by Bale, Sarah
So, instead of opening the Internet, I turned on my playlist and began working on my new book. Different than anything I had done before this book felt so right. I became lost in my words, letting them tell the story I dreamt about.
When someone touched me on the shoulder, I jumped and yelped at the same time. Luckily no one else witnessed me embarrassing myself.
“Sorry, I didn’t realize you were in the zone,” Lori apologized as she sat across from me. “Cindy asked me to bring your coffee over.”
Cindy, the barista, obviously knew that I had been in the zone and sent Lori over for safety reasons. I’d knocked more drinks out of Cindy’s hand than I cared to admit. Grinning, I took my coffee from Lori.
“What are you doing here? Please don’t tell me you got fired.”
“What? No. I just interviewed the bull rider for my article. We ended up meeting in person instead of doing it over the phone. I came here to finish my notes. The office is just too loud today.”
She had a look on her face that I couldn’t describe. There was more to this than she was saying.
“And how was the interview?”
“It was… he was…” She paused and then said, “He is amazing. And he was cute - cuter than the picture even showed.”
I smiled. “Sounds good. Go on.”
“He wasn’t like most bull riders. He was so down to earth and real. Not like my Daddy at all.”
Wow. She really liked him. I couldn’t remember the last time she showed this much interest in a guy, especially a cowboy. That was saying a lot.
“Did you get his number?”
Her cheeks flushed as she replied, “Of course I did. I have to contact him when the article comes out so he can let his team know. He actually gave it to me before I asked, though. Weird, right?”
I held back a smile. If he had a team of people working for him then she could’ve easily left her information with them. I didn’t point that little fact out, though. She was getting out there and meeting new people, even if it was work related. Sometimes I thought we were all too comfortable with the way things were.
“And then he asked if I’d call or text him to let him know how the article was coming along. Or just to say hi…”
“That sounds promising.”
She took a sip of her drink and grew silent. Finally, she said, “Yeah, it does. I’m not going to get my hopes up, though. We all know my track record with guys.”
I hated that she thought that way about herself, but I also knew how she felt. When rejections were all you were used to it was hard to get excited about anything related to the opposite sex.
“Well, just see how it goes with him.”
She smiled. “Thanks. Amy thinks I’m crazy for even thinking about talking to him. She’d die if she knew what I was really thinking, though. Stace… he’s really hot and I can’t stop imagining what it’d be like to kiss him.”
I knew that Lori looked to Amy for advice and support, and vice versa. The only problem with this was they each had such strong opinions on things that they often clashed. And their approach toward men fell under the clashing list. Amy was a firm believer that romance would happen on its own, where as Lori didn’t mind putting herself out there.
I said, “Look, don’t get all worked up over nothing. Just take it easy and see where it goes.”
She nodded. “You’re right. He’s just so… different that it’s hard not to get excited.”
I knew the feeling, but didn’t say anything. I had a tendency to fall for guys who would never like me back in return. My “curse” was almost comical, except for the pain it put me through. I sighed softly. All I could do is hope my luck would change one day, though I wasn’t holding my breath.
21
The next two weeks flew by in a rush. I wrote until I couldn’t see anymore and when my hands cramped I switched over to editing. Nights and days blurred together and I eventually turned off my cell phone just so I wouldn’t be bothered. My friends knew my routine. If they hadn’t heard from me by the end of the week they had my blessing to use their keys and come into my house and check on me. Until then they were to leave me alone unless there was a major crisis, such as an alien invasion.
My trip to Dallas with Amy quickly approached and I knew this was my last chance to finish looking over my book before I left. Finally, I sent my edits back to my editor and sighed. There. It was done.
As I left my office for the first time in days I caught a glimpse of myself in the hallway mirror. Jesus! I’d scare small children with the way I looked. My hair sat in a messy bun on the top of my head with several blonde strands going everywhere. The sweatshirt I wore had a huge coffee stain along one of the sleeves. My blue eyes were bloodshot and my skin looked pasty white. Awesome.
I went to my room, stripping down as I walked. My poor bedroom looked like a disaster zone, as I had not done any laundry in days. Nor had I made my bed. Ugh. Guess I’d be doing some major house cleaning before I went out of town. But not right now.
Grabbing my phone from my nightstand, I turned it on. The onslaught of messages that made my phone chirp like a dying bird didn’t surprise me. Everyone from my dad and brothers, to my friends, to my agent, to my editor had texted over the last week. I skimmed through the messages making sure I hadn’t missed anything important before going to the bathroom to shower.
Hot water never felt so good as I washed away the grime from my deadline. I closed my eyes and, for the first time in months, I didn’t have to worry about finishing my edits in time. My relief was the best feeling in the world.
I showered until there was no hot water and then reluctantly got out, wrapping myself in my large terrycloth towel. My phone rang from the other room, so I left the steam-filled bathroom to enter my chilly room, my teeth chattering.
“Hello?”
Jeremiah gasped, “Thank God! I was about to use my key and check on you.”
I laughed. “Drama queen. What’s up?”
“Since you’re answering your phone I’m assuming you finished your edits. Do you want to do dinner tonight?”
My stomach growled in response. I couldn’t even remember the last real, hot meal I’d consumed.
“Oh my gosh, yes!” The words rushed from my lips. “Dinner sounds amazing. The usual spot?”
“Of course. I’ll let the others know and I’ll see you at six.”
I glanced at my clock. That meant I had an hour to get dressed and call my agent. She would want to know I’d finished the edits on time and discuss my new book, which was almost finished. Then I would start on book number two. My head ached at the thought, but I also had a schedule to maintain. No rest for the wicked and all that.
“Okay, see you then.”
I ended the phone call and walked to my closet. I felt like dressing up tonight, which was unusual for me. Normally I wore jeans and a t-shirt. Tonight I wanted to wear a cute top and maybe even a skirt. Deadline-free Stacie liked feeling girly.
Settling on jeans and a cute top, I dressed and then went to work on my hair. I was in desperate need of a trimming and maybe fresh blonde highlights, so I sent a text to my hairdresser before blow-drying my locks. Luckily I was a natural blonde, so my hair really didn’t look that bad with grown-out roots.
I flat ironed my hair and then put some make-up on. When I actually tried, I wasn’t bad looking. I made a face at myself in the mirror. If only I wasn’t fat. Okay… I wasn’t fat… I was curvy. I just felt fat compared to Lori and Amy, who were short and slender and basically pocket sized.
The clock chimed in the hallway and I knew I’d be late if I didn’t leave now. Grabbing my purse I headed out the door. Outside, the cool, fall air shocked me and I took in a deep breath, savoring the moment.
Oklahoma had the best falls in my opinion. The temperature was warm during the day, but the nights were crisp and chilly. One of my favorite things to do was wrapping up in a blanket while watching the sunset. The oak tree in my front yard already
burst with color and soon the other trees would follow. My deadline had made the month fly by and it would soon be Halloween.
I enjoyed the crisp air for a moment longer before getting into my car. The drive across town was a short one since our rush hour wasn’t that bad. It was nothing compared to a true “big city”. When I pulled into the parking lot I could see that Jeremiah was already there. I hurried to beat the others so they couldn’t give me a hard time.
When I walked up to our table, Jeremiah gasped.
“Holy crap. You look hot, Stace!”
I laughed. “Thanks. I felt like dressing up.”
“I was thinking about going to a club later. Would you be interested in joining?” I must have made a face because he went on. “A straight club. I’m done with the gay clubs for a while. Well, until I’m sure I won’t run into Treadmill.”
I had missed the details of his date with Treadmill.
“Well?”
He sighed. “It was the worst date ever. The health expo would have been fine, except it ended up being mostly body building stuff. I expected yoga. And when I said this I thought Treadmill was going to lose his shit. He said he thought I was a true fitness buff and couldn’t date someone who wasn’t – and that was the end of that.”
“Wow.” I didn’t know what else to say.
“Tell me about it. Oh well. On to the next one, I suppose.”
Sometimes I wished I could put myself out there the way Jeremiah did, but I was afraid of getting hurt, with good reason. In my twenty-four years, I’d only had one real boyfriend and our relationship was toxic.
I should’ve seen the warning signs with the way he treated me and made me feel, but I convinced myself he was right and I was the problem. I still wasn’t over the way he left me feeling about myself, either. Fat. Not worth the effort. Replaceable.
Jeremiah took my hand and said, “I know that look. This isn’t Michael so don’t even go there. You were young, fresh out of high school, and dumb. Now you know better.”
Our conversation was cut short as Amy arrived. I got out of the booth so she could slide in. Our waitress laughed because we always sat in the same spot. We were creatures of habit, though.
“I may not go to Dallas,” she announced.
“Why not?”
It drove me nuts when someone canceled plans at the last minute. That’s what plans were for - so you could plan on doing something.
“There’s just so much left for me to do before the opening! I can’t justify it-”
Jeremiah interrupted, “This is why you need to go. You are so stressed out that I can see a vein in your forehead.”
Amy covered the imaginary vein that wasn’t really sticking out and scowled across the table.
Shaking my head, I said, “I’m not going to be mad if you don’t go, but I also agree with Jer. You need this right now. You need to take care of you.”
“Well, I’ll let you know. I also don’t know if Lori needs to be left alone right now. She’s been acting weird and I think her behavior has to do with that cowboy she interviewed. I guess I shouldn’t care, though. What she does doesn’t affect me.”
I cocked my head, wondering what she meant. Had they been fighting over Lori’s interest in the cowboy?
Instead of asking, I said, “Since we’re supposed to leave tomorrow I hope you let me know soon.”
“I said I would,” she snapped.
I nodded and took a sip of my drink. That was the best answer I could hope for when she got in one of her moods. Our waitress delivered our food and I took a bite of my pineapple and chicken pizza. I moaned, not caring who heard me. The warm, doughy pizza tasted so good.
“Dang girl. When was the last time you ate? Never mind… I probably don’t want to know.” Jeremiah teased.
I flipped him off before taking another bite. I was in heaven. I should remember the restaurant would deliver the next time I found myself stuck in my writing cave for over a week. Amy and Jeremiah were silent as they ate, which I didn’t mind since I didn’t have news to contribute to the conversation.
We were almost finished with our meals when Lori came rushing into the restaurant with the biggest grin on her face. She could barely contain herself as she sat next to Jeremiah. She didn’t even wait for him to move, which was unusual.
“Why are you so happy? You look like the cat who just ate the canary.” Jeremiah accused with a smile.
“I’ve been getting sext-messages all day!”
Jeremiah glanced at me and then asked, “Huh? You mean you’ve been sexting?”
“Yeah. My cowboy has been texting me… dirty things…”
I rolled my eyes. That much had been implied.
“And?”
“And I’ve been texting back dirty things. And it’s been fun… and hot.”
I watched Amy as Lori talked. She bit the end of her straw to the point that no fluid would be able to pass through. Interesting. For someone who claimed she wasn’t bothered by the actions of her sister she sure was acting bothered. Would she say anything to Lori, though? I hoped not. Sister fights were the absolute worst to sit through.
Jeremiah sighed. “At least someone in this group is getting some kind of action. All I have is my stupid dating app now, since Treadmill ended up being a bust. In fact, I should check in right now and see if there are any options nearby.”
We all knew which app he talked about and I held back a laugh. Nothing more than a hook-up app, Jeremiah hadn’t had any luck with it thus far. He mostly used the program just to see if an available guy was nearby.
“So what are you going to do, Ms. Lori,” he asked after he put his phone down.
I wanted to know, too. Hell, I think we all did. The air suddenly filled with tension and I wasn’t sure why. Like we all held our breath, waiting… but for what?
Lori pushed her hair from her face. “I think I’m going to go for it. I’m so sick and tired of being… well… you know.”
There was a moment of silence. Yeah, we all knew. It was the one thing that made us different from our other friends. We were all virgins - I’m talking pure as the driven snow type virgins. I think this was one of the reasons we were as tight as we were, too.
No one else understood us. How could people our age from our generation make it through high school, college, and still have our V-cards? I’d often pondered this myself. Sure we dated… but the big V made us stand out from others.
Amy broke the silence by slamming her cup onto the table, which made me jump.
“Lori would you please shut up before you embarrass yourself! No one cares. And no one really thinks you’re actually going to go through with anything.”
She began to scoot toward me on the booth, so I stood so she could get out.
“I’m late for my pedicure. I’ll see you guys later.” She turned to me and asked, “What time are you picking me up tomorrow?”
“Uh… you’re going?”
Had I missed something?
“Yeah.” She glared at Lori and went on, “I need to get away from annoying little problems.”
Yikes. I didn’t want to witness a sister fight so I quickly replied, “I’ll be there by four.”
“Fine.”
She threw some cash for her meal onto the table and walked away, leaving us in shock. What in the heck just happened?
Jeremiah whistled. “Wow.”
The tension left in Amy’s wake made me uncomfortable, so I could only imagine how Lori felt. Her shoulders slumped forward and her eyes filled with tears. Oh shit. I couldn’t stand seeing her cry.
Reaching across the table I took her hand into my own. “Here’s my thoughts on your situation. I say go for your cowboy and do whatever makes you happy. It’s really no one’s business but yours.”
She smiled, though it didn’t quite reach her eyes, and said, “Thanks Stace.” She stood. “I better go after her. You know how she is…”
I watched as she left. While I was happy she had finally
decided to lose her virginity the possibility also worried me. Things like this could change everything.
22
I sat in my car outside of Amy’s apartment. Her text said she’d be down in five minutes. That had been ten minutes ago. I used the time to plug in my iPhone and start the playlist I made for the trip. The mood for the weekend needed to be fun and stress free.
Amy tapped on the window, so I popped the trunk. The car shook as she put at least two suitcases in. I couldn’t complain though. I tended to over pack, too, never knowing what I wanted to wear for the night until we got to the hotel. Amy slid into the passenger seat and buckled up. I waited for her to speak, knowing my friend so well.
“Sorry it took so long. I was talking to Lori, trying to knock some sense into her. I still can’t believe she didn’t want to come with us. At least Jeremiah had a valid reason for not coming.”
Jeremiah was the administrative assistant to an oil baron. Sometimes that meant he worked weekends, but he didn’t mind because of the job perks. This time he was going to a charity event where he’d be surrounded by local celebrities and dancing – two of his favorite things. I wished I could be there to support him as his date, but I also desperately needed this trip.
“I’m a little surprised you’re coming, to be honest. What made you change your mind?”
Since leaving the restaurant last night she’d gone back and forth on whether she was coming. I finally decided to stop asking and just show up at her house at the agreed upon time. If she was going then great and if she wasn’t then oh well.
She shrugged. “There’s no use in staying here this weekend. All I’ll do is worry about the opening and there’s honestly nothing else I can do until the actual night of the event.”
Um, we’d been telling her this for weeks. Good to know she listened to us when we talked…
“Good girl. I’m glad you’re finally going to take a break. You deserve some time away.”
“Thanks. You deserve a break, too. I know how worried you were about the book.”
