by Howe, Olivia
“What?”
“I said that’s really weird.” Quick save.
“It is.” Felicity agrees. “I don’t know what crawled up his ass, but it wasn’t cool.”
I can tell Eric’s behavior is really bothering her. “Hey, it’s not your fault.” I tug her a little closer so she leans up against me.
“I know.” She sighs. “I just wanted you to have a nice time.”
I grin. “But I am having a nice time.” I lean a little closer to her face. “A really nice time.”
Felicity doesn’t answer—she just closes the distance between our lips. Just like earlier, the initial contact sends a shock through my system. Once it subsides, the taste of her takes over and I’m no longer responsible for my actions. Something about Felicity hits me like no one else ever has. And this—this connection—it amazes me.
She amazes me.
Felicity pulls away first, gasping for air. I bury my face in her hair and breathe her in while she clutches my chest and tries to recover.
I feel her tremble. “Are you cold?” I ask and then realize she’s crying. “What’s wrong?” My mind races through a million different scenarios—most of which end up with my fist through Eric’s face.
“It’s nothing.” She says and wipes at her face. “It’s stupid.”
I gently tilt up Felicity’s chin so I can see her face. “Nothing that makes you this upset can possibly be stupid.” I say seriously. “Try me.”
“It’s just.” She tries to avert her eyes, but fails. “You scare me.”
Something inside me breaks a little. “I scare you?”
Felicity nods. “You can hurt me. You will hurt me. It may or may not be your fault, but I know it will happen sooner or later. It scares me.”
The look in her eyes tells me that she really believes it. “Felicity, I’d rather die before I hurt you.”
She studies my face for a moment. “I believe you.”
I don’t press her further, instead I wrap my arms around her a little more tightly.
I want to make sure nobody ever hurts her again.
***
Felicity
The first thing I notice in the morning is how weird the bed feels. Then I realize I’m not on the bed. I’m still on the floor. And what I thought was a warm pillow below me is actually Trent.
Even asleep, he holds me close. This is a really great way to wake up. It may be the best way to wake up ever.
Ever.
I don’t want to get up and wreck this, but I really have to pee so I don’t have much choice. My attempt to slip away doesn’t go unnoticed by Trent. He wakes up with a slow smile that heats parts deep inside me.
Did I mention this is the best way to wake up ever?
Ever.
“Good morning.” Trent says. His voice is slightly gruffer than usual. He’s fucking adorable first thing in the morning.
“Good morning. Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“I didn’t mean to pass out last night.” He glances at the clock. “I should get going or I’m going to be late for work. Will I see you later?”
“I hope so.” I say before I can think not to.
“Good. I’ll text you.” He drops a quick kiss on my lips and goes downstairs.
I contemplate what this warm fuzzy feeling inside my chest is…and whether or not I should trust it.
***
“Fliss, you up here?” Becca calls out.
“Yeah, I’m here.”
“Uh-oh. You’re listening to Jack White. What’s going on?”
It says a lot when your best friend can tell your mood by what music you’re listening to.
“I’m okay. I’m just thinking.” I tell her—knowing full well she’ll press on.
“This thinking wouldn’t be about Trent, would it?”
“Yeah.” Bitch knows me too well sometimes. “I’m just scared. I don’t want to get hurt.”
“Fliss, if you go through life shutting everyone out, you’re going to be awfully lonely. Sometimes you have to take a chance and accept that the risk of getting hurt is part of it. Hopefully, they’re worth it.”
“I don’t want to lose anyone again, Beck. I don’t know that I can take it. It’s safer to just not to let anyone in.”
“I understand why you feel that way—I do…I just think it’s a really shitty way to live is all.” Becca stands and tugs on my hand. “C’mon. I made hot chocolate and cookies.”
I stand, but raise my eyebrows.
“Okay, I made instant hot chocolate and bought cookies.” Becca fesses up.
I laugh. “At least they should be safe.”
“Hardy-har-har.” Becca says before she sticks out her tongue.
***
Trent
The doorbell chimes and I glance up to see who the next customer is. My jaw sets when I see Eric saunter up to the counter. Great. This asshole again.
Despite my innate desire to punch his face in, I try to be professional. “What can I get for you?” I manage to spit out without being rude or anything.
I can see right through Eric’s smile to the huge ‘fuck you’ that lies beneath it. “I’ll take a large vanilla chai.”
He even drinks the drink of douchebags. I mean, what dude orders a chai? I ring him up and make his chick-drink.
“You know,” Eric says while I hand it to him, “Maybe you should back off of Felicity. She’s a nice girl and I’m sure we both know who the better option for her is.”
I shake my head at his words. “What’s your deal, man? You didn’t seem to care about her last time you were in here. Is this one of those wanting what you can’t have deals? Because I saw how special Felicity is from the moment I laid eyes on her—and there’s no way I’m going to back down so some douchebag can try to use her.”
“Well, then.” Eric says. “I guess let the best man win.”
“I will.” I say with a bit more confidence than I really have.
***
Felicity
There are only a couple hours left until Trent gets off work…not that I’m counting or anything.
Shit.
I have it bad for this guy. I keep trying not to care, but the reverse keeps happening instead.
Ugh.
I decide to go make a cup of tea while I wait and try to sort out my mind. As the tea-kettle lets out a whistle, Eric walks into the room.
“Good afternoon, Felicity.” He says with more fervor than I possibly deserve.
“Hi.” I say meekly. I don’t want to encourage him!
Eric’s face grows serious. “I want to apologize for my poor behavior last night. I’m afraid I imbibed a bit too much and didn’t handle it well at all.”
“Thank you. It happens, I guess.” At least he apologized.
“Do you mind if I join you? I was thinking about making some lunch.”
“Um, no. I was just making tea so I won’t be in your way.” I hold up my mug and duck out of the kitchen before the conversation (and awkwardness) can continue.
I just don’t get this guy! Not only does he continue to climb up my heebie-jeebie meter, but I don’t understand where his sudden interest spawns from. I don’t like the vibes he gives off.
I just plain don’t like him.
Sorry, Will—but your friend’s kind of a douche-canoe.
Chapter Five
"Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness."
~Desmond Tutu
Trent
The more time Fliss and I spend together, the less I want her days here to end. I suggest she stay a little longer and she doesn’t shoot the idea down. All I know is I really hope this isn’t some kind of fling for her. I notice it gets harder to leave her each night. Every morning I tally off another one of our days together.
I can kind of see spending the rest of my life with this girl.
Maybe that’s a little
intense and premature, but it’s real. It’s also a little scary. Only Fliss is too special to let slip away.
No matter how scary it gets.
No matter how much she’s going to hate me when she learns of my family.
No matter anything.
My phone pings, only the text I read isn’t the one I want. It’s my cousin, Marcus. And he’s in town.
Shit.
It looks like my family may fuck this up sooner than I thought.
***
Felicity
“So are you going to do it?” Becca asks me.
“I’m seriously thinking about it.” I tell her.
“You should. We have plenty of time before classes start. You won’t be missing anything at my house, that’s for sure.”
“What about getting back?” I ask.
“It’s called a plane, Fliss. C’mon, try something new and exciting.”
I consider this. It all sounds completely doable. What scares me is just how badly I want to do it. “Let me think about it a little more.”
“Don’t think too hard. You know what you really want—you’re just too scared to admit it.”
I almost stick my tongue out at her while she walks away.
Trent wants me to hang around after Becca and the guys go home. I really want to…
Only that makes whatever Trent and I have something more. Am I ready for that?
I’m not sure…
***
Trent
The door to the coffeehouse chimes. When I see who it is, I go around the counter.
“Hey, cuz!” Marcus gives me a big hug.
“Hey! How are things, man?”
“The usual, you know.” Marcus says vaguely.
“How long are you here for?” I try to ask nonchalantly.
“Only ‘til tomorrow. Have to get back, there’s a lot going on.”
I nod because I kind of understand and couldn’t be happier about his answer.
“You want to hang out tonight, cuz?” Marcus asks.
“I would, but I have plans already.” I say utilizing vague for myself. “I didn’t realize you’d only be in town tonight.”
“No worries, man.” Marcus holds his hand out. “Next time.”
I clap my hand in his. “Next time. You want anything?”
Marcus laughs. “Nah, man. I’m off to the bar.”
“Have fun.” I shake my head as I watch him leave. Some things never change. I notice a shadow in the window and brace myself for the next customer. When no one walks in I shrug and grab my phone instead.
Only two hours left and I can go meet Fliss—might as well goof off on my phone while we’re slow.
***
Felicity
I know it’s silly, but I find it a total relief that Eric is out all day. Becca and Will do their thing and I’m left blessedly alone until Trent gets out of work.
About halfway through my book I glance at the clock. I figure it’s about time to take a shower so I can meet Trent. I’m excited to tell him my decision.
I decided to stay an extra week here and then fly home. Even though this thing with Trent is hella-scary, it’s also hella-special. I’ve never met anyone like him before.
And I don’t know if I ever will again.
Surely that’s worth an extra week.
If not, what is?
***
It doesn’t take long to firm up the plans to stick around for a little longer. Christmas is in three days, everyone else will leave in five. I’ll stay with Trent through the New Year. Hopefully, we’ll learn more about us and any possible future before I go back to school.
When I’m away from Trent it’s easy to talk myself out of it, but when I’m with him I’m reminded what makes him so special. It seems he’s been taking little pieces of me all along and I never noticed.
Now he has my heart.
Talk about fucking scary.
Part of me wants to high-tail it out of here before he has a chance to hurt me.
More of me says that he’s going to totally be worth the pain.
That part of me beats down the other part.
Because this guy is worthy.
I hear a knock on the front door and grin.
He’s early.
***
Trent
Eric opens the door, but instead of letting me inside, he steps out on the porch with me.
“Trent. Just the man I wanted to see.” Eric says.
I can tell something’s up immediately, but decide to play it cool. “What’s up?”
“I noticed you had a visitor at the coffeehouse the other day.” Eric says and my spine stiffens slightly. “He looked like bad news. I called in a couple favors and found out he’s in a gang…the same gang that killed Felicity’s parents.” Eric leans closer now, his voice low. “How do you think she’s going to react to that?”
I grind my teeth together. I know when I’m screwed. “What do you want?”
“Tonight? Nothing.” A slow smile spreads across his face. It makes me want to punch him. Hard. “But on Christmas Eve you’re going to break up with Felicity—I’ll be there to console her, of course, so don’t worry. Otherwise I’m going to tell her exactly what you represent.”
“I don’t represent anything.” I argue even though I know it won’t do any good. “That’s my cousins, not me.”
“Do you really think that will matter?” Eric pushes off the side of the house. “Either way, the result will be the same, you know.”
The door opens before I have a chance to reply and Fliss comes running into my arms.
“Hey!” She grins.
“Hey!” I push back the conversation with Eric and give Fliss the smile she deserves. “You ready?”
She doesn’t notice Eric sneak back inside while I lead her to the car.
I have no idea what to do right now, but I do know one thing.
I’m not letting Eric get away with this.
Chapter Six
"Take chances, make mistakes. That's how you grow. Pain nourishes your courage. You have to fail in order to practice being brave."
~Mary Tyler Moore
Felicity
When Trent brings me home, I’m not really ready to say goodnight. I don’t think he is either because he doesn’t hesitate to agree to come inside.
It’s late and all the lights are off. We quietly make our way up to my temporary abode.
I shuffle through my iPod and find a playlist that feels right. Music fills the room and Trent sits on the floor—our usual deal.
I decide to mix it up a little. I go over and sit on the bed. Then I pat the spot next to me. Trent laughs, but takes the hint.
After a while I lay back. Again Trent follows. Soon my head is on his shoulder, his arm around me. It feels so right.
Before I realize what I’m doing, I find my mouth with his.
That’s all the invitation he needs. Trent’s hands weave into my hair as he gently rolls us over so his body covers mine. His mouth intoxicates mine while one of his hands moves down my neck to my back.
He explores me thoroughly with both hand and mouth until I’m undone.
“I’m sorry,” Trent says huskily. “I didn’t mean to take it that far.”
I’m not sure what comes over me…that’s a lie—I’m more turned-on than I’ve ever been in my entire life. I look Trent boldly in the eye. “That’s not far enough.” I say.
“Are you sure?” His eyes plead against the patience in his words.
“Don’t stop, Trent. Please.” I beg.
I don’t have to say anything more. Trent kisses the side of my neck and sends chills down my spine. One hand cups my breast, squeezing gently. The heat in my stomach grows into a sweet ache.
I run my hands over the contours of Trent’s back, feeling the planes and muscles of his back through his shirt. It’s not enough and I begin to tug it over his
head.
Trent shrugs out of it with a small smirk, and then he tugs at my shirt. I happily oblige. The skin to skin contact just makes that ache deeper. I inhale his scent deeply, basking in it.
Trent’s hand reaches the waistband of my jeans. He meets my gaze with a silent plea.
I raise my hips slightly and nod, giving him a silent invitation. This is completely out of character for me, but I could care less. Every cell in my body screams for contact from this man.
And I plan to fully satiate that desire.
In every possible way.
Trent slips my jeans over my ankles before he slips off his own. Very thin layers of cotton are now the only thing between us. I take a moment to admire Trent sans shirt. The ink that peeks from his collar continues all over him. He’s lean, but defined and has this dip by his hip I kind of want to bite.
Before I can do it, Trent’s hands cup my hips and squeeze. The sweet and sudden contact causes me to almost rise off the bed.
“Last chance,” he murmurs quietly.
“Trent?”
“Mmmm?”
“Shut up and keep going.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
***
Trent
She’s a fucking masterpiece.
I look at the body being offered below and even with each touch I barely believe it.
Felicity is fucking incredible.
I gently slip each strap off her shoulder. When my hands reach her sides, she arches up so I can unhook her bra. When it sides away her round breasts fall freely, their strawberry nipples in small beads.
It’s so fucking hot I almost lose it right there.
Instead I feast on them, first one, then the other while I cradle Felicity’s torso in my arms. The taste of her drives me insane. The only reason I stop is my desire to taste more of her.
To taste all of her.
I give her a deep kiss and lower her gently on the bed. My hands run up and down her chest once more before they creep to her stomach—and then lower still. Felicity’s breath hitches when I hook my thumbs under the waist of her panties and slide them down her legs.
