by T. S. Hill
“And Rosita was thinking about doing what she always did. Stay natural, and stay dark!”, Rosita said, smiling for the first time that day.
“Tell you what, ladies!”, I said loudly, over the women’s chatter, “If we can get this data all processed, I’ll spring for all of you to go to the salon. Hair, nails, waxes, pedicures, the works!”
“Cowboy,” Lori said coyly. “Since we’re all kind of washed out today, and not good for this work that has to be deadly accurately, wouldn’t today be a good day to just go ahead and take care of that?” All of the women, fell silent, and looked at me with pleading eyes. I looked each of them in the eyes, one at the time. Then sat silently for a few moments. They all looked like they secretly had their fingers crossed. Finally, I broke my silence.
“Annette, take the golf cart back to the main house, and leave it there with Tony, so that he will have it to shuttle Al out to the heli-pad. Ask him if he can leave us lunch in the kitchen that we can serve to ourselves. Tell him, that I’ll be needing a car to run my errands in, and to take you home for you to pack for you stint here. If Al hasn’t already designated you a guest room, tell Tony to assign you one. Bring me whatever car keys he gives you back, and the code for the garage. After I take you home to pack, and while I run my errands, I’ll drop you all off, at whatever solon you can get an appointment.” All three of my women squealed loudly, even the hungover two.
“Can Annette go with us to the salon?”, Sasha asked.
“Sure, I said I would spring for everybody.”, I said. “The rest of today is pretty much a bust!”
“A bust like this?”, Sasha quipped, taking a deep breath and puffing out her chest.
“I wish!”, I replied, and they all laughed.
“This is the strangest first day at work, that I’ve ever had in my life!”, Annette said.
“Honey,”, Lori piped up, “as, they say, you ain’t seen nothing yet!” Sasha and Rosita both giggled and laughed. Annette looked sheepish, and maybe even just a bit scared.
“Girl, this day ain’t even half over yet!”, Sasha told her giggling.
“Okay!”, I said, turning my attention back to Annette. “Get moving girl! We’re burning daylight!
“Yes sir!”, she snapped, jumping up. “I mean Tagg, sir. I mean Tagg.” Then she mumbled under her breath, as she headed for the front door, “Damn that’s just weird!”
Turning back to the women, I looked them over. “As delicious as you all look dressed like this,”, I said. “I think that you might want to change before we head into the salon. Plus, if Tony’s around the kitchen, he may be frightened by naked turquoise, pink, and blue women with Caucasian heads.” They all giggled, and I had a pretty good laugh myself. “It’s almost noon, so I’m going out to the heli-pad to see Al off.”, I said. “When I get back we’ll all head to the kitchen and grab something to eat.”
As I headed to the door, I heard Sasha mumbling, “Naked negro with a Caucasian head! That Tony dumbass belongs in the kitchen.”
“Oh Sash!”, I called back. “I talked with Tony this morning, when I went to get the burritos. He’s still expressing his grief over that bad joke he made at you last night. Says that’s why he covered for us in the garden. Says he owes you for the slight he did you.”
“Hah! Maybe he has some redeeming value after all!”, She called back to me.
Then I heard Lori ask her, “What did you do in the garden that Tony had to cover for you?”
“Long story! I’ll tell you later.”, Sasha replied. “It never would’ve mattered if we hadn’t fallen asleep naked.”
“Yes, tell me later.”, Lori replied, as I was shutting the door. “It’ll be much more interesting without this hangover.”
I walked out to the heli-pad and arrived just as Markum was setting the Sikorsky down. Before the props had wound down, I spotted the golf cart on its way with Al and Tony. When the cart stopped, Al got out and headed my way, while Tony met Markum, about halfway between the cart and the chopper, and they handed off Al’s suitcase and brief satchel.
“Tagg, did you come out to just be sure that I’m leaving, or do you have good news for me?”, he said loudly, chuckling.
“Truthfully Al, I just wanted to make damn sure that you were gone, before I invite the local college campus over for a keg party, but I do have some news. None of its especially good.”
“Leave it to you to be a smart ass, Tagg.”, he chastised me.
“I didn’t start this one Al!”, I said grinning. “But, yeah, we did get a start, a feeble one, and Annette has taken my team in stride, and is doing a good job. That’s the good news. The bad news is that the start was feeble, but I told you that already. Mainly because, someone started funneling the women champagne last night!”
“Now what kind of misguided fool would do something like that Tagg?”, he said laughing.
“How can you drink like that Al, and still be in this good of humor the next day?”
“I don’t know son, but if you find the secret, put it in a bottle, and I bet that you could get a pretty dollar for it.”, he said winking at me.
“Have a good trip Al, and I hope I’ll have news for you when you get back.”
“I hope that you’ve got damn good news for me when I get back. I already know what I’m going to run into at NASA. But, I just want to confirm it. I don’t plan on making a fuss, if you’re worried about that. But, I’ll let you know what I find. You’ll need to know for your investigation. And, we both need to know, so we round up every last one of these cotton picking, low down, scum bag, thieving, sons of bitches, and do something with them! You know Tagg, I may not just fire every one of them, but I may load them all on a plane, and fly them to freaking Venezuela, and put them out on the streets, with no ID, and no money. I bet it would be a long damn time before we had to be bothered with any of them back here in the US of A!”
“Keep that thought Al. It may not be exactly legal, but I like the idea! And, let me know what you find out at NASA!”
I’ll email the usual account, with the encrypted, and coded, message as usual. I don’t think anybody’s gotten into that yet.”
“Have a safe trip!”, I yelled, gripping his hand and shaking it, as the chopper was starting to spin up. He ducked, and ran to the chopper’s fold down steps. As soon as he was in, Tony folded up the steps, and shut the door, banging on the forward copilot door to signal Markum. Retreating to beside me, Tony held his hands over his ears, and watched along side of me, as the Sikorsky cleared the tree line, and then the horizon.
“I gave Annette car keys for you.”, Tony said to me, as soon as our hands came down from covering our ears.
“Which car is it?”, I asked.
“The Porsche 911”, Tony responded. “I thought that you might enjoy driving that.”
“Actually not, Tony.”, I said, and watched his face fall. “I need something nondescript, not something that attracts attention. What else you got?”
“Well I put the Lincoln in the shop for repair this morning.”, he said.
“Didn’t want that either.”, I sniped at him. “Don’t you have something that’s just none descript? A fucking Taurus, or Edge, or something? An SUV?”
“Oh, the Hummer!”, he said excitedly.
“A Hummer is the most nondescript thing that Al Longworth has to drive?”
“Well, actually, yeah.”, Tony said dejectedly. “You know, they’re kind of a dime a dozen now.”
“It’s not one of those over chromed, ghetto, drug dealer looking ones, is it?”, I asked.
“No, it’s kind of a plain one. Black, but nice inside.”, Tony drawled, rolling his eyes.
“Jeepers! If that’s the most nondescript that you’ve got, I guess I’ll take it then.”, I shot back at him, feeling a little frustrated.
“Come with me to the garage and I’ll get you the keys now.”, he said. “When you come back to take the hummer, just hang the Porsche keys back up.”
“Tony! You keep
the freaking car keys in the garage with the cars?”
“That’s the way Mr. Longworth likes to do it.”
“Tony, before you go to take your, much deserved, nap, I want you to relocate all of the car keys to a safe location in the house. The back of the food pantry door, would be a good place.”
“But Mr. Longworth…”
“Listen to me Tony! What did Al say last night? If he’s incapacitated, I’m in charge. He’s not here, and you can’t reach him, and I’m in charge of security, completely, for Longworth Enterprises! Move, the fucking, keys!”
“Yes sir! I will move them! But, it’s up to you to explain all of this to Mr. Longworth.”
“Don’t worry Tony. I’ll take care of Al, you just do as I say. And, I’m sorry that I yelled at you. When I got here, Al wasn’t even locking his back door! He’s the second-best friend that I have in this whole world, and I’ve only got two of those. I’ll be damned if I’m going to let anything bad happen to him, if it’s in my power to prevent it. Just move the keys, okay? I’m taking the girls all with me after lunch, and you can sleep the entire afternoon away if you want. You deserve it, after last night. And don’t think that I don’t appreciate what you did for Sasha and me this morning. If you hadn’t come out to the rose garden when you did, that could have been embarrassing. Annette tells me that you must be an okay guy, otherwise Al Longworth wouldn’t have you here.”
“It’s okay, Mr. Hill. I know that you have Mr. Longworth’s best interest at heart. I worry about him too, but I don’t have the influence with him that you do.”
“You think that I have influence with Al?”
“Oh yes, sir! He puts great store in what you think, or have to say about anything.”
“I never realized that. Although, I have always put great store in what Al thought, or said, about anything.”
“I think you guys mean more to each other than either of you realizes.”, Tony said. “Has he ever told you that he always thought of you as the nephew, or son, that he never had?”
“Yeah, maybe a couple of times.”, I mumbled, as I pondered over what Tony had said.
“He means it!”, Tony said. That’s one thing that I have learned while working for Al Longworth, and that is that he damn well means every word that he says. Even when he’s joking most of the time.”
“Do you think that he’s really considering taking all of his crooked employees to Venezuela and dumping them?”
“If that’s what he said, sure, probably so.”, Tony replied seriously.
“Damn! Houston’s going to have the world’s record for missing persons cases filed in one week, huh? You know, the police may get suspicious when they find that all of their missing persons cases worked at Longworth Enterprises.”
“That was my thought, too,”, Tony said, in a lamenting way.
“You’re going to have to help me talk him out of that. Maybe he can pick one or two of the worst ones and we can send them. But, not numbers of them. Think about that while you nap this afternoon Tony, and let me know what you think.”
“Oh, like I’m going to even sleep now?”, Tony said.
“Welcome to my world, Tony!” Or as Sasha or Lori would say, Welcome to my fucking world! This is what you get when you deal with Al Longworth thinking.”, I said.
“Well Al Longworth thinking has made a lot of money!”, Tony countered.
“Confidentially, Al Longworth thinking has made me a lot of money too Tony.”
“Yeah me too, Mr. Hill.”, Tony said meekly. In fact, if things stay on track, I’ll be able to retire at forty.”
“No shit, Tony?”
“No shit. Mrs. Baker could already retire if she wanted, but she says she likes what she does, and doesn’t want to change anything or retire.”
“Tony, quit calling me Mr. Hill and sir.”
“But Mr. Longworth…”
“Isn’t here!”, I interrupted him. Stop it and stop it now!
“Okay, Tagg, if that’s what you want me to call you.”
“Something else Tony, what is it with you and Mrs. Baker? And, don’t fuck around with me on this. Answer me straight up!”
“Truthfully? I like older women, and she likes younger men. So, what’s the problem, Tagg?”, Tony said to me in a tone that I really didn’t like.
“So, you think that Al Longworth doesn’t know this, and you act like a fag, to try to cover it? I don’t care who you sleep with Tony, or love, or not. Actually, it’s none of my fucking business. But when you try to pull the wool over Al’s eyes! I’ll fucking gut you like a spring pig if you try to screw with him in any way or fashion. If I find out that you’re a part of this Milinni bunch, you’ll be one that I personally kick out of the fucking airplane, at thirty thousand feet over Venezuela, and not with a parachute! And, I may skydive behind you, just so that I can listen to you scream like a little girl!”
“I liked it better when I called you Mr. Hill! I think that you’ve totally misunderstood me, Mr. Hill. I act gay, and try to cover up my relationship with Rachel Baker, for her sake, and not mine, and certainly not to screw over Al Longworth! That man saved my life, and has made me almost independently wealthy. I’m twenty-nine years old, and considered a bit of a freak because I’m attracted to older women. What’s so fucked up about that? A lot of younger women are attracted to older men. So, where do people get off judging me, or a wonderful woman like Rachel? She’s afraid of what Al Longworth, or people like you, will think of her for going with a younger man like me. That’s what I call fucked up!”
“I know Al Longworth figured this all out a long damn time ago, but you know what? He decided to protect Rachel’s dignity, and let us just skirt by with our little farce, that I was gay, and we just got along okay as fellow employees. We even have separate rooms upstairs, across the hall from each other, of course we share them, but we can’t really share the space, with my stuff in hers and hers in mine. That protects Rachel, so she doesn’t have to worry about what society, or Al Longworth, or Tagg Hill, or anyone else, thinks of her! Now, that is what I call fucked up! What do you call fucked up Mr. Hill?”
“Tony, I’ve learned, in my short thirty-two years, to not be intimidated by people getting angry. So, here’s what I think. I think that I may owe you an apology. If that proves to be true. Then I will apologize to you, and try to make it up to you in some way. But, also if you’ve tried to use anger to just intimidate me to back off, I can promise you, that you will live to regret it, in the worst possible way. Al was right on the verge of telling me about this very situation, just before this latest, horrible development surfaced. When he gets back, or maybe even before, if he tells me something that matches your version, you’ll get that apology, and not only something to help make up for it, buy my moral support also for you and Mrs. Baker’s relationship. As you probably well know, my relationships with the women at the guest house isn’t exactly traditional either.”
“But I can assure you also, that if you’ve lied to me in anyway during this, that you will wish that you had died before we had this conversation.”
“Mr. Hill, I believe you, and already know of what you’re threatening. Mr. Longworth and I have had many conversations about you. Believe me, when I say, that I don’t take you lightly. And also, that my loyalty to Al Longworth, would definitely challenge yours. So, I’m going to leave this conversation now, with all confidence of your forthcoming apology. And of my continued station with Mr. Longworth, and also that of Rachel Baker.
“Well, at least you know her first name, Tony. I’m not sure Al himself ever knew that for sure.”
“As a matter of fact, Mr. Hill, he still doesn’t. Weird huh?”
“Not really, Tony. That sounds just like Al. I’ll look forward to apologizing to you Tony. Now, go enjoy your nap.”
“As, if either of us is going to sleep today or tonight, Mr. Hill?”
“Oh, I’ll sleep good, Tony. I’ve got you, helping to watch over all of us.”
&nb
sp; “Can you at least help me take this key cabinet down?”, Tony asked.
“Sure, thing Tony.”, I responded. When we finished taking the key cabinet down, Tony carted it off in the golf cart, and I drove the Hummer back to the guest house. When I got back to the guest house, there was a note on the door from Lori, that said they were starving, and would meet me at the kitchen. I drove the hummer over to the portico at the rear entrance to the main house, and headed to the kitchen. When I popped my head in the door, everyone was there, including Tony and Mrs. Baker.
“Tony!”, I called out. “I need to ask you something about the transmission on the Hummer. Can you come out here a sec?”
“Sure thing, Mr. Hill.”, he responded, immediately heading for the door.
“We’ll be right back!”, I assured the ladies. Once we were outside under the portico, I leveled with Tony. “I don’t need to ask you anything about the Hummer. The tranny is fine, Tony. I just wanted to tell you this. If everything you’ve told me is true, then don’t say anything to Mrs. Baker. You let her keep her privacy and dignity, ever how she feels she needs to. To me, she’s been like the aunt that I never had growing up. If everything pans out as you said, then there’s no need to upset her applecart, just to go through the process. Can we agree on that, Tony?”
“Yes sir, Mr. Hill. Shake on it?”, Tony said, extending his hand.
“I’m thinking that I’m going to be glad to. At least I’m hoping that I’m going to be glad that I did.”, I said, taking his hand. He had a firm handshake, not gay at all, and not overreaching either.”
“That’s a solid handshake Tony.”, I complimented him.
“We both had the same teacher, evidently.”, he responded. I chuckled.
“Maybe we did Tony. Let’s both hope so.”, I said, heading back to the kitchen.
After our lunch of finger food, type sandwiches, I left the women chatting with Mrs. Baker, and went back to the guest house to retrieve the three diamond rings that I had received from Fredrick Segal and hid there. When I got back to the main house, they all were waiting for me in the portico. Toney came around to the driver’s side of the Hummer, and I climbed out. As the girls were all loading up from the other side, I spoke to him.
