“You handed me an impossible ultimatum—having to choose between the company I love, the dreams I have for the future, and the man I love.” His eyebrows rose at my use of the L-word. “And to make matters worse, you didn’t even give me the chance to explain last night. You simply texted and said I was fired. A text!” I shook my head. “Do you realize how many more instances like this will happen to me in my future?” Even one without Rory in it. The thought had my heart shattering all over again, but I kept my face even. “Regardless of who is by my side, or if I’m alone forever, there will always be someone in the media out to get me. Just as they have been you for years.”
I took a deep breath, forcing the emotions flooding my body to calm.
“You threatened me over fear of a public relations fiasco and some consumer backlash bullshit. You pushed me to this exit.” I scooped the box off the desk and walked around it, stopping just in front of him. “I hope to God you pulled the reports I told you to. Hope you realize how much this company’s increase in profit margins, employment retainability, and product innovation rose after I implemented more movements than you know what to do with.”
I walked to the doors of what had been my second home since childhood. A heavy, sick weight set on my chest but I swallowed past it.
“Paige?”
The softness in my father’s voice forced me to turn and look at him.
“Was it worth it?” His eyes fell to my belly, and I shifted the box in my hands, suddenly worried he could see right through me.
Thoughts of Rory flooded my mind—as did the two pink lines on the test I’d taken right before he’d picked me up last night for the event. I was going to tell him after the party. After I’d had time to get my head on straight. Then all hell had broken loose because he couldn’t keep hold of his temper. And even after all that—after knowing I’d lost my dream shelter and my position in this company because of the terms my father had set around my relationship with Rory—I’d forgiven him before he’d even reached me at the elevators.
His cold, hurtful tone, his emotionless eyes as he brushed our relationship off as nothing more than the contract it had started off as had shattered my heart into a thousand tiny pieces. He’d called me a hassle and the realization that I was the one thing he wasn’t willing to fight for had left me a sopping, broken mess.
Or that could be the hormones. Maybe a combo of both.
Either way, I’d managed to pull myself together long enough to come into the office today and give my father a piece of my mind. While his temper had cooled overnight, mine had not, and I was done being treated like a little girl playing at running a corporation.
I held my head high, finally prepared to answer my father. “Ask yourself that question when the company feels the sting of my absence. I was your biggest asset. Now I’m your biggest competition.” I let the doors swing shut as I walked through them, and refused to look back.
“When do you start at Wilson & Rowe’s?” Bailey asked as she sat next to me at Nine’s bar.
Jeannine slid an ice water toward me, eyeing it like it was poison. “Are you sure this doesn’t call for scotch? Seems like the type of situation in which there is scotch.”
“Stop it, Jeannine,” Bailey chided, placing her hand on my back. “She needs a clear head.”
“She needs to get drunk,” Jeannine challenged, and the two took up a staring competition of epic proportions.
The restaurant had been closed for a couple of hours and enough time had passed for me to work up just enough courage to say what I needed to.
“Trust me. I need water.” I swallowed the nerves jolting inside me. “I’m pregnant.”
Jeannine dropped the bottle of scotch she’d pulled off the shelf, the glass thunking against the thankfully padded flooring.
“And to answer your first question,” I continued, eyeing Bailey. “It’s an open invitation to come work whenever I want. I haven’t given them a final answer yet because…” I gestured to my still flat stomach, completely at a loss…not about Wilson & Rowe’s of course, but about everything else.
I’d been raised to top the company time and time again, and now they’d offered to let me head up their corporate offices here in Seattle. The business side of it was smart—they offered me more money than I made in my previous VP position, and they ensured me the freedom to take the line in a new direction if that was my vision. They’d wanted me bad after we’d crushed them in sales this fiscal year, and I knew I could make a real difference there. It was the personal side, the roots I had in my family’s company, which made me feel dirtier than any list ever could.
Bailey let out a squeal, her eyes already brimming with tears. Jeannine scooped the bottle off the floor, twisted off the cap and took a shot.
“Oh my God, Paige,” Bailey said, wrapping her arms around me, her own protruding belly grazing my knee as she leaned over me. “Wait,” she pulled back, her face going from overjoyed to serious in a blink. “Are you happy? Devastated? You can tell us. It’s okay. Just because I’m pregnant doesn’t mean you have to be happy about it.” The nervous ramble was comforting in ways I didn’t even realize. Thank God for my girls.
“Are you in there?” Jeannine asked, poking my shoulder after I remained silent for too long.
“I think so,” I said, patting the center of my chest that hadn’t stopped aching since last night.
“Have you told him?” Jeannine asked, setting the bottle on the bar.
“I was going to but then last night happened.”
“What were you going to say?” Bailey asked, resting her hand on my knee.
I shrugged. The first time I noticed I was late I had panicked. I was on birth control, and there was no reason for me to believe it wasn’t performing properly—but there was that one day I’d taken a pill a few hours late. Honestly, when I’d done it, I hadn’t thought I’d be having sex that night, but it was the same night Rory had first taken me to his loft.
A few hours changed everything.
“You’re killing me with the silence, Paige.” Bailey’s eyes were growing more frantic by the second. “What was your initial reaction when you saw the test?”
The mom in her couldn’t help but analyze me, and I loved her for it. A smile tugged at my lips as the memory of the two pink lines as they came into view. “Panic. Terror. But also…” I touched my belly, attempting to feel what I knew I couldn’t possibly feel so soon. “Elation. Hope. I pictured a blue eyed blond boy tearing up my house. I imagined Rory reading to him at bedtime. I saw him sitting on my knee at games like Lettie does with you.” I eyed Bailey, swiping at the tears that pooled in the corner of my eyes. “Being a mom isn’t…wasn’t part of my plan. But neither was Rory. And even though we’re done, I can’t imagine not having this piece of him.”
I looked back and forth between the two girls, begging for guidance.
“Fuck,” Jeannine said, chugging down her own glass of water. “See what happens when you start checking things off a dirty-girl list? You should never have made it.” She chuckled, and the joke broke the tension in my chest.
I laughed and cried and then cried some more.
“What are you going to do with the time off?” Jeannine asked after we’d reeled it in, mostly. She’d stripped off her chef’s jacket and donned the black tank top she wore underneath it. “Finish the list?” She joked again.
“Seriously?” Bailey chided.
“Why not? It got her this far?” She chuckled, and I burst out laughing.
“God you’re evil.” Bailey shook her head, but a smile lit up her eyes as she looked at me. “You could call him,” she said. “Use your family’s jet and whisk him away to the Bahamas.”
“Because that makes sense.”
“I’d do it if I had the time and a man who could keep up with me.” Jeannine leaned her elbows on the bar. “Girl has got a point. Think about it. Nothing but sun and sand and a half naked number seven for a couple of weeks. Plus, you’re not
showing yet so you can still pull off a bikini.”
“I can’t. He ended it—”
“Oh bullshit,” Jeannine cut me off. “The guy is pushing you away. Anyone can see that.”
I sighed. “And that isn’t code for I love you. You weren’t there. You didn’t see the way he looked at me. Like I was nothing but a fun challenge he couldn’t say no to.” The truth of the statement stung my chest all over again.
She threw her hands up. “You’re impossible. You love him. He loves you. This can’t be that difficult.”
“It’s true. He was at the house last night, mopey as hell and whining like a puppy,” Bailey said. “I just didn’t know why. But now that I do...well, it all makes sense. He loves you, Paige, no matter what he said.”
“See! Get him!” Jeannine shouted.
I arched an eyebrow at her. I wanted to say that he’d never loved me, that it had been an act all along, but I couldn’t bring myself to believe it. It had felt too real to be a lie. Perhaps I was lying to myself.
Bailey rolled her eyes. “We can’t all wear the professional-reckless-goddess crown that you do, Nine.”
She snapped her fingers, pointing at me. “She was so close to stealing it too! How many left do you have on the list? Two?”
“Three.” I scooted my empty water glass to her, and she poured a fresh wave for me. “Rory helped me cross off more than just his number.”
“I assumed. After the bathroom incident.” She motioned toward the restaurant’s restrooms, and I blushed. The memory was fresh and real and I could practically feel the man between my thighs. Even after he’d crushed my heart, I still ached for his touch. God, I need to get a grip.
“What bathroom incident?” Bailey squeaked beside me. “What’d I miss?”
“Nothing,” I said. Nothing I needed to think about ever again. The sooner I accepted the reality that Rory didn’t think I was worth fighting for the sooner I could sort through the more important things on my mind—like carrying his child while he didn’t have a clue.
Fuck my life.
“I vote finish it,” Jeannine continued, still on the damn list topic. “If you’re not going to explore the endless possibilities with number seven, at least finish what you started.”
“Good Lord, you won’t let it drop until I do, will you?” I snorted. “You think a major heartbreak and surprise pregnancy would be enough to let a girl off the hook.”
She grinned and shook her head. “Nope. This is why I’m here. I’ve always been the one to push you when you needed it. Now you’ve found a man who can do even better than me, and you’re letting him go?” She tsked me. “The dirty-girl goddess frowns on your lack of follow through.”
“He dumped me!” I shouted, but she didn’t accept it. “Fine.” I smacked my glass down and raised up on my barstool to lean over the bar, grabbing Jeannine around her neck. Before she could blink I planted my lips on hers, crushing them with all the frustration I had pulsing inside me. She wanted me to get my list done? This was number four.
She didn’t freeze—not like I expected, but instead moved her lips against mine. It wasn’t awful, just awkward as hell. I’d loved this woman for half my life and yet, there was no spark of need as we kissed. Well, that settled that then.
I sank back down on the barstool, returning to sipping my water as I ignored the wide-eyed, gaping stare from Bailey. Finally, she closed her mouth and tilted her head. “Why’d you pick her?”
Another laugh ripped from my throat.
“Obviously she has a thing for blonds. Look at Rory,” Jeannine said, waving Bailey away.
Bailey chuckled. “I so didn’t need to be witness to that.”
“Another one off the list. Now you have to give me a break,” I said, eyeing Jeannine.
She smiled at me, genuine concern in her eyes. I know she only pressed the subject to make me laugh, to distract me from the royally fuckedupness my life had spiraled into overnight—and I loved her for it. Loved Bailey for comforting me in the only way someone who totally understood could—she hadn’t exactly planned for her bun in the oven either.
I sighed, thankful for the two women in my life who made the hardest day of mine seem a little less dark.
Now, if only they could stitch my heart back together, we’d be in business.
Chapter 17
Rory
Crash! I slammed Bentley into the boards, harder than necessary for a practice.
“Fuck,” Bentley groaned as he pushed himself up off the ice. “Man, I’ve kept my mouth shut for weeks.”
“Ontario won’t go easy on you. I won’t either.” I skated off, trying and failing to keep Trevor Hewitt, and the night he ruined my life out of my head.
It had been a week since I’d forced Paige to see me as the asshole everyone else did. A week since I’d been in love and happy for the first time in my life before I fucked it all up, just as I knew I would. It hurt like fucking hell, but I knew she was a million times better off without me in her life. She’d move on, marry a Kennedy, and have the perfect life she’d been groomed for. She’d be happy. Well...content, at least.
That’s not your Red, and you know it.
She’s not mine anymore. Shut the fuck up.
This battle with myself hadn’t let up for even a second since that night. And today I was letting that frustration out on the ice.
“Rory,” Coach called me to the box after I’d checked another teammate into the boards as hard as possible.
I skidded to a stop before him, slipping inside and sinking down on the bench next to him.
“You all right?” he asked.
“Fine.”
“Ready to play on Saturday?”
“Absolutely.” Game one of the Stanley Cup Finals. My dream. And I was more than ready. After all, if I couldn’t have the dream of Paige, I’d sure as fuck nail this one.
“You seem to be working out something out there. Want to let me in?” He crossed his arms over his chest.
“Nope.” I took a swig of water from one of the many bottles in the box.
“Fine. You’re looking great. Whatever it is you’re doing, keep doing it.” He clapped me on the back. “But not today. Go shower up.”
I bolted off the bench. “But Coach!” There was still an hour left in practice and I’d only just warmed up.
He shook his head. “I said you’re doing great. Just save it for Ontario. I don’t need my players hurt because something lit a fire under you. Rest up.”
I huffed, knowing he had a point. “Yes, sir.”
I unlaced my skates and stalked toward the locker room. Even as I showered, I itched to unleash more pain on anyone who could take it. Coach had said something had lit a fire under me, but it wasn’t something. It was someone. My Red. The woman had made my soul blaze from the second I’d touched her. She was all consuming, and for the briefest of moments, I breathed fire. Now, with the absence of her, all that made me up was rage. I stood under the water until my skin puckered and my blood ran slightly cooler.
“Bro,” Gage nodded to me as I toweled off. He and the rest of the team had just funneled in from practice. “You good?”
I flipped him off.
“Okay, wrong question.” Gage started stripping off his gear at his locker next to mine. He shook his head, his knowing eyes too judgy for my liking. “You know—”
“Don’t, man. Don’t say a fucking word.”
Gage stood, his height just barely beating mine. “Fuck you. You’re being an idiot.”
“Hey now, kids,” Warren chided from behind Gage. “We’re all bros here remember?”
“Shut up!” Both Gage and I snapped in unison. Warren flipped us both off and headed to the showers.
“You can’t keep doing this to yourself.” Gage continued.
“I’m not doing anything.”
“Bullshit. Paige is a wreck. You’re being a bigger asshole than usual…”
Her name on his lips snapped my attention up to h
im, breaking my rage-wall. “She’s a wreck?”
What did you think she’d be asshole? You think a week goes by and she’s skipping down easy street?
“Yeah,” Gage crossed his arms over his chest. “Not that I’m supposed to tell you that.” He raked his hands through his hair.
“What else did Bailey say?” I asked, suddenly desperate to be in the know. How could I simultaneously want to soothe Paige’s pain and be the cause of it?
Because it will be better for her in the long run. You ruin everything. Right.
Something flashed behind Gage’s eyes, but he quickly started digging through his locker. “I don’t know, man. Stuff. Why did you do it?”
I shrugged. “It wasn’t real. It was a challenge, and I failed.”
“Bullshit.”
I punched my locker closed, knowing I couldn’t lie to my best friend. “She deserves better. It was the only way I knew how to ensure she’d get what she deserved one day.”
“She deserved you.” Gage forced me to look him in the eye. “You loved her. Still do. Why are you making it so difficult?”
“Because! There won’t be a time in my life that I’m good enough for her!”
“And there hasn’t been one time in mine that I’ve been good enough for Bailey, but we fucking make it work. That’s what love is! She makes you better, and you take care of her.”
I rested my head against my closed locker, the cool metal searing my heated skin. “Paige. Deserves. Better. I cost her everything, and I’ll never be in a position to hurt her again.”
“Fine, man. You want to ruin your life and hers. Fine. I can’t stop you.” He slammed his locker shut. “Just know you’re making the biggest mistake of your life.” He stomped toward the showers, leaving me shaking with adrenaline.
I knew he was right. I knew Paige was it for me. No one would ever be close to what she meant to me. That’s why I did what I did. Because I loved her and wanted her to have the life she’d always dreamed of. The one where she ran her family company and built her dream shelters all over the country. One with someone who treated her like the queen she was.
Enforcer (Seattle Sharks Book 2) Page 17
