by Nancy Toback
Turning, his face reflected mild surprise. Her last-ditch attempt seemed to make no impact on him. “Really? I didn’t think you would.” His voice was flat. Her jittery stomach told her the evening couldn’t end soon enough for him.
Jess sat up straighter, determined to get it right this time. “I’m sorry I didn’t return your phone calls. I needed time to think.”
Tom shrugged. “Understandable, Jess. No big deal.”
Yes, it’s a very big deal. She wanted to punch the walls. They needn’t be formal with one another. But here they were, acting like strangers. “I overreacted to the Love Online incident. I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry, too.” Tom ran his gaze over her quickly. “Let’s forget it.”
He was leaving. Jess squeezed her hands together on the tabletop. The solid walls around him blocked her from asking him to stay. Corinne and Brenda and all her friends were wrong. Yes, even her father.
“You look beautiful, Jess.”
A spark of hope sent warmth through her. “Thanks. You’re looking quite good yourself.” From the corner of her eye, she caught sight of Frank heading toward their table. Jess sighed. Oh, please, not now.
“Hey, hey, I finally made it.” Frank’s voice immediately severed the delicate threads holding whatever remained of them together.
Tom’s smile vanished. He flicked a glance at Frank, then back at her.
Jess shook her head, trying to answer the questions and erase the hurt she read in Tom’s eyes. She shot Frank a look. “So where are you sitting?”
Frank jerked his thumb in the direction behind them. “I was sitting over there. Made a deal with a lady who was supposed to be sitting here, and”—Frank dropped into the vacant seat beside hers—“we switched.” He laughed.
Tom shook his head.
Caught in the thick maze of tension between the two, Jess prayed the floor would open up and swallow her whole. She turned her head, focusing on Tom. “Are you leaving tomorrow?”
“Hey, Buddy.” Frank leaned past her. “Tomorrow? I didn’t know that.”
Tom’s mouth lifted in a cynical grin.
Holding the back of Tom’s chair with her right hand, she pressed her fingers into the wood. I love you, Tom. This is a misunderstanding.
“Yeah, I’ll be out of here before you know it,” Tom said, staring down at the table.
“Too bad.” Frank rested his hand on her wrist. Jess hesitated to pull away for fear of rousing Tom’s attention.
Tom turned his head, dropped his gaze to the table, and nodded slowly. Too late.
He lifted his gaze to Frank. “Why do you ask? Are you going to miss me or something?” The bridled anger in his tone made her pulse kick up.
Jess dragged her foot under the table, searching for Frank’s leg to give him a swift kick. Frank had to be daft not to sense the boiling undercurrent. Jess forced a laugh. “Didn’t the bride look gorgeous?”
Neither of the men budged. Frank smiled. “Well, what do you think?”
In one quick motion, Jess slipped her hand out from under Frank’s. “This place is lovely. I hear the food—”
“What do I think? I think you should be happy.” Tom leaned past her, closer to Frank, as if her chair were vacant. “You’ll get my office, and you’ll get—”
“Oh, come on, you guys.” Jess swallowed past the rising panic in her throat. “You know you’ll both miss each other.”
“Excuse me.” Tom pushed back from the table and stood. “I’d better get some air.”
Jess watched him stride away, her heart sinking with his every step. She spun in her chair toward Frank, her jaw clenched. She took deep breaths until she thought she could speak without later regretting what she said. “You know, it’s not right—you—practically coming onto me when Tom’s here.”
Frank rested his cheek against his fist. “I’m sorry, Jess, but I have only the most honorable intentions.”
“Is that right? You may not know it, but I’m sure Tom interprets your honorable intentions as outright flirting.”
Frank leaned back in his chair, shaking his head. “Tom’s never said as much to me.”
Jess felt her spine stiffen. “Maybe Tom’s too much of a gentleman to say anything.” She stopped for another breath, which did nothing to calm her. “But I know Tom. I know that even if Tom’s hurting, he’s too deep to push himself on others or try to control them.”
“Yeah, that’s what I think too.” Frank grinned.
Jess glared at him. “Y–you don’t act like it. It appears as if you’re intentionally trying to hurt him.” She dropped her gaze to the table, her throat and eyes burning. “I’m not suggesting you like me as anything more than a friend, Frank, but honestly—”
“Oh, but I do. I love you, and I love Tom, like a sister and brother.”
Jess’s gaze snapped to his. Why blame Frank? It was all her fault—playing hide-and-seek with her emotions when Tom asked her forgiveness. Ignoring him when she should’ve forgiven him on the spot, wrapped in his strong arms. “Then you’ll have to forgive my outburst. I think I—”
“Should go after Tom.” Frank jutted his chin. “He’s on the terrace, you know.”
Jess frowned, pushed back from the table, and stood. “I don’t know what makes you tick, Frank, but I—”
“Oh, Jess, I was only trying to light a fire under Tom.” Frank groaned. “If I went about it the wrong way, please forgive me. But I know how much Tom loves you.” He smiled. “And I know how much you love him.”
Her jaw hung ajar for a moment. “I think I have to go to Tom.” Jess pivoted and headed for the double doors, her heart drumming in her ears.
Nineteen
Jess twisted the shiny brass knob on the glass-paned door. She stepped outside onto the wooden planks and closed the door behind her gently. Clamping her hands behind her back, she observed Tom from a distance.
He stood facing the ocean, arms resting on the terrace guardrail. His profile, dark against the moonlight, made her senses tingle with excitement. A light breeze combed his thick brown hair. She was not afraid to say, “I love you.”
She neared him on tiptoes, though he probably couldn’t hear her approaching over the sound of roaring waves crashing along the shoreline.
Jess stopped several feet behind him. Her lips curved in a smile. Had she loved him from the moment their eyes met—as Tom said he loved her? Now she couldn’t recall a day she hadn’t been in love with him. His powerful presence had always drawn her. She had always preferred him above all others.
Drawing a deep breath of the salty night air, she felt as fearless as Frank—who’d nearly laid down his life to see them together. If Tom still chose to leave, one truth would remain.
The Lord, knowing their hearts, had orchestrated each event until they’d both arrived at this moment in time. He held their future in His capable hands.
“Hi, Jess,” Tom said, without turning to her.
“Did you hear me?” Jess moved to the railing and stood alongside him.
“No.” Tom turned his head. His dark gaze, as gentle as a caress, captured hers. “But nobody smells as nice as you do.”
Gazing into his eyes, the anger she saw at the table was gone. Her heart ached as she drank in the comfort of his nearness. Would he really go away tomorrow? “And nobody’s ever given me better counsel than you.” She smiled.
“Hmm. What does that mean?” Tom’s brows pulled to-gether. And she even loved his frown.
“Aha.” Staring out at the Atlantic, reflecting the big silvery moon and pounding the jetties, she was hit again by the enormous power of God. The Lord could do anything—change hearts and minds in an instant. “You’ve forgotten our outburst in Bible class, haven’t you?” Jess gave him a sidelong glance.
Tom ran his gaze over her face slowly. “It’s possible. But I doubt I’ve forgotten much of anything we’ve done together.”
His ready confession made her heart skip beats. Jess turned, facing him fully. “Proverbs 27:9—do
you remember? Mr. Baylor’s class?” She couldn’t restrain a grin.
“Oh, yes, now it’s all coming back.” Tom clucked his tongue. “Didn’t that verse cost me dearly?”
“I’ll say.” Jess laughed. Tom ran his fingers over her cheek, tucking a wayward strand of hair behind her ear. “Y–you paid by scrubbing the schoolhouse floors on a Saturday—when you needed to practice for a big game.”
Jess watched a familiar smile curve his tempting mouth. Her heart overflowed with love for him. Tom had loved her from the day they’d met. He’d done so in his quiet way, never asking anything in return.
Yet he had only said “I love you” to her face as her friend. His E-mail counted for something. But now she longed for more.
Tom tipped his head. “I know that verse. ‘Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart.’ ” He nodded slowly. “And you always made my heart rejoice, Jess.”
“Did I?” She held her breath. Dare she let herself believe he’d utter them now? But he glanced out at the wild sea, his jaw set.
Jess straightened her shoulders. “ ‘So doth the sweetness of a man’s friend by hearty counsel,’ the proverb goes on to say.” She reached out hesitantly and took hold of his strong hands. “You’ve been a sweet friend, Tom, and you’ve given me hearty counsel.”
Tom raised her left hand to his lips and pressed a kiss to her palm. “Jess, I—” His chest rose and fell with a deep breath. He brushed his thumb over the ring on her finger. “It’s beautiful.”
“Thanks.” She slipped her hands from his grasp and held fast to the railing. They both faced the ocean now, together, but alone. “Is that what you really wanted to say about the ring, Tom?”
“No.” He cleared his throat. “I wanted to ask where you got it. Who gave it to you. And why that ex-friend of mine is slobbering all over you, when I’ll be out of his way by tomorrow.” There was a hard edge to his voice. “That’s what I wanted to say.”
Jess tilted her chin. “You wrote in your E-mail that you’ve changed, Tom. You said you’d speak your mind from now on, regardless of how you thought the other person would respond.”
“I know what I wrote, Jess.” His iron will came through in his voice and in the rigid set of his broad shoulders. “And you think I’ve failed?”
“Yes. Insofar as you didn’t ask all the things you wanted to.” Jess felt her arms stiffen at her sides. She clenched her shaky hands and stomped one high-heeled foot against the wooden planks. Say it, Tom—say it!
“Okay, let’s start with the ring. Who gave it to you?”
Jess glanced at the precious heirloom on her finger. “It was my grandmother’s. I–I just found it last night, though it was never lost.” Her voice came out a hoarse whisper.
“Your grandmother’s?”
“Yes. I discovered it, along with a letter from my father, in the wooden lockbox he used to keep in his room. He said after he was gone, I should open it when I was ready.”
Tom reached out, and suddenly she was in his arms, her face pressed against his solid chest. “I’m sorry, Jess. I guess it was better if I hadn’t asked at all. Because it doesn’t matter—”
“What?” Jess broke free of the short-lived respite of his embrace. She tugged at the waistline of her gown, shuddering, suddenly feeling exposed. “It doesn’t matter?”
“No. It doesn’t.” Tom took a step toward her.
Jess stepped back. “And—and Frank, slobbering all over me. . .”
Tom closed the small gap between them. “I guess I’ll have a talk with Frank about that later.”
“Oh, please, don’t bother. Frank only did it to make you jealous.” Seeing the amusement in Tom’s eyes, Jess gritted her teeth.
“I always knew that guy was a nut case.” Tom laughed.
Jess found herself with her back pressed against the cold railing and Tom gazing down into her face. He sobered, and his dark eyes held a secret expression. Over the pounding surf, music from the reception hall drifted to her ears like a taunt. “That Corinne is—is ridiculous.” She squeezed her eyes shut. His nearness was a much more dangerous taunt.
“Corinne? Why?”
“That stupid song.” Jess shook her head. If things had turned out differently, the song would’ve sounded beautiful in her ears. “I–I made her promise not to play it.”
“Hmm. There’s a rumor going around like that.” Tom frowned. “And I thought to myself, if Corinne was too intimidated to have the band play it, then I would.”
“Who—what—?” Staring into his handsome face, she bit her lip to stifle a gasp.
❧
“On my way in.” Tom wound his arms around her tiny waist, locking his hands behind her back. Her moonlit eyes widened. She opened her mouth as if to speak. “I spoke with Nick.”
“Nick?” Jess licked her lips. She didn’t blink.
“Nick’s the bandleader.” Tom bit back a grin. “And I said, ‘Nick, I’m so in love with that woman over there.’ I pointed to you. ‘You’ve got to play “Endless Love” for us, because there’s no chance we’ll get over each other this side of heaven.’ ” He felt Jess trembling, watched a shaky smile grace her gorgeous face.
“Tom. . .” Tears spilled down her cheeks.
Tom cleared his throat. “And Nick says—mind you—in the worst Brooklyn accent I’ve ever heard, ‘Hey, why doncha ask her ta marry ya?’ ”
Jess’s porcelain shoulders shook with quiet laughter. “And what did you say, Tom?”
“Well, you know me. Never have been a risk-taker.”
Smiling, Jess ran her fingers through his hair. “That isn’t true. You skated down that steep garage—”
“Ah, that was only to impress you.”
Resting both her hands on his shoulders, her blue gaze captured his. “Are you going to impress me again, Tom?”
He shrugged. “Only if asking you to marry me will impress you. Otherwise I—”
“But you’ve changed. You can’t care how I respond.”
“Hmm. You have me there.” Tom released his hold on her. He dropped down to one knee, looked up into her sparkling eyes, and pressed her delicate hands. “Jessica Stewart, I love you with all my heart. I always have, and I always will. I’m asking you to marry me. Please say yes, or you’ll be solely responsible for my never taking another risk.”
Tom stood and faced her, smiling.
Jess expelled a breath. “Oh, even if I weren’t madly in love with you, I would’ve had to say yes. Daddy enclosed this ring in his letter, with strict instructions to marry you.”
“What? And you made me get down on one knee?” Tom crushed her to himself and laughed. “Dean always could read me. Did he know I was in love with you?”
“Yes—madly.” Jess giggled.
Tom shook his head. “And since when was Dean ever wrong?”
“Never.” Jess tilted her chin.
Tom’s lips came down to meet hers. He kissed her with a passion borne of years of waiting. He pushed out of his mind the noises coming from behind them, until he could no longer ignore the fracas. Drawing back reluctantly, he looked into Jess’s face, watching her eyes widen.
Tom turned.
Frank, Corinne, Rick, Marilyn, and Keith stood side-by-side grinning and applauding.
Corinne planted a hand on her hip. “I knew you’d get all the attention on my day, Missy.”
“Does this mean I don’t get your office?” Frank scowled.
Tom turned to Jess. With her hand clamped over her mouth, her shoulders shook with laughter.
“Jess, if you’ll stop laughing for a minute. . .” Tom summoned his most serious tone. “Do you want to stay in New York or go to—”
“Go, go!” their friends shouted in unison.
Jess slipped her arm around his waist. “Wherever you go, I’ll go.”
A collective groan came from the peanut gallery. Tom waved them away. “Break it up, will you? The show is over.”
About the Author
KRISTIN
BILLERBECK lives in California’s beautiful Gold Country with her husband and four small children. Besides writing, Kristin loves reading, outings with her family, and eating out! Visit her on the Web at www.kristinbillerbeck.com or e-mail her at [email protected].
NANCY TOBACK has been married to her evangelist husband Jack for eighteen years. She has two adult children and a twelve-year-old son. Nancy was born and raised in Manhattan and now resides in Long Beach, New York, about forty minutes from the Big Apple. When there’s spare time after being wife, mother, and writer, Nancy enjoys being watercolorist, charcoal artist, and cooking gourmet food.
Dedication
In loving memory of my dear, sweet sister Annette—my best friend. Thank you for your encouragement and prayers.
I’ll so miss your smile, though I know you are in a far better
place now, in the arms of our heavenly Father.
I love you.
Nancy
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Kristin Billerbeck and Nancy Toback
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