes-to-Bed-Bath-and-Beyond, so let’s get him settled. Besides, if transforming for him is anything like it is for me, he probably needs to rest and eat as well.”
Ulut smiled and said wearily, “Yes, thank you. I could use some real food. It’s been a long time.”
I hadn’t even considered that aspect of Ulut being non-human for an extended period. The longest I’d been in hawk form was a few hours, and I’d had Rufus for weeks. “How long were you stuck as a dog?”
“Six months, two weeks, and four days.”
“Are you shitting me?” I blurted. I figured a month or so, tops. But six and a half months? “Oh my God, Ulut, you must have wondered if you’d ever be you again. I’m surprised you’re capable of standing up right now.”
“I believe my ability to transform is a bit different than yours, Hailey. From observing your bends, I could tell it required more energy output than mine. I’m tired and hungry right now, but not nearly as debilitated as you might be.”
Sebastian exchanged a few words with the guards outside the door, and then informed Ulut he should go with them. “They will take you to your quarters and see that you are settled,” he added as Ulut started down the hallway. Ulut nodded and, flanked by two of the guards, disappeared around the corner.
I plunked down into the chair Alex had used and tried to put everything into perspective. “Wow,” was all I could come up with to sum up the day’s events.
“Wow, indeed,” Sebastian answered, crossing his arms. “I know the conclusions of the Styrixchnia are beyond reproach, but Ulut’s story seems so…”
“Far-fetched?” Alex interrupted.
We all nodded. It was a fantastic tale, but given my newfound ability to become feathered, I supposed it wasn’t really all that unbelievable. Deep down, I felt Ulut was trustworthy. “You know,” I reminded Alex yet again, “if he’d wanted to harm any of us, he had ample opportunity.”
“True, but I still have many questions. Many,” he emphasized after a short pause.
“Who doesn’t?” I conceded. “But I suspect yours are more focused on the global ramifications while mine are more along the lines of the little details.”
Sebastian smirked as he moved toward the door. “What is it you humans like to say, the devil is in the details? I think I will make certain the security staff is clear as to their responsibilities regarding ours.”
“He’s no devil,” I called out to Sebastian’s backside as he made his exit. I shifted my attention to Alex, who was now leaning on the edge of the table. “He really isn’t.”
“Whatever he is, or misgivings I might have, we may have no choice but to let him help. The deadline is fast approaching, and we are no closer to a solution.” Alex stared into the now-empty hallway. “A wise man gets more use from his enemies than a fool from his friends.”
“Did you just make that up?”
“Oh no,” Alex answered. “It’s from some human philosopher from the seventeenth century, I forget his name. Baltasar something, I think.
“That sounds very existential. I had no idea you were into that kind of thing.”
He smiled. “I’m not. I read it on the back of a box of granola at your place.”
I bought breakfast cereal that promotes highbrow claptrap? I really have to stop shopping at Whole Foods, I vowed to myself.
“Not to change the subject,” Alex continued, “but what exactly were you doing to force Ulut to transform?”
Sliding down in the chair, I reluctantly confessed the magical feat I had attempted. When there was no immediate response, I peered up through my lowered lashes to see a look of abject horror on Alex’s face.
“You were trying to use TA on a dog?” he finally sputtered.
I raised my palms in denial. “Oh, no. No, no, no! You think I was… because that’s just…” I wrinkled my nose in disgust. “Eew. I was practicing by magically poking Rufus. You know, boning up on my technique so I wouldn’t break anything.”
Alex raised his eyebrows. “Boning up on your technique, eh?”
“Believe me, there was nothing sexual involved. I was trying to scratch his ear and somehow I lost control or something.”
He was grinning as he took my hand and pulled me upright. “I figured you were trying levitation; that’s something beginners often attempt. Oh wait,” he added, “I guess in your own way, you were trying to get a rise out of him.”
“Stop it,” I objected. Unfortunately, I could see the silliness of both the situation that resulted in Rufus becoming Ulut, and the current conversation, and my protestations were punctuated by my own cackling. It wasn’t really all that funny, but there had been a lot of tension during the whole dog-to-human debacle, and I was probably just letting off some of that pent-up anxiety. I laughed so hard, I started to cough and had to make an concerted effort to breathe slowly to get my lungs to stop spasming. “Whatever you do,” I wheezed, “please don’t tell Sebastian. I’m embarrassed enough as it is.”
“You keep worrying about his reaction, but as I said before, Sebastian will be overjoyed at your initiative.”
“Whatever, let’s just keep this our little secret.”
“What will you give me to keep my mouth shut?” he drawled, wagging his eyebrows suggestively.
I wrapped my arms around his waist. “Nothing, Blondie. You’re no good to me without your mouth open.”
Alex leaned down and kissed me, hard. As his tongue darted between my lips, he whispered, “Is this what you had in mind?”
“Sort of,” I moaned. “I was thinking of something a bit lower.” He began to move his head down my neck when, behind me, someone cleared their throat.
“Sorry to interrupt you two, but you will have time for this when Keem is apprehended.”
“Really, Sebastian? Would it have killed you to wait another ten minutes?” I complained without turning around. I didn’t know why I was surprised by the intrusion. After all, Alex and I shared one night of uninterrupted connubial bliss, why would I think we’d be granted another so soon?
“If you wanted privacy, you shouldn’t have picked such a public spot to get frisky. And you,” he directed toward Alex, “good god, man. We have work to do.”
You know things are bleak when Mr. I’ve-Slept-With-Thousands-Of-Women-and-Never-Once-Woken-Up-With-One chides you for attempting a quickie in between hunting for a ruthless and powerful nutcase. When I spun around to face Sebastian, however, his eyes twinkled with mischief.
He cocked his head to one side. “Don’t look so put out, my dear. If I
’m not getting any, I have no compunction about making it more difficult for those around me to satisfy their needs.”
“Why am I not surprised that you would take out your frustration on everyone else? Can’t you find some wide-eyed, impressionable chambermaid to seduce? Or have all the females here already experienced your charms and want nothing more to do with you?”
Sebastian moved closer and patted my shoulder. “Trust me, if I put my mind to it, I would have no trouble interesting as many women as I could handle. Which, by the way, is a very large number indeed. But you know I have vowed to remain chaste until I have made Rachel my own.”
I couldn’t bring myself to mention I planned to do everything humanly possible to remove the main barrier to his goal by convincing my best friend to dump Cortez. I hadn’t quite convinced myself that Sebastard would be an improvement.
“When you say ‘chaste,’ do you mean it like a normal person would define it, or is there some special Kessian interpretation?”
“Well, if a normal person’s definition is ‘no sex at all,’ then that’s exactly what I mean.”
“None? No blow jobs, no dinner at the Y, no dry-humping?”
Alex piped in before Sebastian could answer. “Dinner at the Y? I don’t think I’ve ever heard it put that way before.”
“Nor I,” Sebastian admitted. “Not a very clever vulgarism, really. Hailey, you should endeavor to use more amusing sexual colloquialisms. For example…”
I had no desire to hear Sebastian’s preferred vernacular, so I stopped him before whatever he was going to say scarred me forever. “You are just trying to avoid answering my original question.”
“Not at all. I assure you there has been neither inter- nor outer-course. When Rachel is finally mine, it will make the experience all the more special because of my abstinence.”
“Okay, fine, you’re as celibate as a monk. Applause, applause. But here’s a tip: lose the ‘when she is mine’ crap. Rachel isn’t a fan of that kind of bullshit.”
