by Emma Nichols
First published in 2018 by:
Britain’s Next Bestseller
An imprint of Live It Publishing
27 Old Gloucester Road
London, United Kingdom.
WC1N 3AX
www.bnbsbooks.co.uk
Copyright © 2018 by Emma Nichols
The moral right of Emma Nichols to be identified as the
author of this work has been asserted by her in accordance
with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.
All rights reserved.
This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only.
This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people.
Except as permitted under current legislation, no part of this work may be photocopied, stored in a retrieval system, published, performed in public, adapted, broadcast, transmitted, recorded or reproduced in any form or by any means, without the prior permission of the copyright owners.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.
All enquiries should be addressed to Britain’s Next Bestseller.
Also available in paperback - ISBN: 9781980642879
Other books by Emma Nichols…
The Vincenti Series:
Finding You (Book 1)
Remember Us (Book 2)
The Hangover (Book 3)
To keep in touch with the latest news from Emma Nichols
and her writing please visit:
www.emmanicholsauthor.com
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CONTENTS
Thanks
Dedication
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
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31.
About Emma Nichols
Other Books by Emma Nichols
Thanks
I would not have been able to write this book without the significant contributions of a few amazing people.
Eddy - for your wonderful stories of expat living and painting a picture of the beautiful country of Syria before the atrocities of recent times.
Nadège - for your generosity, and engineering expertise. I feel as if I have actually worked on an oil rig for years!
Mu - for your unwavering support, ideas, and amazing book cover designs.
Bev, Valden and Tara - for painstakingly reading through my words, many times, and helping me to make sense of them. Your feedback has been invaluable.
To you, the reader, I thank you for taking a leap of faith. I hope you enjoy the journey.
With love, Emma x
Dedication
To all the women in this world who dare to break the rules, customs, and beliefs, that would have their love denied, or even punished.
To the women in this world who are unable to openly express their love for each other, for fear of breaking the rules, customs and beliefs that would have such love punished. May the world wake up one day and set you free.
1.
Deir ez-Zor, Syria, 1998
Ashley sighed, dumped the UK post-marked, envelope onto the wooden food tray, and rattled it along the metal bench rails of the food counter. She stopped briefly, her eyes scanning the stewed fava beans, fattet hummus, and scrambled eggs. Her eyes drew back to the envelope and her stomach lurched, taking her appetite with it. She ambled down the counter to the coffee machine. Pouring a large mug of the hot black liquid, her hand suddenly jerked, and she stopped, the pot suspended in mid-air, her heart racing.
‘Hey birthday girl.’ Craig’s southern drawl had boomed across the room and elicited curious glances from the oilfield workers already eating breakfast.
She winced, sensing the heat rising into her cheeks. Turning, he bounded into her path, and she couldn’t help but smile at the gaping grin, revealing his uneven bottom row of teeth.
He ruffled his short dark hair with one hand and handed over the small parcel held tightly in his other. ‘Happy birthday darlin’,’ he said, in a quieter voice.
‘Thanks bud.’ She took the gift and placed it next to the envelope, slapping him lightly on the arm. She finished pouring her coffee, added a dash of milk and picked up two sugar sleeves. ‘You eating?’ she asked, her eyes indicating to an empty table, next to the window at the back of the restaurant.
‘Hell yeah,’ he said, reaching for a tray and loading it with a plate of scrambled eggs and stewed beans. He moved down the food counter, his eyes appealing to his taste buds.
Ashley picked up her tray and rucksack and sidled between protruding chairs and poorly positioned tables, to get to the one she had spotted. She placed her tray on the hard plastic surface, hooked the rucksack over the back of the chair, and slumped into the hard seat. Leaning back and tilting her head into the cool breeze of the air conditioning, her eyelids fluttered. One eye on the tall Texan as he added fruit and pastries to his tray, she smiled to herself. She hadn’t expected him to remember her birthday; she hadn’t reminded him. She hadn’t wanted to! She’d hoped to get through the day quietly, avoiding the truth.
Her thirty-second birthday had hit her hard, but more distressing than that was the fact that her love life hadn’t changed since her arrival at Deir ez-Zor, more than a year ago. She hated being single and stuck in the middle of the Syrian desert. The only female in a group of sixteen expats from her own company and over two hundred men at the base made up of locals and expats from other companies. At least that would change today with the arrival of Katherine Blackwell, their new base manager. At least the thought of having female company brought with it a pleasant fluttering sensation in her stomach. And, what if she were a lesbian too? She smiled at the thought. What would be the chances of that? She tried to dismiss her wishful thinking, but the butterflies continued to dance optimistically.
Striding across the room, covering the space effortlessly with his long gait, Craig approached the table and landed his tray with a thud, silencing the room. He didn’t notice. Ashley chuckled, rocking her head back and forth at his quirky ineptitude. He might be able to weld an electric circuit board with his eyes shut, but landing a tray on a table that was too low for him, seemed beyond his capabilities. She watched him squeeze into the chair opposite her.
‘So what’s up?’ he asked, wiggling in the standard-sized seat and banging his knees on the underside of the table. ‘Fuckin’ thing’s built for kids,’ he mumbled, not seeking a response.
Her eyes flicked between the gift box and the card, sitting side-by-side on the tray in front of her. ‘Nothing,’ she lied.
‘Uh huh.’ A wry smile appeared on his face. He shoved a forkful of beans in his mouth and seemed to swallow without chewing. ‘Yer lookin’ all worked up ‘bout somethin’,’ he said, with a laugh. ‘Ya should be celebratin’.’
Ashley twisted the mug in her hands.
‘And ya need t’ eat. It’s real good. So much better with the new cook,’ he said, pointing his fork at Ashley’s empty tray.
Ash’s stomach rumbled. ‘You’re right.’ She made her way to the counter and returned with a plate of eg
gs and beans. The subtle flavours danced on her taste buds and stole her attention from her gloomy thoughts. ‘This is good,’ she said, nodding as she ate. Downing her fork, she straightened her back in the chair and sipped at her coffee, staring at the tray, her eyes flitting between the envelope and the box. Returning the mug to the tray, she picked up the box and unwrapped it with increasing enthusiasm. ‘Wow, thanks bud,’ she said, smiling at his excited eyes. Holding up the bright green bottle of Envy for Men, she pulled open the lid and breathed in the woody scent. ‘How did you know?’ she asked, fighting the burning sensation at the back of her eyes.
He shrugged. ‘I recognised it on ya. I mean, it is for guys,’ he said, a ruddy glow darkening his face. His eyes darted towards his food, his fork poised for the next assault.
Ashley wiped the heel of her hands across her eyes, leant across the table and placed a kiss on his warm cheek. ‘You didn’t strike me as a cologne kinda guy,’ she said, with a tilt of her head. Her brows furrowed as she eyed him suspiciously.
‘And ya had a near-empty bottle of it in yer shower room,’ he added, starting to laugh.
She slapped him firmly on the arm but couldn’t stop the grin forming, or the chuckle that followed.
‘So, party tonight,’ he said, rubbing his hands together. It wasn’t a question, and he didn’t get a response. He picked up a mini-pastry and devoured it in one bite, eyeing her inquisitively. The smile had fallen from her lips, and her previously rosy cheeks had lost their shine. She was staring over his right shoulder towards the food counter, her mouth agape and her eyes wide.
No! Ash blinked, trying to make sense of the redhead at the counter.
Craig frowned and craned his neck. He stopped chewing and swallowed hard. Shoot!
The perfectly coiffured red-hair swayed from side to side, an empty tray resting on the rails in front of her. Even the tilt of the woman’s head had an aura about it that was drawing the attention of more than one man in the room. A low wolf whistle came from the table to Ashley’s right. She tutted, and glared at Zack and Dan who continued staring open-mouthed. By the time Ashley turned back, the woman was looking straight into the room. Her heart missed a beat, and she struggled to swallow past the lump in her throat. You have got to be kidding me! She immediately slunk into her chair, using Craig as the physical barrier that he was. She picked up her mug and finished her coffee in one slug; heat flaming in her chest, she prayed Kate hadn’t seen her.
‘Well, well,’ Craig muttered to himself, with a wry smile, oblivious to Ashley’s reaction to the presence of their new base manager, and his new line manager. Katherine Blackwell! Well, shoot! She’s gone ‘n’ got married!
‘Fuck me, she’s fucking hot ass.’ Zack Leighton’s blue eyes were popping out of his twenty-four-year-old, clean-shaven, face. He had risen two inches in his seat, his fingers instinctively grooming his short dark hair.
‘Shut the fuck up, Leighton,’ Dan responded, digging the younger man in the ribs. Daniel Baas lowered his eyes and carried on eating.
‘She fucking is,’ Zack muttered, slumping back in his seat. He continued to mumble as he bit into a sweet pastry and picked up his coffee.
Heat flushed Ash’s face, memories of the woman attracting the attention of every man in the room, flooding her mind. She slunk further down into the seat and placed her hand over her face. Kate, with her distinctive wavy red locks and almost arrogant disposition, navigated the restaurant effortlessly, finding a single table, obscured from Ash’s view by the single pillar in the room. Ash shifted across in her seat sufficiently to remain tucked out of sight and sat up. She released a breath and rubbed at her temples. It had been a long time since their paths had crossed, but the heat passing through her now, tracking south at pace, wrestled with the tightness in her chest and the alarmed voices in her head. She puffed out hard. Fuck!
‘Ya okay?’ Craig asked, assessing Ashley with a frown. He finished the last of his food, wiped his cuff across his mouth, and picked up his coffee. ‘Ya sure is aggravated,’ he said, shaking his head, but there was also a concern in his tone.
‘I’m fine,’ Ashley responded, her attention distracted by the concealed corner of the restaurant. Pocketing the unopened card and placing the gift in her rucksack, she stood and slapped him on the shoulder. ‘Thanks for the birthday present bud,’ she said, swiftly ducking out through the side door, which led to the rear of the building. She didn’t look back.
Craig was still shaking his head as he rose from the table. Yup, aggravated ‘bout somethin’! His thoughts shifted to the redhead. He could have sworn Katherine’s eyes had spied him, but he deliberately hadn’t responded. Unable to reconcile Ashley’s uncharacteristic behaviour, and seeing Katherine again after so many years, had stirred something in him he hadn’t expected when he made his way to breakfast just half-an-hour earlier. He cleared his throat and scratched at his rugged face. ‘C’mon y’all, we got work t’ be doin’,’ he said, pointing at his two junior crew. Zack and Dan downed their coffee, stood, and followed their boss.
*
Ashley stood outside the rear door of the restaurant and leaned against the wall, her heart thumping and her breath catching in the dry, early morning heat. She reached into her jeans pocket and pulled out the packet of tobacco and papers. She released one paper and pocketed the rest. With shaking hands, she laid out a thin line of tobacco and rolled the paper around it. Pocketing the pouch, she fixed the roll-up between her lips, lit it and dragged the smoke deeply into her lungs. She released the smoke slowly, spat out a loose strand of tobacco and dragged again. Kate Davidson! Her ex’s name bounced around her mind. Happy fucking birthday! She inhaled too hard and spluttered.
Holding the roll-up between her lips, squinting as the smoke drifted into her eyes, she took the envelope out of her pocket and opened it. Pulling out the contents, she noted the Our Darling Daughter message embossed in pink glitter on the front and scowled. It couldn’t be any more inappropriate if they tried! She opened the card. Three ten-pound notes slid down the inside, and she removed them to reveal the words her mother had written.
Happy Birthday, Ashley,
Love Sandra and Jason x
She placed the money back inside the card, folded it into a quarter of its original size, and put it back in her pocket. She sucked slowly on the roll-up and blew out hard. Throwing the cigarette to the ground, she trod it down, screwing forcefully with her foot. Today was already turning out to be a shit day, and it wasn’t even 7am.
She gazed around, briefly distracted by the merging of the deep blue sky and expansive desert to the west, and the tooting horns and general bustling noises from the city of Deir ez-Zor to the northeast. Beads of sweat had already started to form at her temples. It was going to be a hot one; too fucking hot. She ran her fingers through her hair, pinning the short platinum-blonde bob behind her right ear, leaning her head slightly to keep it in place. Kate’s image appeared, and she studied her fingernails, picking at the loose skin around the nail bed, unconsciously clearing her throat. She could face the woman, or she could try and avoid her at all costs. She hadn’t decided what to do before Craig’s voice grabbed her from her musings.
‘C’mon, let’s go.’
‘Right. Coming.’ Turning to face him, she planted a fake smile.
Craig had already disappeared back into the building by the time she moved from the spot. She glanced around the restaurant and breathed deeply. Kate had gone. Her heart thumped with every cautious step back through the restaurant to the main door, answering her question. Avoid Kate at all costs!
The doors behind the food counter swung open suddenly, clattering against the wall. Ashley jumped, and her breath stalled. She pressed her hand to her chest. ‘Fuck.’ The word was out before she could suppress it.
‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.’ Dressed in a pristine white uniform, Iman dashed into Ash’s path. She held out a large off-white cardboard box, her light-brown eyes lighting up her face. ‘This
is for you. Happy birthday,’ she said, with a kind smile.
Ash couldn’t prevent the excitement of the new cook touching her own eyes. Iman may have only worked at the hotel for a short time, but she had already captured the hearts of the oilfield workers with her passion for food and her unique cuisine. ‘Thank you.’ She took the box, tentatively resting it on the one hand, and opened the lid a fraction. Peeking inside, the birthday cake pictured a small 3D bottle of champagne at its centre point. Coloured sugar paper had been cut up to make the small pieces of confetti that lay sprinkled around the bottle, and the words, ‘Happy Birthday Ash’, were elegantly written in rich-coloured icing. ‘This looks extraordinary,’ she said, looking up, a warm glow colouring her cheeks.
‘I hope you have a lovely day.’ Iman said, the kind smile broadening across her cheeks. Turning on her heels, she dashed back through the door into the kitchen.
Ash stood, staring at the lid of the box, taken aback by Iman’s generosity. It must have taken ages to make. She juggled the rucksack that was beginning to slip from her shoulder while balancing the cake in the box. There was only one problem! What the hell was she going to do with a huge birthday cake? Now everyone would know. There would be no escaping a party later.
She released a weighty sigh, and made her way out of the building, juggling the box in her hands as she eyed her feet, carefully taking the steps down towards the parked vehicles.
A loud cheer went up, followed swiftly by male voices breaking into song. ‘Happy birthday to you…’
Jeez! Craig’s operatic tenor voice rendered her motionless before she reached the bottom step. Zack and Dan were trying their best to sing, struggling not to laugh at the stunned look on her face. Positioning the cake safely on the low wall, she started waving her arms, orchestrating the song, trying, but failing, to hide her embarrassment. Bastards. Nothing was a secret in this place! ‘Fuck off you lot,’ she said, with more than a hint of affection, as their rendition came to a squeaky end, her cheeks prickling with warmth.
She picked up the box, turned then stopped suddenly. Goose bumps raced down her spine. Kate! Her eyes darted around; the small group, the vehicles, over her shoulder to the main hotel entrance, and then out to the front again, across to the row of expat houses adjacent to the hotel. Her heart raced at the idea of having to face her ex. Was Kate watching her? Her eyes widened as she scanned. Her breathing was speeding up and her already tight chest tightening. She tried to release the air slowly, but it came out more like a pant.
