Plus, I’ve only seen her drink two glasses, and if anyone can hold their liquor, it’s Lily. She put down two entire bottles of wine last New Year’s Eve, by herself. Seeing as how Lyle’s pants are so tight, I can see his religion and Lily is a sucker for big-bootied men, I’m sure she’s well aware of her actions.
Jennings peeks his head around Lyle and Lily when August says, “Hey, I was a freaking hero. I got that kitten off the bridge.”
Lily snorts.
“That was epic,” I say, remembering how proud August was.
We were walking home from school and August heard a kitten screaming for dear life on the bridge. He refused to leave it. He fell in the lake with the cat, trying to save it, but that’s not the point. They both walked away without a scratch.
“See?” August says with a smug smile as he looks around all of us to give Lily a pointed look.
Lily trills her lips.
“Remember Polly?” Lyle asks and August nods, a broad smile spreading across his face.
My eyebrows squish together. “Who’s Polly?”
August, now a little forlorn. “She was in our eighth-grade class and one of the most wonderful girls I’ve ever met.” He smiles, but it’s sad. “She had Down Syndrome but it didn’t stop her from kicking ass. She was this pistol of energy. Our school loved her.”
“August asked her to our eighth-grade dance,” Lyle interrupts.
August scratches the back of his neck, embarrassed. “I genuinely liked her. She was my friend.”
“Wow,” I breathe out. I didn’t know that.
“I coordinated my tux to match her dress. Got her a corsage.”
“You absolutely made her life,” Lyle says, looking proud at his cousin.
“It was a great night,” August says. His eyes mist, thinking about that night or Polly, I’m not sure.
“What happened to her?” Jennings asks.
August fusses with the buttons on his shirt and he shakes his head. “A week before our promotion ceremony, she passed away.” His voice cracks.
“Oh gosh,” I say with a tremble of my chin.
“She had a heart condition and it was sudden. The entire class took it hard.”
Lyle adds, “They dedicated an entire memorial for her in the common area of the school, though. She, uh.” He clears his throat. “She taught us a lot about humility. She was young – we were young – but she had this soul…”
“She was just the good. She found happiness in everything. She changed all of us.”
Lyle’s expression turns grim.
Lily places her head on my shoulder and I lay mine on top of hers.
We sit silent for a long time. Listening to the car horns and chatter of the people below us. The lights of the buildings around us flicker on and off as people leave work or return home.
My hands grip the edge of the roof tighter, the realization of tomorrow settling in my belly.
Everyone else must feel it too because Jennings speaks up. “Tomorrow’s the day, man.”
I press my lips hard together and look down at the people on the street. They have no idea my life is about to drastically alter. They couldn’t care less. They’re off living their own life and now I’m suffocating in mine.
“Yep,” August says through a sigh.
There’s nothing left to say. Silence blankets us, wrapping us in reality. Lily lifts her head from my shoulder and whispers something into Lyle’s ear. He nods and pushes himself back and off the ledge. Taking Lily’s hand, she turns around, kisses my cheek and they disappear inside.
Jennings clasps August’s shoulder and turns, heading for the building.
I chew on my lip, the five feet between August and I feeling more like miles.
I reach for my glass of bourbon and finish it off. From my peripheral, August looks down at his lap.
“It wasn’t supposed to be like this.”
The world fades away and I feel a rush of wretchedness wash over us.
I shake my head and turn my body so my feet can be planted on the ground, where I feel stable. Allowing my feet to dangle hundreds of feet in the air as I have my last moments with August doesn’t seem like the best idea. I’m more likely to choose throwing myself over the edge rather than watching him marry Tomi tomorrow.
“No. It wasn’t.”
The ink has dried on the pages of our book. Our story is over. Tomorrow, I have to watch him write a new plot with another woman who’s carrying his child.
“I love you, you know?”
I stand up, my legs feeling dense, holding not just the weight of my body but the weight of my loss. “It doesn’t change anything.”
August sniffles, wiping at his nose. “I know.”
He turns around, facing me now. There’s still feet between us and I force my body to stay in place.
The wind whips around us, my long hair flying across my face. I push it back and lift my glasses up to rub my nose.
“You’re my best friend, Belle.”
I chew on the inside of my cheek and feel the ever-familiar tingle start in the back of my throat. “And you’re mine.”
His eyes lift from the ground, boring into mine. “If things were different…”
I stop him. “Don’t do that.”
“No,” he says. “I have to. I’d marry you today if I could. She might have my hand, but Tomi will never have my heart.”
Anguish surges through my heart. What an awful life he’ll have to live – what an unbearable truth I’m burdened with.
I turn away from him, no longer able to see his wretchedness.
He doesn’t allow it. He rushes to me, his heavy footsteps stopping in front of me.
I push my hair behind my ear and stupidly step closer to him. His hands find my hips and he pushes his forehead against mine. “I’m giving it to you, Belle. Will you keep it?”
I want to say no. I want to tell him it’s not fair that he’s giving me something I can’t use.
He breathes in, closing his eyes. “I’m heartless.”
I laugh, a cry following right behind it. “You’re a lot of things, August Wyatt, but heartless isn’t one of them.”
He gulps. “Tomorrow, as I’m repeating the words of the vows, know it’s not real. Those words are meant for you.”
My hands grip his shirt and I bob my head. I push harder, my forehead hurting with the force.
“You’re my air, Belle.”
My chin tremors.
“I need you. I’ll always need you. Until the day comes when I don’t need air anymore – that’s when I’ll quit missing you.”
Despair and hopelessness fill my body like black ooze, contaminating my once-happy demeanor.
“I love you,” he says, whispering the words. They swirl around us, taunting, but never landing on the ground long enough for me to catch.
He pulls back, rubbing his lips together. He stares into my eyes and I look away, down at the ground.
August swallows hard and he dips down to get me to look up. “Don’t ever forget that.”
He pulls away and I let his shirt go, I open my mouth to say something back, but he’s already gone and I’ve got nothing to grasp but the air between us.=
You Know What They Say About People In Glass Houses
“I’m a martyr, Lil.”
She snorts, her heels smacking in sync with mine against the concrete sidewalk as we make our way to The Glasshouses. “No shit.”
The WALK sign blinks and we step into the crosswalk, weary of the cabs and cars rushing by. “I’m doing the right thing, being here, right?”
Lily doesn’t answer right away, she moves her head, right and left, making sure we’re safe. Once we’re finally on the corner of the street, she looks up at the sun. “I don’t know, Cam. He’s your first love. If it was anyone else, I’d tell you to get your crap together, pull up your britches and move on, but…” She shrugs her shoulders and pulls me along the sidewalk, “he’s August. You’ve been in love with h
im forever. No one ever fit the way he did.”
I swallow and bypass two men talking in thick Italian accents. “Not even Beau.”
“You were filling your time with every guy, including Beau. I’m seriously hoping this wedding will be a good way to give you some closure.”
I chew on my cheek. “I hate this.”
Lily slides her hand into the crook of my elbow. “I know. I hate this for you, but no more martyring after this. You have to let him go.”
My throat grows thick and my eyes water. She’s right, but hearing her say the words out loud makes it far too real. Can I move on from August? I have no choice at this point.
Somehow my feet walk up to the massive glass building. My eyes trail up to the top and the sun shines bright against it, creating rays of rainbows and beams. Lily grasps my hand and gives me an encouraging look. Her red painted lips attempt a smile but it falls flat.
I close my eyes and take a calming breath. Plastering on a fake smile, I take my first step into the doors.
We make our way through the lobby, passing the receptionist desk, straight to the elevator. Guests from the wedding occupy the space but I keep my head down, my sunglasses on. My deep purple dress hugs my body too tight and I feel the crushing, choking sensation as I push the button on the wall.
Lily moves closer to me and as the doors ding open, I tug her inside, the clack of her heels smacking the tile. I didn’t mean to pull her so hastily, but I could feel the curious eyes of everyone in the lobby and I couldn’t take it any longer.
I quickly push the button for the twenty-first floor and breathe a sigh of relief when the doors close.
Lily rubs her shoulder. “Dammit, Cam. You about pulled my arm out of the socket.”
I push my sunglasses on top of my head and dig through my purse to retrieve my eyeglasses. “Sorry.”
She huffs and pulls her dress down, checking herself out in the shiny metal doors in front of us.
We fly into the air, the smoothness of the elevator lulling me with a sense of stillness.
When the doors open again, we’re welcomed with different shades of white. Stark white roses and tulips. Off white table clothes. Egg shell chairs. Pearl vases. The only splash of color is the gold shimmer throughout.
“Thank God,” someone says and I peek my head around the elevator door to discover Whitley. In a silver dress, cut off in the middle of her thighs, she looks stunning. The glitter of her dress matches the platinum of her hair.
She trots on her tiptoes to me, throwing her arms around my neck. I quickly let go of Lily’s hand and hug her back.
“How have you been?” she asks with her concerned gray eyes when we step away from each other.
“I’m good,” I lie, cutting my eyes to the ground.
She doesn’t believe me, but quickly hugs Lily.
Together, they take each of my arms and lead me to August’s side of the ceremony to sit down.
I glance at the watch on my wrist as my knees bounce.
Thirty minutes.
Jennings stops by to kiss us on the cheek but leaves when someone calls him from one of the rooms.
Twenty minutes.
Whitley moves her arm around the back of my chair, clasping my shoulder and Lily laces our fingers. Adam makes his way to us, sitting in the empty seat next to Whitley. He offers me a melancholy hello and forces his eyes to the front of the room.
Fifteen minutes.
My mouth goes dry and I’m suddenly too aware of August’s parents’ eyes on me from the front row. Larson and Kitty glance over their shoulders, guilt and sadness etched on their features as Kitty wipes a tear from her cheek.
They thought today would be my day, too.
Ten minutes.
Hands in his pockets, August appears from a room on the side of the hall, his tux pressed. He pulls at the neck of his gray jacket. My breath hitches and I fist my empty hand at my side. He looks so handsome.
He raises his hand, waving at his family and friends. Jennings shadows him, followed by Lyle, Mason, Aaron and Skip.
Five minutes.
The grand orchestra begins to play a popular classical tune and I take a deep breath. August hasn’t made eye contact with me since he took his place and I can’t help but wonder if that’s on purpose.
Two minutes.
My hands begin to shake and I grip the edge of the chair. The bones in my fingers ache.
One by one, Tomi’s bridesmaids make their way to the front, each falling in step with the last.
Finally, Tomi steps out into the aisle. She smiles brightly at her guests. Her egg shell colored dress fits her body wonderfully and I hate to admit it, but she looks beautiful. The intricate lace patterns on her arms and back give the dress a classic, simple, yet sophisticated look. Her thick, blonde hair falls around her face, pearls scattered around her head like a halo.
Tears well in my eyes. She takes a step forward, moving her flowers from the front of her body to the side so she can grasp her father’s arm.
My eyes fall straight to her protruding belly.
There it is. Unequivocally true.
Dread settles over me and I clutch Lily’s hand while Whitley brings me closer to her body.
Tomi walks past us, elegant and poised, living my life.
Just as I’m about to turn my head away from the aisle, I catch a glimpse of Andy in the doorway to one of the rooms, dressed in a formal, cream colored dress, headphones atop her head.
She glares, a sadistic smile on her face. Her eyebrows raise, her victory gesture.
I feel heat rush to my cheeks and I turn away, the blow already struck.
She’s won.
August, his eyes devoid of life, offers Tomi his hand and he lamely smiles at Tomi’s dad when he releases her, leading Tomi to stand in front of him.
August licks his lips and turns his back from us to face the minister.
“Today we’re fortunate enough to witness the marriage of Tomi Laurel Hallan and August Eugene Wyatt,” the minister begins with the sweep of his hands. “It’s not every day you find a couple so in love, but here they stand, in front God and their families.
“Today is a celebration. Today we unite a family in the sacred unity of marriage.” August lets go of Tomi’s hand and they pivot on their feet to face each other. “You don’t need a ceremony to have a marriage, but the ritual has been such an important cultural tradition stretching from the farthest town in the smallest city to the most populated town in the largest city. Love is the ultimate unifier, and today, in front of their friends and family, August and Tomi wish to publically showcase their love.”
The minister turns to August. “August Wyatt, do you promise to love and cherish Tomi for the rest of her life? Till death do you part?”
August shifts on his feet and for the first time, he turns his head, meeting my eyes. He swallows, his expression pleading. I attempt a smile but even I don’t believe it. His shoulders fall and as he opens his mouth, Tomi lets out a low scream, grabbing at her abdomen.
August moves his head back to Tomi, his eyebrows furrowed. Tomi releases August hand and the minister offers her his hand as she finds her balance.
The entire room goes silent, only small gasps releasing from patrons’ mouths.
A small splash hits the floor and Tomi, shock written all over her face, looks down between her legs.
“Tomi?” August says and his parents stand up in a rush.
I hold my breath, air stopping completely.
Tomi blinks, her eyes fluttering rapidly. “My…” She breathes through her obvious discomfort. “My water broke.”
August is the first to jump into action, taking her by the elbow, leading her down the aisle.
As they pass us, Tomi’s eyes find mine and my mouth falls open. Her menacing look about knocks me on my ass. It’s quick and before I can comprehend it, they’re gone in a blaze, family following close behind.
It takes all of five minutes for the ballroom to empt
y and soon it’s just Whitley, Jennings, Lily, Adam and I.
Jennings blows out all the air from his lungs and clasps Whitley’s hand. “Well, damn.”
It’s then that my phone rings in my purse and I pull it up, not recognizing the number.
“Hello?”
The person on the other end of the line huffs. “Is this Campbell Potter?”
“Yes.”
“Your mother is in the hospital…”
I hear nothing else.
With the phone against my ear, I turn, running for the door.
“Any news?” Lily asks, handing me a cup of coffee.
I release my thumbnail, taking the drink, thanking her. “No. She’s still in surgery.”
Whitley and Jennings offer a small smile from across the waiting room and I look down at my phone.
When I got the call from the hospital, I went straight to the airport and got on the first flight back to Georgia. I was skidding into the parking lot with Lily, Whitley and Jennings in tow, six hours later.
Mama had a heart attack, and all the doctors know is that she has at least one major artery blocked, possibly more. They immediately decided to perform an emergency bypass surgery.
I curl my legs up on the chair and sip my coffee. It’s bland and tasteless, but at least it’s something to distract me from what’s going on in the operating room a few hundred feet from me.
It’s almost five hours before the doctor appears in the waiting room.
He pulls his face mask away from his mouth and slides off the wrap around his head. “She’s stable, but we’re waiting for her to wake up. She had two fully blocked arteries and one other was at sixty percent. You’ll be able to see her in a bit.”
I stand up, wringing my hands in front of my body. I’m still in my dress from the wedding, and I’m sure I look a mess. “She’ll be okay?”
Whitley and Jennings stand up, worry engraved on their faces. They’re dressed in their wedding attire, too.
Lily rises from her chair and tugs on her dress.
“We’re still waiting. She isn’t in the clear yet. I’ll let you know the moment it changes.”
My hand trembles as I cover my mouth, but I nod. With a solemn gaze, the doctor turns around, pushing through the double doors, leaving us behind.
Who Needs Air Page 23
